Chapter XXII

My Precious World to Me

Waiting for the night to cover the Village Hidden in the Leaves with its veil of darkness, I started reading to occupy myself. I could leave now, but I prefer to delay a little longer to make sure I don't encounter any potential curious eyes on the way … at least, the best I can. Since we've been alone in this room, Naruto has been content to find some semblance of sleep. He keeps one eye open; if I try to free my hand from his, he only squeezes it tighter, forcing a sigh out of me. I can't wait to get home to rest; with my student, I doubt that's possible. Not to mention that hunger must occupy his exhausted mind…

Cautious knocks on the door take my nose out of my book; same with Naruto, though his heart races silently unlike me. The door opens slowly to leave only a brief gap. I recognize Sakura, visibly nervous, her gaze avoiding us.

A silence. She hesitates to speak.

"Kakashi-sensei, may I come in?"

I nod. She must know about this whole situation; her presence does not surprise me. Since Naruto is in no condition to lose his temper again, I take the risk of letting her approach. Perhaps seeing him like this will calm the anxieties that must be tormenting the young girl.

Sakura nods back and slowly walks into the room after closing behind her. She tries not to rush her unstable comrade, aware of his condition. She takes a few steps forward, but keeps an acceptable distance. Nevertheless, this intrusion causes Naruto to squeeze my hand to the point of causing bearable pain; at that, thin shivers betray his anxiety. I suppress a grimace.

"It's going to be alright, Naruto. She's a friend," I reassure him in a soft voice. "She's not there to hurt you."

The sapphire-eyed boy stops torturing my palm, but he remains vigilant; suspicious, he does not take his eyes off her. His black tail curls around our legs, surrounding them as if trying to impose an invisible barrier between us and Sakura.

"Master Tsunade told me about it," she confirms after observing the blond's strange behaviour. "She wants me to lend a hand once Naruto is less … feral."

Her voice betrays an ache in his heart.

"Indeed. You're in the best position to help him regain his memory. Much more than me if it wasn't for the affection he has for me."

I look at Naruto.

"I hope he'll be calmer around other people. Once this step done, we will move on to the next … with great caution, that said. Rushing him could have serious consequences on his psyche."

"Do you think he will remember us one day?" she asks me, saddened.

"It's too early to know, Sakura. However, a part of him is still there although it's in an unconscious and abstract way. All Naruto need for now is patience and time."

Sakura tightens her chest for a breath. She shakes her head and shoos the cockroaches away on her own to show a happier countenance. Obviously, she pushes back negative emotions and if she had entered with that beaming face, I would have believed it. She takes a few steps forward and bends down to Naruto's level who arches a bit in response.

"Naruto, when you're ready, I'll be there for you," she tells him with a sincere smile. "We just want to help you."

He listens to her in silence, but his feeling of mistrust persists. As my student has always done, she puts the needs of others before her own; in this context, it is an obligation. Sakura can only submit to the feral boy's rhythm so as not to be blacklisted.

"If he gets comfortable with Shikamaru, we can start introducing him to someone new. One at a time will save him anxiety since he has become very prone to stress."

She stands up, nodding.

"I'm counting on you, Kakashi-sensei."

"It's not like I had a choice," I sigh.

"And your chakra? Will you be okay?"

"With plenty of rest and Godaime's medication, I should be fine."

The kunoichi can't help but look at me with concern.

"You should go home, Sakura. It's late and we shouldn't take long either…"

"Be careful, you two."

I greet her with a nod as the girl turns on her heels to leave. Although Naruto was nervous, he tolerated her; I don't know if it's due to his amorphous state or if he has potentially lowered his barriers… I can't say.

I wait several long minutes before putting my book back in my pocket.

"Wake up, Naruto. It's time for us to go," I tell him, gently pushing him away.

He understands that he has to pull away from me to allow me to get up, but again and again he refuses to release my hand. Slowly, the blond imitates me. However, his legs wobble too much; he struggles to keep his balance and his little eyes have lost their liveliness. I feel as if he sleeps standing up and as after his fury, he is content to obey me with automatic movements devoid of any will. Needless to say, Naruto won't be capable of walking to my home.

"You have to let go of my hand, Naruto. Otherwise, I won't be able to carry you."

He's barely awake and he doesn't react—rather, he gazes into the void in front of him. I sigh heavily. I turn and bend over to present my back to him—something that briefly twists my arm because of the awkward, clingy grip of my student.

"Get on. I'm taking us home," I tell him aloud.

Over my shoulder, I see the blond with an unsteady posture trying to assimilate what I just said to him.

"Naruto!"

When I raise my voice, his eyes widen. He takes a moment to observe me, analyze the situation. Then, to my great relief, he finally let go of my hand to fall on top of me before gently squeezing my neck. His static-covered hair tickles the back of my neck as I feel his breath in a steady rhythm. As I wrap my arms around his legs for support, his ebony tail wraps slowly against my waist in an embrace that I don't mind. Lastly, the teenager rests his head on my shoulder.

To see him so peaceful, I can only smile.

Since he lost a lot of weight, he seems as light as a cloud to me. I don't try to rush nor run; walking normally will not attract attention. In addition, I intend to take the isolated roads out of sight. Although Konohagakure is deep in slumber, night owls prowl the stillness of the night. As Godaime warned me, I make sure to remain as discreet and invisible as a shadow that melts into the blackest of darkness.

Naruto had exhausted all of his chakra reserves as he fiercely pushed away the evil memories that sought to plunge his body into pain and fear. Naruto didn't know why the damn mechanism keeping him in the cage had given way and he didn't care. Using all the meagre strength he possessed, he fought savagely to get out and run away. He didn't know where to go, but he wanted to find Kakashi. Because Kakashi had become his world; a world where there was no pain or fear. With time and the rise of nightmares that he persisted in forgetting, this too small and suffocating prison had made him lose all reason. When Kakashi shouted his name, that veil of madness dispersed. Once in his arms, Naruto experienced neither pain nor fear. Because Kakashi hunted away anything that tried to harm him. For fear that Kakashi would leave him again, Naruto clung tightly to his gentle hand. At his touch, Naruto was no longer afraid of those humans who always wished and sought to lock him in a room of doom.

He was convinced that Kakashi would never let them ever again.

He was certain that Kakashi had finally come to take him away from this place of terror.

The light assaulted his bluish irises, blinding him relentlessly. His eyes condemned to darkness could not let this light enter his much too fine pupils. But Naruto didn't need to see since Kakashi was his eyes. His too fragile legs could no longer support him, and the tranquility of sleep wanted to win him over. But Naruto didn't need to walk since Kakashi was his legs. Thus carried by Kakashi, whom he blindly trusted, the young teenager was finally able to discover what was hidden beyond the white, stone and much too narrow walls.

In the peaceful night, he observed the black sky carpeted with stars and lit by its lunar star. He felt on his sensitive skin the gentle pain of a summer wind which wrung shivers of discomfort from him; being against Kakashi's body, the cold didn't get inked despite the incessant shaking. His nose inhaled hundreds of different smells; floral fragrances, sweet foods that pique his curiosity and especially those of so many unique chakras of varied natures. Despite this olfactory overload, nothing chased Kakashi's unmistakable special scent. Also, nothing could ever make it disappear as long as Kakashi was by his side; even if the world was devoured by flames, hurricanes, storms… His smell would linger.

This discovery of the outside world that he had almost forgotten during those painful days of isolation removed the fatigue that was numbing his body. All these new things that he contemplated with curiosity put all his senses on the alert. His restless eyes scanned the surroundings, every corner. He didn't like these urban landscapes, but with Kakashi, he didn't care. As long as Kakashi didn't leave him behind and stayed by his side forever, he could well accept being put back in a hell cage.

Because Kakashi had become his world.

Because Kakashi repelled his suffering, fear and hunger.

Because Kakashi had saved him from the claws of those humans.

This realization, these thoughts, these emotions… All this tumult brought a sincere smile to his lips as he let himself be rocked like a leaf carried by the first autumn wind. For the first time, an unpronounceable tranquility pampered him like a mother cradling her child.