Chapter 28

"Did the night meet your expectations?" Ezra asked.

Kaylee wrapped her arms around Ezra's neck. "I didn't think I'd lose right away," she said, wrinkling her nose.

Ezra's lips twitched. "My dear, how do I put this gently?"

Kaylee cocked her head in question.

"You are one of the worst poker players I've ever met," Ezra said, his eyes glinting with humor.

"What?" Kaylee asked.

"I love you, but you are a terrible liar." Ezra's arms tightened around her waist, almost distracting Kaylee from what he said.

She wasn't a terrible liar. If she was, Ezra would never have married her. Not if she hadn't kept everything about Cletus, the choices she had made, to herself. She should have maybe told him about Cletus and the money she owed, but the window of time for confessing had passed. Some time before they got married, but that was gone. And now she was almost in the clear and Ezra would never have to know about any of it. She was still turning her logic around in her mind when the other part of his statement caught up to her.

It echoed what he had said earlier. "You love me?" she asked before she caught the doubts that escaped.

Ezra's brow knit, his hands tightening on her. "I married you," he said. "Why did you think I did that?"

Kaylee shook her head. "To stop fighting?" she guessed. "To make things right. I don't know. You just never said that before." She felt her cheeks warm, embarrassed that she was even talking about this with Ezra, especially in the middle of the crowded poker tournament. She started to pull away. The waiters were clearing the tables, people starting to head out. Ezra would collect his winnings and they could leave.

Ezra didn't release her. He studied her face and Kaylee couldn't hold back a wince at what she imagined he was seeing. He tugged her closer to him, his arms secure around her.

"I love you," he said. "I can say without a doubt you are the first person I've said that to. And I mean it."

Kaylee's impulse was to ask him if he was sure. But she caught the words before they escaped. Everything in Ezra's face said he meant it. His eyes had softened to a sincere green, making the gold flecks in his eyes almost glow.

"Ezra," she said his name on a breath, moving her arms from where they were draped around his shoulders, running the palms of her hands over his jaw, settling his face between her hands. "I love you."

Something flickered in Ezra's eyes. Something that was broken long ago taking the words in. Her feet secure in the boots he had given her- laying claim to her with his name tied to hers- her heart secure in his hands, her future secure with him, Kaylee tilted her face up to meet Ezra's lips.

His lips were a breath away when the sound of a crash, had them both looking over towards the noise.

Kaylee saw a waiter picking up a dropped tray, Vin wobbling on his crutches and nearly falling onto the floor after the tray.

Kaylee glanced up at Ezra. He motioned for her to go towards Vin, staying close to her side as she wove through the thinning crowd.

An older woman, her face still beautiful in spite of the years that lined her features, rested a hand against Vin's sleeve. She motioned dismissively to the waiter. Kaylee was close enough she could hear the woman offering to bring Vin up to her hotel room.

Vin staggered forward a step and Kaylee moved quickly to grab his arm before he fell.

"It's ok, Honey," the woman said dismissively to Kaylee. "I've got him. He's with me."

Kaylee looked to Vin. His eyes were unfocused, he weaved on his crutches. She kept her hand on Vin and scowled at the woman. "No he's not," she said.

"Excuse me?" the woman asked, her eyes narrowing. "Who are you?"

Kaylee tightened her grip on Vin when he wobbled and mumbled something about finding a tent for the night. She glared at the woman. She thought of all the times she had gotten a call to come into town and get her mom. The men that had picked up her mom when she was popping pills and drinking, dulling her reactions and taking away any sort of judgment. She opened her mouth to tell the woman exactly what she thought of her, taking advantage of Vin when he clearly was so far out of it he didn't know what was going on, but Ezra stepped in.

"It would be best if you moved along," Ezra said. The woman pursed her painted lips, her eyes running over Ezra.

"Do you want to—"

"No," Ezra said shortly. He turned his back on her, returning to Kaylee's side just as Vin went down.

Kaylee tried to keep Vin steady, losing her grip as he pitched forward and landed hard on the ground.

She dropped to her knees next to him, forgetting about the delicate fabric of her dress, ignoring the stares of everyone around them. She saw her mom on the ground at her fourth grade play, remembered trying to help her inebriated mom up in front of everyone. Tears sprang to her eyes and she blinked quickly, trying to shove the memories back as Vin looked up at her.

"Where am I?" he asked. "That floor just dropped right out from under us."

"Oh, Vin," Kaylee said, hating to see such a good man so helpless.

Ezra crouched down on the opposite side of him, getting one of his muscled arms under his friend. "You ready to regain your feet, Vin?" Ezra asked.

"Never lost 'em," Vin said.

"Come on," Ezra instructed, making sure Vin's injured knee was protected from the coming movement. He looked over at Kaylee, his brow wrinkling in concern at her tears. Kaylee did what she could to help Vin back on his feet, getting his crutches back under his arms.

"What's going on now?" Chris asked, making his way toward them. Kaylee saw his frown, thought of every frowning judgmental face that had looked at her when she had gone into the bar to get her mom and bring her home over the years.

"He's stoned," Kaylee snapped at Chris, keeping a protective hand on Vin.

Chris cut his eyes over to Vin. "Stoned with what?"

Kaylee grit her teeth. "How many pain pills did he take?" she demanded.

Chris' brow knit as Vin mumbled something under his breath. "He took two and they didn't do a thing. I gave him another. And then one more."

Kaylee felt her fingers curling into Vin's coat sleeve too tightly and tried to let go of the fabric. "And how many drinks?" she asked.

Chris shook his head. "A couple. A few."

Kaylee stared at him. "You're lucky he's still breathing," she bit off.

"Look, I never said I was a doctor," Chris said, his own voice lowering with annoyance.

Kaylee's voice rose with emotion. "All you had to do was not be an idiot!"

Chris' entire face darkened as he looked down at her. "Watch your tone," he said.

Kaylee was too tangled up between memories of her mom and Vin's clear inebriation to read his look. "I'm not watching anything," she declared. "You're the one who should have been watching Vin."

"That's enough," Chris said. His jaw was tight. Before he could say anything more, Ezra stepped between him and Kaylee.

"That is enough," Ezra said, the words for Chris more than Kaylee. "Step back, Mr. Larabee."

Surprise flared on Chris' face, but he backed off. He looked at Kaylee and she glared back at him.

"Someone's going to have to stay up with him tonight," Kaylee said. The routine was too familiar. "Make sure he keeps breathing."

"Would you rather we do that in our room or his?" Ezra asked.

Relief flowed through Kaylee. She hadn't expected Ezra to be alongside her. There had never been anyone there to help with her mom.

"I'll take care of him," Chris said.

Before Kaylee could tell him he'd done more than enough, Mary stepped in. She pursed her lips with concern when she saw Vin. "I'll take him to my suite for the night," she said. She cut her eyes to Chris. "Alone."

"Are you sure?" Kaylee asked.

She looked at Vin, starting to shuffle forward on his crutches. He bumped into a potted tree. "Sorry, ma'am," he muttered.

Mary smiled at Kaylee as Ezra went to get Vin. "You and Ezra go enjoy the rest of your night. I'll take care of him."

Kaylee nodded uncertainly. "If his breathing gets too slow, like less than six breaths a minute, call 911," she said. "Tell them you need narcan. If the cops are closer, they all carry it and can get there with it."

Mary looked at Kaylee speculatively, but nodded her understanding. "I'll take care of him," she assured her. She looked over at Chris. "You think you can manage to help me get your friend up to my room without drugging him worse?"

Chris had the good sense to hold back any further comment. He took Vin from Ezra, waiting for Mary to come along Vin's other side.

Kaylee watched them make their way slowly from the ballroom. Ezra's arm came around her and she pressed against his side, drawing on how solid he felt alongside her.

"Are you ready to go back to our room?" he asked, brushing a kiss across her hair.

Kaylee shook her head. "Could we…" she pulled back enough to look up at him. "Could we go back to the camper tonight? The room's really nice," she hurried to assure him. "But it doesn't feel like home. Like the camper."

Ezra smiled. "Home?"

Kaylee nodded.

"Home with you sounds good," he said.

#

Ezra hadn't seen Kaylee as shaken as she was by seeing Vin stoned and drunk. She was quieter than usual when he got his truck from the valet. He took off his tuxedo jacket and settled it over her shoulders before he helped her up into the truck, smiling to himself at the sight of her boots with the elegant gown. He hadn't been lying when he said he loved her just as she was.

The drive to the rodeo arena didn't take long. They made a short stop at Buck and JD's camper so Kaylee could reclaim the black beast she called her pet.

Buck opened the door, his shirt unbuttoned over his jeans. When he saw Kaylee, his grin widened.

"Well ain't you just a picture," he said.

Kaylee smiled in return. "I just came to get Barney." At the sound of her voice, a bark sounded from inside the camper, then nails clicking across the linoleum and the dog skidded around Buck, missing the top step and scrambling down the next one to land unceremoniously at Kaylee's feet, springing right back up to jump in circles around her.

"It seems you were missed," Ezra commented. He should have kept quiet. The dog's ears perked up at the sound of Ezra's voice and his entire body shook with excitement as he ran over to Ezra, mindless of Ezra's expensive tux, jumping up on him.

Ezra gave the dog an obligatory pat which satisfied the animal and sent him back to run circles around Kaylee.

"Thanks for watching him," Kaylee said.

"Buck?" a feminine voice called from inside the camper.

Ezra didn't miss the way Kaylee's eyes widened. Apparently she didn't realize what Buck's priorities were in Vegas.

A pretty woman came to the door, her face relaxing into an easy smile at the sight of Kaylee and Ezra. "Oh, I'm sorry," she said, a light accent to her words. "I'll wait inside for you," she said to Buck.

"Nah, come here," Buck said, holding an arm out to her. She was slightly more dressed than Buck, even if it was in one of his shirts. "This is Kaylee and Ez. A couple of good friends." His eyes were warm when he looked at his companion and looped his arm around her waist. "This is Inez."

Kaylee found her smile and greeted Inez. Ezra didn't bother committing too much about her to memory. There would be a different cocktail waitress tomorrow night. But he greeted her and wished her and Buck a good evening.

When he opened the passenger door for Kaylee, she stepped back, allowing the dog to jump in first before getting in herself. Ezra found himself behind the wheel with the giant lab in between him and his wife. But Kaylee had her arm wrapped around the dog, her fingers working through his fur, apparently seeking comfort after the encounter with Vin, and Ezra didn't say anything about the animal.

When he pulled up in front of the camper, he heard Kaylee's audible sigh of relief. He unlocked the door and opened it for Kaylee. The camper was hot, the desert air that had been trapped inside needing escape. Ezra moved to open windows, knowing Kaylee would appreciate the cooler night air when she slept. When he turned back from the windows, she was at the couch, shaking out the sheet that had never been put away.

"Kaylee?" he said.

Kaylee turned to him.

"Are you planning on sleeping on the couch?"

She looked down at her hands, the sheet, as if just realizing what she was doing for the first time.

Ezra took the sheet from her hands and tossed it aside on the couch. He took her hands in his. A smile played at his lips as he looked at his bride. He started walking backwards toward the bedroom, keeping both her hands in his and bringing her along with him.

Some of the tension of the interaction with Vin eased from her face. Ezra stopped inside what had been his room alone.

"So tell me," he said. "Did you ever figure out what you're supposed to wear under a dress like that?"

Kaylee's cheeks flushed pink, but her mouth quirked in a smile and her eyes glinted with teasing. "You could find out," she said.

Ezra tugged her closer, planning to do that.

#

Something drew Ezra from his sound sleep. Groggily, he felt Kaylee thrash around again. It was nearly a nightly occurrence with her. Ezra reached out for her, pulling her towards him, a weight on his legs hindering his movement. Ezra opened his eyes and lifted his head from his pillow to see Kaylee's dog laying across his legs. The dog ignored Ezra's grunt of annoyance, his ears pricked forward and eyes on Kaylee. The dog whined and looked to Ezra.

"I've got her," Ezra said before he caught himself. He didn't owe the animal any explanations. The dog's tail thumped softly at Ezra's reassurance and he laid his head back down.

Ezra pulled Kaylee against him, her breath coming quickly in her sleep as she flailed against Ezra. He wrapped his arms more securely around her. It was usually all it took to calm her when she grew restless in her sleep. She would let out a soft sigh of relief and tuck in against him, settling to sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.

Tonight, though, she fought against him, starting to murmur words that built into fearful questions.

"Is she ok? Is she breathing?"

"Kaylee," Ezra said against her ear, tightening his hold on her. "Wake up. It's just a dream."

"She's not breathing," Kaylee said, her eyes flying open and pulling away from Ezra's arms, looking around the darkened room wildly as she jolted upright.

Ezra pushed up to sitting, reaching out a hand to Kaylee's shoulder, bare where his oversized button up shirt was falling off. Her hands were lost in the sleeves that were too long, but she shoved her hair back out of her face, taking a shaky breath.

Ezra thought of one of Kaylee's first nights in his camper. He had heard her out on the couch, crying out with those same questions in her sleep. This time, though, he was able to have his arms around her. And this time, when she woke up, disoriented and panicked, Ezra could ask.

"Who is the dream about?" he asked.

Kaylee swallowed hard, shook her head. "It's just…" The breath she drew in was shaky. "Bad memories."

She let Ezra pull her to his side, leaning against him as he leaned back against the headboard. Ezra ran his hand lightly over her arm, waiting for her to offer more.

"In Nebraska, back home…" she started, then trailed off. Her jaw clenched, her entire body tightened and Ezra tried keep his own body relaxed, be a safe place for whatever it was she was avoiding.

"My mom was into drugs. Pills, heroin." She kept her gaze fixed somewhere in the dark room. "She looked a lot like Vin did tonight more often than not." Her jaw worked, her throat convulsed as she swallowed hard. Ezra didn't move. "There would be men trying to bring her home. Bringing her home and hanging around our house."

Ezra didn't want to imagine what Kaylee had gone through with strange men in her home.

"My mom needed me. She told me that. Told me I had to take care of her, help her." Her hands found their way to her face and her words were muffled behind her hands. "Told me if she overdosed because I left her, it would be my fault."

Whatever Maude had said to Ezra during the years, she had never pinned her fortunes on him. Ezra let out a long breath, at a loss for words, something that didn't happen to him.

Kaylee wouldn't look at him. "But I can't go back," she said. "Not back to always worrying about her, dragging her home, kicking those guys out, making sure she's eating. Making sure she's breathing."

"Your home is with me now," Ezra said quietly.

"What I did to try to make sure we had food and heat…I just…" She started to pull away from him then. "I don't want to think about any of that." She spoke almost too quietly for him to hear.

"You don't owe me any explanations," Ezra said. He couldn't imagine Kaylee doing anything too outside the law to provide for her and her mom. And that was in the past. He wanted her to feel safe with him. With a future.

Kaylee looked at him then, hope evident on her face even in the dark. "That's all in the past," she said, though there wasn't any strong conviction in her words.

"In the past," he echoed, willing her to feel his certainty.

She finally let out a long sigh, dropping her head against his shoulder. Ezra pressed a kiss to the top of her head, his fingers brushing over her silky hair. He held her, running a hand over her arm, listening to her breathing until it finally calmed, slowing to a cadence of sleep.

He sat with her in his arms, feeling every breath that moved her and thinking about what she had been running from, vowing to make sure she never had to go back to that.

#