"Oh my God, I hate myself," you groaned, rolling around in your bed and feeling like a complete idiot. You buried your head in your pillows, thrashing around beneath the blankets, absolutely torn to pieces after the way you embarrassed yourself last night. Everything was fine, up until Simon had woken you up. You thought back on your childish antics, remembering how annoyed he sounded as you forced him to have to yank you out of the bed.

"I made him want me to just leave!" you shouted to no one. If you didn't have any self control you would be pulling your hairs out over the humiliation that burned in the pit of your stomach. You could remember his eyes, his gorgeous beautiful sleepy brown eyes, looking down at you with irritation as you acted like a kid being woken up for school. God, he probably thought you were so stupid. Why would you act that way in front of the Lieutenant? The serious, mysterious and dangerous man, your superior, whom you'd tried so hard to keep your cool around.

All that, ruined.

A tear nearly squeezed itself out of your eye as you dragged yourself out of bed, wanting nothing else but to crawl back into it and hide. You peeled off your clothes and hopped into the shower, images of Ghost's face leaning into you as he tried to wake you up flashing through your mind. You moaned and groaned about it all through your shower, wishing you could go back and not drink so much. Or hell, even go back and just not act like a complete imbecile after awakening. Everything had been fine up until then.

He probably thinks I'm such an idiot.

You spent the next few days avoiding Ghost like the plague.

You went about your daily chores in the compound, peeking left and right around every corner so if you saw him you could beeline for the exit. You were still in the throes of mentally punishing yourself for the scene you'd caused, deeply pained by feelings of humiliation every single time you thought of the man. Soap had commented on your change in demeanor after that night and even pulled you aside once to ask if Simon had "hurt your feelings or something". You'd shaken your head no, telling him that you had just fallen asleep and that was that. You really, really wanted to tell Soap how you truly felt, but didn't really think he'd understand. He'd probably feed you back with some crap that wouldn't make you feel any better.

You breathed a heavy sigh to yourself as you half-heartedly shuffled through some papers in the designated work area of the compound. The air escaped your lips in a defeated puff, and you turned around with your head down to nearly walk straight into someone.

Your heart sank the moment you caught sight of his dark military shoes. You looked up quickly, making eye contact with him for the first time in three days. He stood there watching you silently. You wondered just how long he had been standing there.

"Oh, hey L.T.," you tried to sound confident but even you could hear the awkward twinge in your voice.

"What the hell's your problem?" He said, looking down at you through long blonde eyelashes stark against black eye paint.

You stepped back, realizing that he was in your bubble. You acted confused. "What do you mean, sir?"

"I mean that you've been avoiding me for three days."

"I'm not avoiding you!" You defended yourself unconvincingly.

"I saw you turn and walk the other way as soon as you caught sight of me yesterday."

Your cheeks burned. You had really hoped he did not see that.

When you didn't answer immediately, he waved it off. "Doesn't matter. You're coming with me."

"Huh?"

"Put the papers down and come on." He turned, not even giving you a moment to digest what he said before making toward the door.

You stared at his back, dumbfounded for a moment before dropping the papers and hurrying after him.

You exited with him, nearly running to catch up to his side. You could tell what mood he was in based off his authoritative stride that threatened to leave you behind. You had to nearly jog to keep up with his walk. You glanced up at him, and he stared ahead as you moved together. You wondered why he didn't feel the need to offer any explanation.

"So, um… Where are we going, sir?" You resisted the temptation to grab his arm in order to keep from falling behind his long-legged gait.

He finally glanced down at you for a moment before turning his eyes upward again. "I'll tell you shortly. We're in a hurry."

When you both finally settled in with your team on the plane, Ghost finally told you what was going on. It seemed everyone else already knew but you.

The unit had just received brand new intel involving a high-profile target everyone thought was dead up until now: Al Rahman Al Maghrebi. He'd been on the run for years with no trace left behind, up until now. The man was wanted for his previous ties with a notorious terrorist organization that had threatened the country for years, and even had a few successful attacks. New information had him almost pinpointed within a secure location buried deep in the desert, manufacturing weapons and equipment to be sold directly to the United States' most prolific terrorist organizations. You were giddy just thinking about it.

Everyone else was too, all amped up and ready to go since their recent downtime after the fortunate conclusion of the last contract. Soap wore a confident smile on his face as he spoke with Price on the other end of the plane. Gaz and some of the other associates chattered together as well, discussing the plans of the mission. You watched everyone silently, happy to finally have something to take your mind off what had been stressing you out for the last few days. It made you feel better, too, the way Simon had questioned you on your odd behavior. It seemed like he didn't hate you, like he was genuinely concerned about your avoidance. Was all that worrying for nothing?

"Why the long face, Y/N?" Soap asked as he came up to you, taking the seat next to you and settling in.

You glanced up at him before responding. "Oh, I'm just, uh…. I'm just focused on trying to memorize this guy's face." You unlocked your phone, immediately opening to a screenshot you'd taken earlier in order to remember the target's appearance. Your eyes swept over the image once again. "He's… not too easy on the eyes."

Soap laughed. "Got that right." Then he glanced around, making sure no one was nearby before leaning in closer to you. "So, can ya tell me what the hell's going on between you and L.T.?"

You glanced up at him and into his eyes. They were wide, curious. You recoiled a bit, noticing that it seemed like he'd already come to his own conclusions. You bristled. If he realized you had slight feelings for the Lieutenant, you would never hear the end of it, and neither would Ghost. You envisioned Soap making it awkward with feeble, high school-esque attempts to insinuate that you and Ghost had something going on. Probably make attempts to "suggest" something to L.T. as well. The thought made you uneasy.

"What are you talking about, MacTavish?"

"Oh, don't give me that, Y/N. You both have been actin' so weird ever since that night in the bar. Ye've got to spill the beans, mate."

You did your best to keep your expression controlled and unwavering, fighting a blush that threatened to burn your cheeks. "Nothing happened, Soap. I already told you, it was too cold outside for me to sit around and wait for all of you to come back. I was drunk as hell, sat down on his bed and fell to sleep. We didn't even really talk to each other."

"Aye, that's not what it looked like," he pressed you further. He was really starting to get under your skin now. His voice dropped lower. "What with you hangin' all over him like you were."

You rolled your eyes, your heart fluttering slightly as you thought back to the way Ghost had picked you up, your head rolling onto his chest. So unprofessional and inappropriate. He was your boss for goodness' sake, and you wished you weren't such a hopeless romantic to find yourself thinking about him all the time. You thought for a moment that you should let it go, find a different man or pick up a romance novel to fulfill your girlish desires. You'd feel ashamed if your crush ever got out in the first place - might as well end it instead of pining after someone who probably doesn't think twice about you, except in relation to the job at hand.

The thought made you sad.

After a moment of thinking, you responded to Soap. "Yeah, that was… really inappropriate. I probably won't trust myself so much around liquor the next time." You let out a breath that pushed a tuft of hair away from your face, and then you looked at Soap again. "But hey, um… what did you mean when you said 'you both are acting weird'?" You hoped it wasn't obvious that you were prying for a glimpse into Simon's thoughts about that night.

"Well, for one, you've been acting like you aren't a part of the team ever since. I haven't seen you out and about much, and when I do, it seems like you're just zooming around, avoiding everyone. And Simon -" he glanced around once again. "- he's been so distracted, won't hardly talk to me. Off in his head. Ask him a question, he doesn't hear it. Not focused on his work, taking longer than normal to get things done. Staring off into space."

Soap was watching you, reading your expression. You could see that, but you couldn't hide that it piqued your interest. When you realized he was waiting for your response, you shrugged at him. "I dunno, maybe he's stressed out. Stop worrying, Johnny. I'm not here to steal your boyfriend."

You said the last part with a smile, and he let out a quiet chuckle. "Whatever it is, he's acting off. Got me a bit worried, have to admit."

You nodded, feeling the same way. You stole a glance around the room in an attempt to see where he was at - and you found him, sitting in the corner, watching you and Soap.

Your hairs prickled and it sent a shiver down your spine. Does he do that on purpose? You looked away quickly and back to Soap. "Speaking of your boyfriend, why don't you just go ask him?"

Soap scoffed. "Look at him! He's not saying a damn thing. And if he did, I'd be willing to bet your arse that he'd be telling Price." At the mention of the Captain's name, Soap nodded his head in that direction. You looked over at Price then, realizing that Soap was right. Ghost doesn't open up much to anyone. But you knew that in times he had, it was usually to Price. A trustworthy confidant.

With your thoughts still wandering, fueled by the mystery you'd missed out on after avoiding him for three days straight, you wondered silently if Ghost still had his eyes on you and Soap. You didn't want to glance over and see, though. So you entertained yourself once again by gazing into the terrorist's face on your phone, awaiting your eventual arrival somewhere in the desert.