Chapter XXV

Unintentional Embarrassment

TW: Food Disorder

I decided to wait until the next day to take Naruto outside for the very first time. Too mentally exhausted, he had contented himself with lying down after his daytime nap while I was finishing my report. I then immersed myself in reading after nourishing him with my chakra. He was still somewhat shaken by his nightmare, but with my offering, he seemed to be much better. Like the first night, the sapphire-eyed boy had returned to his place by the window to watch the sky obscured by dark clouds. Nose in my book, I let sleep win me little by little under the supervision of my student watching over me.

It was only once under the covers that I realized that I hadn't eaten again all day; the hunger is as silent as Naruto. If Lady Tsunade or Sakura were to find out, I would soon receive multiple sermons. I am well aware. After all, it doesn't help my body to fully recover.

I wonder if it's not related to my unnecessary fear of exposing my face under the piercing eyes of the blond who is in question of my fast… That or the anxiety that this whole story generates.

I cannot tell.

The next morning, surprised, but not surprised, I woke up once again in Naruto's embrace. He annoys me, but I have no choice but to tolerate these awkward mornings that will sadly happen again. After all, besides my bed, the teenager has no place to sleep. However, I was sure I would wake up long before he went to bed. Not only do I sink deeply, I open my eyes much later when I am used to being up at dawn, if not earlier… My body is exhausted, much more than I thought; it's the only logic that I can find to explain this, but I doubt it. Even greatly weakened, I am alert, always on the lookout for danger. I have a bad feeling; I feel as if I wouldn't be able to wake up if I was attacked…

I can't be sure until I give myself a chance to get better.

After a shower to remove the static electricity, Shikamaru came to give me the medication and I took the opportunity to give him my report. By this very fact, I told him that I would visit him in the afternoon with Naruto. Despite my absent appetite, I forced myself to eat breakfast, fighting the urge in my stomach to spit it all out. This time, I rushed to eat as I usually do, especially when there are potential lustful and curious eyes around. Of course, rushing myself like this didn't help my organ to accept the food into it. Foresighted, I also prepared a beverage to offer to the feral boy, more specifically a green tea. Unlike yesterday, he seems to like this one.

His good morning mood sketches a sincere smile on my face.

I take the risk of taking him out in the afternoon. As a result, I want to check his tolerance to light and sun; if there is a way to reaccustom him to a daytime life and for him to tolerate more the gleam which attacks his sensitive retinas. During this walk, I will take him to his house to pack some clothes before going to Shikamaru. However, this troublesome tail is problematic; it attracts way too much attention. The other things like his reptile pupils, claws or fangs are not conspicuous and the black markings can easily be camouflaged. But regarding that extra limb… I have to find a way to settle the matter.

"Come with me, Naruto. I'm taking you out today."

The blond tilts his head to the left with question marks in his eyes. For my part, knowing him, I know that he will soon join me in the room. So I don't wait for him nor look behind me. For the first time in a long time, I put on my accomplished ninja jacket, my back pouch, and my right thigh holster for my shinobi weapons before tying my forehead protector, camouflaging my scarred red eye.

As for Naruto, he stares at me in silence and curiosity. Seeing me put on my headband, he imitates me and ties his own on his forehead, smiling. At least he's not entirely trying to copy me since he doesn't cover his left eye as I do. This observation reassures me; I was afraid he wanted to look like me.

It's my turn to intently stare at Naruto. Putting a hand to my chin, I think about how I could hide his tail. Luckily, aside from a few useless twirls, the teen obediently waits with disturbing neutrality as he plunges his irises into mine.

"What to do, what to do?" I whisper to myself.

An idea finally comes to my mind after a few seconds. I approach Naruto to grab his tail to wrap it tightly around his waist, against his tanned skin… Suddenly, I hear the frantic heartbeat of my student that stops me in my gesture. He clenches his fists, making me raise an eyebrow. When I raise my dark eye, I see the blond completely frozen to his breath. His ebony fur has ruffled to its climax and his hair are too. His light locks hide his eyes. His face is scarlet red. Stunned, I freeze, looking for the cause of his atypical reaction by batting my eyelid. Mechanically, I release his limb from my palm, which slowly unrolls itself.

Naruto stays like that for a breath before going to my bed and completely covering himself with the blanket without making a sound. Could it be … relatively sensitive for him..? Did I really do something inappropriate? Or is it something else? Although I wish I was wrong, seeing his obvious embarrassment, my brain can only conclude that. I also blushed, embarrassed too.

"Na-Naruto… My intention wasn't what you think," I explain awkwardly as I approach the bed.

I cautiously grab the blanket and partially remove it. His back to me, still flushed, he fiercely avoids my gaze as if his life depended on it.

"I am sorry. I didn't want to do anything inappropriate… I'm just looking for a way to hide it…"

With a quick movement, the sapphire-eyed boy grabs the blanket to hide again—something I forbid him by pulling my side.

"I'm taking you out today whether you like it or not! So, get out of there!" I curse as the blanket slip from his hands. "What more do you want me to tell you?! I am really sorry!"

The blond—thus uncovered—puts his palms on his face before curling up into a ball; even his black tail wraps around his own body. Unwilling to wait or make a visibly useless apology, I grab his ankles and force him out of bed. Naruto clings fiercely to the sheets with his sharp claws to resist me, pushing me to fight even harder. The embarrassment that encompassed me gives way to anger.

"NARUTO! STOP ACTING AS A CHILD AND GET OUT OF BED!" I yell as Naruto let out a high-pitched noise before letting go.

It took long minutes, but Naruto finally calmed down, me included. His cheekbones are still overheated, his eyes are avoiding me like the plague, but he stopped wanting to curl up and disappear. Luckily, he didn't lash out at me when he had every reason to do so; I assume he must tolerate my rotten behaviours of impatience due to his emotional dependence of me.

"Maybe that's normal for you, but in other people's eyes that tail isn't," I calmly repeat to him, running a hand through my silver hair. "You understand me?"

The teenager finally deigns to look back at me despite his pout, but I feel that he has understood me since he sighs for a long time.

"I'll wrap it around your waist and you'll keep it that way. Know that I have absolutely no unhealthy idea in mind and that my gestures are chaste, okay?"

He turns his head, frowns, and crosses his arms, wagging his tail. He does not agree at all and visibly not happy, that is understood. I reach out my hand to him anyway.

"Come on. Give it to me," I sigh. "The sooner you do it, the sooner I'll stop bothering you with this."

Naruto glares at me. He lets out muffled grunts like a sulking child. Nevertheless, he decides to reluctantly offer it to me; his face flushes quickly. Carefully, I grab it and hurry, so I don't make him any more uncomfortable than he already is. I don't have to look at him to know how uncomfortable he is. I manage to roll it up several turns, but I don't have time to finish that he starts to wobble. He struggles to stand and it doesn't take long before he loses his balance and clings to me to hold himself… With my posture slightly unsteady, not expecting to be grabbed so suddenly, Naruto drags me along in his fall.

Unfortunately, it's only once on the ground that I notice that he's on his back and that I am on top of him on all fours; this awkward posture makes my organ run in panic. His eyes stare intensely into mine, forcing me to hold my breath.

I get up, jumping away from him. I turn my back to him before putting a hand to my heart. I take a long breath in the hope of calming down; at that, an unpleasant warmth in my face lingers for a few moments. I don't know why I'm overreacting so much. This forced closeness with my student generates an emotional confusion that I cannot put into words. I'm too used to being alone; I'm very reserved and haven't let anyone get close to me since Obito and Rin—rather, ever since then, I've been fiercely reluctant to get closer. For my misfortune, I am obliged to allow the amnesic and vulnerable teenager to override the barriers that I impose on others…

I don't have a choice.

I cannot choose.

I know it only too well.

Slowly, my body and my mind regain their calm. I return my attention to Naruto. In the meantime, he sat down and unrolled his black tail. Obviously, it's essential for his sense of balance; without it, the blond cannot stand or walk. I embarrassed each other for nothing, and my plan fell through. I have to think of another way to hide it… In broad daylight, I can't take him out like that and carry him on my back attracts just as much attention.

I'm back to the beginning…

Luckily, an idea lights my lantern.

I head to my closet to get my hands on it. Since everything is neatly stored, I soon find my long white cape with red stripes at the bottom of it, which I use when travelling in wintry regions or when the weather is rainy. Being taller than him it should fall to his ankles… Although that will do for now, I'm afraid my pupil will get too hot… If he was still a whistling kettle, I wouldn't have cared much.

"Naruto, come," I say, showing the cloak.

Naruto obeys although he frowns. I dress him in my immaculate white cape, making sure to hide his tail. As I had suspected, it falls to the bottom of his ankles. At least it will also camouflage the oversized clothes I lent him.

"I sincerely hope you're okay with that," I sigh.

The sapphire-eyed boy examines the fabric of touch before inhaling its scent. It's only now that I notice that he has a tendency to analyze things with his sense of smell. His devourer condition must have amplified this rather non-existent sense in him; I wouldn't be surprised if he had a nose as delicate as mine. After his scent inspection, Naruto offers me a sincere smile. I take this that he's fine with it.

"Listen to me very carefully, Naruto. We're gonna go out together and you're gonna keep that tail tucked under that coat. No one must see it, no one, am I clear?"

True to his silence, he doesn't answer … but my words do not generate any reaction in him, not the least. He just remains impassive as he stares at me. I sigh.

"You have to answer me one way or another, Naruto. I can't guess what's going on in your little head. If you understood me, can you give a thumbs up like that?" I ask him, obviously raising my thumb to put my words in picture.

I hope deep down that he will be able to answer in such a primal way. I must say that having to guess the least of his thoughts exhausts me horribly and drives out the patience in me… This patience that I manage to find despite everything.

After a seemingly endless time staring at my hand, Naruto gives me a thumbs up … but not for the reasons I wanted. Judging by his pout, he has no idea why, not to mention that his black tail is twirling uselessly. Annoyed, I sigh deeply, running a hand through my silver hair.

His silence is so severe that the slightest communication, however small, is impossible for him…