Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story.
First time writer, longtime reader. I recently found Scorpion on Paramount+ and I fell in love with Walter and Paige. I was listening to the song Haven by Gabriel Thomas Broussard and I got inspired to write this one shot. I've been writing a lot of stories for these two lately. I'll hopefully be finishing soon.
Sitting in the dark with a single candle burning
Lost in thought while the whole world keeps on turning
I wish someone could break me out of my head
I need a saving grace, a hiding place instead
I need a haven
A cease in the silence
A break in the violence
Praying for relief
Why does it feel like nothing turns out right
And if it does I wake up every time
My soul is past the point of breaking
I need a haven
Everybody seems to know just what I'm feeling
But they don't feel the way I know I do
Please Jesus, I know you can hear me
I need a haven to save
Lord could it be you
"Walter?" Cabe steps in the entrance of the loft. He hasn't heard from him in a few days after deciding to take a sabbatical from Scorpion. Cabe reached for the light switch
"Don't." Cabe is able to make the out the line of Walter's body on the couch in the dark accompanied by the light of his laptop resting on the coffee table.
"Son, what are you doing in the dark?" He asked using the light from the laptop to make his way to the genius.
"I can't turn it off." Walter scratches his head.
"Turn what off?"
"My mind. Ever since Paige left I've thrown myself into work. But I can't keep going on like this. I didn't have all these feeling before she came into my life and I can't undo this."
"Walt, when was the last time you slept?"
"What day is it?"
"Saturday."
He counts on his fingers, "Wednesday, I think."
"Okay, I'm going to take you somewhere you can eat and get some rest." Putting one arm underneath his shoulder, Cabe helps Walter down the stairs and into the car. He needs to get him some help. After 15 minutes of driving, Cabe pulls into the parking lot, getting Walter from the front seat, he guides him into the hospital. "Excuse me, I need to get this man seen as soon as possible." He flashed his badge to the nurse.
"Give me ten minutes, sir." Cabe stands at the nurses' station watching Walter mumbling to himself. He's never seen the kid like this. He heard Happy talking about the rabbit hole, but Walter wasn't focused on work.
"Walter?" The exhausted genius opens his eyes.
"Vadat?" Walter tries his best to fix himself in front of one of the board member of the Vor Collective.
"Are you okay? You look awful."
"Because that's what every sick person wants to hear." Cabe interrupts the two.
The shorter man gives a short look to the older man before looking back to Walter, "Give me a call when you get better I have a few things I'd like to talk to you about and give Ms. Dineen my best."
Walter watches the man he once craved acceptance from exit the hospital. The mention of Paige made the pain dig deeper in his chest. Every time he closed his eyes she was there. It brought peace that was soon followed by pain. She was in his dreams that he would pause and replay. When he woke he felt the heartache all over again. It was his own personal brand of hell. Having her then losing her. Over and over again. If he didn't sleep he wouldn't have to feel the up and down. He needs a constant, even if it was misery.
"Mr. O'Brien." The nurse cuts through the noise in his head.
"Come on kid." Cabe helps him to his room.
Waiting for the doctor to arrive he feels a dizzy spell wash over him. The light always made the spinning worse.
"Ms. Dineen." She remembers that voice. Turning away from the vegetables, a short man makes his way down the aisle.
"Vadat. How are you doing?" She looks to her shopping cart and back to the acquaintance of her ex.
"I'm well. I thought I'd ask how Walter was doing. He looked awful at the hospital. I thought he was going to drop dead on the floor." The concerned look in his eye was met by her confused one.
"I'm sorry, I don't understand. Walter was in the hospital?" She didn't let thoughts of him linger too often since the break up. If she did, anger would fill her veins followed by guilt. She still loved him. Of course she still loved him. She meant it when she told him he was the love of her life. When he told her about Flo, her fight or flight instincts both came to surface. She wanted to hurt him the way she was hurting, but she never wanted harm to come to him.
"I thought you would know being his girlfriend." Guilt was written on his face like he just let someone's secret spill.
"When was he at the hospital?" She doesn't hide the worry in her voice.
"Last night. He was with that man who came with you to the tech convention."
Cabe. She could always call him to find out what happened. "Do you know what happened?"
"No, I'm sorry. I told him to call me when he got better, but I doubt he remembers. He was talking to himself when I left him."
"Thank you." She left her cart in the aisle and left for the car. Pulling her phone out of her purse, her finger hovers over the Homeland agents number. They haven't spoken in three weeks.
"Paige?"
"Hey Cabe. How are you doing?"
"I've had better days." The agent sounded tired. He probably stayed with Walt all night to take care of him.
"How is he?" They both knew who she was talking about, but Cabe hesitated. He didn't know how long Walter would be asleep, he knew if he told her where they were she would come and he wasn't sure how welcome she would be when he woke up.
"Also seen better days."
"Cabe."
"He's in the hospital."
"I'm on my way." Her heart cracked at the confirmation she feared. She broke a few speeding laws.
She is beautiful. After surviving a sunken submarine and an explosion they were on the rooftop dancing with "Dancing in the Moonlight" by King Harvest playing through the speaker. The smile of joy that painted across her face was burned into his memory. He rewinds the memory just to see her smile again. He loved dancing with her, holding her close. She was the only person he ever met who gave him peace. She was his calm in the storm. He hurt her and disappointed her. There is constant reminder that he failed her.
"I am completely exhausted trying to convince myself that you satisfy me!"
No, this wasn't what he wanted to remember. Wake up!
"Wake up!" The bright light burns his eye. He looked around at the sterile white walls. When did he get here? He can't sleep. The nightmares plague him.
"Walter, what are you doing? What's wrong?" Cabe enters the room.
"I can't sleep." His eyes are wide with fear.
"You have to. I found you in your loft dehydrated and delirious. You're going to work yourself to death."
"You—you don't understand."
"Walt, you're heartbroken, I get it."
"No, you don't!"
"Explain it then."
"Every time I close my eyes she's there. I remember every single detail, Cabe. Imagine you're living your dream only to wake up to a nightmare. It is hell. I can't get away from her. Everywhere I go there is a memory with her woven into it. I've lost her a million times in here." He points to his head. "I can't handle the highs and lows anymore, they're happening too fast. I feel like I'm going crazy." The knock on the door silences him. Her face appearing in the window takes the air out of his lungs. "Am I hallucinating or is Paige really there?"
"She is really there." Cabe replies as she opens the door.
"Hey." She stops just before the sink the nurse used to wash her hands. "When I heard you were in the hospital I came to check on you."
"Um thank you, but I'm not staying here." He pulls the IV from his arm.
"I-I don't think you're supposed to pull those out like that." He continues to pull the wires that are monitoring his vitals. "Walter, stop." She puts her hand on his to stop his movement.
"I'm fine." He freezes, he hasn't felt her hands in a month. She is his own personal heroin. He would pull millions of needles out of his veins if she would just keep touching him.
"Your appearance is telling a different story." She takes in the black circles and bags under his eyes. The color is completely drained from his face and his skin is clammy. "What happened?"
He loves that she's here, but he hates that she will leave. She won't come home. He'll go back to the loft all alone. He studies her face committing it to memory. She's perfect.
"He hasn't—" Cabe started.
"I haven't finished cleaning up some cords in the garage and I fell." She could tell he wasn't telling her the truth, but consider how fragile he looked she didn't want to push it.
It's the first time he's felt at peace since they were last together. His heart should be breaking in her presence, instead it's like a person wondering the desert and they finally find a drop of water. He's grateful for any drop of her he can get. "Do you mind if I sit for a while?" She asks.
"Not at all." Walter gestures to the chair resting in the corner.
"I'm going to go find a nurse to put those IVs back in." Cabe stands to leave the former couple to talk.
"How have you been?" Walter ask when finds his voice.
"I've," She struggles with what to tell him. Truth is, it's been hell. Does she save face or tell him the truth? That her pride has kept her from reaching out to him. "I've seen better days." Stealing Cabe's response from earlier. "You?"
"I've picked up the research from Megan's MS just trying to stay busy. I think I've made some real strides." I'm falling apart. "Ralph, how is he?"
"He's been busy with his college courses for the summer. Still nursing his heartbreak from Patty." We've both been binge watch horror films and eating ice cream to cope.
"He'll find someone someday." And hopefully he won't be an idiot like me.
It's been a week since Walter left the hospital. Cabe stayed at the loft to keep an eye on him. Now that he seemed to be on the mend Cabe had a few words to share with man he considered his kid, "Son, I understand that you're hurting and I hate it. You're right I'll never understand what heartbreak is like in that head of yours. But you got to experience something most don't ever get to. You fell in love. Sometimes it does hurt like hell. But there was a moment in time where you got to love and be loved." He watched Walter stare at his cup of coffee. Cabe knew he was listening by the thoughtful look in his eye so he kept going, "In life you're going to hit road blocks and sometimes you'll crash into them going 100 miles an hour. Right now though, you're still alive. There is a chance for you to try to fix it; instead of locking yourself in the loft and driving yourself crazy. You get to decide what you're going to do. You go to her or let her go. Both are a risk. It just depends on which one you're willing to take."
"Pain is the price you pay for love."
"What?"
"Something Paige told me once." Walter breaks his gaze from his mug to look at the agent.
"She's a smart woman, who loves you. Don't take that for granted. As someone who lost one love of his life, don't be a dumbass. Take a leap of faith." Cabe nods to the car keys in the bowl on the book shelf.
"She said I could never satisfy her Cabe. Why would she want to take me back?" He ask rubbing a hand down his face.
"Everyone says things they regret in the heat of the moment, son. But you have to talk to her. You didn't hear her on the phone when she called about you being the hospital and you don't see the way she looks at you. You'll never get the chance to know, if you don't go to her."
"Thanks Cabe." He runs out the door.
The knocking on her door woke her up. "I'm coming." She rushes to the entrance of her apartment as the knocking becomes more frantic. "I'm— Walter? What are you doing here?"
His eyes are red from tears, his clothes soaked from running into the sprinklers outside, and his gasping for air after running up her stairs. He's never felt more out of sorts than he did right now. "I can't sleep. I can't eat."
"I don't understand." Confusion is written on her face.
"When you came to the hospital you asked me what happened. I lied. I can't sleep and I can't eat. I'm feeling all these emotions and I can't turn them off anymore and I—I can't work them away." He takes a deep breath, "You know Paige, I've gone back and forth on this over and over replaying every second since we met when I'm awake and when I'm asleep, you're everywhere. Anytime I close my eyes I forget that I not waking up to you and-and when I wake up there is a cloud of grief that follows me." A watery grin began to grow on his face,"I thought at first I regretted us trying because of everything I've lost, you, Ralph, and Scorpion. But, the more I thought about it the more I realized that I was wrong. We took a risk and yes I'm still wholly wrecked from it but, I wouldn't trade the time we were together for anything. I-I know things may have changed for you but, you should know I'm still completely and insanely in love with you. And-and your dad was right, pain is the price you pay for love. So, even if I only had you for a little while it will always be the best time of my life because you are my haven." Tears have welled in the corner of her eyes. She tried to take a deep breath to dampen them, but they fall. "I-I just wanted you to know."
"When did you get so good at impassioned speeches?" She says swiping the tears away.
"It's okay to show emotions for the people you love. At least, that's what someone very wise and very smart said once." She gives him a knowing smile, letting him know she remembers telling him those words. "I'm sorry if I disrupted your evening."
"No, you didn't. Do you want to come in?" She opens the door wider, inviting him in.
"I'd like that." Smiling he step in through the threshold.
Pulling on his arm before he can put distance between them, crashing their lips together. "You should know, I'm still completely and insanely in love with you too."