Speech = ``...´´
Thoughts = [... ]
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Surprises.
People say that they like surprises.
They laughed and giggled or just sighed with a tired smile on their lips and what kind of misdeeds would soon arrive, a mood of excitement always roamed the air when the words were mentioned among same minded peers.
After all, is it not usual to find at beginning and end of a prank that those well intentioned buffoons were always part of a group? The cackling of their young mirth always echoing all the way as they acted like children to enjoy life just like children would?
In a sense, if you blatantly disregarded the lack of brain power and that most pranksters were sometimes assholes then it was a fine way to disconnect from the perils of growing old.
However its universally known that there is a big fat lie in that statement.
One that should have been phrased differently for future generations in order to avoid someone thinking too hard on said matter one day while starting at the nothingness of a wall because they had nothing better to do.
And said correction should have been divided in two statements.
People "liked" to surprise others….
And "they" definitely hated to be the ones been "surprised"
Strange no? She had often wondered even why. Why such a controversy about something so simple? Was it not fair to be at the other end of the stick from time to time if you had no qualms of been a prankster yourself?
No..?
Oh, ok...
..
..
More or less, that was the short answer if someone had not noticed.
The long answer was that the lack of control, the lack of agency to be aware of it and what it would mean to the one caught with their pants down, sometimes literally was something that people loathed to be reminded, let alone experience at the expense of themselves for the joy of another.
Just like when the common Joe fell on their faces and the rest merely pointed and laughed at them instead of helping, making the entire experience really awkward for one side.
So...yeah, there was that.
However, when there was surprise….there was panic.
Sometimes more..
Sometimes a little less…
But it was there.
That accursed feeling of cold water splashing all over you yet lighting your blood aflame at the same time when something struck you from a left field.
A fight or flight response.
Ran away or fight.
A reaction born out of the perceived belief, either consciously or not of an imminent threat to the survival of one self quickly approaching. A last bid to DO something about what scenario in which one was whole unprepared for it before new information could be studied.
..
..
And yet….
Against all odds of probability and common sense..
She froze.
She FUCKING froze!
Her body became stuck in place as if her feet had decided on that very convenient moment to glue themselves to the polished floor like the branches of a tree.
Her entire body turning cold and rigid like stone carved into an eerily yet realistic shape of a woman who could do nothing, say nothing at the scene playing before her, gawking like a fool!
Watching the girl-no, watching Clervie of all people barge/stumble into the room and then ran up to her and throw herself at her.
Not out of fear.
Not out of hatred.
But sheer worry turned relief as her small, slender arms wrapped themselves around her waist as much as they could reach... while the girl buried her pretty little head on her stomach. Crying immediately if the muffled sound coming afterwards was anything to say about.
..
..
But... why?
WHY..!?
It hurt to see Clervie like this, but more so to know to what kind of monster she was showing so much worry for. So much love that would have never been reciprocated if the real woman had been here.
Her heart ached at the sight of the fresh bandages in her arms, just like if someone had drawn a blade through it. A feeling only made worse knowing deep down that those bruises had more than likely been done by the original owner of her body not that long ago.
Clervie deserved better.
They all did.
She tried to bit her lips, to clench her fists as she tried to come with a response, anything really to stop standing there like a mute...but could do nothing more than to feel her heart throb painfully fast inside her chest, threatening to burst out from there.
The cold sweat crawling up her back and the pain in her skull passing to a second place as she tried to stir her body to move.
However, it was a bit hard with the sheer proximity towards the source of her lack of control over her body, and the way the girl unknowingly screwed her with the way she tried to cling to her.
Her lips started to quiver with a bitter smile.
Funny, was it not? She had already come to terms with the reality she was now living in, strange as it was, and yet…., the mere sight of this girl had totally disarmed her.
To see her face.
To hear her voice.
To watch what had been once a cartoon now turned human hold her tightly.
To feel the soft, sweet scent of Lumidouce in her hair reach her. To sense the pressure of her small yet willing arms against her body, the warmth of her body pressed against her….
It had been too much.
Too much to take in such small amount of time.
Which was why she was extremely grateful that Clervie had not decided by then to raise her head and speak or ask her of anything.
Slowly, finding the strength to quell her weary heart as she reciprocated the gesture in kind. Her arms slowly tracing the air until they managed to envelope Clervie. Gently pressing her against her, wanting to let her know that she was not alone.
Not anymore...
She felt the girl flinch at the sudden presence of her touch, clearly not expecting any motherly show of affection from the likes of "her" not like she would blame her for it. However, she quickly gave in to it anyway, finding perhaps if ever briefly something that eased whatever ailed her.
Something that made this moment just a little less miserable...
She sighed inwardly, gloved hands stroking the loose strands of hair that dangled between her fingers. It was not much, nor it would ever be enough…..but it was the best thing she could give her at this very moment.
And so...they continued on like that.
Clervie didn't speak….and neither did she. Allowing her to let it all out rather than to let the girl bottle it up for later. She didn't know for how long they stood like that either. Time seemed a rather unimportant concept as long as they remained in each others embrace.
At least, it gave her time to think.., to wonder.
And there was one particular thought that nagged at her.
Why Clervie would have gone out of her way to come to Cr-to her mothers room so early at this hour? Felt rather out of the blue for a child of her age, there was also the fact that she had seem very surprised to see her awake at all.
As if she was not meant to be…
..
..
How strange.
It was only after a while that her crying stopped and she felt Clervies grip loosen up if ever so slightly. It was barely a thing, but she had been around children long enough to know what it meant.
Unconsciously she bit her lip, her eyes closing to a half lid as worry drew on her fair features. There was no more stalling it...but could she do it?
She was not proud to admit it, but she was afraid of what was going to happen next, of what could happen. It was not like there were some hidden dialogue options for her to pick through to make it better.
What if she made a mistake?
What if she made it worse..?
What if…..it was for nothing?
..
..
..
..
..
[Fuck it! There is a little girl in need of some love and you are going to stand there doing nothing!? Man up, girl! MAN UP!]
She berated herself in silence, deciding in that very moment to go all out or nothing, feeling the air fill up her lungs and her throat start to clench as a response of what she was planing to do. Not even deigning the opportunity for doubt to try to steer her hand away this time as her lips started to part ways with one another and-
``Clervie...are you feeling alright?´´
She finally heard herself say, her voice echoing softly through her lips to a point that she almost thought she had imagined it. However, the way Clervie started to slowly push her head away from her belly dissuaded her from those thoughts.
Those light green eyes slowly searching and finding her own, still tearful and reddish from crying...yet now looking at her open wide with a strange and puzzling expression that she could not fully understand.
Had she said wrong? No, not that she was aware of at least…
It was then that Clervie tried to speak, to twist her lips and say something….yet nothing barely audible came out, as if the very words themselves were scarcely willing to let themselves heard.
Realizing what it was, she slowly stroke the girls back while she started to kneel so that the two could be on the same eye level, not willing to force the girl to tilt her head up just to meet her mothers glare anymore.
Her long stilted skirt and cape softly and luckily for her shifting to accommodate her movement.
``Just breath in and out, ok dear? I know that sometimes it gets hard to speak after this...as if your throats gets clogged out and your words get stuck there, but is ok...just take your time´´
She muttered kindly, offering a gentle smile as she waited patiently for the girl to make her choice at her own pace. It was not long before she was watching her open her mouth and close it as she breathed in and out.
Clervies quivering lips were now gone, just as the tears that had left their mark on the pretty girls face were. Her nose was still red and she would need a handkerchief to clean herself...but it was an obvious upgrade from what she had looked before.
[Baby steps I guess…]
She thought to herself, slowly allowing her own arms to slid down Clervies back and head, releasing her almost fully from her grasp, yet keeping at least a minimum of contact by holding those lithe arms with her own gloved fingers.
``Are you feeling better...?´´
``...´´
``Clervie? Are you alright..?´´
``...´´
``Clervie?´´
``A-y-yes! I am feeling better mother..´´
Her dau-the pink haired girl responded with all due haste, rapidly shaking her head from whatever thoughts had been plaguing her mind, almost comically as her bubbly personality once started to resurface up again.
A similar reaction to that time when a certain white haired girl reminded her that spiders don't eat cake.
However, she didn't notice that quizzical expression still behind those eyes that shone so much like her as she sighed in relief. It really put her mind a little more at ease to see her back to be the kind and joyful girl that she was.
She also really looked cute when she smiled…..which was a bonus in her opinion.
Yeah, she really needed that camera idea rolling down the moment she got her chance. She would have tons of m- of "innocent" photos of these girls no matter what.
``That's good to hear, do you want to sit? I am sure that you must feel tired..´´
She said, gesturing with one hand to the bed right next to her. A look of doubt appeared on Clervies face, creasing the joy she had been feeling a moment ago.
``Ah, well..I-I would not want to bother you mother´´
Was Clervies meek response, one that she could not help but blink with confusion at what she had said several times before a streak of laughter made its way through her lips.
``Bother? You? Nonsense...come on, let he help you´´
``Mother? Wait, what are yo-´´
Before the pink haired girl could say anything else, she found her words cut short when she found herself lifted from the ground with relative ease. Her small legs wailing in the air for a second or two…..before she was placed right over the bed.
The mattress creaking a little bit at the presence of a weight over its surface, but nothing else.
However while Clervie was left confused, perhaps wondering why she had insisted on making her rest on the bed though not that her body argued with that decision as she sank a little under the cushy, fluffy blankets…. a different kind of thoughts were roaming her mind.
Thoughts that were better hidden away from the world in case the end of times arrived.
Thoughts that would threaten the morals and sanity of those capable of hearing them to darkest of pits.
..
..
..
[O.M.G...she is so light and soft! Its like picking up a plushy...thats so...THATS SO ADORABLE!]
She could not help herself but feel a light of radiance glow around her as she felt lost in the warm haze that were those thoughts.
Sadly, she had to fake a cough if only to revert back to a less daydreaming self.
``Better...?´´
Clervie could only nod her head, her hands now resting on her thighs as she stared at her with those pretty eyes of hers.
``I am glad to hear that, now...Clervie, I would like to make a question to you.´´
``A...me? A question..?´´
``You don't have to answer it though. You can always say no..´´
``I...can?´´
There was no words to overstate the frown forming inwardly inside of her. What kind of mother would berate her own daughter to a point that she could no longer consider even saying no to something.
Oh right..she was Crucabena now.
That explained a lot.
``Yes…, of course..´´
``Oh…, ok. What do you want to know mom?´´
``Why were you crying?´´
And just like that, whatever warmth that she had managed to build up seemed to break around her when she saw the girls eyes flicker with a hint of realization and dread.
Like a dog who had been smiling at its owner until it saw the stick hiding behind his masters back.
An expression that should not belong in such a young face.
``S-sorry...I should not have done that, you always said that I should be a big girl and I...I-I will try to make it right mother please just- oh no...your shirt mother, I ruined it..´´
Her voice seemed to further break down as she spoke, especially at that last detail. Looking down she realized that she was speaking the truth, somewhat…given that the spot where Clervie had smothered her head was drenched with both her shed tears...and mucus.
Yeah….she was not going out of the room with this shirt already.
[Still….to lash out in anger at a child for this? How low can you get Crucabena?]
She thought bitterly, this new found revelation souring her mood. Oh how she would have wanted to have a word or two with the owner of her body.
Too bad such thing was already out of the question.
..
..
Sighing loudly she placed a hand over her daughters head, the gesture making her flinch for an instance, perhaps fearing to be hit…. only for confusion to draw in the next second when she started to pat it.
Fingers playfully stroking those smooth strands of pink hair.
``Clervie...is ok, its just a shirt..´´
``W-what..?´´
``I have many more shirts, why should I care for this one?
She was not lying, if there was one thing this woman had in ample spades after been a bitch was clothing.
``Besides, it was not your fault..´´
Clervie merely stared at her with widen eyes, it was….weird? Well, it didn't matter, as long as she was not fearing for her life or blaming herself for anything it was good in her book.
There will be time when she managed to make a more compelling argument.
``Now, will you tell me? Please...´´
``I was just so relieved to see you ok after what happened two days ago..´´
She tilted her head to the side, her brows creasing with confusion.
``Two days ago? What do you mean? What happened..?´´
``You...don't know..?´´
``Eh...I would not be asking if I did.., wouldn't I..?´´
``That….kinda makes sense..´´
``So..?´´
``You…´´
``I...?´´
``You fell and hit your head mother…´´
The world seemed to freeze in that very moment. Her eyes widening while her breath hitched in her chest like a cold shudder. The gears in her mind becoming stuck on that word..
Fell…
She had...fell?
It was a preposterous thought….
Surely she could not be right.
And yet.
``What...?´´
She croaked weakly, not even registering the fact she had spoken loud enough to be heard. Yet it seemed that it was loud enough for Clervie to take it as her cue to continue.
``You were down the stairs…, your body was bent weirdly and you were...you weren't moving´´ The girls voice started to become hoarse and weaker, her arms trembling as she continued to evoke those memories ``You looked so pale and there was so much blood... ´´
Clervie lowered her gaze then, her small hands starting to clutch at the helm of her dress, her distress growing with each passing second that she remembered of that day still fresh in her memory
``I did not know what to do, you...you were so heavy and-and...Gerard said that you may have accidentally slip off and landed hard on your head in the process. You have been asleep ever since´´
And there was where the explanation ended.
She would have loved to hug the poor girl. To whisper calming words into her ear to ease her worry that ached so terribly at her heart.
That it was all fine.
That everything was going to be fine now that she was here.
But she herself was shocked by the revelation..and the pain that came with it just like an old would aching at the change of the air temperature. Gnawing at her mind with those sharp and seething cuts now that they made themselves known again.
Cutting deep….
So deep.
She clenched her teeth, feeling that iron after taste in her tongue not soon after.
[Gods…, now it makes sense]
The skull breaking agony.
The bandages tightly wrapped around her head now drenched in cold sweat and...something else.
The reason behind Clervies honest surprise to see her up and about...and why she was now inside the body of this woman of all things.
Pieces of a puzzle that had been flying before her eyes since she had awoken, yet only now she had the sight to put them together.
And the end result was not pretty.
Still, it had to be truly horrible for someone as kind as Clervie to find her mother laying on the ground, still, pale, unresponsive….and with a small puddle of blood underneath her head, dripping down the stairs like a crimson rain..
A terrific sight.
A shocking scene.
One that would forever haunt this girls mind for years on end, perhaps never leaving her truly alone if she was unlucky.
Cruel and evil as Crucabena had been, as she would ever be…. Clervie had always cared for her mother.
That was her most kind….and damming trait.
[The thought of losing her must have scared her...]
She almost teared up on the spot, feeling that burning sting at the edges of her eyes, but did her best not to show it.
She felt tired..
She felt angry...
She felt dirty….
She felt…
..
..
..
``Mother? Are you alright...?´´
The words echoed faintly in her ears, almost like an afterthought rather than the sound of a voice right next to her, the ragged sounds of her shallow breaths echoing far louder than that.
Her body felt hot and bothered, her thoughts becoming cumbersome as black spots started to form around the edges of her sight.
``M-mother?´´
There it was again, louder and yet more shakily than ever. She tried, gods she tried...but she could not bear to look at her in the eyes.
For if she did...she did not know if she could keep herself from breaking down.
``I am... just a bit tired.´´
``But you just woke up..´´
``I know...I know. Would you mind... letting your mother some time for herself?´´
``Mom?´´
``Please...just...just do it ok, sweety?´´
She felt Clervies eyes on her for what felt an eternity instead of a few seconds, but finally she took her cue to leave the room. Not fully convinced to leave, but not wishing to bother her anymore.
Which was just in time as when the doors sealed shut and the sound of her footsteps vanished from her hearing did the blackness of unconsciousness claim her again.
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A/N
Hi, here comes another chapter, forgive me for any grammar mistakes you may find and I hope you may like it. Feel free to share your thoughts and your opinions about it, I would greatly appreciate them.
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Jock78149: I am glad I managed to write something you liked even when I don't know myself what I am doing half of the time XD.
Now, I have a lot of ideas going around, but I am bad at picking the pieces to build the house, it will take time but we may reach that point in the story. Feel free to ask any questions about the chapter or the story overall if you want. I am sure I can answer them unless I deem them as spoilers.
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Also I hope I dont rub the wrong feathers here, but if you wonder why Clervie is so sad or worry about Crucabena in this moment...you have to understand that : first she is a very kind person that could not find herself to think poorly let alone kill her "mother" after the woman had proven time and time again she was evil incarnate.
Two: the little chibi girl had just found her mother deader than a nail on the floor, it would be unlike her to either ignore or not care about that.