She knows what Walter is going to say before he says it, standing in her doorway looking grief-stricken at the thought of telling her.
"You're going then?" Rilla looks at him, folding Ken's socks for him. A good wife always folds her husband's laundry correctly, doesn't she? At least that is what Morgan said about it.
"I am," Walter says nodding his head. "How did you know?"
"You have the same look that Ken has every time he realizes that he leaving soon for it, and leaving here tomorrow," Rilla says quietly dropping Ken's shirt to look at her brother. Tears streaked down her face, unable to control them.
"I couldn't do it, stand around doing nothing while people are dying. Innocent lives as well, Lusitania sinking by the enemy. I can't stay, I have to do my duty, just like Jem, like Ken is going to do, and It's not death I fear—I told you that long ago. One can pay too high a price for mere life, little sister. There's so much hideousness in this war—I've got to go and help wipe it out of the world. I'm going to fight for the beauty of life, Rilla-my-Rilla, I have to fight for you as well—that is my duty. There may be a higher duty, perhaps—but that is mine. I owe life and Canada that, and I've got to pay it."
"Ken says the same thing," Rilla whispers looking away.
"Of course he does, he has it in his veins, the pluck, the drive to do things greater than himself Rilla. He married you, girlie I hated him for being able to be selfless. To just make a choice and do it. I was jealous he dared to do what he thought was right, even when November came, and watching you at Christmas. His hysterical moment of worry when he thought you were injured…don't….don't be afraid of him Rilla, don't let the past tarnish a future that can be bright." Walter says with a touch of urgency that she doesn't give up on everything in her life.
They go to church all together, one last time. Walter in his khaki for the first time. Ken holds her hand, squeezing it intermittently as she listens to Mr. Meredith speak to them.
She sees Una double-take at Walter in his uniform.
"Talk to her," Rilla tells him after elbowing him lightly. "Don't leave without talking to her. I know you know, don't leave without setting the record straight whatever it may be. You owe her that much, don't lead her on. You wouldn't want that for any of us, don't do it to her."
"When did you decide this?" Walter's chest puffs lightly.
"When she's the only one who visited me after my friends weren't allowed it. We may not be best friends like Minnie and I, but she's never forsaken me like others Walter." Rilla's voice goes low and cold. "Don't give her false hope, don't lead her on."
"I won't I promise," Walter said sighing. "Ken is waiting for you," he says looking beyond her at her husband holding cups of tea for them.
Rilla only nods her head and goes to Ken, white skirts twisting around her ankles as she turns.
"What got Walter all huffy?" Ken asks quietly, kissing her hair.
"I told him to talk to Una and not leave her thinking she has a chance one day," Rilla says quietly. "She's in love with him, has been for ages and he knows it, but he constantly avoids it and her. Which should be the first clue for Una? But she is shy and never truly ever alone with him, so it never gets discussed." Rilla explains to him.
"That's very thoughtful of you," Ken says agreeing silently, before straightening slightly.
"Still around I see Kenneth, surely you must be heading back to Toronto?" Irene Howard comes to say. "Sad we won't be able to see you in uniform, you are enlisting are you not?"
"I leave tomorrow morning," Ken tells her cooly, pulling Rilla closer to him as she tries to hide slightly.
"How grown up you look these days Rilla, I barely even recognize you with your hair done up these days," Irene gushes. "All the colours you wear as well these days, one forgets you are not even sixteen yet? I saw you with Mrs. Anderson and her little one by the shore the other day as well. I couldn't help be think what a fine young mother you would make, do we have any plans?"
"I truly don't think that is anyone's business but our own Miss. Howard," Ken says sharply. "But I will agree that Rilla looks very lovely these days, I shall miss her dearly when I report for training."
"I think Mother is beckoning us," Rilla says quietly. "Thank you for the compliments Miss. Howard, and also it is Mrs. Ford if you haven't forgotten."
Rilla turns tugging on Ken, trying not to show anything but indifference. She doesn't leave his side for the rest of the day, going back to Ingleside before her parents and siblings.
They lay on her bed facing each other as if they were willing tomorrow to not come when it would when they retired that evening.
"You have everything you need, and Mom and Dad will always welcome you if you want a change of scenery," Ken tells her, hands running down the curve of her waist and over her hip. "I'll be okay, I'll come back, just you wait and see. I'll be knocking on this door. I should be able to get a lieutenant commission or something of that rank," Ken tells her.
"You don't know that, you can't promise that Ken," Rilla tells him, tears sprouting off once more. "He's taking everyone, he took Jem, Jerry, and now he's taking you and Walter. Soon Shirley and Carl will go once they can."
"There is a guarantee but I promise you that I will not go down without a fight, and I will not go without thinking of you," Ken tells her quietly.
She doesn't sleep though, and even Ken who falls asleep fairly easily is restless until he succumbs to sleep. Rilla quietly reaches across him, using the light from the moon to write something down in her journal.
Rilla puts on her bravest face, braver than even the year before dressed and ready to go as the sun rises in the morning. No one eats anything, no one says anything.
Her parents give them privacy at least, she can't say much through the tears. She promised to not cry, but she cried. At least there are no crowds like when Jem went off. She holds him tightly as his arms wrap around her, kissing her hair, before wiping away her tears.
"Don't cry Rilla, I will be back," he whispers. She can't answer him, but she kisses him, the burning heat in her stomach twisting around until she is breathless. She holds him until Walter comes to them, wanting to say his goodbyes.
The handshake is firm between the two men.
"I'll see you out there a some point," Ken tells Walter who nods his head.
"Let's not let bravery control our mind and body and think about the women folk we have at home," Walter says, in other words, don't get yourself killed and leave a widow in your wake.
"The same goes for you," Rilla says steely, eyeing the Merediths showing up, and Una. "You did speak to her did you not."
"I did," Walter says. "Not sure if it did anything but I did, can I have one last hug?" Walter asks of her.
Rilla leaves Ken's side for the moment and Walter pulls her into a hug and kisses her cheek in a brotherly sort of way.
It's another kiss for Ken as the train whistles, she watches him leave as Una comes to stand beside her. Her cheeks and eyes are red, but she says nothing as Walter kisses her cheek goodbye. She grabs Rilla's hand squeezing it.
Rilla's heart drops into her stomach fishing out the letter she had in her pocket.
Ken!
She shouts in a panic loud enough that after two times he pops his head out of a carriage, rushing to take whatever she had in her hand….the train is moving now as he grasps it with all that he can and carefully tucks it inside of his jacket.
"Rilla!" He calls out catching her attention more…" I lo—," The train whistle goes off as it pulls away.
Darling
I wanted to give this to you before you went, but felt too embarrassed by it. So I am writing this letter as you sleep beside me.
I am proud of you, never forget that. Of all that you've done for me the past year, I can never repay or say what it has meant to me. I know this was always the plan, I know that even when I think it is unfair we all have things we cannot change about ourselves, and I never want you to think I rather you be thought of as a coward to stay here for me alone.
I bought this at the seaside town, you don't have to wear it unless you wish it but it's the same size as your class ring. I hope you think of me though if you do wear it, it's nothing like you bought for me but I know men can only wear certain things in uniform and rings are one of them and according to the lady's journals and magazines men have started wearing their wedding band to show their comrades in arms that they have girls back home waiting for them.
I wish I had the guts to give you it in person, but I never could get the words out…though if you think it silly or tacky. You don't have to wear it all. It didn't cost much at all, I used my allowance savings for it and all, but I hope you like it.
Don't forget to come back to me.
Your Rilla
Ken finds taped to the bottom of the paper a gold ring...a wedding band sort of ring. He smiles wistfully and ignores Walter's look as he pulls off his class ring and slips it on. It did fit, and he doubted he would ever take it off.
