Aubrey was having a good morning. Today she was in no rush so she opted for the French press. She set water to boil in the electric kettle then pulled out the top-of-the-line conical burr coffee grinder she got from Williams-Sonoma. It whirred to life, efficiently grinding the decaf dark roast coffee beans from the farmer's market. Once everything clicked and dinged announcing it was ready, she scooped freshly ground coffee into the French press. Aubrey drew careful circles as she poured the hot water over the grounds, making sure the coffee was evenly covered, then stirred the brew with a wooden spoon. The steam was rich with the heavenly aroma of the dark roast and Aubrey breathed it in with a smile. For her, this ritual was an act of mindfulness, requiring all of her senses to be fully committed to the here and now.

As she waited exactly 5 minutes for the coffee to be ready, she opened her leather-bound journal and wrote down her positive affirmations for the day.

"Today will be a great day."

"I am worthy and I am confident."

"I am strong and I can overcome each and every obstacle sent my way."

She smiled as she punctuated the last one, internalizing it. There was a subtle vibration from her phone and she clicked into life. It was her husband. She accepted the video call.

"Hey Bree Bree, how's my girl doing?" Jesse asked with his usual bright smile. He'd taken to calling her Bree Bree the second they started dating, and while Aubrey was never big into nicknames she'd made an exception for him.

"Hi, sweetie!" Aubrey's face lit up, she loved his smile, it was almost as good as her coffee. "Oh you know just getting my morning started."

"Did I just catch you in the middle of journaling? What's today's affirmation?" he asked. He knew his wife's routine well and loved to tease her about it.

"Uh-" She began but was interrupted.

"Oh wait, can I guess?" he asked eagerly.

"Sure." He always does this. And it never failed to make her smile.

"Is it, I am lovable? Cuz you totally are."

"Nice try."

"OK is it- I radiate confidence? Cuz you totally do."

"Nope, but I'm loving this so please do go on." Aubrey was grinning from ear to ear now.

"Is it, I look smokin' hot? Cuz you totally do."

He's so lucky he left for work early, Aubrey thought as she pictured herself doing him on top of their very nice and sturdy kitchen table. "Nope, but you are just the absolute sweetest. It's actually, I am strong and I can overcome every obstacle sent my way."

"Nice! I like it! I mean, you can totally overcome every obstacle. But if you need backup, I got you."

"I know, dear." You've only told me a million times, Aubrey thought with her heart full of love for the man. "So, how are things on your end?"

"Good, sorry I had to dash early, they needed me on set."

"Whatever would they do without you?" she said with a smile and a tilt of her head.

"I know right? Hey listen, don't forget that we have that appointment today."

"Thanks for the reminder." Like I would miss it, it's been on my calendar for ages. "I miss you."

"Me too babe, oh umm, it's umm Friday."

"Yes, it is." Her tone turned salacious, she knew where this was going.

"A-are we still on for you-know-what tonight?" Jesse looked around, embarrassed.

"Oh, well that depends. Are you wearing it?"

"Bree Bree come on, I'm at work."

"Point taken, so no choker today, what about the other one? You know that one I mean."

"The one on my… you know?"

"That's the one."

Jesse looked around, blushing furiously. He nodded. He couldn't believe he was doing it, but there was definitely something exciting about doing secret kinky stuff at work.

"That's my good boy. I'll have a special treat for you later." Oh, I'm so going to peg you tonight. She knew it and he knew it. They'd been building up to it and she just got the right size toys for it. They were both really enjoying their foray into kink-land.

"I-I uh, yeah I can't wait." His face turned crimson, he knew what she wanted, and while it was very new, the whole concept had him feeling extremely vulnerable. It was still very exciting, he just struggled to admit it. "Alright, I gotta go! Love you, Bree Bree."

"Love you too!"

Aubrey clicked off the phone and placed it face down on the counter. She smiled, there was a slight blush across her cheeks. She was looking forward to tonight, though she was slightly disappointed that he didn't want to wear the special choker she got for him. She understood. The fact that he was wearing his cock-cage right now excited her. She absentmindedly touched her necklace, from which hung a small golden key. She loved being her man's key-holder.

They've been engaging in some BDSM play since last year after attending a sexual wellness retreat in Germany that turned out to be a kink-focused couple's retreat. There they learned about power dynamics. Surprising no one, Aubrey turned out to be a natural Domme. Jesse being an emotional and supportive partner accepted the role of Submissive. He was still a bit shy about it, but that just added to her excitement. His half-hearted reluctance was adorable.

Ever since then they've been exploring the BDSM world and actively incorporating it into their lovemaking. They agreed to keep it just for Fridays, which ended up working perfectly because after a tough and tense week, they enjoyed a heavy session to unwind.

Aubrey found that this arrangement worked perfectly for her. With her body wrapped in latex or leather, and her feet in dangerously high-heeled boots, she felt powerful. As a Domme she was in control, she could make him kneel, worship her, and she could also use him for her own pleasure. But it was also enjoyable to tease him endlessly. She'd stroke his cock softly and gently, then not so gently, stopping just as his torso arched. He would groan and whimper pleadingly, begging for release. And it would come, but only when she said so.

Aubrey sighed, thinking about what she planned on doing to him tonight was getting her heart racing. She fanned herself and exhaled, she was really missing him this morning. But today she needed a more subtle, peaceful and gradual beginning to her day, instead of the good chaos he brought to her life. She ignored the creeping anxiety winding up inside her and focused on her coffee. Time to take the plunge, she thought as she slowly pressed the plunger on the French Press.

She poured exactly 200 milligrams of coffee into her favorite mug. It was white and worn from years of use. The 12-ounce mug read in faded gold letters "Bellas 4 Life." It had been a present from Chloe a million years ago and she would cherish it for the rest of her life. Even though she'd personally never use the number 4 to replace a preposition, for her Chloe got a pass for everything for life. She took her time to savor the aroma of the coffee before taking a sip. It was perfect for a decaf, fragrant, robust, slightly bitter with low acidity, an ideal substitute for her morning brew.

She took in the silence of their home and for the first time since moving in it felt too quiet, too big for just them. "Today will be a great day. I just know it."

After taking her time enjoying her coffee, she did yoga for thirty minutes before taking a quick shower and getting ready to go to work. She settled on a chic black power suit, slim-fitting and tailored expertly. She looked at herself in the mirror and her smile brimmed with confidence. She was ready to take on whatever the Board threw at her.

Aubrey glanced at a corner of her wardrobe, there was a shiny latex one-piece calling to her. She wished she could wear that instead. That would really put the fear of God into those spineless cowards, she thought. The idea made her giggle wickedly.

"Today will be a good day," she repeated to herself as she walked out the door.

"I'm sorry, we lost how much?" Aubrey asked, trying her best not to shout her question to the man sitting across from her. Her fingernails drummed noisily against the giant glass table. Every single person in the boardroom could feel themselves shrink at the sight of the unhappiness of Aubrey.

The little man nervously adjusted his collar and replied, "Just shy of $3 million, ma'am,"

"Just shy is not a number!" she snapped.

"Um $2,985,450, ma'am."

"So, we lost $2,985,450. OK, can you please explain to me exactly how that happened?" Her tone dripped with contempt. Her gaze narrowed as the man explained the mix-up with the environmental assessment for the new location and how they would have to scrap the project altogether and cut their losses or make another substantial investment and find a new location. The Board was not happy about the latter option. Aubrey could hear her heart rate slowly increasing. After a few minutes, Aubrey drowned the man out, her vision blurred. She pressed her hands to her temple and took a deep breath, trying to calm down. She was starting to get a headache, she looked over at the intern by her side, and mouthed the word "Tylenol".

The young woman immediately nodded and scurried away. After a second, she was back and handed a pill bottle and a glass of water. Aubrey thanked her and quickly downed two pills.

This project had been her baby and a lot of jobs depended on it. This would be their 20th retreat and it was set to be in Montana, which always had a special place in her heart. She was specifically looking forward to it because she was hoping to introduce a pilot program that she personally designed that incorporated an equine-assisted element and if it was successful it meant more jobs. And best of all, she'd get to rescue a few horses from the local community.

"OK, Stop," Aubrey commanded and everyone complied immediately. "So we know what the problem is, and I don't even care who's at fault here, right now what I want to hear is how do we fix this? This pilot program needs to be green-lit by the end of the fiscal year or-" Aubrey stood up, ready for war, and immediately felt a sharp cramp in her stomach, she doubled over and grimaced. The pain was impossibly sharp, and it took her breath away. Her whole body went cold, and her face went pale.

"Ow!" Aubrey contained her urge to scream as she pressed her abdomen. Don't let them see weakness, she thought as she tried her hardest to regain her composure. But the pain was all-encompassing.

"Ma'am? Are you OK?" the intern asked concerned, as she gently placed her hand on Aubrey's shoulder.

"I'm OK-" Was the last thing Aubrey said before she lost consciousness.

Aubrey stared out the window, the sky was a miserable gray and the rain was relentless. She had always liked the rain. Sunny days were fine too, but rainy days were her favorite. She understood why people assumed that she liked sunny days more, it was pragmatic, and so was she. But rainy days gave her the excuse to stay in for once. She'd switch from coffee to green tea or lavender if it was later in the evening, and she'd indulge and read something campy, frivolous and raunchy involving time-traveling women and rugged men from days of yesteryear, or if the mood was right she'd watch something scary and a little gory. Rainy days meant Aubrey got to relax for once. There was nothing relaxing about this rain. It was hard, merciless, and the glass screamed in response to its violence.

"I hope it stops raining soon," Aubrey said softly to no one.

"Aubrey!" Jesse shouted as he barged into her hospital room. He was breathing hard, and his eyes were wide open and wild. He immediately wrapped his arms around her.

"He told you?" Aubrey asked without moving.

"I- yes, he told me." He bowed his head, hiding the pained expression on his face. It hurts so much to look at his wife right now.

"Jesse. Jesse, we lost-" But the words died on her lips, the emptiness in her eyes, her smile a facade, fake and crumbling.

"I- I know Aubrey, I'm so sorry." Jesse was an eloquent man, some would say he was quick-witted, though his friends would call him a smart-ass. But he certainly knew how to think on his feet and charm anyone with his dazzling smile. Right now he couldn't think of anything to say, he believed that he had nothing of value to say to his wife. Nothing that would in any way provide her with the reassurance and comfort she desperately needs. He was at a loss.

"You're sorry? I'm the one who's sorry Jesse. I'm-, I can't- I can't-" Her tone was erratically uneven. It was the tone of someone on the edge of a very tall precipice.

"It will be OK, you have nothing to be sorry for Aubrey, it's going to be OK." He repeated other equally empty but well-meaning dribbles.

Aubrey smiled, he was a kind man and she loved him for it. A kind and clueless man. Because it wouldn't be OK. It would never be OK again.

"Jesse?" she asked, her voice hollow.

"Yeah?" His response was muffled, he was holding back.

"Do you think it will stop raining soon?"

But it would rain all night.

Aubrey had been on personal leave since the incident at work. She found that as long as she kept busy, she didn't have to think about that night. Wanting to do something special for Jesse, she went all out with dinner. She made an herb-crusted rack of lamb with a red wine reduction sauce, roasted garlic mashed potatoes and sautéed French green beans with toasted almonds. She selected a bold, full-bodied Merlot that paired perfectly with the lamb. Aubrey was wearing a tight and low-cut backless black dress and her hair and makeup were done up perfectly. She even went for the pearls that she knew looked amazing on her. The whole thing took hours to set up, which was perfect for Aubrey.

She looked at her phone, the time read 8pm. He should be here by now. She rested her chin under her fist and watched her perfect dinner grow cold. Her phone vibrated, it was a message from Jesse.

"Hey babe, I'm so sorry, but we have a situation on set, I'm going to be late, don't wait up."

Not even a call? She pursed her lips, annoyed, and scoffed.

Ever since that day, he'd been working overtime a lot. She wanted to be understanding, ever since he'd been promoted to his dream job of Music Director he'd been given so many responsibilities, and they relied on him so much. But she couldn't help but feel a bit of resentment. The doctor had cleared her two weeks ago, they could resume their sex life, and this was the third time he had to cancel date night since then, or was it the fourth? She was starting to feel restless, she hadn't realized how important their sex life was for her. She wanted him, either bound or unbound, she simply longed for her husband. Aubrey wanted to feel a connection, and while masturbation was fine, she wanted his embrace, his warmth– she wanted him entirely.

The fact that they hadn't had sex in a while made her feel inadequate, and it made her question herself. Was there something wrong with her now? Because of what happened? She pushed those thoughts away, they were far too dangerous to explore. But worst of all was that she felt incredibly alone right now.

Aubrey stood up from her chair, grabbed both plates and unceremoniously dumped them in the trash. Then her gaze landed on the leather-bound journal on the table, it had a light layer of dust. Curious she opened it. She read the very last entry, tracing each word with her fingers.

"I am strong, and I can overcome each and every obstacle sent my way."

Aubrey slammed the journal closed and dumped it in the trash. She walked back to the table and downed the glass of wine she had poured for herself then grabbed the glass meant for him. She let the dress slip off her shoulders, and walked down the hallway wearing nothing but her black stilettos. Whatever fun plans she had for tonight, would be done solo. Again.

To be continued.