I wanted to thank everyone who has been reading this story. I appreciate your support so much and want you to know that. :)

Chapter 50

Ezra stared up at the dark ceiling overhead. He kicked off the blankets and tossed over, trying to get comfortable.

He had been sleeping in the spare room for the past 6 weeks since Kaylee left and the mattress was still as uncomfortable as it had been the first night.

He shifted again, but the cold space in the bed alongside him was only highlighted in the dim moonlight coming in through the window.

A low whine sounded from the floor. Ezra sat up and the dog copied the move, pushing up to sitting from where he had been sprawled next to the bed.

Ezra ran a hand through his hair. Dragged it over his face. Felt the rough stubble against his hand.

Barney whined again, lifting his head and dropping it on the edge of the bed.

Ezra kicked his legs over the side of the bed. "Alright, let's go," he said. He glanced at the time on his phone. Four am. It wasn't any worse than his usual sleepless nights. He could check on the horses.

The lab stayed by Ezra's side as he went downstairs. He pulled on boots and a jacket over his sweatpants and t-shirt.

He scowled at the wreath on his front door when he closed it behind him. JD had hung it and it only served to remind Ezra that Christmas Eve was tomorrow.

"Bah humbug," he muttered to himself.

Barney ran ahead of him to roll in the snow.

Ezra stepped inside the quiet horse barn. Kaylee's mare stuck her head out into the aisle.

Ezra paused and scratched the horse between the ears, firmly shutting a mental door on thoughts of all the times he had brushed the horse, saddled her, been with her while Kaylee prepared at a rodeo, cooled her down then celebrated a win with Kaylee. No, he wasn't going to think about any of that.

He rubbed the horse's nose. It wasn't the mare's fault her owner was a lying thief.

Not for the first time, Ezra wondered how in the world Kaylee had a performance horse worth tens of thousands of dollars. He could imagine how she had lied and cheated her way into ownership.

Ezra gave the horse one final scratch. Buck and JD had come over regularly to ride Kaylee's horse and exercise the mare, something Ezra hadn't been able to bring himself to do. Not that he had told anyone that. But Buck had seemed to figure it out and made sure the mare was still cared for.

Buck. The thought of the incorrigible ladies' man apparently settled in with one woman lightened Ezra's mood slightly. Inez had been good for Buck. No one could quite figure out what their arrangement actually was, but Buck was happy. As far as Ezra knew, Buck was still sleeping on the couch alone, and his smile was broader than ever. Whatever was going on between Buck and Inez, it seemed to be working.

Ezra tried not to let that lead to thoughts of his own inability to find happiness. For someone who prided himself on his ability to read people, he had failed miserably.

Ezra went to Chaucer and rested his head against the horse's neck. He had everything he had worked for. Money, his own ranch, a thriving business. And it didn't matter.

He never should have risked his heart.

#

Kaylee rolled over in bed. She pulled the blanket over her head.

She should be used to the loneliness by now. Her heart should be beating again.

She should be able to get out of bed.

Kaylee closed her eyes. She wished she could cry. She wished she could feel anything.

She laid there, listening to the wind buffet the thin walls of the trailer. The propane tank was probably getting close to empty. Next paycheck she would have to see how many gallons she could buy. Right now she was keeping the heat turned as low as she dared. Too low and their pipes would freeze. That was a costly mistake she had made during high school, and she wasn't about to repeat it. Not when plumbers cost a fortune.

She burrowed farther under her blanket. She thought of Ezra, all the times he would pull her into his arms, she could burrow into his warmth, hear his heartbeat, feel it beating slow and steady against her cheek.

Not feeling was probably a good thing. It spared her the pain that would tear her in two if she let herself miss Ezra.

Kaylee risked stretching an arm out from under her blankets. She felt on her rickety nightstand until her hand reached her phone and pulled it under the blankets with her to see the time.

Five am. She should get up and get ready for work.

She wondered what would happen if she gave up. Just stayed in bed and stopped trying.

A small stir of movement, nothing more than butterfly wings, fluttered in her abdomen.

Kaylee heaved a sigh. She couldn't give up. Not while she was carrying Ezra's baby.

Another reality she didn't want to think about.

She reluctantly freed herself from the blankets and pushed up to the edge of the bed. It took whatever bit of willpower she still had to stand and move to the small closet.

She avoided looking at her protruding stomach when she took off her nightshirt and traded it for one of her work shirts—a t-shirt with bleach stains. Her t-shirt pulled across her stomach. Her jeans didn't button, and she used the same rubber band she had been using to link the button to the buttonhole. She pulled a sweatshirt over her head, but it's bagginess wasn't enough to hide her pregnancy anymore. The past month had expanded her stomach more than the previous months all together. Suddenly she looked pregnant. She felt the baby moving most days. She couldn't ignore it.

Kaylee swallowed hard. Her pregnancy kept progressing, whether she was prepared for the changes or not.

But she still had at least a few months. She didn't have to think about it today.

Kaylee pulled on a pair of wool socks, socks Ezra had got for her when he had ordered a full supply of winter clothes for her. One more thing Kaylee would have to remember to repay him for.

Pulling her hair back in a low ponytail and pulling a stocking cap down on her head, Kaylee left her room.

Tammy was sprawled out on the couch, mouth open in a deep sleep that Kaylee knew was drug-induced. She stopped and knelt down next to the couch, felt for the pulse at her mom's wrist. Counted her respirations.

Her pulse and breathing was reassuring. Tammy was fine. She would be able to sleep this off and wake up sometime this afternoon.

The remnants of a joint were in the ashtray, a leftover dusting of powder on the surface of the coffee table. Tammy's friend—Georgia? Gina?—was draped across the armchair, eyes closed, breathing regular.

Kaylee bypassed the kitchen, no appetite to eat in the trailer. She pulled on her jacket and went outside, closing the door quietly behind her, not that even a slamming door would wake Tammy or her friend.

She got in the truck, but didn't start it. She stared blankly at the snow covered yard around the trailer. The Nebraska prairie stretching out under moonlight in every direction. Nothing as far as she could see.

#

"What are you thinking about?"

Chris turned from the window where he was staring out at the snow coming down. He looked down at Mary.

"Kaylee?" she guessed.

Chris grunted in response. Mary placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, massaging tight muscles.

"No one's heard from her," he said. He saw his own worry reflected in Mary's blue eyes.

"She hasn't even texted Vin?" Mary asked.

Vin and Kaylee had been close, everyone had seen that. If she was going to text anyone, it should have been Vin. But Chris wondered if it was good she hadn't texted Vin. Not with the way Vin was looking like a ghost wandering a graveyard—a homeless soul—since Inez moved in with Buck. Not with the way he had looked at Kaylee, even knowing she was married to Ezra.

But Kaylee had texted Chris. Just that one text over a month ago. When he had told her she should come home. And she hadn't answered.

She had texted Chris and he hadn't managed to get her home. Hadn't even managed to get a response from her.

"Why don't I give Hunter Terrence a call?" Mary suggested. "He didn't have any of her information when I emailed him last month. But maybe he can think of someone Kaylee was close to. Someone who might know where she would go."

Chris nodded. He didn't like thinking of Kaylee on her own. Not when he also knew there was someone after her. And that was all they knew.

"If Ezra wasn't such a damn idiot, she wouldn't be on her own," Chris said. It wasn't the first time he had given the frustration voice. And it wasn't the first time Mary had answered him evenly.

"Ezra was hurt. You know he doesn't give his heart easily. He felt betrayed."

Chris knew that. And he knew the lengths a man could go to in the midst of grief and hurt.

Mary's arms came around him, her head resting on his shoulder.

He held Mary securely. He never wanted to go to that dark place himself again.

#

"Vin!"

Vin stopped his walk to the barns and turned at the call.

The sun was high overhead, glaringly bright off the snow that had fallen earlier. He squinted, lifting a hand to shade his eyes.

Mary was coming toward him.

He had known she was at Chris'. He had seen her car. It was why he had been spending most the day in the barns. Trying to give Buck and Inez space had meant he was spending more time up at Chris'. But then trying to avoid being in the way when Mary was over left him with the barns as his refuge.

Vin walked toward her. "Can I do somethin' for you?" he asked. Mary didn't usually seek him out.

Her expression was drawn, concern pulling at her lips. Vin felt his own frown in response.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "Is Billy—?"

Mary quickly shook her head. "Billy's fine. He's with Orrin and Kathryn for a few days." She looked up at him, her blue eyes still filled with worry, not exactly setting Vin's mind at ease. "It's Kaylee."

Vin's stomach dropped. He braced himself.

"Nothing's wrong," Mary quickly assured him, reaching out a hand to his arm.

"You've heard from her then?" he asked, still not reassured.

"No," Mary said with a shake of her head.

Of course not. No one had. Vin didn't know why he had felt a flare of hope. All he wanted at this point was word that she was ok. She was safe.

"But I contacted a colleague of mine. He knew Kaylee when she was riding on his circuit."

"He knows where she is?" Vin asked, that foolish hope lifting again.

"He gave me the number for a barrel racer who knew Kaylee. She didn't have a lot of information, but she knew what town Kaylee's from."

"She might not be there," Vin said.

"You sound exactly like Chris," Mary said, lifting an eyebrow that spoke of her lack of patience with Vin and Chris' voices of doom and gloom. "It's the best information we've found so far."

It was. "Someone needs to go there," Vin said.

Mary's lips thinned. "Chris is thinking of going."

Vin frowned deeply. "He'll…"

"Scare her away from ever coming back," Mary finished what Vin was thinking.

"Yeah." Vin knew Chris was just as worried as the rest of them about Kaylee. But he also knew the man's hard edges and silence left Kaylee assuming he was thinking the worst when he was near her.

"I thought maybe you could go," Mary said. "I know you and she are close."

Not close enough for Kaylee to tell Vin what she was scared of. Who she was sending Ezra's money to. But he was already nodding. There was no way he wouldn't go. "I'll leave today," he said. He was used to throwing some clothes in a duffel and taking off to rodeos. He could leave within the hour.

Mary didn't look surprised by his answer. "I'll text you the town name. It's Dry Grass, Nebraska."

Vin nodded, his plans for the horses in the barn already forgotten. He started toward the bunkhouse, stopped and called back to Mary. "Thanks, Mary."

Mary nodded. "I hope you find her, Vin. Tell her we all want her home."

Vin nodded again and picked up his pace toward his house.

He opened the door and ducked his head, intending to head straight to his room to pack, when he saw Inez and Buck together on the couch.

"Hi, Vin," Inez said warmly.

Vin had to give her credit. She was a nice lady. She had been going out of her way in the month she'd been there to try to make sure it was clear she wasn't intent on taking over Vin and Buck's space.

Vin gave her a slight dip of his head in greeting and kept going toward his room.

"What's lit a fire under you?" Buck asked, shifting away from Inez and sitting up straighter.

Vin paused long enough to answer Buck. He knew Buck cared about Kaylee as deeply as anyone.

"Mary found the town where Kaylee might be."

Buck levered his lanky frame up from the couch. "You going?" he asked.

Vin gave a single nod and headed toward his room, Buck on his heels.

"Did Mary find out how she's doing? What she's doing?"

Vin pulled his worn duffel bag from his closet. "She don't know anything," he said. He took some shirts form his dresser and stuck them in the duffel bag. "Just got the name of the town Kaylee's from."

Buck handed Vin the sweatshirt laying on the end of the bed and Vin added it to his bag. "Well, that's a start," Buck said, hope lifting his voice.

"It's more than we've had to go on till now," Vin agreed.

"Did anyone tell Ezra?" Buck asked.

Vin slanted a look at him.

"Yeah," Buck said. "He's not really open to talking about her."

That was an understatement. The last time Buck had made the mistake of suggesting Ezra find out where Kaylee went, Ezra had taken off to a backroom poker table in Denver and no one had heard from him for three days straight.

"What are you gonna do when you find her?" Buck asked.

"Make sure she's alright," Vin answered automatically. That was what he needed more than anything. To know that Kaylee was safe. That whatever—whoever—she was running from hadn't caught up with her.

"Yeah," Buck agreed. Vin could see how heavily worry for Kaylee weighed on Buck. It was heavy on all of them. Christmas Eve was tomorrow and there had been a heavy conversation in the barns earlier in the week about Kaylee missing from their Christmas. Wondering if she was going to be alone for the holiday.

Vin would be there by Christmas. He would find her. The rest he would figure out once he knew she was safe.

"You need anything?" Buck asked.

Vin zipped his duffel closed. "Got everything I need." His truck was old, but reliable. Living simply and winning multiple national rodeo titles had left him with plenty of money in the bank. All he needed was to find Kaylee.

"You call if you need something. If she needs anything," Buck said.

Vin hefted his bag to his shoulder, feeling the pull of his healed ribs. "I will."

Vin went through the living room. Inez approached him, a Tupperware container in her hands.

"In case you get hungry," she said, holding it out to him.

Vin had learned the best part of the day was Inez' meals, so he didn't refuse the gesture. "Thanks, ma'am."

Buck reached for Vin's heavier coat and opened the door, following after Vin with a quiet word to Inez that he'd be right back in.

Vin tossed his bag on the passenger seat and Buck dropped the coat on top of the bag.

"I'm real glad you got Inez," Vin said honestly. "She's somethin' special."

Buck didn't look like he even tried to hold back his grin. "She sure is." His grin sobered. "I know it's been a change, havin' her living in the house with us. I appreciate you bein' so good to her."

Vin shook off the thanks. "She should be there. You need to be near her. Near your baby when its born." It still felt strange to say the words out loud. To think of Buck as a dad. The familiar loneliness settled in with Vin. "When I get back, I'm going to look for a place of my own."

Buck looked more surprised than Vin thought he should. "Why would you do something stupid like that?" he demanded.

Vin smiled in spite of the ache in his chest. He and Buck had bunked together for more years than Vin could count offhand. "You and Inez don't need me camping out when you're trying to get your feet under you. You need your space."

"Like hell I do," Buck retorted. But Vin could see the thought setting in with Buck. Understanding dawning.

"I'll call when I find Kaylee," Vin said, closing the door on any more arguments. He had known for awhile this was the logical progression of things once Inez had moved in. He had just pushed aside the knowledge.

"Tell her we miss her," Buck said. "And then haul her home where she belongs."

Vin grinned. He doubted hogtying and tossing Kaylee in the truck was going to end well, but he appreciated Buck's ambition.

Vin climbed into his truck and started it up. Buck stepped back from the truck.

Vin pulled out, seeing Buck and the house he had lived in for the past several years fading in the distance until he rounded the bend of Chris' drive and it was gone from sight.

#

Mary watched Vin's truck head down the long drive toward the dirt road. She let out a long breath. She hoped he could find Kaylee. And she hoped he could bring the younger woman home where she belonged. Mary had been listening to Chris opine on all the ways he'd like to kill Ezra for the past month and a half. But she had also heard the heaviness in his voice when he worried about Ezra. Chris knew how dark the days could be after losing someone you loved, and she knew he was hurting for Ezra.

She turned away from the window to see Chris head towards his room. She drew in the breath she had just let out and squared her shoulders. She followed after him.

Chris was pulling out the bag he packed for rodeos.

"Where are you going?" she asked as if she didn't know.

Chris barely spared her a glance. "I'll see if Kaylee went back to where she's from. Now that you found that out, shouldn't be hard to find her."

Mary knew this man well. She knew how deeply he cared for those he considered family even if he couldn't speak the words. And she knew how much it irked him to sit around helpless. She chose her words carefully.

"Vin's going after her," she said.

Chris looked at her sharply. Mary kept her expression even. "He and Kaylee are close. I told him where she's from and he headed out just a bit ago."

Chris' face hardened. She didn't know why Vin going after Kaylee would darken his expression, and she didn't push. Not now, when all their emotions were raw with watching Ezra's self-loathing take over, and worrying over Kaylee.

"I'll call Vin. Go with him. Keep an eye on…things," Chris said. Decision made, he went to his dresser and started grabbing clothes.

Ok. She was going to have to be direct. She blocked him when he turned back toward the bed with his clothes. "I don't think that's a good idea."

Chris narrowed his eyes at her. Mary lifted her chin slightly. "We all want her back home. I know you do, just as much as anyone. But I don't think it's a good idea for you to go after her."

"Why the hell not?" Chris demanded.

Mary pressed her lips together to hold back the smile that threatened. She had never met someone with so little awareness of how terrifying he could be. She tread gently again.

"Because I would assume she's feeling vulnerable, and she doesn't always understand where you're coming from."

"Where I'm coming from?" Chris repeated after her with a scowl.

Mary lifted a hand to Chris' face, hoping the gesture would soften her words. "I think you'll scare her."

The ferocious look on Chris' face would have had any other woman—and most men—quailing. Mary lifted her other hand to brush hair that was a few weeks past needing a cut back from his forehead. "We all know you and know you mean well. But I don't think Kaylee always knows that. Vin is better at talking to her than you are."

She kept her hand on his cheek, kept brushing at his hair until his shoulders finally dropped. He tossed the clothes on his bed, but didn't make a move to put them in the bag.

"I know," she said, answering the unspoken words she knew were in him. "We're all worried about her. And Ezra."

Chris heaved a weary sigh and lowered his forehead to rest against hers. Mary closed her eyes and kept her fingers moving across his skin in a soothing rhythm.

"You want to go pick up Billy from Orrin's and take him snowshoeing in the hills?" Chris asked.

Mary would have agreed to anything that would get his mind off his inability to help Ezra or Kaylee right then. "He'd love that," she said. She pressed her lips to his softly.

#

Kaylee wished she hadn't agreed to stay late at the motel. But it was better than being at home. And it wasn't like she didn't need the money.

She might as well clean the registration office. She only had a half hour left, then she could flip the lights off and head home. Then come back and do it all again tomorrow.

She heaved a sigh and went over to the small radio that only picked up two stations. She turned it on, the quiet sounds of Morgan Wallen singing about heartache breaking the silence of the office. She got a dusting rag and spray and started on the shelves behind the desk. She tossed outdated newspapers in the recycling bin under the desk and moved to the next shelf.

Lights swept across the office and she glanced out at the parking lot to see a truck swinging into the lot from the highway.

It was ten o'clock at night, but occasionally a traveler would pull in when they realized they were just too tired to keep driving. They would pause at the hotel for a night, then continue on to where they actually wanted to be.

Kaylee couldn't see the truck past the glare of the headlights through the window, but whoever it was would be inside soon enough. She set aside her rag and went to get a key for one of the vacant rooms.

There wasn't a bell to give a merry jingle when the door opened. Just the sound of the endless winter wind blowing outside that came in with whatever cold air chased a person inside.

Kaylee turned towards the door, trying to look less exhausted than she felt.

She froze.

There wasn't—she didn't—she couldn't— Her mind reeled.

"Vin?" she finally managed, but she didn't know if the word came out or her lips soundlessly moved. She fought the need to run—both away from him and toward him.

His face was lined with worry, but eased some when she spoke.

"Hey," he said.

#