A/N: To the guest reviewer on FanFiction dot com who references their balls in every post, for the second time - please desist and go bother other people. You don't like my writing, which is fair. Stop reading, go elsewhere. Insults, threats, and other forms of harassment are neither needed or wanted.
Witch Way part 2
* Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry, Main Hall *
"Well, Potter, this time-"
"Hold it right there, Draco. Draco, I'm sorry."
Draco Malfoy blinked. "What?" There were a number of responses he'd been prepared for, but that hadn't been one of them.
"Look, I understand you wanted to be the foil or rival of the whole Boy-Who-Lived thing, but this isn't working out," explained Harry Potter, sounding genuinely apologetic and regretful. He'd been coached on how to do it, and he'd picked up the basics. "It's just that nowadays I need someone better at the snappy repartee and, well, being clever about it all. No offense, it's clearly me and not you. You can be Ron Weasley's rival, your grades are about the same and he's much more content with such a thing. Just come by and gloat about the Chudley Cannons or something and he'll oblige you."
"WHAT?!" Draco glanced around at the various people. That some of his own backup were looking thoughtful and nodding was a bit alarming.
"Can I be your rival/nemesis?" asked Daphne Greengrass. "I'm much better at it, and can even switch teams when my own personal code of honor and behavior dictates it."
"Well, I'm taking applications now, but I assure you that you're up at the top of the list," said Harry with a nod of acknowledgement. "Glad to have you."
"Oh, can I be your rival?" asked Luna.
"I had you down for 'plucky sidekick' but I suppose you can at least apply," allowed Harry, enjoying the way Draco Malfoy looked both confused and furious. At several points it looked as if Draco was about to shout but then went straight back to confused.
"Well," said Parvati Patil, looking contemplative. "If we're going with the usual tropes for someone of your level of celebrity - are we going to be voting for the role of 'potential love interest' or is that too dangerous with certain individuals running around?"
THAT got everyone talking, Draco shouting, Mrs Norris meowing for whatever reason the cat felt a need to add input, Snape and McGonnagal arriving (Snape rolled his eyes and muttered a few things that sounded vaguely insulting while Minerva McGonnagal put one galleon down on Hermione Granger), with the Weasley Twins running around and taking bets on the whole thing.
Harry, of course, left as soon as attention was off of him. That was another trope altogether and this particular one he had no trouble with.
That the concept hit Witches Weekly and was rapidly the subject of a serious of polls for their readership honestly shouldn't have surprised anyone.
* Hogwarts, Dumbledore's Office *
"All right, we've found three Emma Barnes in the United Kingdom, and two in MacUSA. Also one in the Ukraine and another in Brazil," said Albus Dumbledore. "None of whom appear to be the Emma Barnes whose name popped out of the Goblet. Four are too old, one died in an accident involving something called a 'Mardi Grass' and two are much too young."
"How young?" asked Madame Maxim.
"Two and five," answered Dumbledore. "There's also nineteen muggles with that name. Putting a muggle into the Tri-Wizard Tournament though..."
"Might be entertaining," quipped Karkaroff.
"If it is dangerous to wizards, then it would be impossible for a muggle," said Dumbledore.
"Was joke," tried Karkaroff, not that anyone believed him.
"We could try summoning the Emma Barnes on the paper, but that would be quite the effort," said Albus Dumbledore.
"Not much we can do," said Karkaroff after an awkward silence. "Magical contract not binding on muggles so mostly not a concern, yes? Concentrate on getting first task finished."
* Brockton Bay, Rig Garage *
Sophia Hess came out of the transport, nervously twitching at any movement of shadows anywhere near her.
She'd confessed and the shadows had retreated. For now. She had no illusions about what would happen if she did anything to invoke certain horror tropes. She was currently IN a horror movie and she knew damn well what kind of thing could happen to the "young athletic girl" in such films.
She spent a moment feeling sorry for Madison and Emma, but they were on their own at this point. Yeah, the "bitchy hanger-on" and "popular snob" were in for their own personal journey to hell.
She was a survivor. If she needed to play by some rules to survive, she'd play by those rules and look for all the loopholes she could.
* Wizarding World, First Task *
Taylor watched, sitting with a few Gryffindors and a Ravenclaw.
Her understanding, come to after observation and a few questions directed to others around here, was that this world had some pretty severe issues and things which made no damn sense except from the point of view that some fantasy tropes were real. Otherwise, why was the slowest bird used to deliver mail? Otherwise, why would a student in Scotland have to go to London to take a train to go back to the same rough geographical area? Otherwise why would a group that was basically the magical Empire 88 be the singlemost powerful faction when anyone who had a basic farmer's understanding of genetics could point out that they were screwing themselves over? Why have a rule about no magic in the hallways when you had stairways that would move around underneath you over a freaking potential fall of four stories?
Honestly, sometimes Hermione's observation that the wizarding world had no concept of logic or common sense hit entirely too close to the mark.
Not that Hermione didn't sometimes show off her own blind-spots.
So the First Task of the "newly safer" Tri-Wizard Tournament was stealing a fake egg from the clutch of a mother dragon. Clearly the wizarding world had a strange definition of making something "safer" - though Taylor did understand that the wizarding world itself was hardly safe. Everyone was carrying around a wand which was as dangerous as a gun as well as Swiss-Army knife and could use compulsion spells and forgetfulness spells and freaking love potions for crying out loud! The mundane world was safe as anything in comparison.
She'd been flat out told that someone her age shouldn't be asking questions that she thought was perfectly understandable. Such as asking how often spells and potions were used for "date rape" activities and how did one defend oneself from such things.
Ah, Victor Krum used that Conjunctivitis Curse to partially blind the dragon, transfigured rocks to dogs to distract the dragon, and then got in and grabbed the fake egg. Ending up with lots of flamed dogs, an enraged dragon, several of its real eggs smashed, and Krum having to use the fire extinguishing charm on his own robes.
He didn't seem entirely the bad sort, but he clearly hadn't been completely ready for the dragon despite everyone letting their champions know what they were facing ahead of time. She herself had told Cedric.
That reminded her. Creatures that had multiple births tended to die off quickly, or so she thought she remembered from nature programs back home. It was true of mammals, reptiles, chickens, and so on. Wolves had litters and most didn't survive to adulthood because nature was a cruel mistress. So what killed off all the other dragons so that one out of a clutch of a dozen would survive to adulthood?
Possibly the dragons themselves. These weren't very intelligent if one would smash more than half her eggs in the process of trying to protect them.
Fleur was up next. Ah, she was doing a lullaby to lull the dragon to sleep. Less confrontational than Viktor, perhaps indicating that Beauxbatons was less focused on smashing any obstacle in their way. More likely to produce diplomats or counselors, despite Fleur seeming to be a bit prickly and snooty. Not that Durmstrang didn't produce its share of snooty.
Let's see. There was Moody, going around looking as if he was pissed at the world. Most everyone else just looking either bored, excited to see the dragons, cuddling up with their significants, or chatting with their neighbors. Notable exceptions were Draco Malfoy looking constipated, the various amateur bookies trying to keep track of the betting, Ravenclaws reading, half the Hufflepuffs waving flags to show Diggory support, and the judges arguing about something that she couldn't make out from her position.
Huh. Someone set off a cannonblast spell in the stands just as Fleur was getting close to the dragon. That was not entirely unexpected but pretty poor sportsmanship.
Dragon trying to burn Fleur, Fleur shielding and creating some rocks to hide behind.
Oh look, a Slytherin was facing a few upset people because trying to get someone killed in what was basically a sport event was frowned on. Who'd have guessed?
Hmmm. She might have to look into that one. A clean-your-mouth-out-with-soap charm? Taylor nodded to herself, thinking she knew a few people who could benefit from that one.
* Brockton Bay *
"Ugh."
"What's wrong, Skiddy?"
"Just got a feeling like something BAD is destined to hit me. Must have been some impurities in that last batch."
* Wizarding World, First Task *
Harry Potter wasn't sure WHY Moody kept staring at him while sipping from that hip flask of his.
He could think of a few reasons why, most of them not good.
Ah, Cedric was up now. Time to see what the Hogwarts champion had prepared during the past few months.
Then would be the call for this 'Emma Barnes' to make an appearance. Not that anyone had come forward even after an ad in the Prophet had warned of the consequences of missing the event.
Cedric took one of Taylor's suggestions. Darkness spell around the dragon's eyes. Conjure up ropes, tie them together, use a flame freezing charm on them, then a sticking charm on one end, levitate that out to the fake egg. Grab the egg with the sticky end of the rope, then move the thing closer while the dragon protected the real eggs by feel.
One close moment but the dragon smelled the fake egg and then ignored it in favor of the eggs that actually smelled like eggs.
What the hell was with the Durmstrang judge? A 5? When Cedric did it the fastest and with as little damage to dragon or eggs? Bloody unfair that one.
"Emma Barnes!" called out Albus Dumbledore. "Last chance for Emma Barnes to appear without penalty. Emma Barnes?"
The Goblet of Fire abruptly appeared in front of the judges and the flames changed to a strange red, shooting up a good meter from the rim.
(Pop!)
A redhaired girl in muggle clothing was abruptly standing there and looking absolutely panicked.
"Are you 'Emma Barnes'?" asked Dumbledore, his Sonorus spell still going.
"Y-yes? Who are you? Why am I here? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" asked the redhead.
"Apparently the Goblet of Fire summoned you here to participate in the Tri-Wizard Tournament," explained Albus Dumbledore.
"I'm not doing anything. My father is a lawyer and this is illegal search and seizure," said the redhead. "Wait till my father hears about this!"
"Are you related to Draco Malfoy?" asked someone in the silence following that.
Draco loudly denied any such thing and if anything the red hair must mean she was a Weasley.
The girl in question replied that if anyone looked like a weasel it was him, and she was standing on her rights and going to get everyone involved arrested.
"It appears we have a muggle participating in the Tri-Wizard Tournament," said Dumbledore. "Well, if nothing else, this is definitely a first. Young lady, you have to go face a dragon and take the golden egg off the nest."
Emma Barnes, if that was indeed who this strange girl was, looked at the dragon and the eggs, back to Dumbledore and then back to the dragon before addressing everyone. She called into question Dumbledore's heritage, authority, mental status, and whether or not he was actually using medications of a non-therapeutic variety. She referenced laws and rights. She included several references to some sort of birdcage, and the possibility of becoming wealthy from the benefits of a legal battle.
"They're not actually going to make her face a dragon?" asked Taylor from where she was sitting.
"I wouldn't think they could get a muggle to participate, doesn't she have to be from one of the schools?" asked Hermione.
"Do you forfeit then?" asked Dumbledore of the girl.
"I refuse to participate in this farce!" declared the girl. Abruptly streamers of SOMETHING came shooting off the girl and into the cup. She collapsed.
A couple of healers examined the girl and declared her still alive, a muggle, and showing signs of magical trauma.
Fortunately, there was a hospital aligned with Saint Mungo's that specialized in muggles who had gotten mixed up with wizarding mishaps. "Saint Sebastian's Long Term Care Facility" was for insane people, as far as the muggle populace was concerned, and could see to her treatment. Dumbledore explained all this, as usual taking twenty words for every one that was necessary and going off on a tangent about previous Tri-Wizards being so much more dangerous.
* Brockton Bay, Hebert Household *
Six hours. Six hours for his world to crumble. Three hours for him to know it had happened.
Annette had died texting while driving. He'd immediately banned cellphones from his household. If Taylor had had a cellphone, would she have been able to let him know she'd been trapped in the locker? Would it have required three hours for someone to reach him at work?
Now Taylor was in the hospital, showing signs of being in a coma. Infected. Insect bites over a good half of her body.
Questions remained. Why hadn't she told him? Why hadn't she said anything? Was it because both of them had been living a half-life since her mother's death?
What could he have done different? What could he do to make this right?
The silence in the house didn't seem to offer any answer.
* Wizarding World, Second Task *
"So..." said Taylor. "We're just watching the surface of a lake for an hour?"
"Looks like it," said Ron Weasley. "Other than listening to that bloke trying to do commentary."
"Well, at least I brought some homework to do," said Taylor. "What's the third step in the transfiguration of a beetle to a pillbox?"
"I hope Hermione's okay," said Harry, shivering a bit in the cold wind.
Taylor idly cast a warming charm on him before speaking. "She'll be fine. Krum's competent enough. Think there might be a romance there?"
"We're too young for that sort of thing," said Harry.
"Take a look around, a lot of wizards and witches are pairing up at our age," noted Taylor.
"It's 'butterfly to pillbug'," answered Cho Chang. "And yes, Harry, it's a wizarding thing. Maintaining bloodlines and magical inheritance is a thing. Particularly after the Death Eaters went around ending some of those very bloodlines."
Taylor jotted down the answer. "Transfiguration is tricky with remembering these spellchains. Why would you even WANT to turn a beetle into a pillbox?"
"Always asking the hard questions," muttered Cho Chang. "What did you get for the 'three ways to avoid the Killing Curse'?"
"Dodge, Block, and Get the other guy first," answered Taylor, who then thought about it. "No. Wait. The official answer is Dodge, Block, and Escape."
"I like the first answer better," said Harry.
"Because the rest of us can't bounce a Killing Curse off our noggin," said Taylor, "I'm all in favor of proactive survival tactics."
"We've noticed," said Cho Chang. "Seriously."
"I've been the target of some pretty vicious bullying," said Taylor, not looking up from her homework. "Once I was away from it a bit, got some distance, I made a few observations and decisions."
"Transfiguration spell chains are a pain, some of them not making any sense at all," said Cho Chang. "Potions are worse though. Have you seen the directions for this Slippery Oil?"
"Oh, yes, actually," said Taylor, brightening and looking up from her own scrollwork. "That has SO many uses even if the book only mentions squeaky doors and stuck drawers."
"I thought you hated potions," said Harry as he watched the lake.
"I don't hate it, I just don't see a use for any of them that use ingredients I likely won't be able to get when I go back home - which is most of them," admitted Taylor. "Slippery Oil has mundane substitutions. Banana peels instead of oil from a murlap's spleen, for example."
"Home in the other world?" asked Harry, who actually flinched a bit when Taylor's attention snapped fully onto him.
Taylor was quiet for a moment. "How long?"
"It was a lot of little comments adding up, just figured it out a couple of weeks ago," said Harry. "None of my business, but I tried to get information about the whole parallel worlds thing and immediately Cho and Hermione were 'oh, like Taylor then' - so I guess I wasn't exactly the first."
Cho turned a page and frowned at it. "Yeah, I think most of our study group put it together this year. Faculty is likely clueless, pretty much the usual state with anything other than classwork."
"Was there something specific that gave it away?" asked Taylor, eyes shifting as if looking for a way out.
"Lots of little things, usually when you were tired and it was late," said Cho. "Like when you would put the date down automatically but the year was wrong. 2011. And mentioning Brockton Bay, which is Plymouth here. The major thing was the disinterest in magical plants and ingredients even when it is a fairly common one."
"Damn," said Taylor, shaking her head.
* Saint Sebastian's Long Term Care Facility *
"She's howling about the 'parahumans' again?" asked Behavioral Technician II Alice Manning as she came on-shift.
"Yeah, had to go to four-point restraints after she assaulted Brad on the night shift. Escape attempt. Kept calling him 'Hookwolf' for some reason." Nurse Campbell shook her head. "Doctor's going to have to adjust her meds again."
"Well, not the weirdest we've ever had. Remember that guy who insisted he was a daisy, wanted us to water him every day?" asked Alice.
"At least he was mainly quiet and didn't yell about being strong or 'parahumans' or swear vengeance against anyone," pointed out Nurse Campbell. "So far nothing from the search for her family and associates. Got another name though. She apparently has some hate on a 'Taylor Hebert' but nothing came up on a name search locally."
"Ex-boyfriend you suppose?" asked Alice.
"That was the initial thought," agreed Nurse Campbell. "One bit of good news. We have a physical match with a missing person list out of Northern Ireland. If this is her, then 'Emma Barnes' is actually Siobhan Danson. Disappeared on a family trip to Cairo two years ago."
"Well, that's a bit of good news then," agreed Alice. "Any other problems overnight?"
"Just Walter, but he's just got the attention span of a squirrel," said Nurse Campbell.
* Hogwarts, Second Task *
"So, Viktor got first place. Cedric second. Fleur coming in third." Harry shook his head. "That was a bit of bad luck."
"Veela aren't that good with cold environments or water, so it should have been expected," pointed out Cho. "Bottom of the lake in this weather? Has to be damn cold."
"I just hope they do something less boring for that third task," complained Ron Weasley.
"Think this was bad for Fleur, can you imagine what would have happened with that muggle girl?" asked Cho.
"She'd have been dead just facing a dragon," said Ron. "Except there was something that got drained off her. If she didn't have magic, what was that about?"
Taylor stirred. "Physical energy. That's why she collapsed. She got drained to the point of exhaustion."
"Huh," said Ron. "So what happened to her?"
"Shipped off to some treatment facility where most of the admins are in-the-know about magic," said Cho, with a glance towards Taylor. "Squibs and family members of muggleborn mostly. That sort of thing."
"Oh, like my family has an accountant," said Ron. "We don't talk about him. I just know there's one out there."
* Earth-Bet *
The Simurgh unfolded in her orbit, examining a single point where a blind spot had developed.
Because it was in the nature of Conflict Generator #3/20, she analyzed it as best she could. The blind spot was currently six-hundred point sixty-six squaa across. The blind spot was centered on Brockton Bay, an area that was on the list of targets for Conflict Generator #2/20. Blind spot was blind spot - she could not see the past or the future in that area for a period of -14 planetary rotation periods to (insufficient modeling resources).
Inquiries were sent. A lack of previous occurance was noted.
Host species had done something new. This was both alarming and satisfying.
Alarming because unknown process had a chance, however small, of interrupting due process of cycle.
Satisfying because new data was entire reason behind cycle.
Being outside of expected parameters was further alarming but also intriguing.
Request was sent to Conflict Generator #2/20. Consideration of dropping target area until further data could be acquired through alternate sources.
* Wizarding World *
"So you're the famous Taylor Hebert," said the pleasantly scruffy-looking man. "Sirius Black."
"Yes, we know who you are," admitted Taylor. "We were in the shack with Pettigrew, remember?"
"Well, technically, yes - but you were in your animagus form at the time." Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Not everyone is open about such things."
"It's very impressive," said Harry from where he was sitting.
"Unfortunately, the more well-known it is, the less useful it is," admitted Taylor.
Sirius shrugged one shoulder. "Well, I've heard quite a few things about you over the past year."
"Some of it good, I hope," said Taylor.
"That you were inventive, paranoid, that you're a bit too fond of explosions, and have a complete disregard for wizarding conventions," said Sirius with a nod. "So, yes. Quite a few good things."
Alistair Moody thumped closer. "Keep an eye out, Potter. If anything happens, it'll all go pear-shaped in a heartbeat. Constant Vigilance!"
"FLEUR DELACOUR HAS ENTERED THE MAZE!" shouted Bagman from the podium.
"Susan would be quite upset if something happened to her boyfriend," teased Taylor.
"It's not like that!" protested Harry.
"Oh?" asked Sirius. "I admit to some curiosity here. As his dogfather, I do have an interest in who has caught the eye of my innocent young godson."
"It's not like that at all," argued a beet-red Harry.
"What have you heard?" asked Taylor.
"Oh, that Harry is dating Susan Bones," said Sirius. "He's been in engagement arrangements with the Greengrass family regarding his schoolhouse rival Daphne. He's been snookering with Luna Lovegood - and either the people spreading that rumor didn't know that meant playing pool or..."
"Luna Lovegood does in fact like the game of pool and seems to have a pretty good sense for the game," admitted Taylor. "Darts she's hopeless at, same with poker."
"I've heard him linked with you, but I've also heard you're linked with Draco Malfoy which seems a bit of a stretch," said Sirius. "Harry though has been linked to a good quarter of the witches and three wizards."
"CEDRIC DIGGORY HAS ENTERED THE MAZE! AND THAT'S ALL THREE CHAMPIONS!" shouted Ludo Bagman.
"Ludo, you already have a Sonorus up, there's no need to shout," advised Albus Dumbledore, clearly heard over everything else.
"WHO WILL BE THE FIRST TO REACH THE CUP?! WHO WILL WIN THE TRI-WIZARD TOURNAMENT! LET'S GET READY TO MUMBLE!" declared Bagman.
"That's supposed to be 'rumble' - even I know that," said Sirius.
"If he means to stop shouting than that's a good thing," said Harry. "Hmmm. Did you want something, Mister Moody?"
"Just this," said Alistair Moody, patting Harry on the shoulder.
Both Harry and Moody vanished.
"Wow, just when I think Taylor's gone too paranoid by half, she gets proven right," said Taylor.
"What just happened?" asked Sirius.
"I'm Hermione," said 'Taylor' - "I made polyjuice. Taylor is in her animagus form and Harry is actually Professor Flitwick."
"How'd you get a Professor to go along with it?" asked Sirius, it sounding like a magnificent prank.
"A favor owed, since Taylor came up with some impressive charmwork that he helped publish for her," said Hermione/Taylor.
"Well, then, where's Harry?" asked Sirius.
"You think he wouldn't go along with them?" asked Hermione/Taylor. "If there's someone going after him, he wants a piece of them. You should know how much he just wants to be left alone to have a normal school life?"
"Normalcy is over-rated," opined Sirius Black. "Any chance we can get in on whatever they're doing?"
* A Graveyard In Little Hangleton *
Peter Pettigrew stood next to the little baby carriage with the deformed child Dark Lord. Alistair Moody appeared with Harry Potter - planned.
The winged serpent that Peter was all too familiar with shooting up out of Harry Potter's robes was MUCH less planned, welcomed, or for that matter desired. In fact, it was straight out something of sheer ballbusting terror because he knew DAMN WELL what that thing could do.
There was a hiss-spit sound and then Alistair Moody was clawing at his eyes and screaming like a lost soul.
"KILL IT!" demanded Lord Voldemort.
"Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!" tried Peter Pettigrew.
Like some impossibly nimble hummingbird, the snake darted and dashed and then disappeared.
"It... apparated?" asked Peter, the feeling of horror actually getting more intense.
(HISS-SPIT!)
Lord Voldemort screamed as something smacked him in the face and BURNED.
"Milord, don't rub your eyes it'll just get in..." Peter tried.
Lord Voldemort's scream went up to near-ultrasonic levels.
"Aurors! To my location!" said a voice that was NOT Harry Potter's despite coming from Harry Potter. "Authorization code Omega Five Six Six Unicorn."
"Peter! Your wand!" ordered the Babymort. "Call... call!"
Aurors began appearing even as Harry shifted to become Madam Bones, the head of the DMLE.
"Incarcerous," cast Madam Bones, looking somewhat satisfied as Peter Pettigrew fell to the ground.
"Ma'am what do we do about... THAT," said Shacklebolt looking down at the croaking deformed Babymort twisting about in agony in its stroller.
"Department of Mysteries has a cell or two that should do the trick while they figure out what it is and who it is," said Madam Bones. "I want the crime scene locked down, full investigation. Vetted only."
"What about the... snake... thingie?" asked Shacklebolt as the winged serpent glided down to a treebranch.
"What 'snake-thingie'?" asked Madam Bones.
"Understood, ma'am."