Chapter 2: Don't Meet Your Heroes
AN: Hey everyone! So sorry this chapter took so long. I thought that being moved to the graveyard shift at work would give me time to write, but it ended up sapping a lot of my writing drive. But, I know have a second chapter for this story and the third is well underway :)
As always, eternal thanks to my lovely beta annbe11. If anyone here is a fan of the Tiger's Curse series, you should definitely check out her story Tiger's Circus.
Anyway, on with the show!
Empire City
On the streets of Empire City, cars blasted their horns at each other as the various drivers battled for dominance. The sidewalks were filled with hundreds of pedestrians going about their business as street merchants and food cart owners hawked their wares to the indifferent crowds. Up above, trains roared across their elevated tracks, carrying commuters to and from their places of occupation. It was a completely average day in the city.
Until the front of a bodega exploded outward.
Metal bits and shards of glass went flying in every direction. Pedestrians screamed and dove for cover. One man covered himself in stone armor while another woman erected a forcefield around herself and her daughter. A boy with a lizard tail turned invisible as he ran down a nearby alleyway. Everyone's eyes were focused on the damaged bodega.
Suddenly, a bizarre sight waddled out. The man responsible for the damage was almost seven feet tall and was the fattest man the bystanders had ever seen in their lives. The man had at least four chins, no neck, and a waistline that was wider than some men were tall. Even his arms had the appearance of parade floats before ending in awkwardly tiny hands. He was wearing a bodysuit of lavender with pink accents and black pant-boots. A gym bag's strap was struggling to wrap around him while crumpled bills were spilling out of the bag.
"Somebody stop him!" the bodega owner yelled from inside. The villain just laughed.
"BA-HA-HA-HA-HA! No chance of that!" said the villain in a deep voice. "Nothing can stop CRITICAL MASS!"
With another howl of laughter, the villain lifted his hand and fired a beam of energy from his fist. The beam sliced through the air before colliding with a parked car. The car immediately exploded into the air and landed upside down in the middle of the street.
"MY CAR!" screamed a young man a few doors down from the bodega. That just made the villain laugh harder. When he had finished amusing himself, Critical Mass pointed his fists at the sidewalk and fired his lasers into the pavement. To the shock of everyone, the enormous man slowly rose into the air and awkwardly flew down the street, laughing like a maniac as he used his hands like jet engines. In moments, he was around the corner and out of sight.
Among the bystanders was a man blinking in bewilderment at what he had just seen. He wore a baggy sweatshirt advertising a band that had broken up over three decades ago, jeans with a frayed knee, a faded baseball cap, and a pair of silver-framed sunglasses. He had an anchor beard and mustache that were well on their way to turning completely gray. A plastic bag of Mexican takeout dangled limply from his fist. The man blinked a few more times before he tapped the frame of his glasses. Immediately, a number of holographic displays were projected onto the lenses.
"FRIDAY, did I just see what I think I just saw?"
"Do you think you just saw a sumo wrestler firing laser blasts and then flying away from the scene of a robbery?" asked a female Scottish voice in his ear piece. "If so, then yes, that is correct, boss."
The man's shoulders slumped as he sighed, but he turned around and started stalking toward an alleyway.
"Is it too much to ask to get some decent tacos in this town?" he muttered to himself. He passed by a homeless man holding a cardboard sign and pushed the bag of takeout into the guy's hands. "Enjoy," he said before jogging down the alley.
"I am obligated to tell you that you need to pace yourself, boss. You already did a lot of activity earlier in the day."
"Just keep the display up and don't nag me about it. Where's the suit?"
"I started sending it over the moment the shop exploded," answered FRIDAY, sounding proud of herself.
"Good, he said."
The man took off his glasses and placed them into his pocket before lifting his sweatshirt and pressing a switch attached to his belt. Suddenly the sweatshirt shrunk and clung to him as if were vacuum sealed. No sooner did he do that that he heard a small engine streaking toward him. The man calmly turned around and held up a hand. The metal object flying down toward him opened at the last second and clamped around his forearm. The device whirred and clicked as armor plates extended over his elbow and up to his bicep before settling into place.
More metal objects of various sizes flew down from the sky and each of them latched onto a part of his body before extending and connecting with their fellows. Piece by piece, limb by limb, they connected to form an advanced suit of armor. The chest, forearms, and shins were all dark red while the rest was bright silver. A final piece, a gold-titanium mask, was the last to arrive. He plucked it out of the air and affixed it to his face where it snapped into the rest of the helmet. Immediately, the heads-up display activated, showing him that all systems were green across the board.
"Time to go to work."
With a grim smile on his face, the Invincible Iron Man took off into the air.
The Burbs
Peter blinked in stupefied silence as he stepped off the bus. His jaw hung open. A trembling hand rose to point at what he was seeing. His lips tried to move, but only strangled mumbles came out.
"Wha…whuh?"
One of the nearby police officers charged with keeping people away from the police tape looked at him and a flash of sympathy went through his expression before it settled back to neutrality.
"Sorry, kid," he said, looking back to the disaster area Peter was staring at. "It got trashed in a fight between Goliath and some new villain. Repair crews are on the way, but it will be closed for at least a week."
Peter didn't answer as he stared at the crushed concrete and twisted metal that had once been his train station. It looked like some giant had accidentally sat on it and he could see a few cast-off train cars that had the clear indents of a truly massive pair of feet. Hero fights of this scale usually kept to more hectic places like Empire City or Velanden instead of the Burbs. Peter was supposed to take this train about five miles and then walk to his house, but now…
Peter sighed and turned away from the destroyed station to begin trudging down the sidewalk. The way home would now involve a bit more walking, but maybe the trains would still be running at the next station. Peter pulled his flip phone out of his pocket and dialed Home, but only got the answering machine.
"Hey Aunt May," he said, trying to smile as he talked. Aunt May was good at guessing his moods over the phone. "Just wanted to let you know that my train station got kinda… destroyed today. I'm walking down to the next station, so I'll be home a little late. I'll see you later. Love you. Bye."
He hung up and placed the phone back in his pocket, continuing with his long walk down the cracked sidewalk. The commuters of the Burbs zipped along the road, hoping to reach their destinations before rush hour was upon them. He followed the above-ground train tracks, passing pizza parlors, pharmacies, and pawn shops. He walked by his favorite sandwich deli, the yoga studio that Aunt May attended on weekends, and that Vietnamese place that gave Uncle Ben food poisoning that one time.
On the horizon, he could see the towering skyscrapers of Empire City. Stark Tower was chief among them, the sunlight somehow managing to glitter just a bit more off of it than the others. Even if Stark Tower wasn't the tallest building in Empire City, it still knew how to draw attention to itself.
As he turned his eyes from Stark Tower, he saw a television in an electronics store showing video footage of a very familiar armored figure. Peter smiled as she sidled over to listen to the exploits of his favorite hero, but he winced when he saw that the footage was coming from Daily Bugle Communications.
This isn't gonna be pretty, he thought to himself. The DBC had had it out for Iron Man for years.
"…and even though our brave police officers are pleased to report that the perpetrator is now in custody," said the news anchor, a very angry looking man with a toothbrush mustache, "the damage done by Iron Man must not be ignored! The 'Last Avenger', as people call him, takes his sizable ego right from the boardroom to our very streets, acting with no regard for collateral damage. As we see in the footage, he even picks up a car sitting on the side of the road for the sole purpose of smashing it onto the villain! What has our city come to?!"
Behind him, a screen was showing footage of a muscular villain with a Quirk that made him look like some kind of were-boar. The villain was currently tearing apart the scrapped remains of what had once been a car. Strafing through the air above him was Iron Man, firing off repulsor blats that didn't seem to do much to the raging villain. Then Iron Man boosted forward and landed directly in front of the villain, cracking the asphalt beneath him and extending his hand toward the villain's face. A puff of dark gas blasted from Iron Man's hand before he engaged his thrusters again, skidding back a few feet to get some distance. The villain sneezed before bellowing angrily in annoyance and stomping toward the hero. He had gone only a few steps before he suddenly seized up, his limbs jerking slightly, and then fell face-first onto the street. He was down, but clearly breathing.
"Ladies and gentlemen, we must accept the fact that Iron Man has not been the same since the unfortunate passings of his teammates. He has grown egotistical, irreverent, and he thinks he can destroy both city and personal property willy-nilly just because he can confidently tell everyone 'Send me the bill'. Tony Stark, if you're even bothering to watch our broadcast, you will one day find a situation where your cold, hard cash will not be enough to keep you out of trouble." The man paused before he suddenly pointed an angry finger at the camera. "And another thing, Mister Stark! My Stark-brand toaster burns my waffles every morning without fail AND I HOLD YOU PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE!"
At this point, Peter had stopped listening to the broadcast and continued on his way. His mind returned to the gas Iron Man had used.
Is that some kind of tranquilizer gas? No, that didn't explain the twitching. Like he had been electrocuted? Oh, that must be it! It must have been a bunch of some sort of taser devices, small enough to be administered as a spray. Iron Man had enough nanobots on hand to use them as a spray? That's incredible! It must be easy to deliver the shock to exactly the place you want it to go. Power would be a bit of a problem, but maybe he was using something like super-miniaturized arc reactors? How long does it take to make a single nanodevice? If I had something like that, I could-
Peter's thoughts ground to a halt as he remembered the conversation he had with Ned. He gave a sigh before turning from the television and continuing his walk.
There had to be something he could do. He could help so many people if he was a hero. He just had to come up with something that would help him get into the hero course.
I think I still have that blueprint Ned and I made of an electrified glove, Peter thought. Maybe I could make something like that? At least while I'm trying to get Dad's formula to work.
Following the train tracks above led Peter to a T-intersection at the end of the street. Taking the long way around would add almost ten minutes of walking, so Peter opted to walk through the alley between the pizzeria and the nail salon. It was mostly used for employee parking and dumpster pickup, but there was a narrow exit out the other side that would let him keep following the tracks.
He had made it a few steps into the alley before he heard a dull boom. He stopped and looked around, wondering what had caused it. Suddenly, a massive shape smashed straight down onto one of the parked cars with an almighty CRASH! Peter jumped in surprise and turned to see the most enormous man he had ever seen starting to move around again.
"God damn stupid metal asshole!" the fat man said as he attempted to roll himself off the destroyed car. The man's reddened and angry face locked on Peter and the man almost snarled. Peter barely had the presence of mind to stumble back a few steps. The fat man had just managed to push himself off of the car when a second object fell from the sky, slamming down so hard that the asphalt cracked beneath him.
Peter's mouth dropped open as Iron Man stood up from his crouched landing position, his glowing eyes focused squarely on the visibly shaken villain.
"Now you're just starting to make me mad, buddy," said Iron Man, his hands flexing into fists. "And that's after I saw you using my flight technique. Does the word "copyright" mean anything to you?"
"Fuck off, you smug bastard!" said the fat man. "It's people like you that keep the rest of us from hitting up Easy Street."
"Looks more to me like you've been hitting up the buffet line."
"I am CRITICAL MASS!" roared the man. "And I'm gonna be the one that shuts you down for good, Tin Man! I'm gonna-!"
"Heard it before," interrupted Iron Man before turning his palms toward Critical Mass, unleashing two repulsor blasts. The energy beams connected with the fat man's torso, throwing him back against the car before he flopped bonelessly to the ground. "Can't believe you took so long," Iron Man muttered with a shake of his head. "Hey FRIDAY, is the old Hulk Cage still working?" He paused. "Well, just brush off the mothballs and mouse droppings, I need it. No, it only needs to transport this big pink dumbass back to Empire City." Another pause. "Okay, just get it here as soon as you can." The hero put his hands on his hips and let out a tired groan. "Well," he said, "I'll be here, then." Iron Man extended his hand toward the thoroughly destroyed car and a small device popped out from below his wrist. With a light chuff, it spat out a disk that stuck to the hood of the car and began to glow. Blue holographic letters appeared over the device to spell out 'SEND THE BILL TO TONY STARK'.
It was at this point that Peter managed to regain full awareness of what was going on and who was standing in front of him.
"You're Iron Man!" Peter cried out, a disbelieving smile on his face. Iron Man turned his head and seemed to take notice of Peter for the first time.
"And the good news just keeps coming…" he said quietly.
"Ohmygodit'sreallyyou!" Peter gushed, his hands starting to shake. "The number one Hero in America! Right here! In the flesh! You're so much cooler in person!"
"I get that a lot," answered Iron Man. "And, kid, before you get started: no, I will not introduce you to other Heroes; yes, I still run my company while being a Hero; and no, I will not supercharge your WiFi. I just want to make sure all that is clear."
"Okay!" said Peter, not even bothering to be confused by what Iron Man just said. "Oh man, this is so cool! I've been wanting to meet you my whole life. Well, I-I mean I met you once already, but I was really young and you were working so I didn't get a chance to talk much. Wow, I have so many questions I wanna ask you! I'm Peter Parker, by the way. But oh my gosh, you are my absolute favorite Hero and I love all of your suits and gadgets and the fact that you make them all yourself and-!"
"Okay, kid, you're gonna need to slow down if you want me to understand what you're saying," said Iron Man, turning his gaze to the sky above. A moment later, his head snapped back to Peter, like he was surprised. "Wait… I'm your favorite Hero?"
"O-of course!" said Peter. How could that even be a question?
For a moment, the only sound in the alley was passing cars and the snores of the unconscious Critical Mass.
"Hm," muttered Iron Man. "Finally. Someone with taste. Been a while since I've met one of those." He was still talking to himself, almost like he had forgotten Peter was there. "You would think my popularity numbers would higher considering that I still pull in the most bad guys, but people... There's no telling those idiots that. Instead…." Iron Man finally looked back at Peter before glancing over his shoulder at the sky again. "Tell you what, kid," he said, giving his attention back to Peter. "There's an advanced cage flying in to take this guy to lockup. I'll give you until then to ask any questions you have. Go."
"Oh! Really?! Um… okay…" said Peter, wracking his brain for anything he could ask. He frantically scratched his head for a moment before he finally thought of something. "Um, so, how do you come up with new armors?"
"That's an easy one. I imagine new situations," Iron Man said, leaning back against the destroyed car. "Every suit I make gets the same basic suite of weapons and tools, but I specialize any suit that isn't a straight upgrade. I think of scenarios and put in the best tools to handle it."
"Like that earthquake in Idaho two years ago," Peter said with a smile on his face. "You used that suit specifically designed for natural disasters, with the rubble scoops and bracing bars. That was the Model Thirty-Five, right?"
He cocked his head to side. "That's right, kid," said Iron Man. "Next question?"
"Um…" said Peter. There had been one thing that he had wondered about Iron Man over the last few years. "Why haven't you made any public appearances in years? I mean, outside your suit. Like at Stark Industries events?"
Iron Man crossed his arms and stared silently at Peter, making the boy start to feel awkward. After a long pause, Iron Man spoke.
"I don't want people to know that I'm going bald."
"Really?" asked Peter.
"No. Next?"
"Um…" Peter trailed off, looking at the ground and scuffing his tow against a spare piece of litter. There was one question he was desperate to ask, especially after the day he had had. More than anything, Peter wanted to be a Hero, to save as many people as possible and make the world a better place. He had no powers other than his mind, though. But Iron Man was a Hero who made advanced combat armor with his own two hands. Surely he might understand, right?
"Um…" Peter said again. "I… I just want to know… if…"
"Tick tock, kid. You're running low on time," said Iron Man, tapping a finger against his armored bicep.
"Iron Man, do… do you…" Peter said, struggling to get his words through the sudden dryness in his throat. "Do you think that… that someone can become a Hero even if they don't have a Quirk?"There was silence meeting that question. Peter stared down at the asphalt, scared to look up at Iron Man. Something about the man had changed. He seemed to go stiff.
"By 'someone'", Iron Man droned, "can I assume you're talking about yourself?"
Peter gave a jerky nod.
"I don't have a Quirk," he said, "but I'm smart. I can build things. I ace every science course I take and my friend Ned and I make new devices whenever we get the chance. He wants us both to go to the SLA Support course, but… but I really think I can do much better as a hero. Do… do you think someone like me could be a hero?"
"Depends," said Iron Man. " Can you program combat bots to help you in battle?"
"Um… no."
"Can you hack a cell phone to make it tase the poor fool who answers it?"
"No, I can't."
"Can you make weapons powerful enough to stop a bank robber in their tracks?"
"Well…," said Peter, feeling his spirits start to sink, "I can build computers out of stuff you find in dumpsters. And I'm working on this adhesive tool my dad started."
"Cute," Iron Man said, making the word sound like a scoff. "Do you at least know some martial arts? A bit of karate? Maybe a judo throw?"
"I, um… my friend and I watch a lot of Bruce Lee movies," said Peter, cringing a bit.
"Yeah, that's about what I thought." Iron Man let out a heavy groan before refocusing on the boy. Peter could practically feel the glare through Iron Man's helmet. "Let me guess, you were one of those kids who was taking apart the family toaster before you were even in elementary school. And you've been tinkering ever since and wondering when your science classes are going to start getting difficult. How am I doing so far?"
Peter, making an attempt to tunnel his head into his shoulders, nodded.
"You think that's all it takes?" said Iron Man. "You think you can be a hero just using stuff you make from cannibalized kitchen appliances?" Iron Man stood up straight and took two clanking steps closer to Peter. Suddenly, he seemed impossibly large to the boy. "I've seen geeks like you before, thinking they can be a hero with nothing but a screwdriver and some pluck. But listen, kid, being a Hero is a serious business, kid. When you're on the job, you're gonna run into some of the scariest bastards on the planet, the kind that make hardened heroes shit their pants with just a look. If you mess up on the job, you die. If you mess up worse, someone else dies." He now loomed over Peter, his blue gaze seeming to pierce right into the boy's soul. "I've seen things, kid. Things I can never forget. You want to be hero? You want to feel the weight of the world on your shoulders every hour of the day? You want to spend every night seeing the faces of every single person you weren't able to save? That's what being a hero means, kid. You think you can handle that?" His glowing eyes were inches away. "Because what I'm seeing now doesn't have what it takes."
Peter swallowed and took a step away as the words sunk in. He opened his mouth to respond, but choked on the words.
"I…" he said, his voice sounding strangled. "I just… want to be like you."
Iron Man took a step back at that. He actually seemed shocked at hearing Peter's words.
"Well," Iron Man said after a long pause, "that's where you made a mistake, kid. Also, time's up."
Just then, Peter heard what sounded like a small jet. Looking up, he saw a large metal pyramid flying through the air toward them with thrusters at each of its four corners. When it came close enough, it spun in the air so an open bottom was facing the ground before it slowly lowered itself toward the ground. It looked like it could easily swallow two cars, so it clamped down on top of the still-unconscious Critical Mass without a problem. After some metallic whirring and clanking, it rose into the air again, now sporting a solid metal bottom.
"And that concludes our talk," said Iron Man, activating his thrusters and rising into the air.
"But... Iron Man!" Peter called desperately. He could feel tears trickling down his face
"Look, kid," Iron Man said softly, "This isn't the type of world you're made for. Focus on getting into the Support course. Just- grrh!" Iron Man let out a grunt and held his chest. "Just… leave the heroing to the Heroes, okay?" he finished through gritted teeth before turning away from Peter and flying into the sky.
Peter stood there in silence, the sight of his idol flying away blurred out by the tears in his eyes.
Tony Stark only managed to fly a few blocks before he made a rough stumble of a landing on the roof an office building. A specific twitch of his fingers caused his suit to open and he fell forward out of his suit onto his hands and knees. He gasped in pain as he held his chest, his heartbeat hammering in his ears as his limbs trembled uncontrollably. After a few tense moments, the pain lessened and his body stilled. He was able to breathe easier. With a grunt of effort, he pushed himself to his feet and reached into his pocket, pulling out the sunglasses.
"How am I doing, FRIDAY?" he asked as soon as he put them on.
"You're done for the day, Boss" responded the AI in a tone that wouldn't allow for any argument. "Any more activity and you risk your heart giving out. I'll send a car for you and recall the suit later."
"Sounds like a plan," Tony grunted. "Have the car find my location. I'm gonna walk some of the way. Make sure I'm working okay." The roof access door opened without much issue and Tony descended the staircase.
"Y'know," said FRIDAY, her tone scathing, "sometimes I forget what a right bastard you can be, Boss. But then you're always so kind to give me a reminder."
Tony took off the glasses and stowed them in his pocket without another word and continued down the stairs. It was for the best, he tried to tell himself. That kid was too naïve for this life. Why else would I be his favorite hero?
And that's a wrap! I hope you guys enjoyed the second chapter of Excelsior. As you can probably see, this version of Iron Man is a bit of a hot mess. I'm being clever, I promise.
I hope to have the next chapter finished sometime soon.
For clarification's sake, I'm gonna list out the boroughs we'll be talking about in this story.
Empire City = Manhattan
The Burbs = Queens
Velanden = Brooklyn
Mainland = The Bronx
The Isle = Staten Island