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It was an atypical Friday for the gang, as they sat in the Vega living room anticipating the soon to be arriving Valentines day. Beyond the usual dramas around that time of year was the added drama of Tori trying to figure out something that just didn't make sense to her. "Trina, I have your latest load." She said as her sister came down stairs.

The older girl had started collage, as well has bouncing from one semi-humiliating yet featured roll to another on Spanish language television shows, yet still chose to hang out with Tori and her friends as they occupied the Vega home. "Oh, what did my secret admirer give me this time?" The older girl asked. No longer at Hollywood Arts, she relied on her sister to carry the almost daily gifts and cards that materialized outside Tori's locker, only to be addressed to the older girl. A small stuffed bear wearing an approximation of the lady cheese boob costume was accompanying yet another card. She opened the card and squealed with delight.

"And we're sure Trina isn't just sending herself cards again?" Beck asked.

"Trust me, it's real." Robbie assured them. "What? I hear things, like how Tori also has herself a secret admirer."

"She does?" Jade asked, eyes now locked on the Latina.

"Yea, but the last card was kinda creepy." Tori told her friends. "They said they'd love to show me how far they'd go, but it was illegal to spread pornography to minors."

"Dick picks." Andre said, before looking at Cat. "Sorry, I meant…" He looked for an excuse.

"It's okay, I get it." Cat replied, smiling at him to let the musician know she was okay. "Some people send nude pictures of themselves. I mean I know, Beck gets loads of them. Just, you know, no guys. Or at least, I haven't heard of any."

"I'm sure that's just rumor." Tori told her, even as Trina continued to read her card, over and over. The older girl was vibrating with excitement.

"No, they're real." Cat replied. "Jade showed me the pictures."

"You kept the pictures?" Trina asked, momentarily pulled from her revelries.

"Of course he did." Cat argued. "Because guys like bosoms. And thanks to Jade, I've seen loads of them."

"Jade?" Tori asked.

"I took the pictures from Beck, and I keep them in a photo album." Jade confessed. "But it's for two reasons. First, I don't need Beck flooded with Northridge girls topless photo's. More importantly, since most of them include their faces, I also know which girls to keep an eye out for."

"Lots of bosoms." Cat repeated. "Jade locks the albums up, because… Why, again?"

"Because those pictures ARE child pornography, and my having them is technically illegal, so I have to hide the album." Jade explained. "Also, Sinjin might find them when he illegally searched my room, so I lock them up someplace safe."

"I never asked anyone to send me nude pictures." Beck felt he had to defend himself.

"So, Trina has a secret admirer." Tori shifted. "Who Rob here swears is real."

"They are." Robbie confirmed.

"Any chance I could see…." Andre tried to whisper to Beck.

"Jade has all the pictures." The handsome boy said. "She's very good at finding where I might hide them…"

"How do you know this so called admirer is real?" Tori asked. "Though it could be Sinjin…"

"Not Sinjin, and that's all I can tell you." Robbie said. "I've been sworn to secrecy."

"Wait, you know who her admirer is?" Tori demanded.

"Yep, he does." Trina said. "And they are very real."

"They needed me as a go between, because they needed some information, so I did them a solid. After, I was sworn to secrecy, and apparently they'd need my parents signature on a nondisclosure agreement." Robbie said.

"Makes it more romantic, up until they're ready to reveal themselves, on Valentines day." Trina cooed. "Now, apparently they also know who Tori's admirer is, but again, Rob won't tell."

"Wait, they know?" Jade looked through the nerdy boy. "How could they know, and, um, who?"

"Again, I was sworn to secrecy, this time under penalty of a sever wedgie." The Jewish boy protested. "No more questions. Just, yet, sometimes I help get the presents and card to Tori's locker, cause it's less creepy, I think? I don't know. I offered to bring the gifts here, except they said they never wanted anyone to think I was Trina's admirer. It's why they also dropped gifts off while I was in class."

"My admirer is very thoughtful." Trina told the gang. "I do admit, I am kinda sad for my sister, cause I have two… I can tell by the handwriting on the cards, as well as the way things are written. But I have two, and she has only one. However, I think I know who her admirer is, and I know, that card promising sexual favors should Tori want them, if I'm right, it was just them stumbling over trying to be romantic. Not their strong suit."

Beck sighed. "Enough talk about secret admirers." He groaned. "Look, Jade, I know you wanted to get back together for Valentines day..."

"Are you going to get those skanks to stop sending you nude photos?" Jade asked. "I mean, some of them are adults. Talk about creepy…"

"You know I can't do that." Beck said, and immediately wished he'd worded it differently.

"Wait, you two are broken up?" Cat asked. "Does that mean I can have the album?" She glanced around. "Just, all those bosoms… Not gay, just, I think I should hold on, for the safety of whomever Beck dates next."

During the long, uncomfortable silence that followed, the gang all agreed to change the subject, and the gang was able to move on. However, the tension in the room remained almost toxic. Robbie, realizing he needed to make himself scares, made his excuses and exited the home. He walked a block to a near by park, and sat down on a bench with a mirroring bench behind it.

"So?" A very female voice asked.

"How did Trina know you knew about Jade?" Rob wondered.

"I didn't tell her." The woman, sitting safely behind Robbie on the second bench, said. "Still, loved the reaction. Thinking Beck is having kittens. Did Cat succeed in getting Jade's trophy book?"

"They're not trophies, just her one concession to being Bi." Rob tried to defend his friend. "She hasn't nailed one of those girls."

"You're right." Alyssa Vaughn said, sighing. "Still, I'm just glad I saw her dropping that note into Tori's locker. Think it'll work out for them?"

"Not sure." Rob replied. "Unlike you, she didn't identify her gender in an early note. I just wish you hadn't asked me to verify, cause the look in her eyes. Just that glare alone made me feel like the wedgie was starting."

"No perving out on me, boy." Alyssa said. "Look, next note, I ask to meet Trina someplace, and we see what comes of it. Just, Jade, I want Tori to be happy, but how do we make sure our cousin doesn't blow it?"

"Technically first cousin…" Robbie said to the woman who's father had married his mothers sister. While his aunt had left the faith, it still meant he and the celebutaunt had grown up knowing one another.

"Okay, we're good. However, don't blame me if you find your pants getting tight…" Ally joked, even as she prepared to leave. "Arrange a play date between the two, let them figure this shit out." She stood up. "And Rob, get that book of naked teens away from her. Jade needs to look at on line porn like the rest of us. I mean, god…" She shook her head and walked away.

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