This is my choice
Volume 1. Chapter 1. Prologue
After death, everyone usually dreams of going to heaven or some other place, except hell. And me? I just wanted a break from my life but found myself in a place I didn't wish to end up after death. What did I see? A vast room or space that resembled more of a dark void than anything else. My field of vision was limited to just ten meters in front of me, and that's all I could see. However, I managed to notice that I was devoid of all the emotions and feelings I experienced when alive. And it wasn't as bad as it seemed. The real challenge was my ignorance of where to go. But I didn't want to wait passively, so I ventured forward or backward — in this strange place, it was hard to determine which plane I was moving in, whether up or down, forward or backward. But the movement somehow continued. I wandered for about half an hour, maybe more, until someone's voice pronounced my name.
"Evan."
"What?! Who are you? I turned at the sound of the voice but saw nothing."
"My name is Dotai."
"Why are you here? And why can't I see you?"
"I came for you, or take it as you will. You can't see me because I don't want you to."
"Alright, and why do you want to take me?"
"For a new rebirth."
"What? And why do you care?"
"Do you not want it?" A head with eyes emerged from the emptiness after these words.
"I'm just glad I don't feel anything right now otherwise, I would hit you for this trick" I said, not amused.
"This is not a trick. And I'll ask you again, why don't you want to be reborn?" — the head asked.
"Because I've already lived my life, and I don't want to go back" I firmly replied.
"Alright, then you don't have to worry about it." The head disappeared after these words.
"Why shouldn't I worry about it?"
"Because you will be reborn without memories of your past life."
"But then what's the point of being reborn if I don't remember it?"
"There's no point. You have to continue your cycles, and that's it. And I have to restore it to you."
"What if I don't want to?" The strange head reappeared from the darkness after these words.
"Do you really believe you have a choice?" The mysterious figure asked in a menacingly low voice, and then his head twisted into a grin, revealing two rows of razor-sharp teeth, like shark's teeth.
"Are you trying to scare me?" If I had eyebrows right now, I would have raised one.
"You're a strange person." The face stopped smiling. "If you want, I can give you a chance to choose your own fate."
"My fate, ha-ha, as if it exists, this fate." My gaze focused on his eyes.
"If you don't believe, check it yourself." The strange figure from nowhere reached out a hand and waved it, causing something like a funnel to appear, emitting a creepy sound resembling the crunch of broken bones.
"And what is this?" I asked, turning back to where the funnel appeared.
"This is a portal connected to the worlds where I can send you." His gaze shifted from the portal to me.
"Why did you open it?" I asked the stranger again.
"To give you a choice." The stranger smiled.
"What other choice did you want to give?" I asked suspiciously.
"The choice to be reborn without memories or to perish in the vortex and hope your soul survives."
"What does it mean to survive? Can a soul die?"
"No, the soul cannot die, but it can disintegrate."
"What does it mean to disintegrate?"
"The vortex is like a meat grinder that tears the soul that falls into it into pieces."
"And then, what do you see as a choice here?"
"In the fact that there is a percentage that the vortex may not divide you too much, and your individual parts will continue to exist. Then it will prove that you have a destiny."
"Somehow it doesn't sound very convincing."
"But that's all I can give you. Take it or leave it. I'm not forcing you."
"Oh! So, I just need to jump?"
"Yes."
"Alright." Not in a hurry, I began to approach the vortex. When I reached it, I stopped and thought.
("Do I really want to jump into the vortex where survival is almost impossible? In my life, I've done many foolish things, but this step seems much more senseless than jumping from the tenth floor to survive. And it seems that this mysterious creature is hiding something from me. So maybe it's better to leave it for later and try to convince it to do something else or find out the truth." I stepped away from the vortex, lost in thought.)
"What changed your mind?"
"Not yet, but I don't trust you, so tell me why were you so sure that I would refuse?"
"Ah, so you noticed that I told you a little lie?"
"Yes, I suspected you from the moment you said you were giving me a choice that I didn't have from the beginning, so Dotai?"
"I didn't know that you knew the meaning of my name, Evan."
"Tell me, what happens if I bend into it?"
"You will one hundred percent die because a torn soul cannot live without its parts, then it will start disappearing into the energy of the world it entered. If your soul is lucky and there are people nearby who can be your donors, it will help heal your soul, but your donor will swallow you, like other strange people to you." A strange creature's face twisted into an ugly smile.
"I thought you were hiding valuable information from me."
"So, are you ready to be reborn as planned from the beginning?"
"Yes."
"What?" The grimace disappeared.
"It's strange to hear this from you, Dotai."
"I hoped to have some fun with you, but you spoiled everything with one word." His face became sad.
"I sympathize with you." With a touch of irony, I spoke these words.
"Heh. Interesting, you're the first person who behaves like this"
"Why am I the first?" I asked with interest.
"Usually, when people appear here, for some reason, they think I'm their guide to a new fantastic life where they will have superpowers and their own harem, which will become bigger and bigger with each arrival. You're the first person who didn't think about a harem or something else in another world."
"Understood. Can you read minds?"
"Yes. Does it bother you?"
"No."
"Another strange thing about you."
"It's not strange to me; it doesn't matter."
"Alright, got it. But that's not your main peculiarity."
"So, what is my peculiarity then?"
"It's that I can't read your thoughts."
"What?" A suspicious look.
"I'm not joking. Somehow, I can't see your thoughts."
"Understood."
"Then let me finish my work" As the head started moving from the darkness, the body began to take shape.
"Something new. You finally decided to show yourself fully."
"I need a complete body to erase your memory. It will take some time."
"I see."
"In a while."
"Alright, I'm done. Then come over to me..." Something humanoid felt embarrassed.
The dark humanoid figure stood alone in the emptiness, and only the swirling vortex crackled in the void.