A/N: Serious non-con and violence warnings for this chapter.
"Babygirl" Morgan opened the door, arms spread wide and welcoming.
"Oh, my chunk of chocolate heaven." Garcia grinned, enthusiastically hugging her friend tightly making a small growling noise as she did so.
Morgan stepped back to allow her entry to his hallway.
"Come in, Mama."
"Don't mind if I do." Suddenly she stopped. "Oh! I almost forgot!"
She stepped back outside the door and picked up a large hamper, presenting it to Morgan with a huge grin.
Morgan laughed, totally bemused.
"Babygirl, you do know Reid hasn't even touched the ones you already got him yet."
"Well, so much for the perceptiveness of profilers," she quipped. "This is for you. See? Beer." She pointed.
"Oh well in that case, keep 'em coming." He smiled, genuinely touched by the gesture.
She looked pleased with herself. Morgan closed the door taking the hamper from her.
Garcia watched him quietly inspect the hamper with a small smile on his face. She noticed it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"So, what's a girl gotta do to get a drink around here?" She nudged him playfully.
"Fancy a beer?" Morgan nodded to the hamper with a grin.
"Sure thing, stud muffin."
Morgan led the way towards the living room, putting a finger to his lips and nodding towards Reid asleep on the couch.
Garcia popped her head round the door frame and Morgan could swear he saw her heart melt.
"Aww, my sweet boy genius." She whispered over the sound of the TV, soft eyes taking in his sleeping form. "Oh, I just wanna smush him all up." Desperate to go over and give him a big hug, she resisted, taking a few more seconds to enjoy the sight of him sleeping peacefully, then followed Morgan through to the kitchen.
She closed the door behind her.
"It's good to see he's sleeping."
"Yeah, five hours now. He's not moved, even with the TV on. I've had to check him a couple of times just to make sure he's still breathing." Morgan huffed out a laugh.
Garcia looked at him sympathetically.
"He's okay, Derek." She said reassuringly.
"He's exhausted." Morgan said, sitting down on one of the stools at his kitchen worktop. Garcia followed suit opposite him and gave him an appraising look.
"He's not the only one." She noted.
Morgan understood her meaning and uncomfortably pulled out two beers from the hamper, handing one to Garcia. He ran a hand down his face.
"I'm fine." He answered with a slight sigh.
"Taking a leaf out of the Dr. Reid play book, are we?" She said pointedly.
It wasn't even worth trying to hide his feelings from Garcia. As far as she was concerned, he was a book she'd read many times from cover to cover.
"It's never been that convincing when he says it, even less when it comes from you." She said with a small smile and a knowing look. "You can't take care of him without taking care of yourself first."
Morgan took a sip of his beer and nodded. His gaze then dropped down to the table, concern flooding his features.
"I'm not sure I can do this."
"Do what?" Garcia looked worried.
"What if I've bitten off more than I can chew here, Penelope?"
"With that perfectly chiselled jaw? Unlikely." She responded, taking a swig of her drink.
Morgan let out an amused breath but didn't smile.
"None of this is going to be easy, Derek." She said gently.
"I don't expect it to be easy. I just…." He searched for the right words. "...really don't wanna make it worse."
"And how do you think you could possibly do that? You're his best friend."
"Yeah and that's all well and good, but when he flips out I may as well be a stranger to him."
Garcia scowled. "Flips out?"
"Yeah, I mean, he just loses it and I don't know what to do. It was okay in the hospital, he was secure, but here, where it's just me and him…. it terrifies me, Garcia."
"Derek, he's only been home this afternoon."
"Yeah and I've already made a complete mess of it." His eyes flashed angrily,
"Now, this isn't the Derek Morgan I am used to. Where is all that confidence and bravado you know I love so much?"
"I think I left in the bathroom with the top layer of Reid's skin." He remarked, miserably.
Garcia gave him a curious look. "Huh?"
Morgan waved her concern away, taking another sip of his drink.
"Nah-uh. Spill." She said, staring hard at him.
Morgan closed his eyes for a few moments, wishing he'd never said anything.
"I messed up, okay? I fell asleep when he was in the shower and by the time I woke up he'd scrubbed himself damn near raw."
"Oh." Garcia said sadly.
"But the worst thing was, I was that frustrated that I pretty much manhandled him out of there and into another room." Garcia looked at him softly. "Honestly, I was that annoyed with what he'd done I felt like I could have hurt him myself and it would have been so easy to do." He shook his head, disgusted with himself.
"But you didn't." Garcia said simply. It wasn't a question.
"No… no of course I didn't. But god, I was so angry." He put his forehead in his hand, still shaking his head in disbelief.
Garcia reached out to him. "You were scared. There's abigdifference."
Morgan's eyes welled up.
"I can't stand to see him hurt himself like that, Penelope. Not after everything Jason has done to him. I'm meant to be helping him to heal. Not letting him injure himself."
Garcia squeezed his hand.
"And that, mon ami, is the reason why you can do this."
Morgan furrowed his brows at her.
"Because you love him. You love him sooo much that the thought of him hurting causes you pain. Losing him terrifies you."
Morgan's face crumpled in upset.
"And I don't know about you, but if I was in Reid's position, that's the sort of person I would want by my side." Her eyes were welling up now too.
Morgan quietly let a few tears fall.
She continued. "You don't have to be perfect. There will be times where you want to hug him, hide him away, take care of him. Then there will be times where you want to slap him and just shake some sense back into that huge ol' brain of his." Morgan winced, unable to bear even hearing it.
"It's not going to be easy." She re-emphasised. "His head doesn't know what it's doing sometimes. His mind is stuck in a trauma, it's shock. It won't always be like this."
"I know." Morgan nodded, his face scrunched up in disgust. "But I was so scared I was gonna do something stupid today, Garcia. If I lashed out, he would never trust me again. I'd never forgive myself."
"You won't." She said with complete certainty.
"How do you know that?"
"Because I know you, Derek Morgan. You are the strongest and bravest person I know. You would never do anything to him. You would hurt yourself before you would hurt him."
Morgan looked her deep in the eyes. She smiled back at him.
"But don't hurt yourself." She added quickly. "Or I will hurt you." She planted a serious stare on him, Morgan laughed. "And I may look all cute and cuddly, but I swear, under all this ooey-gooey exterior there is a stone cold monster just waiting to-
"Thanks Babygirl. You have no idea how much I needed to hear that."
She stood and moved around the counter, wrapping her arms tightly around him.
"Anytime, sugar." She gave him a kiss on the top of his head. "I think we all need each other right now."
Garcia squeezed him tighter and he squeezed back. They took solace in the silent contemplation and comfort. Loosening the hug, Garcia stepped back a little to look at him.
"Now that's enough of that." She said, wiping Morgan's cheek free of tears. She moved back around the counter and sat down. "What movie are we watching?" She said with a cheerful grin, wiping her own tears away.
Morgan huffed out an amused breath, taking a sip of his beer.
"Lady's choice."
"Good answer." She put her finger to her lip as if deep in thought. "Sherlock Holmes."
Morgan nearly spat out his beer.
"You do realise that Reid is asleep? You can watch anything you want."
She reached into her bag and pulled out a DVD. Morgan looked at it curiously.
"Robert Downey Junior - Sherlock Holmes" She said with a swoon. "Tell me a character that isn't made better by his oh so delicious presence."
Morgan smiled.
"Okay, I can go for that. As long as it's not some stuffy old white guy with a flat cap, flasher coat and pipe, I'm game…. You just better hope Reid doesn't wake up."
Morgan was settled back in his chair, beer in hand and Garcia was snuggled into the couch next to Reid's feet. A bowl of popcorn sat on top of the blanket covering her.
"See? Not what you were expecting right?" She whispered to Morgan.
"Okay babygirl, you win." He gestured a congratulations with his beer.
Suddenly both their eyes were drawn to the couch as Reid shifted awake. He rubbed his hand to his eye and made a little moan. Turning onto his back, he felt his feet touch something, he looked down to find Garcia staring back at him.
"Morning, sleepy head." She said cheerfully.
"Oh, hey." He shifted to sit up, yawning as he did. "I didn't know you were here." He said, apologetically.
"Good sleep?" Morgan asked, pausing the movie.
"Yeah. How long was I out?"
"About six hours."
Reid looked surprised.
"You looked super comfy." Garcia smiled, choosing to ignore the redness of his skin and the new grazes. She held out the bowl towards him. "Popcorn?"
Reid shook his head.
"Um, no thanks." He looked curiously at the TV. "What are you watching?"
Morgan and Garcia looked at each other. Morgan held up his hands refusing all responsibility for this conversation.
"Erm, Sherlock Holmes."
Reid quirked an eyebrow at the TV and then looked back to Garcia.
"Robert Downey Jr's Sherlock Holmes." She clarified.
Reid's eyebrows furrowed. Morgan watched him carefully.
"Okay." He said, shifting to make himself comfortable and get a better view of the television.
Morgan and Garcia shared a look, she looked slightly smug.
"You sure you wanna watch this Reid?" Morgan asked, not quite believing what he was seeing.
"Whilst it does take some creative liberties with the character in focusing more on his physical abilities, it's not entirely inaccurate. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle wrote that Sherlock Holmes was a highly skilled boxer and schooled in the Japanese fighting style of Baritsu. There is also some loyalty to his intellectual qualities. His deductive and logical reasoning skills remain largely in tact along with his ability to observe at a level most people cannot. The story itself just has more of a focus on the action-based elements than other representations. It's not a bad interpretation of the character, as long as you see it as that; An interpretation. Plus, it has Robert Downey Jr." He said with a shrug of the shoulder as if that explains everything.
Garcia grinned.
"You know Robert Downey Jr?" Morgan appeared bemused.
Reid looked at him like he'd dropped off another planet.
"Yeah, he's Iron Man."
"YEAH he is!" Garcia laughed extending her hand out to Reid for a low-five.
Reid looked at her hand curiously. After a slight pause he extended his hand to Garcia's and tentatively rested it in her palm.
Closing her eyes, she snorted a little in delight. Gripping his hand, she leaned over and kissed it. Reid's cheeks flushed, realising he had clearly misunderstood something.
"Oh you, don't you ever change."
She turned to look at Morgan and he smiled, shaking his head in amusement.
"Okay, you wanna start over?"
"Please – If you don't mind." Reid shifted again, this time a little closer to Garcia. She placed the bowl of popcorn between them and watched happily as Reid took a few.
"Hand wipes for the good doctor are on the table." She said, knowing that before long Reid would no doubt want to clean his hands.
"Thanks." He said, taking a handful of popcorn this time.
Garcia looked to Morgan and could see he was smiling to himself. This time it reached his eyes.
"Morning!"
Prentiss stood at the door holding three coffee cups.
"Ah, Emily Prentiss, you're a god send." Morgan smiled, inviting her in.
"Yeah, don't ever forget it." She smirked, entering the house.
He led her through to the kitchen where she placed the cups down and handed one to Morgan.
"How are you doing? I heard you had a good time last night." She smiled knowingly.
"Oh yeah." He smiled back.
"Who would have guessed that the sensible Dr. Reid was a secret Downey Jr fan?" She said, a hint of scandal in her voice. Garcia had obviously been talking.
Morgan shrugged his shoulders with a laugh.
"Learn somethin' new everyday." He said in jest, taking a sip of his coffee.
"So, how have you been? I haven't seen you for a few days." She sat down on one of the stools.
"Yeah, okay. It's tough, but just taking it day by day." He said nonchalantly. More than aware of Garcia's inability to keep a conversation private.
"And, how's Reid?" She asked gingerly.
"You know, he's actually doing okay. I know he's dreading today, but he's putting a brave face on it." Morgan looked sympathetic.
Prentiss huffed in amusement.
"That makes two of us then." She took a sip of her coffee.
"Hey, I thought I heard you." Reid came walking in slowly through the kitchen door. His limp seemed to be massively improved but his bruises were still way too dark on his pale skin. Though they had shrunk somewhat as the edges were starting to turn a sickly shade of yellow.
"Reid! So good to see you. I brought you coffee." Prentiss said with a smile pushing the cup towards him.
He took a seat on the stool opposite Emily.
"Oh, thanks." He said gratefully with a small smile.
Prentiss hadn't seen Reid in days, not since his episode of catatonia at the hospital. So to see him walking around, dressed in a shirt and trousers like he normally would was more than a relief to her.
"How are you?" She asked softly.
"I'm fine." Reid answered with his usual word that could mean anything from falling to pieces to actually fine. "Not looking forward to this." He said, feigning amusement.
Morgan put a supportive hand on his shoulder.
"I'll be here for you and Morgan will be just outside the door the whole time." Emily said, reassuringly. Her voice soft and sympathetic.
Reid just nodded, feeling nauseous. He picked up the coffee, his hands betraying his calm exterior with a small shake.
"Thanks." He said meekly.
The door bell rang. Reid's shoulders slumped a little and his eyes closed, clearly trying to remain calm. Morgan and Prentiss looked at each other, a feeling of dread setting in.
"Do you guys wanna get settled in the living room and I'll get that." Morgan said, heading towards the front door.
Reid's eyes were still closed. Prentiss stood, reached her hand to his arm and rubbed soothingly.
"Come on, Reid." She said kindly. "Let's get this over and done with."
He opened his eyes and nodded.
Reid sat on the couch, arms crossed tightly around him watching as the unfamiliar agent pressed record on the tape in the middle of the table.
"This is SSA Nicholas Field of the FBI's Human Trafficking Task Force." He looked to Reid. "Please confirm your name for the tape."
Reid cleared his throat.
"SSA Dr. Spencer Reid of the FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit."
Nick looked to Emily.
"SSA Emily Prentiss of the FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit, present only to observe."
"Dr. Reid. Please confirm you consent to the recording of this interview and understand that any information disclosed today will be kept confidential and classified only to be distributed on a strictly 'need to know' basis."
Reid nodded.
"Yes, I consent and understand." His arms tightened around him nervously.
"I am here to take your statement of what happened during your captivity with Jason Turner from August 21st 2011 to August 23rd 2011. I need you to try to remember as much as you possibly can. I know this will be extremely difficult so if you need to take a break at any point then let me know."
Reid furrowed his brows.
"Do you not need to start from the beginning?"
Prentiss shifted uncomfortably.
"No." Confirmed Nick. "I already have a report covering that period of your captivity and there is, um, a tape in evidence."
Reid's eyes opened wide and he looked at Nick who avoided his gaze and cleared his throat. Prentiss looked irritated; He had promised not to mention that until a later point.
"I want to start with what you remember when you left the hospital on August 21st. Can you remember what happened?"
Reid's cheeks flushed.
"I received a note and photograph saying that he had taken Morgan-"
"Yes, I am aware of that. I need you to start with what you can remember when you left the hospital. Did you get into a vehicle? Were you hit?"
"Oh, sorry." Reid's fingers dug into his arms. "I, uh, don't know what happened when I left the hospital. All I remember is walking out of the door of the E.R. and the next thing I knew, I was in the basement."
"Were you drugged?" Nick pressed.
"I don't know."
"When you woke up, did you feel like you had been drugged?"
Reid rocked himself slightly. "I- I don't know. I don't think so.
"How about your head? Did you feel like you had been hit?"
"I honestly don't know. I have tried to remember but there is nothing. My head was already hurting so it was hard to know if there was any difference." Reid said, frustrated and disappointed with himself.
"Dr. Reid, I really need you to think back. Whatever method was used to take you could have been used to take other victims."
Reid rolled his eyes.
"Don't you think I know that? I have tried, there is nothing."
Nick's lips tightened.
"Okay." Turning the page on his notepad, he continued. "I need you to close your eyes for me." He said gently.
Reid clearly didn't want to but nodded nervously and obeyed.
"When you woke up, what could you see?"
Reid licked his lips. "A basement. There was a chair in the corner of the room and the door was shut. That's all I could see."
"And where were you in the room?"
Reid's eyebrows furrowed unhappily. "In the middle of the room….. There were, um, chains from the ceiling. They were round my wrists."
Prentiss swallowed.
"Was anyone there with you?" Nick asked carefully.
"I didn't think so at first but he, um, came up behind me."
"Jason?"
"Erm, yes. Jason - Jason Turner."
"Was he saying anything?"
"I – I was looking for Morgan." Reid's face creased as he took himself back to the painful memories.
"Dr. Reid, I know this is difficult, but whatever you can remember about the things he said and did would be extremely helpful."
Reid put the heels of his hands to his eyes and was breathing deeply.
"Reid, I'm here." Prentiss said softly, putting her hand to his back.
Taking a couple of deep breaths, Reid put shaky hands down to his lap and tipped his head back a little, seemingly allowing memories to wash over him.
Swallowing, he began.
"Oh Spence – Where is he? What have you done with him? - I can't believe you're back here with me – Where is he? - Where's who? - You know who you son of a bitch – Am I supposed to have done something?" Nick was looking incredibly confused. "Morgan, where is he? - For a genius, you really are stupid-"
"Woah, woah, hold up." Nick interrupted holding up his hand.
Reid breathed out a breath of frustration. It was hard enough to go back to this place as it was without being interrupted. Reid didn't open his eyes. If he did, he might never willingly go back there again.
Prentiss squeezed his arm in support.
"I appreciate what you are trying to do. I need as much information as you can give me. But please, take your time. Accuracy is much more important that quantity. Please, if you don't remember something, then don't try to fill in the blanks."
Prentiss noticed Reid's hands ball into fists. She never understood how this worked with Reid, but she assumed it was like playing a tape. If he paused, then he would remain where he was until play was hit again.
"He has an eidetic memory." She clarified on his behalf so he didn't have to break away.
Nick huffed out a skeptical laugh.
"Okay, well good memory or not. I need this to be accurate."
"No, I don't think you understand." Prentiss countered, getting irritated now. "What you are getting here is as good as transcripts."
Nick looked at her in disbelief.
"That's not possible."
Before Prentiss could speak again, Reid opened his eyes and turned to the agent.
"Good morning, my name is Agent Nicholas Field. I am in charge of the FBI's Human Trafficking Task Forces in Pittsburgh and Norfolk. You must be Dr. Reid. And Agent Prentiss. I wish we were meeting under better circumstances. How are you feeling Dr. Reid? - Fine – As you know I am here to take your statement today regarding the incident with Jason Turner. Are you okay to chat with me today?"
Nick stared as him in complete shock, his mouth dropped open.
"Yes – I have been informed that Agent Emily Prentiss will be sitting in with-"
"Okay, stop, stop." He held up his hand, not quite believing what he had just heard. "That was our conversation earlier." Reid nodded. Emily just smirked. "Word for word." He shook his head.
"As good as transcripts." Emily reiterated.
"Okay fine." Nick conceded. "But I will need to stop you throughout to ask you questions."
Reid breathed out sadly. He had hoped that if he could just robotically reel off the conversation he would get through this.
"Okay?" Nick leaned towards Reid.
"If you want Reid I can squeeze your hand when you need to stop?"
Reid turned to Prentiss and nodded. The look in his eyes broke her heart. He looked like he just wanted to curl up and die.
Nick sat back in his chair. "Okay, take a deep breath and carry on."
Reid continued with Prentiss holding his hand for support.
"Nice try BAU… but I'm afraid… you lose."
Reid heard Jason dragging the camera tripod into the corner of the room.
His body could not stop shaking despite his exhaustion. He was sure he was going into shock. Jason had, without a doubt, broken more of his ribs and he was pretty sure his lung had been punctured during the last beating. It was incredibly painful, especially stretched out across the bed as he was.
"That was good, Spence. Very emotional."
He felt the bed dip next to him as Jason sat down. He tensed as a finger ran up the inside of his thigh. By now, Jason's touches were starting to burn. He was beyond overstimulated.
He felt the weight lift off the bed and heard Jason's footsteps walking across the room. He heard the door open and close, then all was silent.
Reid froze up, listening carefully for any signs of movement. After a minute or so, he risked calling out.
"Jason?" His chest wheezed and he coughed, hard. He could feel a trickle of thick warm liquid on his lip, slipping down the side of his face. Blood. Under normal circumstances that realisation would concern him, but now he could only hope that his injuries might mercifully kill him before Jason could. And that thought was soberingly depressing.
Breathing out a shuddering breath, Reid let his mind wander, too exhausted to do anything else.
He felt a weight on top of him, his chest felt like it was being crushed.
"That's it, wake up Spence." Jason was lay right on top of him, his tongue at his ear. Reid slowly realised he must have passed out. He could feel the cool air all over his body and his gown up by the side of his face. Jason's clammy hand was running up and down the side of his body.
Reid turned his head with a moan.
Jason bit his ear.
"Don't go anywhere just yet." He pulled Reid's face towards his giving him an invasive kiss. Reid barely responded, his head was swimming.
He felt Jason's hand creeping down his body and gripping between his legs again. Reid didn't make a noise but he pushed the side of his face into the mattress.
Jason's firm grip started stroking him up and down, his breath heavy in Reid's ear.
"We've still got fun to have, Spence." Jason whispered, licking the side of his blood covered face.
Reid broke out into a hacking cough, groaning as shooting pains encased his chest. Jason grabbed his face again.
"Not feeling very well?" Jason asked with amusement, watching as Reid's chest heaved up and down. "I must have kicked you a little too hard." Letting go of Reid's face and still stroking him, he pushed his fist into Reid's side.
Reid cried out miserably, trying to roll his body sideways away from Jason.
Despite Jason's ministrations, Reid's body was no longer responding to his touch. Exhaustion and pain had completely overwhelmed his senses. Frustrated, Jason started biting down his chest.
"Stopped getting hard for me, Spence?" He kept moving down his chest, sucking, licking and biting until he took him into his mouth.
Reid whimpered, a shudder running up his back, goosebumps covered his arms and legs. Jason worked hard to coax Reid's body to respond. After a few minutes, he got his wish.
"That's it, Spence. That's it."
He replaced his mouth with his hand and started pumping away again.
Jason watched the heavy rise and fall of his victim's chest and the shudders that ran through his body with every pump of his hand.
"Stay with me… stay with me."
He pushed Reid's blindfold off his eyes and Reid squinted at the light.
"There you are." Jason said, sickeningly softly. "Not going to cry for me? Just a little whimper?"
Reid clenched his eyes shut, trying to block out Jason in anyway he could. His body and mind were finally breaking.
As Jason could feel Reid coming close to his climax he clamped down on his throat tightly. Reid's eyes shot open and his body started automatically fighting against his chains.
"They say…" He squeezed harder. "Breath play can make an orgasm more intense." He pumped faster and faster still squeezing Reid's neck tightly. Spots were starting to dance in front of his eyes, the panic was shattering. Jason quickly released his throat allowing him to take a panicked breath and then clamped down again.
Suddenly Jason felt Reid's body violently shudder as he came. Jason held onto his neck for a couple of seconds longer until the waves of climax subsided.
Reid took a loud, hoarse breath into his body, making him cough again. Turning onto his side as much as he could, he tried to recover. He was in agony now, his whole body shaking violently.
Jason rubbed his back comfortingly. Reid wasn't sure how much longer he could stay conscious for. The darkness was crawling into the edges of his vision and he welcomed it, hoping it would swallow him up entirely.
"Kill me." His hoarse voice forced out.
Jason climbed off the bed and knelt down next to his face.
"What was that, Spence?" He said with a smile.
"Kill me." His broken voice whispered again, before unconsciousness blissfully took him.
His next memories were blurs. He went in and out of the darkness. The darkness was comforting and safe. The light was full of pain and misery. His awareness was sliding away.
He slipped in and out of consciousness for some time, not fighting it. Hoping that each time he entered the darkness, he wouldn't come back out again.
His first moment of actual awareness found him on his knees with the side of his face pushed into the mattress andarms held behind his back. Jason was thrusting and moaning behind him.
Jason's hand stroked Reid's hair.
"Welcome back." Jason moaned.
As Reid's awareness returned fully, he realised that the only chain still in place was the collar around his neck. He had clearly been unconscious for a while.
As Jason reached his climax he let go of Reid's arms and pulled his hips back. Reid's arms flopped down either side of him onto the bed unable to put up any kind of resistance.
When Jason was finished he pushed Reid forwards, shoving him away like a piece of garbage. His head and arm hung lifelessly off the bed. In Reid's blurred vision, he saw Jason's pants on the floor beneath him.
"No more now, Spence." Jason sat down on the end of the bed, his back to Reid. "No more." Turning to look at him, he rubbed a hand up and down his calf in what appeared to be a comforting gesture. He then stood, moving over to Reid's side. He lifted his hanging head by the chin. Reid's eyes were lidded and glazed.
"Thank you for an incredible time." The words sounded odd and hollow.
Jason was now detached. Ready to do what needed to be done. Kissing Reid on the lips one last time, he flipped him onto his back like a rag doll, put his hands to his throat and began to squeeze.
Automatically Reid's hand came up to his throat to try and loosen the grip, the other grasped desperately at the side of the bed.
Jason was staring right into his eyes as he squeezed tighter, wanting to watch the life leave his victim's body.
Suddenly the grip loosened on Reid's neck and Jason's eyes were filled with shock. Reid's hand had successfully managed to locate the knife he had slipped under the mattress no more than two minutes before and jammed it into Jason's neck.
Reid stared up at him wide-eyed as he watched the blood pour from the side of his attacker's neck and desperate hands tried to salvage the leaking jugular.
He lifted himself off the bed in a dazed panic, his throat gurgling. He tripped over Steve's body and fell to his hands and knees. He crawled towards the wall and rested his back against it, no longer feeling able to control his extremities as the blood emptied from the ghastly wound.
Adrenaline was now pumping through Reid at a dangerous rate. He sat up, his hands searching around for anything to throw at him in a fury. Finding only Jason's pants on the floor he launched them at him, crying out in pain as he did so. Wrapping his arm around his chest he laughed madly as he watched the light leave Jason's eyes and they slipped closed. Still laughing he fell backwards onto the mattress, his laugh turning into dry sobs. Turning to look at Jason he saw he was finally dead.
He let out a desperate, primal scream.
Prentiss' complexion was completely white. She held Reid's hand tightly as he concluded his account of hell. It had taken nearly nine hours, five breaks, four flashbacks and two panic attacks but Reid was finally at the end.
His account of what happened after the 'goodbye' tape had stopped rolling was the hardest to hear. She now had a specific time period to slot those experiences in to. She knew what she was doing in those moments and now she knew exactly what he had been doing too.
Reid had provided more detail than she had ever expected of him. For that, she was proud of him. But there was a worrying detachment in how he told his story; As if it had happened to someone else and not him. She supposed it was the only way he was ever going to get through it without becoming lost in the memories for all eternity.
After a while she found herself having to do the same thing. When he had his first flashback, she had panicked, unable to rid herself of the horrific images her colleague had described, becoming desperate to pull him away from them.
Morgan had come in to help bring him out of it and at that moment, Prentiss had decided to emotionally detach too, telling herself this was an account from a stranger. Whilst still horrific, it became a lot easier to hear when she didn't allow herself to picture the image of Reid's face along with it. Morgan had tried to remain in the room, but couldn't. Probably because of his lack of ability to detach his friend from the story.
She had expected to feel some form of relief upon learning of how Jason died. But she didn't. Perhaps it was the way Reid told it, but all she could focus on was how much he had been driven to accept and even crave death. She worried if someone's psyche could ever be fully brought back from that point. Could the association of death with comfort ever be undone? She sincerely hoped so.
Reid looked absolutely strung out. His skin was pale with dark circles under his puffy eyes, his hands shook every few seconds as if on cue. She knew how hard he had worked to keep himself grounded
The relief when Nick had told him he was finally done was palpable. The Agent had even seemed relieved. He wasn't looking too flush himself. In fact, the man looked haunted.
Prentiss had to give him his due, she wasn't keen on him when he first began. She had found him cold and robotic, but as the time had gone on, his experience in sex crimes clearly came to the fore front. He was empathetic, gentle, calm, respectful and most importantly of all, patient. He was adept at picking out important elements of the story and confidently navigated Reid back and forth between his transcripts and his actual experiences without making him feel like he was being interrupted.
She had always respected those who worked in sex crimes but this had made her look at them in a whole new light. She'd happily take serial killers any day. Selfishly, it was easier on the mind to know that the victims had usually been put out of their misery by the time she came into contact with them.
"Thank you so much for all of your help, Dr. Reid. You've done amazingly well."
Reid was now leaning back with his head resting on couch, eyes closed, still gripping onto Prentiss' hand. He squeezed every so often trying to ground himself back into the present.
Nick stood and nodded to Prentiss to indicate he was leaving. She stood, one hand still holding Reid's, the other extending out to shake Nick's.
"Thanks. Please keep us updated on any progress. The BAU is more than happy to help."
"Thanks, I'll be in touch." He looked to Prentiss' hand holding Reid's. "I'll let myself out."
She smiled. As he left she sat back down on the couch looking at her young colleague with soft eyes.
"It's over now, Spencer" She said. "You will never have to do that again."
Reid's head tipped forward, his exhausted eyes looking at her, his mouth was open slightly as he breathed heavy breaths.
Prentiss' eyes welled up.
"Can I give you a hug?" She said, her voice breaking a little.
Reid just nodded, still staring at her.
Letting go of his hand she pulled him close by his shoulders and squeezed him tightly.
"I'm so proud of you."
"I hope you don't mind, I gave him a pillow and blanket. He didn't want to go to bed." Prentiss said to Derek as she entered the kitchen.
"He seems to prefer the couch." Morgan said nonchalantly. "You okay?" He asked, inviting Prentiss to sit down. He could see how pale she looked.
"No." She said honestly.
Silence overtook them for a good minute.
"Thanks." Morgan said, staring into the mug in front of him. "I don't think I could have done that."
"At one point, I didn't think I could either." She sighed, thinking back to the conversations Reid had blankly reeled off and the number of times 'please', 'don't' and 'oh god' had featured.
Morgan looked at Emily's faraway expression and guilt swam over him.
"I'm sorry." He said gently.
She looked at Morgan, confusion dancing in her eyes.
"For what?"
"That you had to listen to that."
Emily looked troubled, shaking her head.
"Listening to it is nothing. I didn't have to live it." Her hand uncharacteristically came up to her forehead. "God, Derek. What he did to him, it's a wonder he's even still here."
"Do you wanna talk about it?" Morgan put a hand to her shoulder.
"Not right now. All I want to do is go home, have a shower and watch re-runs of Grey's Anatomy." She said with a hint of humour, standing up.
Morgan smiled in amusement, taking the hint that she was leaving. He followed her through the living room and to the front door.
"I'll call you later." Morgan spoke, the concern lacing his words.
"It's a date." Emily smiled, her protective walls pulling back up.
Morgan waved her off and closed the door, leaning his head against it. He took some deep breaths then moved to the living room.
He sat down, looking at his youngest colleague, deep in thought.
The odd twitch of Reid's limbs and whimper in his throat told him he was dreaming.
Morgan put his hand to his head. Tonight was likely to be a bad night. But he was here for him. He always would be.