Authors Note: This is my first attempt at a fan fiction so be nice. I apologize if the grammar and format is bad, it's been a long time since I wrote something for fun or school, so I've almost completely forgotten how to use Microsoft Word. Also, I should note that this story is based primarily off anime lore of both series more so than the manga. Certain key points are also based off dubbed translations as well. To better consolidate the lore of the two series, certain established canon, dates, history, and even personality traits of the characters will be somewhat altered.
Chapter 1: Turtle's return and gifts.
On an island seemingly in the middle of the ocean, there was a small but comfortable looking beach house. It was two stories and painted pink with words KAME HOUSE on the front side in deep red. The sun was shining hotly despite the fact it was still mid-morning. An old man was standing on the beach, he was bald with an impressive white beard that came down to his neck. He wore sunglasses all the time and this morning was wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt, white shorts, and purple sandals. Around his neck he wore a leather necklace tied to a beautiful orange crystal like orb with three glowing red stars. But the most peculiar accessory was a large purple turtle shell he wore on his back.
He stood watching the sea not really paying attention to the waves or the sound of the gulls and dolphins chattering, as he was deeply engrossed in memories, he had not thought about for many, many years. In his minds eye he saw a young girl with short blue-black hair wearing an old-fashioned high school uniform and a stern expression chastising him. The image changed to the same girl but a bit older. This time she was wearing a happy tearful expression and a white wedding dress. Her lips seemed to beckon to him. The images kept changing, from a girl in Chinese style clothes and purple hair and then to a young woman with long brown hair and for some reason a giant spatula on her back. Suddenly it changed to a young man with a bandanna on his head, a fierce look of determination and anger on his face, then a long-haired man with thick glasses swinging a chain.
The old man let out a sigh and spoke aloud to himself, "I've lived a long time and said goodbye to many people. How sad that I can't remember their names."
A female voice spoke in his mind, "Really my love, have you gone that senile? You can't remember the names of your childhood friends or even your late wife?"
"Oh, who asked you?" The old man responded. It was true that he had forgotten most of their names at the moment, living this long certainly did have its draw backs. But he always remembered given the time to think. Over the many years of his life, he had been afflicted with a curse that caused him to take the form of a young girl when splashed with water. He had gained the ability to control the conditions of the curse so that he could transform when he wanted to. However, this required the use of a powerful magic incense that had a side effect of giving his girl half her own personality and desires. The girl half was ever present in his mind and spoke to him and often his only company.
"Come now, my love," the voice chided him. "If you were to transform and give me control, we would have the healthy young brain of a young woman, a brain that would easily remember names to the faces."
The old man snorted. "Ha, and let you rampage about the mainland until the incense wears off? I think not." He sighed again, "But still, I can't believe I outlived all of them. Even their children and grandchildren. Theirs, and mine."
The voice fell into a depressed silence, and the old man returned to watching the sea. Suddenly a moving dot appeared within his vision. It got closer and he recognized the dot as it slowly took shape.
"Ah, Turtle! I was worried about you. You've been missing for a long while now."
"Master Roshi!" cried the sea turtle. "Sorry to worry you, I was lost. It probably would have been another 30 years if not for the kindness of a strange little boy. Speaking of whom, I left him on the mainland beach with the promise I would reward him for his kindness."
"Is that so?" said Roshi. "And I suppose you meant that I would be the one to reward them?" He let out a cackle. "Very well, it has been lonely without you here. Well then, lets go!" And with that word he grabbed a wooden staff from the ground at his feet and leapt on the Turtle's back, and they slowly went out to sea.
An hour or so later of sea travel Roshi approached a small beach. He saw in the distance a small boy with spikey black hair and a tail oddly enough. Also, a pretty teenage girl with blueish hair and wearing a long pink pajama shirt. The boy with the tail sparked something in his memory but couldn't place it.
"Sorry for the wait!" said Turtle. "It was a good long swim."
"Hello there kids." Roshi said.
"Welcome ashore," said the girl.
"I'm Roshi the Turtle Hermit. Now, which one of these children helped you, Turtle?"
"That one there, master. The little boy."
Roshi walked up to the boy and said, "You're a brave and kind little boy. Turtle told me how you rescued him and defended him from that bandit. I have a gift I would like to give you".
Roshi then stepped up to towards the waves and cast held his staff aloft and cried "COME TO ME, MAGIC CARPET!"
"Wow! A magic carpet?!" the girls eyes dazzling.
The boy looked confused and asked, "What's a magic carpet?"
"What's a magic carpet?" the girl said in disbelief. "What planet are you from? A magic carpet is literally a carpet that takes you anywhere you want to go!"
They waited in silence for about 20 seconds before Turtle suddenly spoke up. "Master, you left the magic carpet at the cleaners last year, remember?
"Oh yes! You're right Turtle. I had forgotten." The voice sniggered in his mind. "Quiet you!" Roshi whispered loudly enough for the kids to hear. "What of master Korin's cloud, my love?" the voice answered.
"Hmm." Roshi said aloud. "The flying nimbus, eh? But am I ready to part with it? Oh, what the heck if you can ride it, it's yours!"
The two children seemed puzzled as it wasn't everyday you met an old timer having a conversation with himself. But they didn't walk away because they were now very interested in what the old man was going to show them.
He held up his staff again and called, "COME TO ME, FLYING NIMBUS!". And again, they waited in silence. But not for long this time, for soon they heard a whooshing sound above them. They all whirled around and saw a small yellow cloud come to a halt in front of them.
"Whoa what's that?" exclaimed the girl?
"This is the flying nimbus" Roshi explained. "If it allows you to ride it, it'll take you anywhere you want to go, and it's super-fast too!"
"It looks like kind of like a marshmallow, can I eat it?" asked the boy.
"It's not for eating you little baboon!" Roshi snapped.
"This seems too good to be real" said the girl shrewdly. "What's the catch? Is it broken? Cursed?"
"Clever girl to be suspicious of strangers in this day of age" thought both Roshi and the inner voice at once. "I guarantee you there's nothing wrong with this cloud."
"Hey! Can I try and ride it now?" exclaimed the young boy.
"Sure, but she's right, there is a small catch. This cloud is very particular. If you have impure thoughts, it won't let you ride it. Here, let an old man show you how it's done." And with that he hopped up and tried to land on the cloud butt first. Unfortunately, his butt went right through the cloud and collided hard with the ground. Roshi could barely hear his own exclamation of pain over the combined laughter of the young girl on the beach and his other half in his head.
Turtle crawled up to him to help him to his feet. "Are you alright master? I bet you did something naughty while I was away. "Bingo" said the inner voice. "Be quiet" he answered.
"My turn!" and the boy jumped up and…his feet landed solidly on the cloud. "I did it! I really did it!" and the boy started dancing upon the cloud and then taking a surfing stance, took off like a rocket. He rode the cloud like a fish in water. He did cartwheels and loop de loops. He dived down like a hawk at breakneck speed and pulled out of the dive at the last second in full control and speeded across the surface of the sea leaving a wake of water behind him. Finally, after a couple of more loops and spins he came back to a halt in front of Roshi and the girl.
"Well, I'll be darned" said Roshi amazed. "You ride that cloud like you've had it your entire life. It's good that you have it now, I'm sure you'll find better use for it. I don't travel much anymore you see." The young boy giggled and sped off to do more tricks.
"Hey! What about me? Aren't you going to give me a present too?" asked the girl.
"Hmm, what about it, Turtle? Did this girl help you too?"
"No, master, Just the boy" said Turtle while gesticulating his fin in a dismissive motion.
"And just who was it who gave you that seawater when you were thirsty on the way, huh?!" she retorted angrily.
Roshi stroked his beard and considered. "I'm afraid I may have to side with Turtle this time. However…" He looked the girl up and down and said, "I could be persuaded…if you were to let me see your underwear." "Oh boy, here we go, Happusai part 2" Groaned the inner voice.
"M-m-my underwear?" the young girl stammered horrified. "You can't be serious!"
"Master what are you saying!?" Turtle cried out. "You can't ask her that! It's not just wrong, it's against your code!"
"Oh, get off my back! Can't an old master take a break from training occasionally before he dies?"
"Now I know why you couldn't ride your cloud, master" he whispered snidely.
"Bite your tongue!" he snapped back. "And you too" he thought inwardly. The inner voice said nothing, but he could feel her burning judgement boring a hole in the back of his conscious.
Shaking the girl stepped directly in front of him. "I c-can't believe I'm d-doing this" she stammered. "Wait she's not going to really-? the inner voice said. Suddenly in a swift movement the young girl seized the end of her shirt and lifted it up and shouted "HERE!" After a few moments she put her shirt back down and turned around blushing furiously. "Gosh, I can't believe I did that."
"Me neither. What's wrong with kids these days? Oh, my eyes, I think I've gone blind" Roshi choked out. "Well, it serves you right you lech!" his inner self shouted to him. "And just early this morning you were thinking of your friends and family! What would they say if they saw you now?" Roshi looked down sheepishly, "That's harsh" he mumbled.
"Okay, so what's my present?" the girl said smiling and still blushing.
"Your present? Oh, well I have something in mind…" Roshi said. "Liar." Roshi started sweating trying to think of something to equal that unexpected treat. When suddenly the young girl noticed his necklace and excitedly shouted out.
"Hey! That necklace! Can I have that?"
"Huh? This old thing?" he said as he pulled off his necklace. "Are you certain? Sure, it's pretty, but it's just some shiny stone I found washed up on my island." He handed it to her outstretched palms, and she held it close to her eyes dazzling with excitement.
"Hey Goku!" she called to the boy which was apparently his name. The boy brought the cloud back down to a halt in front of her at eye level. "What is it, Bulma?" She held the ball up to him, "Check it out!" He took the small orb in his hands and said "Wow, another Dragonball! It has three stars! The Three Star ball!" She took it back, "What a stroke of good fortune! Four down and three to go, and then the dragon will grant out wish!"
"Huh? Dragonball? That thing's a Dragonball?" Roshi said. He had of course heard the legend of the great immortal dragon and the seven dragon balls, but he never believed in the story. "My love, his other half cooed, "If the tales are indeed real then I could have my own body." His other half was suddenly in a much more affectionate mood compared to before when she was chastising him for his pervertedness. He of course knew better then to let his other half run rampant, and he had his own ideas for a wish.
"Hold on! I never said you could have it!"
"Oh, come on!" the girl named Bulma pouted. "Please? I know, here! See, see!" she said as she began flashing him again.
The old man's nose burst with blood, and he quickly stuffed a handkerchief to his face. "Alright! Fine, take it! Mercy!"
Bulma started jumping up and down cheering with glee. After she calmed down, she expressed their gratitude and said their goodbyes. As she climbed on her motorcycle and revved up the engine she turned and called out to him, "Goodbye! We love our gifts! You're a kind and generous man!" And with that she and Goku sped away.
Roshi didn't really hear her final goodbyes as his other self was chewing him out at the top of her non-existent lungs. "Ranma, my love! How in the world after 300 years of being cursed to turn into a young girl and 60 of those years being married, did you become so weak to girl's body!?"
Roshi however had no response to that. She had invoked his original name which she only does when she's truly angry. But could he be blamed really? His wife died before he passed his first century, and some 150 years ago he mastered the separating incense for the purpose of controlling his curse and let her out rarely. Because in exchange for transforming whenever he pleased, his other half gained her own ego and although she wasn't totally evil, she did have a mean streak which bordered on cruelty if she got carried away. Plus, abstinence and discipline had been a part of his code for many years. All theses factors had finally come to a boil recently and he ended up pent up, hard up, and weak to pretty girls.
Roshi climbed on the turtle's back and headed back out to sea and sighed. "Oh, well" he thought, "Turtle came home, I made two nice kids happy, and saw an unexpected treat. That'll have to be good enough for the day." His inner self had ceased reprimanding him, but he could still sense her pouting and brooding.
Later at a capsule house a young girl screamed. "They're gone! My underwear was gone! But that means back on the beach…oh no!" Goku came charging into the house and asked what was wrong. "I found this on the floor!" she said holding up a pair white panties.
"Oh, don't worry Bulma!" Goku laughed. "That's where I left them." He stood there grinning proudly and ignorantly as Bulma turned and glowered at him.
"Are you saying you took off my underwear while I was sleeping this morning?"
"Yup" said Goku still grinning. His grin faltered a bit as he watched her load a clip into an Uzi, cock it, and point it at him face red and furious.
"Die Pervert!" and she unleashed hell as Goku panickily danced out of harms way from the onslaught of bullets.
End of Chapter 1