Chapter 15: Q&A With Erza

==That Evening==

We wound up recruiting Levy for the quest as well since Erza had realized on her second read through of the flier that Levy's near encyclopedic knowledge of ancient languages and vast skill as a polyglot would come in handy on this quest. When I asked why, Erza had declared there was an exceptionally high chance we'd be travelling abroad on this one. Fiore's actually a reasonably small country, so I don't guess I should've been as surprised as I was that wizarding jobs, especially ones as important as S-Class quests, could wind up being international affairs.

We booked a night train to the town of Thistleton in the mountains around the middle of North Fiore so that we'd have time to get packed for our trip. It hadn't taken me long since most everything I had that I would even consider taking with me fit in my Requip space, but not everybody can do that, so I wound up having about nine hours to kill. Then Mira popped in to give me 'a reason to come back safe', and that nine hours to spare turned into nine minutes before I knew any time had passed at all.

Lucy, Levy and Erza had all grinned at me knowingly as I ran up at 6:51 for our 7:00 train with my shirt on backwards and a big smile on my face. Natsu was just curious about why I smelled like Mira. Then it hit him and his jaw hit the ground, "AGAIN?! SERIOUSLY?!"

I grinned smugly, "Again. Seriously. I think that's one of the very few things I am completely incapable of getting tired of." Natsu babbled something incoherent as Happy declared me gross.

Then Erza picked me up and tossed me over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes in an instant, "Ok! Too much information, time to get on the train." I gestured cluelessly to Lucy and Levy and got a laugh as we boarded the train. I could've been upset or annoyed by the indignity of being hauled about like a piece of luggage, but there were worse things than being literally carried off by Erza.

Erza gave the train conductor her ticket, and then turned around so I could show him mine. He looked mildly confused, so I told him with a smirk, "In a fun twist on the classic story, I, the handsome hero, am being toted off by the beautiful princess for a ravishing in the royal bedchamber. Please do not interfe-WHOAHO!"

I immediately teleported halfway down the train car, blushing as red as Erza's hair with the very distinct feel of her hand still quite fresh where she'd copped a feel of my ass.

I tried to think of something clever, heck, anything clever or not, to say, and then it sank in with Lucy, Levy, Natsu and the train conductor what had just happened. Happy didn't get it, but he could tell Erza had done something and that it had embarrassed me. To call it a mere 'storm' of hysterical cackling would be an understatement. Then Erza shot me the cheekiest damn grin over her shoulder that I would never have guessed she was capable of, and a wicked grin of my own slid across my face, Oh game on Red, game on.

We pretty quickly found our way to our cabin and got our things stored away beneath the seats. Lucy and Levy had headed straight for the dining car with Happy, and that left just me, Erza and Natsu in our cabin.

"You have a delightfully sadistic sense of justice," I told Erza with a grin as I watched Natsu utterly wilt when the train started rolling.

Erza nodded, "Thank you, I do like to think I know all my guildmates rather well." She took a sip of tea with a small smile before calmly sliding the compartment door closed and locking it, "That of course brings up the fact that you're new and I don't know you very well at all. So while I would hate for Natsu to miss his punishment…"

She swapped her tea over to her right hand and immediately clocked Natsu into what I suspect was blissful unconsciousness with a lightning quick rabbit punch from her left before turning a rather disconcerting gaze on me, "I'd much rather have some privacy while I question you about your intentions regarding Mirajane. Her last steady boyfriend didn't work out well, and I didn't like seeing my best friend like that at all. So," Her friendly smile promised all manner of horrible pain and torment if I lied, "Let's talk."

Everything suddenly fell into place and I snorted with laughter a little, "So that's why you brought me. Gotta say, I find your deviousness quite cute."

Erza frowned, "Pardon me?"

I waved my hand lightly with a smile, "Come on, it's obvious! You bring me along on a dangerous quest where any or all of us could die at the drop of a hat, then you wait until we're underway to start questioning my intentions regarding your best friend so that you can bump me off on the quest and make it look like an accident if you need to. Use your reputation as being completely upright and noble to sell any lie you have to tell regarding my demise and do the stoic face pretending to be hiding your tears so you don't look weak when in reality you're just praying nobody finds out. I can only deem it an admirably devious little scheme."

"Do you really think so little of me?" Erza asked quietly as her eyes burned with indignation.

I raised an eyebrow, "Eh? Pretty sure that was a compliment to your planning skills Erza. Going by your reaction," I continued, "I'm going to guess that either you had no such plans and this questioning me is a spur of the moment thing, or you're a brilliant actress trying to throw me off the scent of the plan I just mentioned. Either way, it says favorable things about you and regardless of which it is, if your intentions are truly to simply ensure that I have nothing but the best intentions for Mira, then I have absolutely nothing to fear."

"And why is that?" Erza asked in a rather dangerous voice.

I looked at her flatly, "Because even though she's asked me not to fall in love with her, and I've been trying my damnedest not to, she is as far as I can tell a complete and utter angel who I would very much like to spend the rest of my life with. I love her," I admitted quietly, "I can't stop that no matter how much she may want me to, but I won't tell her until she says it's okay. She's done so much for me, been everything I could've ever asked for, hell, she's…" I shook my head with a small smile, "She's so much better than I deserve, but I guess, if she wants me, then all I can do is go along with her wishes in whatever way I can and hope that maybe, someway, somehow, I can be as good for her as she is for me. You want to know my intentions Erza?" I looked her right in the eye, "I intend to be who or whatever Mirajane wants me to be. If that's a booty-call, a boyfriend, or even just a guildmate, she deserves every ounce of affection and respect I can give her and I bloody well intend to deliver."

I sat back and looked out the window, "If this mystery ex were to come back, genuinely repentant for making her cry, I'm guessing there were tears?" I asked with a glance at Erza who nodded, "Then after I beat. The. SHIT. out of him for breaking her heart, if she still wanted him, I'd step aside with nothing but a warning to him to never even think about making her cry again, because I would make absolutely sure there was ZERO chance for a third time." I thunked my head against the window frame, "Would it hurt to see her with someone else?" I pursed my lips, "Proba-no. I'm not even gonna lie to myself like that, definitely. Definitely hurt. It would kill me inside, but I think as long as she was happy, I could keep my feelings on it to myself and move on."

I rolled around and looked up at the ceiling, "I think she may be planning to get back together with him, somewhere in the back of her head, or maybe she's just terrified of getting hurt again. Either way, she's made it clear repeatedly that she doesn't consider us exclusive. She's all but encouraged me to flirt with Cana, and I can't say I don't like Cana. Cana's pretty dang beautiful too, and she's one heck of a kisser. If what concerns you is that I'm, openly flirtatious I suppose, with other girls, then you can rest assured that I only allow myself to be that way because Mira has made it clear she doesn't mind. I don't know if you were there for it, but she all but told me to use my Pleasure magic on Cana, which is about as close to sex as one can get with their clothes on. So, I don't know if she's really into threesomes, wouldn't surprise me honestly, if she's just trying really hard to keep me from focusing all my affection on her, or what. What I do know," I declared as I rolled my gaze back around to Erza, "Is that anything Mirajane asks of me? Mirajane is probably going to get."

Erza was looking at me thoughtfully and then she nodded, "I believe I'm starting to see what Mira meant when she said you're ten percent of a Gildarts."

I tilted my head in confusion, "Eh?"

Erza smiled, "Oh that's right, I forgot, you haven't really had much time to get to know him. Gildarts is a notorious womanizer, but he's also very honest and a genuinely good man. You might want to be careful of flirting with Cana in his presence though. He's fiercely protective of everyone in the guild, but now that he knows Cana is his daughter? I expect he'll be almost smothering in how overprotective he'll be of her. Even the fact that you're the one who pointed it out to him and got him back to Fairy Tail in record time to see her probably won't be enough to save you if he decides you aren't worthy of her."

I nodded, "Duly noted and thank you for explaining. I had assumed she was simply referring to my ability to use Crash magic."

Erza flinched, "You can use Crash Magic?!"

I blinked at her, "Eh, yeah? Didn't Mira tell you that's what I upended the mountain on myself with? Thought everybody knew that. It's not my natural magic and I haven't really practiced with it, since I'm only just fresh out of my bandages and Porlyusica told me not to until I was…It's, actually really simple. I was able to show Cana how to do it in no time. Of course, Archive made that just, absurdly easy since I can just transfer knowledge at will now…"

Erza nodded, "You're right, that…probably is what she meant. I thought she simply meant that you were immensely formidable. I had no idea you could use that."

I nodded, "I combined my telekinesis with the explosive aspects of my light magic and the result was the mountainside I hit with it being blown apart at the seams under me."

Erza nodded, "That does sound like Gildarts's Crash magic."

I nodded, "I don't know if it's the exact same. I'm sure that if it is then he is probably far more proficient with it than I am, but whatever it is, Cana seemed to think it was close enough to thank me for knowledge of it."

Erza nodded, "I expect so. Well, on to the next question." Her expression turned serious again, "What are your intentions towards Lucy?"

I snorted, "If you had asked me that a few days ago, I'd have told you probably about the same thing I would about Cana. Be as nice as I can, be a good friend, if I get a chance to get with her and Mira doesn't mind, take it. Ever since Dingus there pulled his little Galuna stunt though?" I nodded towards Natsu, "I'm starting to think that he's got a very significant crush on her, and he is my teammate and my friend. I'll not begrudge him an open playing field to try and get with her."

Erza blinked at me in surprise, "What's the Galuna Island quest got to do with it?"

I frowned, "Think about it. He didn't need to drag Lucy along to pull a harebrained stunt. He's perfectly capable of doing that on his own and bringing along back up would mean he had to share the credit. He also didn't need to take the lowest reward on the board. If he was looking to prove himself, then he could've gone for a higher reward which would've indicated more risk and therefore more proof of whatever strength he had if he were successful. He didn't though. He chose the only job in the entire guild hall that had a Celestial Spirit Key as part of the reward. Why? To get Lucy to go with him."

"Why wouldn't he come to me or you for something like that?" I continued, "If he wanted a plan to get away with it and ensure the mission was a success, he would've come to me, and if he wanted permission, he would've gone to you, but either of those options means more people joining him. Normally I'd chalk it up to him being a bonehead, but given that I saw him curled around Lucy yesterday morning like she was the most precious thing in the world to him, and that he has been visiting her on an almost daily basis since we got settled in? A lot of pieces start falling into place."

I started counting on my fingers, "The Gold Zodiac Key that he knew she wanted, the element of mischief to entice her and get her excited, going alone with her on a mission which he knew would be dangerous and therefore probably involve her needing to be rescued? I don't think Natsu was trying to prove squat to the guild in general. If I had to guess? I'd say that was his idea of a date."

Erza looked like I had told her with a straight face that there were going to be cows casually bouncing over the moon that evening, "Wh-what? Th-that's absurd, surely not even Natsu would…"

"How'd…you know?" Natsu forced out as he revealed himself to have woken up, still immensely motion sick.

Erza stared at him in shock, "A-ARE YOU SERIOUS?! YOU DID ALL THAT FOR THE SAKE OF TAKING LUCY ON A DATE?!"

"Thought it would…hurp…be fun…" Natsu mumbled.

Erza kept staring for a moment and then knocked him right back out as her face twisted into outrage, "IDIOT!"

I raised an eyebrow, "Undoubtedly. Although that does beg the question, does he consider this some kind of date as well?"

Erza shot me a very, very sour look, "What?"

I started ticking it off on my fingers, "He's still getting to be with Lucy. He's still going on a dangerous adventure. Even if there's no reward, he will undoubtedly get to spend time with her and earn her trust in the thick of whatever combat or trouble may arise on this mission. The only real difference between this and Galuna is that they're not getting rewarded even if we succeed, we're already here, and there's no element of mischief because it's sanctioned and technically punishment. We've even got a cute blue haired girl along for the ride! All we need now for this to be Galuna Take Two is…"

I was interrupted by a knock on the compartment door. Erza slid it open and I nodded as I saw who had knocked, "Speak of the devil. A dark haired rival of Natsu's."

Gajeel blinked in surprise, "Eh?"

Natsu's nose twitched and then he came wide awake his finger immediately extended towards the Iron Dragon Slayer, "GAJEEL!"

"Hey Flame-for-Brains," Gajeel smirked, "Long time no see. Thought I smelled you in here."

…

…

After a quick round of introductions, Gajeel was sitting next to me and across from Erza and a still almost too queasy to talk Natsu. It wasn't until Erza asked him point blank about Phantom Lord's plans to eradicate Fairy Tail that Gajeel realized he might not be in perfectly friendly company.

Before he could panic or get violent, I interceded rather smoothly, "The plan was a total flop you know. Apparently Jose sent two shmucks called Totomaru and Sol to handle it after you and Juvia didn't report in. They got caught."

Gajeel facepalmed, "Of course they did. Geeze the boss can be such a moron sometimes…Er…" he realized belatedly that he had just confessed.

I waved his panic away, "Oh relax, Juvia's already joined Fairy Tail and vouched for you. You want me to call her for you? My Archive can project for you easy."

Gajeel looked at me in shock and then, "Yeah, yeah. I'd like to talk to Juvia about this."

I manifested an Archive screen and pulled it up to the size of a dinner tray before handing it to him, "Here ya go, she should be on any minute."

A moment later, sure enough, Juvia's face appeared on the screen as she asked tentatively, "Hello?" Then she recognized Gajeel and exclaimed happily, "Gajeel-kun!"

"Hey Juvia," Gajeel grunted, "What's this I hear about you joining Fairy Tail?"

Juvia huffed, "Stupid Jose kicked Gajeel-kun out for ditching the mission. Juvia was furious, and besides, Stupid Jose's plan backfired big time just like Juvia said it would!"

"WHAT DO YA MEAN HE KICKED ME OUT?!" Gajeel barked in indignation.

"He blew his top and called you a bonehead and said he was kicking you out," Juvia replied bluntly, "Then he tried to order Juvia back and Juvia told him to fuck off because Councilwoman Ultear of the Magic Council's mother heard him confess to the whole plan along with representatives from Lamia Scale, Fairy Tail had already caught and gotten written confessions out of Totomaru and Sol, and Phantom was outgunned about half a dozen to one because all of Fairy Tail's S-Class is either in Magnolia or very close by right now, and they've got at least three more wizards who are probably at least as tough as we are in house!"

Gajeel stared at her slack jawed for almost a full minute before, "You told Jose to fuck off?"

Juvia blushed and poked her fingers together, "Well not exactly, but Juvia thought the message was pretty clear…"

Gajeel stared at her for a moment and then threw back his head and laughed, "Good for you Juvia! I was gettin' sick of that greaseball anyway!" He laughed for a moment more before he sobered up, "So what convinced ya to join Fairy Tail?"

"They're super nice!" Juvia exclaimed, "And they have kick-ass parties that are so much better than anything we ever had in Phantom, and Fairy Tail only takes five percent of our reward money instead of twenty!"

Gajeel took all that into consideration, "And ya really think we'll be happier there?"

"Definitely!" Juvia declared with an enthusiastic thumbs up.

Gajeel reached up and wiped his Phantom Lord mark without so much as a flinch and then grinned, "Well, I'm sold. I'll see ya when I get there."

Juvia squealed with delight, "Thank you Gajeel! I promise you won't regret it! Ooh! Let me tell Master Makarov! Masteeer! Juvia just found out Gajeel-kun wants to join!"

A moment later Master Makarov's face came onto the screen, "So you're Gajeel huh?"

Gajeel nodded, "Yep, Black Steel Gajeel Redfox the Iron Dragon Slayer. Juvia tells me ya run a pretty sweet operation at Fairy Tail, thinks I oughta join. She's usually right, so have ya got room for another dragon in that nest o' yers?"

Makarov raised an eyebrow, "Are you going to be as insanely destructive as Natsu?"

Gajeel thought about it, "Ehh…depends, how destructive is Natsu these days?"

"Are you going to accidentally burn down buildings at random and make the Council send me dozens and dozens of complaints about how reckless you are?" Makarov asked flatly.

"Juvia would never let Gajeel-kun be so foolish!" Juvia exclaimed.

"We were kinda Jose's go-to team for quiet and no screw ups actually," Gajeel added before admitting a tad reluctantly, "Granted I may get a little carried away with busting heads, but that's just 'cause I enjoy it."

"Believe it or not Gajeel-kun's actually very well behaved when nobody's actively offering a fight," Juvia added, "Don't let him fool you, he was actually one of the nicest people in Phantom! That's why he's Juvia's best friend."

"Don't go tellin' em that ya crazy rain-woman!" Gajeel exclaimed, "I don' want anyone thinkin' I'm a softie!"

Juvia stifled a laugh, "Oh relax, everyone knows you're tall, dark and scary. Oh wait, I'm sorry, Mr. Tall, dark and scary."

I couldn't help but grin, it was just like Gabe and Julie back home!

"What're you laughin' at?" Gajeel growled at me.

I grinned at him, the glare was so reminiscent of Gabe's that it almost hurt, "Remember how I told you when I met you that you two look just like my best friends back home? You sound just like them too. Trust me, that's a compliment."

"Oh, well, don't make a habit of it," Gajeel grumbled, again looking so much like Gabe it was hilarious.

"I'm sorry!" I cackled, "T-the resemblance is…PAHAHAHA! You, you'd have to see it to believe it!" I took a deep breath and managed to stop laughing.

Master turned his gaze back to Gajeel, "Well anyway, Juvia's vouched for you, the door's open if you want it."

Gajeel nodded, "Yeah, I think I'd like to join."

Master nodded, "Is Erza there?"

"Right here Master," Erza replied as she leaned forward to look around the side of the screen, "You want me to mark him?"

"If you wouldn't mind," Master replied.

Erza suddenly pulled a magic stamper from her Requip Space, "Okay Gajeel, where do you want it and what color?"

Gajeel turned his shoulder to her, "Black please."

Erza nodded and pressed the stamper to his shoulder before pulling it away with a smile to reveal a shiny black Fairy Tail insignia, "Welcome to Fairy Tail."

Gajeel nodded with a grin, "So uh, I kinda forgot to ask, why are all of you on a train?"

"We're going on an S-Class job," I replied with a smile.

"Natsu here stole one without permission," Erza clarified, "So now for his punishment, Master has declared that he and his accomplices have to go on the nastiest S-Class quest I feel I can handle for no reward. I brought Jerry here and our friend Levy along for back up."

Master made a thoughtful sound and then, "Gajeel, you were one of Phantom's S-Class right?"

Gajeel nodded, "Yeah, strongest wizard in the guild behind Master Jose."

"Hmm…" Master mused, "Erza, do you want another person for back up?"

Erza pondered it for a moment, "I don't suppose it could hurt. Did you have someone in mind?"

"It would be a good way for him to get his feet wet," Master replied, "If he wants to of course. What do you say Gajeel? Want to join in on the job with Erza's team since you're already there with them? The pay's pretty good on this one!"

Gajeel thought about it for all of thirty seconds, "Hey Juvia? Think you can get my stuff moved into somewhere new? I don't want those shmucks in Oaktown getting any ideas now that I'm not in Phantom anymore."

Juvia nodded, "I was planning to anyway."

Gajeel nodded with a smile, "Alright then. I'm in! What's the job?"

"We're going to find a lost city of gold," Erza replied nonchalantly.

I'm certain that I'm not the only one who did a double take, "Come again?"

…

…

It turned out that Erza had not picked out a mere S-Class job. No, she had picked out a decade quest, a job so tough that nobody had managed to successfully complete it in the over ten years it had been available. That said, the reward was considerable: Twenty million jewels worth of considerable. Even split four ways, that was still equal to the average S-Class job.

Needless to say, this little bit of previously withheld information put a considerable grin on my face, and I was far from the only one. Gajeel looked quite excited when he found out. Natsu was so surprised and delighted that he forgot to be queasy for almost five whole minutes.

Lucy… "TWENTY MILLION JEWELS?!" she wailed from where she was being forced to be Natsu's shoulder to be queasy on, "THIS JOB IS WORTH TWENTY MILLION JEWELS?! DON'T THESE THINGS GET MORE DANGEORUS THE MORE THEY'RE WORTH?!"

"It wouldn't be much of a punishment if it weren't severe," Erza explained nonchalantly. For all that she was being a hard-ass to their faces about it and had ostensibly stuck Lucy with a severely increased chance of getting puked on, it wasn't lost on me that she'd basically given Natsu an excuse to be in very close contact with the now revealed target of his affections. Of course, the flip side of that was that Lucy would be extra furious with Natsu if he puked on her, so at this point it was more a question of what Natsu wanted more: Cuddles with Lucy, or to give in to his motion sickness and barf everywhere. High risk, high return at its finest, I mused.

Gajeel looked over at me and Levy, "So why are they getting punished for goin' on an S-Class quest? Isn't Natsu S-Class?"

"Nope, none of them are S-Class," Levy explained, "And they took the quest without permission the same day Master had just reminded everyone of the rules about the second floor and S-Class jobs."

Gajeel nodded in understanding, "Yeah that makes sense."

"It was much more the 'tying Gray up in a boat' thing," Erza clarified, "if not for that, Natsu and Happy probably wouldn't have been put on probation."

"Probation?" Gajeel asked warily.

"Natsu's rival Gray went to stop them and talk sense into them, but Natsu sucker punched him and tied him up in the little row boat they were taking out to Galuna Island," I explained, "Wouldn't be so bad if they'd left him on the dock, but they took him along on the boat with them. The waters were rough, the boat got flipped by a twenty foot tall wave and they're insanely lucky that none of them drowned, especially Gray since he was tied up and wouldn't have been able to swim if he had to."

Gajeel's expression grew more and more horrified as the explanation went on and when I was done, "And yer master didn't kick him out on the spot when he got back?"

Silence reigned for a moment and then Erza declared quietly, "Fairy Tail is our family, we're loathe to see anyone leave it, even in light of such awful transgressions." Then she rabbit punched Natsu unconscious again without the slightest warning, earning a squawk of pain from Lucy as Natsu's head was currently on her shoulder. It didn't last long because Erza's fist crashed into her jaw next and then flashed out to grab Happy by the head and stuff him face first into Lucy's cleavage to muffle his hearing. The entire series of strikes was almost too fast to follow and her gauntleted hand was little more than a blur of steel until it settled on the back of Happy's head.

"I'm hoping this quest will last long enough that Natsu's six month probation will be over when we get back," Erza admitted, "If I can just protect him from his own foolishness for six months, then maybe he'll make it through this. Six months is longer than he's ever gone without doing something foolish, that's why I chose the only international S-Class quest I could find aside from the 100 Year Quest."

We took a second to process that and then Gajeel asked quietly, "You'd really go that far for him huh?"

Erza nodded, "He may be an idiot, but he and Gray are still like little brothers to me."

Gajeel crossed his arms with a smile, "Well if nothin' else, it's good to see that my dumbest little brother found himself a good family."

Erza and Levy frowned as that processed and then their eyes went wide, "WAIT! THERE ARE MORE DRAGONSLAYERS?!"

Gajeel raised his hand to count on his fingers, "Gihi, that's right. Me, Natsu, our little sister Wendy, my little brother Lyos and Natsu's little brother Sting. That's why I'm on this train, I thought I caught a whiff of Wendy. Turns out it was just Shorty here."

Levy shot him a very dirty look, "So what? You're saying I smell or something?!"

Gajeel just looked at her and bluntly declared, "Wendy smells like tiny, blue and cute. What part of that does not describe you?"

Levy was saved from answering that by Natsu groaning, "But Gajeel, Wendy smells like outside, not inside. Levy smells like books…"

"I know that, but it was close enough to merit investigating!" Gajeel declared, "I also smelled dragon in here but that turned out to be you."

This got me curious, "So what do I smell like?"

"Your girlfriend." "Mira." There was absolutely no doubt in their voices and I admit it raised a bit of a blush to my cheeks. I just turned and grinned out the window.

"You mean Mirajane the She-Devil?" Gajeel asked, "That's not what I would've expected her to smell like at all…"

"Yes I was actually just discussing that with him right before you came in," Erza explained.

Natsu sat up in surprise and he and Levy exclaimed in surprise, "Jerry passed the Erza test?!"

"Erza test?"

"For those of us who've been with the guild for a long time, Erza's everybody's big sister except for Mirajane and Cana," Levy explained causing Erza to glow with pride, "So anyone who wants to date one of us has to have Erza's approval or risk getting beaten to a pulp. It's different for everybody."

"Yeah but nobody's passed the Erza test for Mira since-" POW!

"Be quiet Natsu," Erza ordered sharply as Natsu collapsed off her suddenly outstretched fist. I pouted slightly and turned by gaze back out the window. I heard a sharp intake of breath from Levy a second later and there was some rustling of sleeves as she communicated her shock to Erza.

"The heck are you two signing about?" Gajeel asked a tad irritably.

"Jerry is a very good boyfriend who is very protective of Mira," Erza explained, "So for the safety of both him and Mira's ex-boyfriend I'm trying to keep him from finding out said ex's identity because while Jerry is formidable, I'm not sure he's that formidable, but he's also extremely resourceful and prone to fighting dirty, so I doubt that he'd even consider a straight fight if he didn't have a way to win. Either way, I doubt either of them would walk away completely unscathed from a fight which, given their attitudes and feelings towards Mira, would almost certainly occur, and I doubt either of them would stop until someone separated them or one of them stopped moving. Since Jerry is an evil genius, it's imperative that we don't say anything about Mira's ex-boyfriend because Jerry will very quickly figure it out if we do."

It was right about then that Erza noticed my fingers scratching away at my knee like they were typing on a computer.

"JERRY," Erza declared sharply, "Mira wouldn't want you to fight him! Trust me, if she wanted him to suffer, he'd be suffering. Don't forget that Mira's every bit as devious as she is strong. She is more than capable of making him hurt in far subtler ways than merely beating him to a pulp, and she more likely than not could and would do it herself if she wanted it done."

My frantically twitching fingers slowed to a halt and a bit of the tension left me, "Fine, but he's still on my eternal shit list if she hasn't forgiven him."

"She said there was nothing to forgive and wanted everyone to pretend it never happened," Levy replied quickly.

"She would certainly not appreciate it being brought up for the point of violence," Erza added.

I growled lightly, "Fine… fine."

Everyone was quiet for a moment and then Gajeel asked bluntly, "Yer not even close to givin' up are ya?"

"Nope," I bit out. I took a breath, "I'll keep myself under control. If Mira doesn't want his ass kicked then it simply can't be helped. I'll do nothing that would upset her, but the instant I get the go ahead from Mira, there's going to be a very high chance of things getting very ugly, very quickly."

"For you," Erza shot back sharply, "You would almost certainly lose."

I shot a glance at her and saw that she honestly believed that. "Hmmm…I need to get stronger."

Erza sighed, "Men."

In the reflection of the window I could see Gajeel looking from her to me in confusion, but I decided not to comment on it. I had definitely gotten stronger recently, there was no doubt about that. However, if he was in Fairy Tail, then he had almost certainly benefited from Master Precht's tutelage as well, and judging by Erza's surety, he'd been no slouch to begin with. It also narrowed the possibilities down considerably given that even at one percent I could fight evenly with Natsu and Gray who I knew from my own experience and Erza's judgment to be two of the strongest wizards in Fairy Tail aside from the S-Class. In fact, given that Mystogan was into redheads…there was really only one person I was aware of who fit the criteria. I started running through what little I knew about him and a scowl twisted my features without my meaning to as things started lining up.

"I don't know who it is," Gajeel muttered, "But that face he's makin' makes it looks like he does."

Erza's head snapped around, "HOW?! I was certain I didn't say anything that could've given it away!"

"There are only six people in the guild that I'm aware of who are that much stronger than me that you would be certain of my defeat should I confront them," I declared, "of those six: one is Mira, one is you. Two are very much too old, and Mystogan prefers redheads. Am I wrong?"

I could tell from Erza and Levy's expressions that I wasn't. "Hmm…you're right. Lightning is a troublesome magic to combat." Erza and Levy both flinched. Yep, that was the final confirmation I needed.

"Hmmm…" I felt my fingers go to twitching again but I didn't bother to stop them, How to stop a lightning bolt…

Erza sighed, "Just remember your promise to behave until Mira asks you not to."

"Of course," I replied evenly as I turned to look at her, "No matter how much I may feel he deserves to have his ass kicked, the important thing is Mira's happiness. If Mira's happy, I'm happy. If Mira's not happy, somebody's in trouble."

Erza breathed a small sigh of relief, "Well in that case I've nothing to worry about. Mira's happier with you than she has been in years."

I couldn't help it, Erza's words had their intended effect. The knowledge that I was making Mira happy was plenty to banish the violent clouds of tactical thought from my mind in an instant.

Then Gajeel made a little whip cracking sound.

I turned around slowly to look at him and then grinned a little, "And proud of it." The way his smug, goading grin turned to an expression of complete shock was about fifty percent of the immense grin spread across my face as I turned back to look out the window towards the wall of dark clouds on the horizon.

…

…

A little while later, I think it was getting close to 10 in the evening, Erza and I headed down to the dining car. It looked like we'd be running into a lot of rain soon, so we elected to go on down and get something to eat. We didn't make it in time, and by the time we got to the end of the car, the rain was coming down in sheets. We stepped on across, hoping to make it without getting too wet. With the roar of the wind and the rain hitting in waves, I almost couldn't hear the roar of the wheels on the tracks or the rattling of the chains acting as a failsafe for the event the coupling between the cars failed.

I was intent on getting across, which made bumping into Erza's back a surprise. I looked up from where I'd had my head ducked down to keep the rain out of my eyes and saw her shoot me a terrified glance over her shoulder. There was no mistaking it either, that was absolute terror.

I don't know what possessed me to throw the door back open to the car we'd just stepped out of and yank her inside, but in retrospect it was definitely the right move… even if I tripped and we wound up sprawled in the floor. I kicked the door shut to keep the rain out and turned my attention to Erza.

My eyes went wide as I registered the sound of her ragged, panicked breathing right in my ear. I couldn't feel her heart hammering as she clung to me like the only piece of driftwood keeping her afloat, but I knew it was. "Erza," I said quietly, then a little louder and more firmly when that didn't merit a response, "Erza."

Erza jerked and suddenly she sat up, completely heedless of the fact that she was straddling me. I could see her chest heave even beneath her breastplate and the look on her face was that of someone who'd just woken from a horrible nightmare. I sat up without a word and gently pulled her close, "Hey, hey, just calm down. It's alright. You're not there anymore, you're right here with me okay? We're safe. You're safe. Nobody's gonna hurt you."

Erza trembled as I heard a breath escape her, "How do you…"

"I don't," I told her quietly, "but I was trained well enough to recognize the signs of a PTSD induced panic attack."

"PTSD?" Erza asked, scrabbling for something to focus on other than whatever hellish memory had just reared its ugly head.

"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder," I explained gently, "It's what happens when people go through something so awful that they never fully get over it. A lot of people learn to function properly again, but if anything sets them off, then in their mind, they're right back in whatever hell hole they escaped. I won't ask, but if you ever need to talk to someone about it, I'm right here." I made sure I had eye contact with her, "I won't judge, no matter what it is, and if there's anything you need help with, I'm here for you. You're my guildmate, and that means I'll do everything I can for you okay?"

Erza contemplated that for a moment and then gathered her composure and nodded, "Yes. I'm alright now. Thank you. Let's, let's get something to eat."

I nodded, "Alright, let's get up and I'll use a portal to get us into the next car. It'll be drier that way." Erza nodded and then we just…sat there for a moment.

Then Erza looked at me irritably, "Aren't you going to offer to help me up?"

I blinked and then snorted with a little smile, "Erza, look down."

Erza looked down and realized she was perfectly straddling my lap. She immediately blushed as red as her hair. I could almost hear the gears in her head screech to a halt. It probably didn't help that my body had finally caught up to the situation and ah…reacted accordingly. I made no mention of it though as I chuckled and folded my legs to stand. I wrapped my arms around her and caught her cuirass and my cloak with my telekinesis, "Uuup we go."

Erza had her feet back under herself almost immediately and stepped back, still blushing utterly crimson and refusing to meet my gaze as she adjusted her skirt. I kept my smile small as I conjured a portal into the dining car and turned to offer her my hand, "Shall we m'lady?"

Erza somehow blushed redder and nodded, standing completely stock still. It was the most ridiculously adorable thing I had ever seen. My smile turned to a mischievous smirk, "Upsy-daisy!"

To say Erza was merely flustered when I picked her up in a bridal carry would be an understatement. Something in her brain had definitely short circuited from embarrassment. If I ever made a photo album of this quest, the most utterly priceless face she was making was beyond any shadow of a doubt going in it. Off hand, I'd say it was about as good as the one I'd made when she grabbed my ass earlier.

I didn't get immediately clocked, so I just strode through the portal, noting that despite the armor, Erza was actually remarkably light. She was as light as a pillow in my arms. Of course, that could've just been the fact that I was still at what I estimated to be ten percent of my magical reserves. According to Master Precht, that meant I was also about ten times stronger than I was used to being.

The dining car was pleasantly lit with soft yellow light, and half of it was taken up by a long bar with brass bar stools. The other side of the car was lined with small two person booths that provided a good view of the country side trundling by through the large windows. The roar of the storm outside was little more than a faint drumming on the roof that blended well with the noise the train made. Altogether it made for a very relaxing atmosphere.

I carried Erza over to a bar stool and gently set her down. The urge to steal a kiss as I took in her flushed face and vaguely star struck expression was almost too much. I actually caught myself leaning in before I forced my instincts back under control and sat down on the stool next to her. I grinned and brushed the urging of my instincts aside to cheerfully request a menu from the highly amused bartender. No alcohol. After that little almost a slip up, I knew that there would be absolutely no way I'd be able to restrain myself around Erza if I were intoxicated, and Mira's warning about what happened whenever Erza got drunk was still quite fresh in my mind.

The bartender, a short and stout young woman with a big friendly smile and a head full of dark curls, handed across a pair of menus and propped her elbow on the bar with a cheeky grin, "So, what can I get fer the happy couple?"

I chuckled, "While I'm flattered that you think I could catch such a fine woman as Erza with anything short of a miracle, I've actually already spent my miracle to become attached to her equally amazing best friend."

The bartender's eyes went wide with excitement, "Whoa, yer Erza Scarlet? That's so cool! I totally see why they call you that too, yer hair's so pretty! I've never seen anyone with hair like that!"

Erza's blush deepened again and she smiled, "Oh, well thank you. Yours is quite lovely as well."

The bartender reached up to her wild black bush of hair that was only narrowly held in check by a bandanna and a modest laugh, "Oh what, this mess? Nah, horrible. I'd much rather have nice straight hair like yours, it must be so much less hassle. If I want mine to look even a little presentable, I have ta fight with it fer half an hour!" She chuckled, "But that's enough about me, tell me about you! I've never had a celebrity in mah car before!"

By the time we headed back to our car over an hour later, any trace of Erza's nightmarish flashback had completely vanished in wake of the cheery conversation and sunny smile from the bartender. As we got up to leave, she had one final question, "Hey, just one more thing before ya go. I've kinda been thinkin' I might like ta learn some magic. Mermaid Heel's actually only a few miles from my hometown and I've always thought about joinin'. Ya think I might could cut it as a wizard?"

Erza turned that heart stopping smile on her and was completely oblivious to the way it knocked me flat as she told Risley that she was certain she'd make a fine wizard. Risley on the other hand, "Hey is he alright?"

Erza looked down at me and my brain rebooted just in time for me to get knocked right back to Lala-land as she shot me a fond smile. She said something that made Risley laugh and say something, Erza said something back and then waved goodbye before catching me by the scruff of the neck and tossing me over her shoulder. The jolt knocked me back to my senses and I looked over my shoulder at her, "As much as I don't mind, I gotta know, is this going to be a thing with you?"

"Depends," Erza shot back cheekily, "Are you going to keep fainting every time I smile at you?"

"Mayb-EYAK!" I yelped in surprise as she copped another feel of my ass, prompting another teleport halfway down the car. I drew myself back up and whirled to look at Erza, "If you just really wanna feel me up that bad then just say so!"

Erza suddenly caught me by the front of my cape and dragged me along with a grin, "SO. Mira's talked up your performance quite a bit and she gave me permission to play with you before we left. So yes, in light of all your teasing, I think it's time for me to tease back. Thanks for the food Risley, best of luck if you decide to join a guild! Whether you join Mermaid Heel or come join us at Fairy Tail, I'm sure you'll do wonderfully. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go make good on some threats." Risley gleefully called for us to have fun.

Erza dragged me back across to the sleeper car and I breathed a quiet sigh of relief as her trauma made no sign of rearing its head. Then I remembered why she was dragging me and it was my turn to blush as red as her hair.

When we got back, Gajeel was the only one still awake and with Lucy stretched out using Natsu for a pillow and Levy doing the same with Gajeel, there were no seats left. Gajeel looked up at us and rumbled out quietly, "Second door from the end's mine. I got a private one since I normally don't like sharin'. I'll make sure ya don't miss our stop."

Erza nodded, "Thank you Gajeel." Then she closed the door and dragged me along. Well, led really, I wasn't resisting at all (who would?!). We made our way down to the compartment Gajeel had indicated and as Erza slid the door open I noticed that there was very little space in it as most of it was taken up by a small bed. It was barely big enough to sleep one comfortably, so I opened my mouth to tell Erza I'd sleep on the floor so she could have the bed…

Theeen she pushed me into the room, down onto the bed and straddled me after closing the door behind herself. She positioned herself perfectly, and gave me the most cat-caught-the-canary grin I have ever seen. "Now then…" she mused, "I wonder what I should wear for this…Hmmm…" Light flashed and suddenly she was wearing a cat ear headband, fluffy paw gloves, a skin tight blue and black striped one piece, and white stockings. She smiled at me as my eyes nearly popped out of my head, "Like what you see?" Then she downright purred as she ground herself against me and ensured she had my FULL attention.

She smirked down at me, "Or maybe…" another flash, "You prefer bunnies?" BUNNY GIRL?! MIRA JUST HOW MUCH DID YOU TELL HER?!

Erza leaned down to get right in my face, "Ohhh…you like that? Hmmm…" YES VERY MUCH THANK YOU! NONONONONO…MIRA'S WAITING AT HOME, MIRA'S WAITING AT HOME… WARNING ERROR ALERT SHIT SHIT SHIT NO GO BACK DOWN…

Hands that felt way too soft and delicate to be as strong as I knew they were slid under my shirt, "Let's get this off…"

She pushed my shirt up and only the fact that my arms were rigidly clenched in place kept her from shoving it right up over my head and on off. The mischievous light in Erza's eyes faltered for a moment before she gave me an alluring grin, "Bunny girl's not quite doing it for you? Don't worry, I've got one more that's even better…" OH FUCK WHAT NOW?! PLEASE TELL ME SHE DOESN'T HAPDSFSAJNF?!

She'd sat up a little, still keeping her hands on my chest as the light flashed around her again. Then she was wearing what I was fairly certain was nothing more than an apron that I'm certain I could see nipples trying to poke through, a maid hat, some lilac colored gauntlets and maybe something on her lower body but I was too busy getting swamped in the wave of what felt suspiciously like my own brand of Pleasure magic trying to override every shred of self-control I had.

To say I was at WAR with myself is an understatement. My heartbeat and blood roared in my ears and every fiber of my being screamed for me to bring her lips crashing to mine, to hold and caress and play with every inch of her, and most of all find out exactly what was beneath that apron in the most intimate and thorough manner I could. I twitched and shook as I tried to retain control. My eyes bulged to see her better until I crammed them shut. My fingers scrabbled at the sheets for anything to hold onto to keep me from grabbing her and ripping that outfit off her. My whole body shook violently as my hips tried to thrust of their own accord and I did everything I could to stop them. My front tried to curl me up to her while I fought to keep my back as straight as a board. My mouth opened to say something, and I slammed my teeth shut with such force that I'd have undoubtedly bitten my tongue off if I'd missed, not giving the faintest ghost of a damn what lust-addled words might've tumbled from it.

Worst of all though was the way that my sense of touch seemed to have been hyper sensitized… Every brush of fabric from the sheets beneath me and the heat of Erza's body as she rode my fit like a rodeo bull was a fresh wave of flames trying to burn away my control. For what felt like an eternity, the animalistic urges I thought I had long since gotten the better of and suppressed raged against my will for control.

It wasn't until a nightmarish image of Mirajane in tears flashed through my head that I was able to muster the strength to stop shaking and force my magic to kick the influence of whatever it was that was coming off that outfit Erza was wearing. I took a deep breath and tried to forced my pulse to calm down. I opened my eyes and didn't quite snarl, "Erza. Enough."

Erza actually looked utterly stunned, and then a moment later, she flashed again and was suddenly wearing conservative lilac pajamas with little cross and heart logos all over them. She tilted her head to the side and smiled softly, "Congratulations. You passed."

Everything clicked as her actions all afternoon suddenly made sense. "You've been testing me since the train station haven't you?"

Erza nodded as she sat back and crossed her arms with a small grin, "I really thought I had you for a minute there. Nobody's ever been able to resist my Seduction Armor before. Hmph, most don't make it past my Kitten Outfit, let alone Bunny Girl. Lucky you, we would've had to carry you off the train in pieces if you'd failed at this critical stage."

I exhaled slowly, try as I might, my heart was still jackhammering from what I'm certain had almost been a heart attack, "You almost did. I'm curious, how much did Mira actually tell you about what we did?"

"Very little actually, why?"

"So Bunny Girl's just a standard phase of the test?"

"Yes, why?"

"Because Mira has a bunny girl outfit just like that one you were just wearing except black that I happen to really like seeing her in," I explained, "Honestly, no offense, but if it had been Mira instead of you, any self-restraint I have would've gone flying out the window instantly. You actually pull that look off every bit as well as she does. There's no way in hell I could've restrained myself if I didn't have her back home waiting for me. If Mira and I ever break up, and you don't hate me afterwards, I want to see you in that and that third outfit you had again. Until then though," I exhaled shakily, still trying to get my pulse the last little bit settled down, "No matter how mind blowingly gorgeous you are, the answer is no unless Mira's down for it."

Erza smiled at the compliment, "Well, now that I know I can trust you…" she laid down on top of me and wrapped her arms around my neck as she laid her head on my shoulder. "…take good care of me," she whispered in my ear before shifting around just enough to make absolutely sure there was no way I was going to sleep easily and then she got very still and I guess she was comfortable.

"Is this what you meant by teasing me?" I muttered as I gently raised my arms to wrap around her waist.

She reached down with one hand and moved my hands about six inches lower before grinning into my jaw, "Nope, this is. Since I grabbed your bottom, you can touch mine, just this once. Good luck going to sleep though!" she laughed quietly.

I took a moment to register that and then I vindictively charged magic power to my hands with a mischievous grin, "Well I'd hate to leave a lady unsatisfied." Erza felt the charge rush to my hands and I felt her tense in preparation. Then I unloaded straight into her with a blast of Pleasure that made her whole body shake every bit as hard as I had and earned me a very very arousing moan of surprised ecstasy.

A moment later, after she stopped instinctively grinding herself into me to drive herself higher and higher on those wild waves of pleasure I'd induced into her system, she went completely limp and groaned into my ear, "That's cheating…"

"You know what's really unfair though?"

"What?"

I snapped my fingers and she drifted off to sleep, with me right behind her as I forced the sleep magic to wash through my body as well and relieve me of the stress it had just been placed under. I fell asleep grinning from ear to ear, I love my life…

…

…

Erza and I woke up right before the train rumbled to a halt. Erza sat up on top of me, looking very surprised to find me there. Then she remembered the night before and blushed crimson again. She thought about slapping me, it was not a quiet thought, but she restrained herself and vented a frustrated breath instead. I quirked an eyebrow at her, "Agree to never speak of this again?"

Erza nodded with an odd look on her face, "Agreed."

Then Gajeel knocked on the door, "Hey, you two alright in there? We're pullin' into the station."

Erza requipped into her usual clothes and armor, "Yes we'll be right out."