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Wakfu: Chronicles of the Lost Ninja

-Chapter 20-

"Excuse me but did he just say future Mrs. Uzumaki?" Eva asked through grit teeth as the announcer continued to embellish about her and Naruto's supposed coming marriage, before spinning around to glare at Ruel as he smiled back at her with a somewhat nervous wave. Then her gaze drifted up towards the crowd where she saw Miranda practically dancing amongst the Real Gobbly fan with a slew of new merchandize her husband was creating, most prevalent of which being little flags with crude drawings of the Cra and Naruto's faces in a heart.

Those near Eva could swear they heard a faint shattering sound coming from her as she clenched her fists and started marching towards the old Enutrof. "When I get my hands on you I'm gonna-"

"Whoa, easy there Surudoi-chan," Cutting the archer off with a hand on her shoulder, Naruto gently pulled her back and shook his head when she turned her glare towards him. "I know you're mad but causing a scene here will just make things worse. We can deal with Irezumi-jiji after the game when there aren't thousands of people watching, just focus on the game for now."

For a moment it seemed like the girl was gonna ignore her fellow blonde's advice as she continued to glower at Ruel with clenched fists. However, in the end all she did was take a deep breath to help relax before nodding. "Right, sorry."

"No problem, besides…" Leaning in close, Naruto whispered something in Eva ear that caused her to pause before smirking wickedly as a giggle slipped past her lips.

"You didn't."

"I totally did."

Over on the sidelines, Ruel suddenly had a very bad feeling in his gut when he saw both blondes smiling back at him in a far too innocent manner. 'Oh no, I have a feeling I just poked the sleeping Crackler one too many times.'

Back on the field both teams were once again getting into position with Eva taking Posho's spot against Jay, who had an even more dumbfounded look on his face than usual for some reason. Meanwhile, Naruto and Kriss once again squared off at the center of the field, both sharing competitive grins as they stretched a bit.

"Decided to bring your girl into the game, huh? That's pretty bold of ya rookie," The star of Lamechester stated while stretching his dominant arm. "You know people can get pretty hurt in this game and I'm sure you'd hate it if that pretty face of hers got ruined."

"Surudoi-chan can take care of herself just fine, in fact I'd say you should be far more worried about what she'll do to your ugly mug instead," Rolling his neck until it cracked satisfyingly, Naruto idly pointed to Eva with an amused chuckle as said girl slammed a fist into the palm of her hand. "Because if you keep talking to her like she's gonna show you why most are afraid of her left hook."

All this did though was make the Sacrier chuckle as his smirk widened. "Well you can't say I didn't warn you then."

Before either of them could continue to trash talk, the ground opened up so a familiar bird statue could rise up into view once again.

"Here we go ladies and gentlemen! The third quarter of this fabtabulous Gobbowl game is about to begin!" The announcer called out, getting the crowd to cheer even louder. "And thanks to all of you, the audience surprise this round is… ICE OVER!"

A thick mist poured from the statue in a deluge, spreading over the entire field within seconds as most of the players and those closest to the field shivered when the temperature dropped. Once the mist faded away, it revealed that the ground was completely frozen over in a smooth sheet of ice.

"Hey! Why's the ground soooooaaaah!?" Dally tried to ask as he slipped and slid all over, only to end up flopping onto the ground face first.

Neither Toot and Calbien were having much more luck on their ends either as the former struggled to keep himself standing while the latter immediately fell on his ass and slid away with a grumble. On the other hand though, neither Eva or Naruto had any real trouble, in fact both were seemingly unfazed by the sudden change of terrain aside from some minor change in stance.

'Well… this is gonna be troublesome, a three-man disadvantage and their obviously targeting Eva since we're 'engaged',' The whiskered blonde thought as he glanced at his team through his peripherals before returning his focus back on Kriss and his team, who were just as unaffected as himself. He could already see Jeremy and Monty eyeing up Eva with smirks, no doubt planning to dole out some payback against him while they had such a wide opening whilst Kriss himself kept flickering his gaze between both blondes and the ball itself. 'He's probably expecting to force me on defense, keep me and Eva busy for the quarter so he can rack up some easy points. However…'

Naruto's smirk suddenly widened as an idea started formulating in his mind before adjusting his stance ever so slightly and tensing his legs.

'That's only if I don't put a few cracks in his plan first.'

Noticing the change, Kriss's eyes narrowed in suspicion but didn't have time to think on it as the Ref started the match with a shrill whistle, causing the Sacrier to reflexively jump up after the ball. It wasn't until he had caught the gobbal themed sphere though that he noticed that Naruto had NOT jumped up with him.

Instead the whiskered blonde had skipped backwards, hooking Eva by the arm so they both were sent sliding across the ice towards their own goal with Jeremy and Monty in hot pursuit.

Strangely enough Jay was still just standing in place with the same dumbstruck look…

"Heh… already running away? I told you that you'd regret bringing the girl in," Kriss stated with a chuckle, passing the ball to Benji as he landed before making his way after the retreating blondes as well. "That's Gobbowl for you after all, there's no room for romance on the field unless you want some heartbreak!"

"I bet you're just saying that because you can't score a date of your own." Eva shot back dryly while dodging out of the way of an attempted tackle by Monty.

"Oh my oh dear! It would seem fabulastic rookie Naruto and his beloved Cra are stuck on the run! As the only ones on their team that can stay on their own feet it's just them against all of Lamechester who are quite comfy on a frozen field!" The announcer was quick to announce enthusiastically, riling up the crowds even further than they already were. However he then gasped in awe overdramatically when Naruto pulled Eva close and the pair twirled in sync to avoid a two sided strike from Kriss and Jeremy then splitting again so Monty passed between them. "Oh my but look at them go! Such grace! Such elegance! In mortal danger and yet they dance so gracefully out of harms way! Let's just hope it doesn't become Gravefully for the Engaged Engagers!"

"Seriously… how does that guy still have his job? He's so annoying, I mean come on, the Engaged Engagers." Naruto muttered with a slightly twitching brow as he and Eva regrouped.

"Ponder about that later, try not to get flattened now," The Cra stated before grabbing Naruto's arm and using it as leverage to swing out of the way of yet another charge. "Please tell me you've got a plan or something."

"Of course I do, quick question, how are you with heights?"

"Just fine, why do you-" Before she could even finish her sentence, Naruto suddenly scooped her up into his arms and jumped towards a charging Jeremy. Caught off guard by the unexpected change the Iop reflexively tried to defend himself with his shield.

"Hey ugly, how's your momma doing? I heard she still couldn't show herself in public because of how gross your face looks." The whiskered blonde said mockingly as he balanced on the wooden face, sticking his tongue out and pulling an eyelid down, causing several tic marks to appear on Jeremy's face.

"I'LL SHOW YOU UGLY!" He roared before firing the repulsion charge on his shield, not noticing the smirk on Naruto's face as he used his jump boost at the exact same time. The combined forces along with Naruto's already impressing jumping ability sent him and Eva rocketing into the sky at high velocity whilst the recoil smashed Jeremy flat into the field in a Iop shaped crater.

"By Gobbowl! What a baftastical change of direction folks! In a completely unexpected turn of events, the Engaged Engagers have taken to the Heavens and not in the usual way!"

"What the hell? What are those two up too?" Kriss muttered in shock, craning his neck as he watched the blondes soar higher and higher, till they were naught but specks in the sky.

"Please tell me that this is all part of your plan!" Eva yelled over the howl of the wind, clinging tightly to her fellow blonde as the stadium got rapidly smaller beneath them.

"Of course it is!" Naruto yelled back with a smirk, before flipping Eva over himself so they were back to back with her facing the sky while linking their arms together. "Trust me I know exactly what I'm doing! Now get ready to fire your jump boost straight up on my mark!"

'Well he hasn't steered me wrong yet,' The archer thought to herself as she did like the whiskered teen had told her and aimed her feet towards the sky. "Ready to go!"

"Alright… wait for it… wait for it…" Very soon their momentum started to slow down until eventually they came to a complete stop just below cloud level and starting to fall back down. "Now!"

With a brief flash of magic, Naruto and Eva were sent hurtling back towards the earth even faster than they had gone up. So fast they were falling that they appeared as if a golden comet streaking back towards the stadium, aimed straight for their own goal line.

"Why the heck would they aim for their own… the ice!" Eyes widening in realization, Kriss snapped his gaze towards the Real Gobbly goal, more specifically the pristine icy terrain. "They're gonna smash the ice around their goal! Monty! Jay! Intercept them!"

"Got it boss!" Monty said as the bulky Osmodian charged ahead without hesitation while Jay… continued to stare ahead blanky from the exact same spot he started in.

"What the hell are you doing Jay! Move it!" Kriss shouted at the motionless Iop, only to get no response. "I said move it your Iop brained moron!"

Still no response.

"Dammit! Jeremy-"

Whatever else the shaggy haired man was gonna say was cut off as Naruto and Eva reached the stadium, knocking an unprepared Monty aside with ease along the way. Literally just as they hit the ground itself though, Naruto slipped Eva's shield onto his feet and blasted its repulse charge, sending a powerful shockwave through the entire stadium that knocked several people off their seats and caused cracks to spiderweb across the frozen ground.

At the same time, the recoil sent Naruto and Eva rocketing once more, only this time straight across the field thanks to the former intentionally put the shield at an angle before he fired. Using the very same shield like a sled, the duo skid across to fast for anyone to hope to keep up with whilst simultaneously shattering the already fractured ice in their path apart completely along the way.

"Incoming!"

"Wha-"

And once again poor Benji found himself on the short end of the stick that day when he found himself right in the blondes' path, the short player getting flattened for the second time as they bulldozed over him.

"Thanks for the ball shortie! Hope you enjoyed your flight!" But not before Eva managed to swipe the ball from his grasp, the Cra smirking as she tucked it under her arm.

"And here our stop!" Naruto exclaimed dramatically while slamming his foot down on the front of the shield, causing them to slow down dramatically as they drifted right to the Lamechester goal. "Whew, now that's what I call sticking the landing. Can I come up with a great plan or what?"

"I'd say more crazy than great but I guess you cant really argue against results." Eva muttered with a nod, idly hopping off Naruto's back and scoring the goal as her gaze drifted across the absolute mess of a playing field they left in their wake.

The entire audience was left speechless as the buzzer rang and the score board changed to 5-1, before the Real Gobbly side erupted into applause.

"I… I can hardly believe my eyes ladies and gentlemen, but that had to have been the absolute craziest and most estrabalotiously spectublar play I have ever seen in my career!" Even the announcer stumbled on his words a bit in awe but was quick to recover as always. "In a complete shattering of expectations, not to mention the field, Real Gobbly not only maintains their lead but continues to widen it! All thanks to the expedactoutious teamwork of the mighty Engaged Engagers and their new super combo, the Marital Massacre of Mayhem!"

"Okay no, you do not get to name our combo." Eyebrow twitching in annoyance, Naruto kicked up a piece of ice the size of a marble before swatting it towards the announcer's box with a casual looking flick of his wrist.

"I don't know about you folks but I'm-" A soft 'thunk' echoed over the speakers when the lump of ice clocked the announcer right in the middle of the forehead, making his assistants/personal cheerleaders gasp as he stumbled back out of view. "…Seeing daylights… and daisies… oh what a wonderful…"

"…Nice shot," Eva whistled lowly in approval, unable to help but smirk when another 'thud' rang out followed by worried murmurs indicating the man had fallen unconscious. "You do realize that you could get penalized for that, right?"

"That's assuming anyone actually notices." Naruto retorted cheekily, jabbing a thumb at the still roaring crowd who had been so caught up in their cheering and booing respectively to even notice that the announcer had been knocked out. Well, that or they were just as tired of hearing his voice as Naruto was, it could honestly be either way.

"Fair enough," The archer muttered with a shrug as she retrieved her shield before almost immediately tossing it aside when she saw that the front had been shredded apart. She then hooked an arm with the whiskered blonde and made her way back to the rest of the team with him in tow, a small smirk forming on her lips as her ear twitched. "I'd suggest you don't push your luck any further though, it sounds like the competition is actually trying to throw the book at us for once."

"Come on man, there is no way that move was legal! They left the Arena for Sacrier's sake!" Sure enough, back at center field a very annoyed Kriss yelled at the referee while he flipped through an extremely dusty looking rulebook. After several moments of frantic reading though, the gobbal riding man simply snapped the book back shut and shrugged with a nervous smile, making the leader of Lamechester gain a large tic mark. "Don't give me that! I want answers!"

"You're wasting your time Kriss," Naruto cut in, getting everyone's attention to snap to him and Eva as they reached the center. "While it is true that a player cannot pass the boundary lines of the game field there is no rule on how high above the field they can go, ergo that move was legal and you're still losing."

Scoffing, Kriss shoved the ref away and crossed his arms. "Don't get so cocky kid, you got lucky, a few fancy loopholes doesn't mean jack to a real gobbowler."

"Ah yes, because a real gobbowler doesn't care about rules, do they? It's no wonder why you can't beat me." Naruto retorted with a smirk, not even blinking when the Sacrier got right up in his face.

"And what the hell is that supposed to mean newbie?"

"Do I really have to spell it out for you?" The ancient shinobi asked back rhetorically which caused his opponent to get even redder in the face. Before the standoff could continue though, Kriss was forced to reluctantly step back when the Ref signaled for the players to get into position for the next playoff.

However, due to how focused he was on Naruto, Kriss never noticed Eva whispering something to Dally while getting a spare uncharged shield, earning herself a confused look from said Iop before he nodded with a thumbs up. As the players paired off, it became apparent that the terrain advantage wasn't the only thing Lamechester had lost when Calbien squared against a battered Benji and Dally found himself without an opponent at all. The reason why was due to Jay standing off at the sidelines completely unmoving and unresponsive even as an Eniripsa lady repeated smacked him with a giant brush.

"Well it'd be no fun if I just up and gave you the answer right away so here's a hint instead," Naruto started while the ref readied the ball. "I haven't broken a single rule since we started playing."

'What?' That was all Kriss had time to think before the round started and Naruto suddenly grabbed his arm.

"Dally! Hit me!" Keeping a firm grasp that stopped the Sacrier from escaping, the whiskered blonde spun around and raised his free arm protectively. Not a moment too soon either as Dally smashed into him with his shield, its charge knocking Naruto back into Kriss hard and sending them both tumbling back.

Skipping across the field several yards, the latter learned firsthand what it was like to be Eva's shield as the former used him as a buffer until they finally skid to a stop about halfway to Lamechester's goal.

"Thanks for the lift, again." Naruto said cheekily while flipping back to his feet and rushing back into the game, leaving Kriss half buried in dirt and ice.

Meanwhile, Eva grabbed Calbien and tossed the sprinter at the still airborne ball before deftly rolling under Monty when he tried to flatten her. Stopping behind him in a crouch, she rammed her new shield into his unprotected back, causing him to eat dirt as he toppled over.

"Toot!" Calbien shouted out once he got the ball, tossing it over to the floaty wearing Iop who was sprinting towards the goal with Jeremy hot on his trail.

"And where do you think you're going ugly?" Or at least he had been until Naruto cat called from the side, causing the blocker to see red and change direction towards him instead. However, rather than meeting the charge head on the whiskered blonde pointedly slammed into the left side of the buff Iop's shield. This caused all of Jeremy's momentum to shift to the right and sent him blindly crashing into a still recovering Monty.

With only Benji left in play as his teammates struggled to regain their bearings, it was child's play for Toot to score yet another point for Real Gobbly.

"Eh-hem, and y-yet another amazing goal by R-Real Gobbly folks, bringing the s-score to 7-1. They sure k-know how to keep rolling out the punches, h-huh folks?" A softspoken feminine voice called through the speakers hesitantly after the goal was made as one of the announcer's assistants shyly peeked out from his booth, clearly not used to being the main speaker. "With some spende… spendali… with some a-amazing teamwork Real Gobbly c-continues to widen the lead while Lamechester is left in ruins in their wake."

'Damn! We're getting trashed out here!' Kriss mentally swore once he finally managed to pull himself free of the ground, dusting himself off as he glared daggers at Real Gobbly, especially the blonde bastard that had left him in the ground in the first place. A low growl escaped his lips and a hunk of ice shattered in his grasp when said blonde noticed his glare and responded by waving back cheekily. 'Not broken a single rule my ass, he must have bribed the ref.'

That was the only thing he could think of that made sense to the shaggy-haired leader of Lamechester. There was absolutely no way that any of the blonde's crazy antics could have been legal otherwise, they just weren't the way of Gobbowl.

'Well you best enjoy your victory now punk, it'll just make me look all the better once I kick you ass in the last quarter,' Kriss thought with a hidden smirk once Naruto looked away, chuckling under his breath as he thought of his team's 'trump card'. 'All according to plan.'

With that last thought he schooled his features back to their previous 'enraged' state while going to help Monty and Jeremy back to their feet, making sure to yell at them extra hard for their 'failure'.

-End Chapter-