It's not right. None of it is right.

How can it not be right. It's her body. Her memories. But they don't match. How can they not match. Sitting on the floor in front of a mirror Alice can see her body clear or any marks, scratches, bruises or scars. Yet there should be some there. She knows there should be some. She remembers them happening. So why aren't they there.

Umbrella.

They fucked with her again. Played around with her body. Her corpse. They took her and turned her into their experiment again. What have they done to her. How have they managed to strip her of her humanity even more. She feels weird. Distant. Like she's not in control of her own body but merely a passenger in it.

But if she's not in control then who is. What is she. Is she even her anymore. How much of Alice Abernathy is left. Is she just a walking husk. A puppet on Umbrellas strings waiting for it's master to begin to move her. A modern day Frankenstein's monster. Last time it took a nuke and a helicopter crash to kill her. She wonders what it will take this time.

Her hand goes over the spot on her chest where that tool got lodged in her. Where she could feel the blood pouring out of her as she choked on it. She remembers that. Remembers the pain and how it burned. How she was terrified that everyone was about to die as the Helicopter spun out of control from the shockwave.

She remembers that happening. So why isn't there a mark on her to prove this.

"Are you alright." A weary voice asks from the other side of the room. Alice doesn't turn around but meets Jill's nervous gaze in the mirror. She supposes she is a strange sight. Sitting in nothing but her bra and underwear staring into the mirror like it's the void.

A part of her wants to say yes, get up dressed and away from Jill's awkward gaze and posture as she watches the basically naked Alice. She really should do that. She shouldn't make Jill uncomfortable. But she can feel Jill's gaze roaming her skin. She remembers Jill checking her out in Raccoon City. Remembers Jill comparing her to a supermodel. It's flattering. Then and now.

But she has more important things to deal with other then the romantic feeling lying between them. Like the fact, she should have scars but doesn't. "No." Is all she says to Jill before tearing her eyes away from the raven haired woman and back onto herself.

It's unnerving to see her perfectly clear skin reflecting back at her. Skin that should be littered with cuts and bruises from escaping Umbrella and an assortment of scars. What's the point of getting her memory back only for it to conflict with her pristine looking body. Her mind is jumbled, and this makes her wonder if she can even trust her memoires. She isn't sure she can even tell the difference between real and fake anymore. Everything that happened in the Hive and Raccoon City feels like a bad dream. If it wasn't for the fact Jill, Carlos, LJ and Angie are here with her she would really question her own sanity. Maybe she finally had that breakdown Spencer used to joke about her having once.

"Your being weird." Jill bluntly states now standing behind her.

A choked laugh that sounds more like a dying animal doesn't help in assuring Jill that she isn't being weird. She rapidly shakes her head side to side closing her eyes before desperately opening them hoping to see that the mirror image has changed. That now she can see the scars that once graced her skin.

Her body has always represented her life. Every scar gave her purpose. A reminder of what she had to overcome. What she endured. A constant reminder that she made it through some of the worst types of hell. Opening her eyes she is once again met with flawless skin, and she almost wants to scream.

All gone. It's all gone. Her body is a blank canvas and her mind is having trouble making the connection to her. It was if her mind kept sending her error signals because it knows something should be there and there isn't. It's like a computer bluescreening because something isn't working the way it should and it can't keep up with that's happening anymore.

Her body keeps screaming at her mind that it's her, but her brain can't accept the truth when the memories are wrong. That it's not right. That she's not right. It's confusing and draining but she can't look away. Can't do anything else until she can figure out if the person she resides in is actually her.

"Now you're starting to scare me." Jill mutter slowly kneeling down next to her.

"It's wrong." Alice admits quietly. "It's all wrong."

Not understanding what is going through her mind Jill asks, "What's wrong."

"Me." Her body was trained as a warrior, a fighter. But her body is that of a young girl that she once was before she begun training. Hell, the scar she got from falling off her bike is gone. "It's not right. None of its right."

"Alice." Jills gently puts her hand under her chin and turns her face forcing her to look at Jill. "What's not right."

"My body." Staring into Jill's light grey eyes is distracting. Helps her focus on something other than the wrongness of herself. "My scars are gone. Everything that made me... me is gone. Umbrella took that away from me. My life, my body, my mind. I... my mind is conflicting against itself. It doesn't know who I am anymore and can't connect to the person here. I... think I've gone crazy."

She tries to look back at the mirror. The false belief that if she looks again everything with have changed. But Jill doesn't let her turn away. Instead, her hold on her face tightens while her other hand comes up to trace across the one scar that remained. The one element of who she used to be. "This one stayed."

Yes, but why. Why out of all of her scars was this the one to remain. Goosebumps lay in wake of Jill's soft touch on her skin as the dark haired woman strokes the pale scar. "I was mugged back in Washington. Some idiot with a switchblade thought I would be easy prey. I managed to subdue him, but he was faster than I expected."

After everything they have been through together it's easy to forget that they have only really know each other less than twenty four hours. And most of that time was spent trying to stay alive not getting to know each other's histories. So, she isn't surprised when Jill's interest in her past arises. "You lived in Washington."

That whole thing feels like a lifetime ago... Oh wait... it was... because she died... she's trying really hard not to gloss over that aspect of her life but it's on the backburner for now. "Yeah, when I worked for the Treasury Department."

"What was it like there." Jill asks sounding interested but Alice knows what she's doing. She's drawing her mind away from the lack of scars and onto something else. Trying to calm her down.

And it's working a little. "A boys club. They didn't take me seriously and would constantly joke about who I was sleeping with to make it this far. Same reason I was rejected from the Secret Service." The bitterness of that rejection still lingers. She felt ashamed and angry when she was told no by some slimy looking git. Never mind the fact she was at the top of all tests. Just because she didn't have a dick, she wasn't capable to do her job.

Umbrella used that to swoop in and offer her a job that pays better, has better hours and benefits all the while letting her do her job. It's why a lot of women left their jobs when Umbrella offered. She knows it was the same for Rain. The LAPD SWAT Captain straight up told her that as long as he is alive and in charge a woman would never make SWAT.

One found her the next day and offered her the job. Now both of them are dead. And she's a freak. While the men who caused them to leave are happily living their lives. Funny how that works out.

"Yeah, I know the feeling." Jill agrees taking her by surprise. "It was like that on the STAR's as well. just because I was an attractive woman meant I couldn't be as good as them. Peyton was the only one who believed in me." She didn't expect that. She met other members of STARs. Outside of Raccoon City and they were female.

Hell, one tried to recruit her to join them before she took the offer from Umbrella.

"Our looks don't define us." Even at the start of her time at Umbrella she was judged because of how she looked. That quickly went away when she put the instructor in the hospital after their first spar. People learned to respect her then. "Yet I'm more surprised it was just Peyton who could accept that a beautiful woman could be on par with them. I thought STARS were more inclusive than that."

Jill's eyes widen and a timid smile flashes across her lips. "You think I'm beautiful."

"That's probably the only thing I am sure about right now." Alice honestly replies. So much doesn't make sense to her anymore, but Jill does. Kind of.

Jill seems unsure how to take that which gives Alice the chance to turn back to the mirror. Maybe if her mind can't connect with her current body, she has to change it. Maybe if she was to replicate the scars it would help her brain process that this is her body. Maybe the pain of the blade slicing through her skill will shock her body and brain into working together.

Or would it make things worse. Twice the memorise for one set of identical scars. Would that screw up her mind more. Ever since waking up in that facility naked... for a second time. Her memories the ones she couldn't remember in Raccoon City have come flooded back more vividly. Like when she remembers something that happened, she relives it. If she tried to recreate the scars, would she relive each instance that brought them in in the first place. Each a staple of debilitating pain. Some that left her hospitalised and unable to move properly for weeks.

The crippling pain she had expected to feel while trying to escape Raccoon City was dull. The virus seemed to have diluted her ability to feel pain. It was more of a mental feeling of hurt for each injury rather than physical. At the time she thought it was weird and another thing to question umbrella upon, but she was a little too busy trying to keep everyone alive and escape a nuke to really pay much mind to it.

Would she always remember the pain as she cut into herself and relive that. Would it even matter. If she harms herself would the cuts heal themselves again leaving no trace of their existence.

"What are you thinking." Jill asks drawing Alice's focus back onto her.

"How long do you think it would take for me to heal if I slit my wrist." It's a morbid question but Jill did ask what she is thinking. Not that she would do that. But she is curious to how fast she heals not. Back in Raccoon City it was a matter of minutes. Ten at the most before cuts would fade.

Would it be faster now. With whatever did to her to make her feel even more different. Maybe she should figure that out. If she ever needs to take a bullet for someone or something like that knowing how long, she will be out of the fight is important.

"Don't you dare even think about doing that." Jill panicky gasps at her. Right forgot about her for a moment there. "Jesus fuck Alice."

She may have slightly lost her mind but the functional part of it is still able to figure out what her words might be interpreted as. "Forget I said anything."

"Like hell I will." So, she's not forgetting it. Great. "Alice."

"I have no idea what this body is capable of. What its limits are."

"Your limits." Jill pushes. "Your body."

"It doesn't feel like my body." It doesn't look like her body. Is it weird she more hung up on that rather than the fact she was dead. Like dead dead for a number of days.

Jill analysing her like she's looking for something. It's slightly unnerving how it feels like Jill is seeing right through her. Vulnerability has never been her strong suit yet with Jill, she doesn't mind it. Whatever Jill was looking for in her she seems to find. "It really bothers you doesn't it."

"The fact I've been here for an hour... maybe two should have been the giveaway." She doesn't actually know how long she's been trapped in this position. All she knows was that it was light outside when she first sat down and now it's pitch black.

Jill takes a hold of her hand and places it on top of her own. "Your scars aren't there physically anymore but there are there emotionally. So, show me."

She confused. More than she was a minute ago. Which is hard to believe in it's own right. "What."

Jill sighs but explains softly like she's some kind of nervous animal. Which to be fair isn't that far away from being true. "You remember your scars. So, show me where they were. Maybe it will help you mind acclimate to its new normal."

"This doesn't freak you out." Alice asks. It's freaking her out and she's living it. How can Jill seem so calm about all of this.

"No. It's you." And wow that was the nicest thing someone has ever said to her. She kind of wants to kiss her for that. Well, she wanted to do that before but the urge is back stronger. But she restrains herself. That aspect of their relationship can be figured out once her head isn't a mess.

Following Jill's advice, she guides her hand to her right arm just above her elbow. "I was shoot three years ago. I was on the protective detail of a high-level Umbrella scientist who had caused a stir in the world of medicine. His work disproved a lot of other research taking place and a lot of people lost their jobs. Someone took what he did personally."

"And they shot you." Badly grazed would be a better definition of what happened that day.

"They were aiming for him but is intervened." Shoving the poor man to the ground in other words and accidentally catching the bullet as she went down with him.

"Did they catch him."

"Yeah. Milwaukee PD caught the man while I was sent to the hospital. Which I hated." She also hated being in Milwaukee, but she had her orders and was assigned to him as one of her first jobs. Umbrella saw her as a hero for it and promoted her. She was just glad to leave Milwaukee.

Alice guides her hand to her left ankle. She got this scar on holiday. It was a stupid a scar but it always made her laugh and smile. She was snorkelling in the Caribbean and accidently slipped on some slippy rock and her ankle unfortunately caught the edge of a sharp point. There was a lot of blood, and it was very dramatic at the time for her and her parents. But to be fair she was only eight.

The next scar come from a motorcycle accident. Screwed up her left leg and arm when she was nineteen. Her leg got the worst of it. "Is destroying bikes a regular occurrence with you."

"I've only done it twice. Swear." She couldn't afford to keep destroying them. Those things aren't cheap. Beside that would be a waste of a perfectly good bike and her skills.

"Uh huh," Jill says not believing her one bit. "What else."

She turns her hand over showing her palm. "Got into a knife fight once and stupidly decided the best way to disarm my opponent was to grab the blade and rip it out of their grasp. It worked but my palm suffered."

Jill rolls her eyes with mirth reflecting in them. "I'm pretty sure that's the first thing they teach you about knife fights. Don't grab the sharp end."

Now she wants to roll her eyes. Instead, she asks, "You been in many knife fights Valentine." She's seen first hand how deadly Jill is with a gun as well as her combat skills. Before the virus turned her into this freak, they probably would have been level in hand to hand.

"More bar brawls then knife fights." Jill smirks at her and Alice can't help but smile back. Why is that not surprising to her. "Next one."

Alice continues listing of injuries she gained in her service to Umbrella. Each with their own story and Jill listens with fascination to everything she has done. the insane and crazy to the downright suicidal.

She turns slightly exposing more of her back to Jill before tugging her hand and having her stroke down from her shoulder down to her hip. "When I was doing Firewatch duty the rope I was using to abyssal snapped. Sliced up my back, broke my arm and left me with a bad concussion. It fricking hurt."

Jill is looking at her in amusement and she can't figure out why. "I'm sorry I know that was important. But Firewatch."

"Yeah. You know the people who stay in the towers in the forest to keep an eye out for forest fires. I did it over summer break." She can see Jill holding in her laugh. "Hey, I got to spend the summer getting paid, not having to deal with people and out in nature. It was great... Apart from the almost dying part."

"Not a fan of people." Jill asks with a raised eyebrow.

She shrugs. "I'm not the most social person." Never really has been.

"Yeah, I got that impression from Raccoon City." Jill jokes and Alice feels a slight blush appear on her on face. That wasn't her finest demonstration of social skills. Her flirting might have been on point with Jill and she's shockingly good with kids. Other people. Not so much. There's a reason everyone at Umbrella called her an uptight bitch behind her back. Mainly Rain and JD. Others mostly joked about her sex life. Lisa was the only person she considered a friend.

Well, her and Spencer. And look how that turned out.

Speaking of Raccoon. She places Jill's hand on the centre of her chest. She can feel the way her heart picks up. Knows that Jill can feel it to. It's nice to feel her heart race. Nice to know it still can. Right where that pipe impaled itself in her and she died. There is no mark of it. No evidence it happens other then the memory both of them share. "Death."

Her drops her hands from holding Jill's hostage on her chest. Yet even when Alice is no longer holding her there anymore Jill's hand still lingers in place her eye focused on her chest. The silence between them is almost stifling until Jill finally looks up to meet her gaze. "You actually died."

"What do you think happened." Alice asks slightly confused. "You's left my dead body behind. You know I died."

"No. I... we thought you died then Angie said she could still feel her connection to you. We... We just assumed you were still alive when we left you." There's guilt in her voice. Understandable when you think you've left someone you care about to die and be captured by Umbrella. "We... I never would have left you there if we thought you were alive."

"Well good thing I was dead then. Wouldn't want you to feel guilty over that." She says trying to be reassuring but the downfallen look that appears on Jill's face say she did not say that correctly. "You broke into an Umbrella facility to rescue me. I don't know anyone else who would risk that for me." Is it sad to admit that or just show how strong the bond between their little group is even after a few hours together. Trauma bonding at its finest.

"You would do the same for me... for us I mean." Jill catches herself looking away from Alice and focusing more on the navy carpet they are sitting on.

She would have done the same for other members of the group. But for Jill and Angie she would have gone further. "Yeah. I would." Something in her tone is different. Almost a breathless affection shines through rather than the calm comforting tone she was going for. Jill's eyes snap back to her and reads the hidden message tinting them.

Both of them seem to come aware of the that fact Jill's hand is still pressed against her chest at the same moment. She feels her heart speed up more. The whole tension of the room shifting to something more suffocating. But not in a bad way. More like they are being cocooned in something. The same something that has been hanging over them since they first met and grew during their time together.

She lifted her head up, staring into her light grey eyes that were suddenly almost hypnotising. Alice's eyes fluttered from Jill's eyes to her lips and quickly back to her eyes again, and she leaned in and kissed Jill before she lost her courage. The kiss was soft and quick because the second she realized what she was doing, she pulled away. Fear of crossing the line or misreading this tension between has Alice reeling away terrified to face Jill's rejection.

Already her head is trying to make up excuses she could use in order to salvage their friendship. Her weird body trauma seems the best way to go. She's messed up as it and Jill has seen that first hand. She could just expand on that.

"It's okay," Jill interrupts her spiral into panic as she ran her thumb across Alice's bottom lip, shocked at the action super powered woman just took. Is that an it's ok in we don't have to talk about it. Or the it's ok I feel the same. The silence comes back between them as Jill continues to run her thumb across her lips. Her other hand comes up to cup her face. "Alice," Jill starts. "It's okay."

Jill then leaned down, bringing her lips back to Alice's, making the kiss last longer than the first one. Jill's hand found its way to her hair as she took in a fistful of it and brought her face even closer to Alice's. Her tongue found its way in between her teeth, and she granted Jill access as she opened her mouth. When they pulled away for air, Jill rested his forehead against Alice's. "I feel the same Alice." Jill says assuring her. The kiss was reassuring enough but it's still nice to hear.

Whatever they were doing, whatever they are now, she wanted to keep doing it. Everything else feels muddled. Out of place or wrong. Everything but Jill that is. Now here with Jill, kissing her back and holding her tight, and everything made sense.