April 5th, 2003
Even if she wanted to she wouldn't be able to wipe off the smile from her face. Rachel is certainly having the best day of her life. Hermione is talking to Molly while the little girl giggles and yells inside a magical inflatable toy. Draco is inside with the kids, making a fool of himself and being the fun uncle. Hermione knows how Ginny appreciates his efforts in fitting with her family and she can't help admiring their relationship. Even with everything against them they found a way of making it work… different from-
Harry stops by her side, gently nudging her and extending a plate of finger food to her. She discreetly shakes her head not knowing how in the world he knew she was hungry. The gesture warms her insides.
"Thank you." She says as she takes it from his hand. Her favorites. Hermione sighs.
"You're welcome." He winks at her and she averts her eyes from him. She always thought him handsome, but today he outdid himself and she's not sure how he did it at a children's party. And he's only in a nice long sleeved blue shirt tucked inside a black trouser. I mean, come on. But there's something about his eyes. She's not sure what. "We'll have to step up our game to top this party next year." He chuckles and her stomach flips at the prospect of how their lives will be in a year. "Look at her." He says.
Rachel's hair is a mess, some sticking on her forehead as she's sweating from how much she's enjoying herself, her face red. Hermione snorts a chuckle. "She'll need a bath before settling down for camping." Harry agrees.
They stay close for a while, he's sipping on a drink and she keeps eating. No one approaches them and Hermione notices that Molly is not there anymore. She frowns. It's been a while since she spent some real alone time with Harry. She can't help being nervous in a way. He steps closer to her and she feels the warmth from his body. Harry clears his throat and she glances at him, raising an eyebrow.
"What?" She asks.
"Nothing." He says. Then he smiles mischievously. "There's some-" He doesn't finish his sentence because his thumb comes close to her mouth, pressing against it and swiping something away. Her heart stops, she's sure. "mayo." He lifts his thumb and shows her the sauce, then he… he licks it. Hermione actually holds back a groan, her knees buckling slightly. "Hm, it's amazing." He says as his eyes never leave hers. She opens her mouth, baffled. What the-
He's about to say something else but a male voice startles them. Hermione turns her head. It's Noah. She immediately feels the air changing around them because of Harry's posture. He stiffens by her side and there's a scowl on his face as he watches Noah approaching them. She settles the plate down on a table by her other side and cleans her mouth with a napkin. She hugs Noah tightly when he greets her. He's been an amazing friend lately.
"You look beautiful." Noah says as his eyes roam over her. She blushes a little. It's been a while since someone complimented her. "Potter."
Harry snorts by her side. "You know what, Noah? I never got your last name. I mean, you like calling me Potter, so…" Harry shrugs and Hermione has no idea what the bloody hell is happening.
"It's Villin."
Hermione widens her eyes when Harry laughs out loud. "Okay, Villin. Is that Rachel's present?" Harry points to the package Noah is holding. "Let me put it with the others." Without another word he takes the present and leaves them alone. Hermione turns her attention to Noah.
"What the hell was that?" She asks.
Noah shrugs. "No idea. He just likes being a git, I guess."
It's stronger than her. "Don't talk about him like that." She says sharply. Then the pain in Noah's eyes make her regret her words. "I mean…" She tries thinking of something to mend it. Harry was indeed a git. "There must be an explanation for it." She waves her hand, dismissing the subject. "Doesn't matter. How are you?" She smiles at him and Noah seems to forget what just happened as he talks about the crazy morning he had.
While she talks to him, Hermione can feel Harry's eyes on them, even if she doesn't turn her head to look. She has no idea why he acted so bluntly jealous. He doesn't love her. He's not in love with her, so, what the freaking- She nods at Noah's words, barely listening and discreetly glancing at the spot she knows Harry is talking to Ginny and Arthur.
His eyes are set on her. She holds his gaze and tries understanding what exactly they're sharing in that moment but it's hard to tell. It seems like he's saying something to her. She tilts her head. He opens a bright smile and his hovering camera takes a picture near by. She blinks, the moment gone.
Draco finally comes to them and Rachel follows behind, trying to catch her uncle. He keeps feinting her and she's getting angrier and angrier at each failed attempt. Then he finally lets her catch him and they fall on the grass, laughing. Hermione didn't even notice but Ginny is there now, by her side, greeting Noah.
Ginny sighs. "I never thought I would want to have mini Malfoys coming out of me." Hermione blurts out a laugh. Ginny has her eyes on Draco tickling Rachel. "I mean," She points at them, "am I wrong?" Hermione shakes her head.
"Not at all. I think he'll be a great father." Her words take her eyes back to Harry. He's smiling and still talking to Arthur. Harry is the perfect example of an amazing father, at least in her opinion. Any children of his would be the luckiest in the world. She clicks her tongue and brushes away the thought.
Draco comes with Rachel and she tells Hermione she wants more ice cream. Taking her hand she distances herself from Ginny, Draco and Noah. "Are you having fun, pumpkin?" Rachel nods.
"Yes!" She says excitedly. "Play with me, mama?" She points at another inflatable toy. It's shaped like a castle and you just jump inside, much like the muggle one but with a magical twist. It alters the gravity inside, so the jumps feel like you're walking on the moon.
"Of course!" Hermione exclaims. "Ice cream first, though!"
He watches as she distances herself with Rachel. Draco and Ginny are talking to Ned. Arthur keeps telling him a story Harry already heard two times, so he nods whenever he thinks it's fitting. He has other worries at the moment as his eyes search for Hermione. She's eating ice cream with Rachel now, both smiling and enjoying the moment. He smiles a goofy smile. Hermione looks indeed beautiful in her white dress. He was going to tell her exactly that when Ned arrived. Harry doesn't care about hiding his jealousy anymore, there's no reason why. But he could tell his attitude surprised Hermione. And that was his intention, really. He needs to make some things clear.
Finishing his drink he watches as they head to the inflatable castle. He raises an eyebrow at that, Hermione probably doesn't imagine what the toy can actually do to agree to it. Excusing himself and patting Arthur's shoulder, he walks to the toy. Before stepping inside he can hear Rachel's laughter. Taking off his shoes and placing them next to Hermione's at the entrance, he jumps. The toy is enormous inside. The ceiling is extremely high as if infinite to give the sensation of flying. He spots Rachel in the air, laughing wildly. Hermione is close, a small smile on her face, her eyes very wide. Of course. She hates flying. He jumps another time, getting closer to them.
"Dada!" Rachel sees him first and then Hermione turns her head to him. She looks like she's about to vomit. He laughs out loud when he reaches her in the air and brings her down.
"Nauseous?" He asks, his hand holding hers, the warmth of their contact exhilarating him.
She grunts. "I should have thought this through." She says. Rachel is going up in the air again as they slowly go down, but, inevitably when their feet touch the bottom, they go way up again and she shrieks. Harry pulls her closer, his arms around her waist.
"Focus on me." He says to her.
She turns fully to him, her hands resting on his shoulders as she bites her lower lip and shakes a little. She dares glancing down. "Don't look down. Look at me." She raises her eyes at his voice. Harry feels his stomach clenching at their proximity, it's like there are a thousand butterflies inside, and they're certainly not from the height. She smells amazingly. He opens a side smile. "Okay, we need to reach the entrance." They're falling down again. "But we have at least three jumps until there." Hermione grunts. They hit the bottom and go way up another time. Harry is steering them gently. "There's no need to be scared, okay?" He says in a low voice. She nods slowly. "I'm here." He feels her nails digging into his shoulders. He dares bringing her even closer, their bodies touching everywhere. "Try to enjoy the moment, Hermione." His voice is hoarse and she seems speechless. "Feel the air around you." He continues in a low voice, close to her ear. Her arms go around his neck while her hair goes up with the fall. He can't even believe they're hugging after so long. They hit the bottom again, now closer to the entrance. "If you open yourself to it you'll be able to see the magic in flying. It's more magical than anything else we do, actually." She turns her head, their faces close. "Have you noticed how quiet it is up here?" He asks, really wanting an answer. She nods. "It's nice, isn't it? I always loved flying because of it. I can think clearly in the air, I can hear my deepest thoughts and understand them better. It clears my mind." They're coming down again, Harry knows it's probably their last jump. He gives it a nice impulse and they go higher than ever. But Hermione doesn't seem to mind. She's observing him, trying to read him like she would do with the most complex book ever written. "And to soar in the air, to feel that exhilarating sensation in your stomach, to give yourself up for the fall… it's amazing." He gulps. Then he dares bumping his nose into hers. They both close their eyes. His heart is beating fast now, hers also.
But they hit the floor too fast. The gravity gone at the entrance. They stay put, noses close, eyes locked, their breathes mingling, arms around each other. Harry doesn't move, but as he expected, Hermione closes her eyes and moves slightly away from him. He doesn't stop her and she releases him. "Thanks, Harry." She says slowly as she wets her lips and clears her throat. He watches her picking up her shoes and avoiding his eyes. They still can hear Rachel's laughs from inside. "Tell Rach I'll go with her on another toy later." He nods and she moves away. He can tell she's shaken, but now he's not sure if the reason is the flying or their proximity.
He goes back inside to seize Rachel. She ate way too much to be flying like that.
Only later, when he's putting on his shoes and Rachel is already darting away to play on another toy, he sees Draco coming to him. Ginny and Hermione are talking in a corner, drinking. Ned is grabbing some food, Molly talking to him.
"So?" Harry asks Draco the moment they steer far from the rest of the party, heading inside the house. Draco closes the door behind him.
"You owe me one, Harry. Ginny was there as if she knew exactly what I was doing." Draco complains. Then he smiles. "But I have good news. They're not together. Noah said himself, just friends."
"I could kiss you right now."
"Please, don't."
Harry laughs, his chest filling with new air. It gives him hope to know that Hermione didn't get back together with Ned.
It means she still feels something for him.
It means he still has a chance. And he's doing whatever it takes to seize it.
She watches Harry from afar as the sun starts to set. Soon they'll sing Happy Birthday and be gone with all the toys and food to give place to the tents. Hermione knows it's not actually camping, but just being able to watch the sky and sit in front of the campfire while telling stories is fun enough. And she's sure Rachel will be more than ecstatic to sleep outside.
Ginny is saying something. Hermione stiffens when she realizes Harry is heading their way. "He's coming." She says to Ginny. "Don't you dare going away." Ginny purses her lips as if annoyed.
"I'm here telling you this amazing story that you're barely listening and I'm the bad friend if I leave you alone with Harry?"
"Yes, exactly." Ginny laughs and shakes her head and just then Harry reaches them. He has a wide smile on his face.
"So, I was thinking," He's talking to her, "time for the Happy Birthday?" He raises his eyebrows, again going his decisions about Rachel through her. Asking for her opinion and permission. She can't help smiling.
"Yes, I think it's about time." He nods.
Then he… extends his hand to her. Hermione frowns, tilting her head, not understanding.
"Well?" He says. "Come on, then." Hermione opens her mouth, but he snorts and takes her hand in his, pulling her to the house. She gives Ginny one last glance and her friend has the audacity to laugh and shrug.
Not having much else to do, she marvels at their hands clasped together as they walk side by side. It feels odd but at the same time… right. Harry looks at her, smiling. She returns the smile and they reach the back door. He opens it for her and they enter the house, both walking to the kitchen.
Rachel chose a chocolate cake and Harry himself baked it. Hermione changes her weight from one foot to another. She doesn't know what to think about Harry's actions. He's treating her as he always did, except there's something different, something more. There's a certainty in the way he touched her today that she's sure never existed. As if… as if she's his.
"Good?" He asks as he motions to the cake. There are three candles on it and a little broom draw with white chocolate. It looks extremely real.
"A broom, really?" Hermione didn't know he would do this. Harry chuckles.
"She loves flying. Don't be so harsh, mama, she can't fly this one." He teases her and she hates the way her heart beats faster at his words.
"I'll… I'll take her and then you come out in what, two minutes?" She asks and he nods.
She turns to leave but- "Hermione," He calls and she stops. "You look breathtaking today." Her mouth hangs open, her words lost, her brain glitching. He opens a seductive smile. "Just wanted you to know." Then he looks down at the cake again and she moves automatically, her feet guiding her away from him as she tries swallowing down the lump in her throat. She feels hot. She's sure she's blushing. Goddammit.
Making a huge effort to stabilize her heart she finally finds Rachel and calls to her. The moment she seizes the little girl in her arms, Harry comes out of the house levitating the cake in front of him and people gather around to sing Happy Birthday. She moves closer to Harry and for a brief moment they share a look. As if only the three of them exist. As if they're alone at their flat celebrating after another day in their routine, after another day of being a family. Hermione allows herself to smile widely at him when he comes even closer and puts an arm around her waist, Rachel between them. His camera is taking photos and Hermione is sure she'll love each one of them. There's no doubt in her mind how happy they look right now.
Harry and Hermione obviously help Rachel blowing out the candles and she claps her hands at the broom, loving it. Then he moves his hand and the camera comes to a stop in front of them. He really pulls her to him, their faces close together. "Look at the photo, baby." He says to Rachel and the girl smiles widely to the camera. Everyone cheers around them. Hermione is not sure how she's feeling, but when Harry takes a step back from her, his hand lingers on her waist and it angers her a little. It angers her that he feels like he can touch her this way after everything. Putting Rachel down on the floor she takes a step back from him and he probably notices something in her eyes because he frowns. But the moment is brief.
"Who wants some cake?" She asks out loud and all the kids yell, Rachel among them. Hermione magically cuts the cake, its pieces on plates flying around the place for people to take it as they please. Rachel goes to sit with Ginny and Harry takes a step closer to her.
"Hermione." She glares at him.
"We need to talk, Harry. Now." She moves fast to the house and he follows. The moment the door closes behind them she turns to him, a finger raised to his face. "What the hell are you doing?"
He clicks his tongue and tilts his head. He has such an innocent look on his face that she doubts her outburst for a moment. The silence stretches between them.
He breaks it. "What exactly are you talking about?" She freezes when he comes closer to her. "Are you talking about the party or… the way I touched you today?" Her heart skips a beat. "Does it bother you?" To make a point he cups her face with one hand, his eyes on her lips. "Does it bother you how I can't resist you?" He leans closer and gives her a gentle kiss on the cheek. "Does it bother you how I find you extremely beautiful?" A kiss on the other cheek. "Tell me, Hermione. Does it bother you that I'm crazy about you?"
She stops breathing. "What? What are you saying?" Her voice is barely there. His thumb goes over her lower lip, then down her neck and shoulder. He sighs.
"I know I ruined everything that day." He doesn't need to be specific, she knows what he's saying. He moves his hand down to her own, squeezing it gently. "I don't expect you to forgive me already, Hermione. The same way I don't expect you to believe me." He shrugs and smiles. "But yeah, I'm crazy about you."
She closes her eyes. He's saying everything she wished from the bottom of her heart, but she finds it impossible to be happy about it. Instead, she's hurting, memories of the day he told her he couldn't tell if he was in love with her or not still very vivid in her heart. That single moment broke her completely.
"Do you enjoy hurting me, Harry?" She whispers.
He blinks, taken aback. But with a new found courage she sees him taking a deep breath and moving even closer, both hands on her face, his forehead touching hers. She doesn't move. "It's the last thing I want, Hermione. The last." He says vehemently. "I enjoy making you smile." He moves back and smiles at her, his thumbs caressing her cheeks. "I enjoy cooking for you." She purses her lips. "I enjoy watching you being an amazing mother to my daughter." She shakes her head at that and moves away from him. He looks crestfallen.
"I'm not her mother, Harry. I'm not Tessa."
"Don't say that, Hermione. You're her mother." She closes her eyes, shaking her head and trying to stop her tears. "But that's not the subject here." He takes a few steps to her again. Hermione crosses her arms.
"What do you want with this, Harry? I wasn't joking when I said I didn't care if you realized you were in love with me. The moment is gone and we're better off as friends. We both know that." She hopes her words sound as firm as she imagined them in her head.
He nods. "I know. I remember pretty well what you said." She thinks he'll touch her again but he pockets his hands. "But I also know I'm not giving up, Hermione. I won't give up on us. Even if it takes years for you to believe my feelings and give me this second chance." He shrugs. "There's no one else I'd rather be with."
She can't help snorting at his words. Of course she has a hard time believing him. He was the one who treated her poorly after the call, the one who seemed to regret their kiss the most. He was the one who thought they shouldn't be together because he wasn't sure if he loved her for real. If he loved her enough to try. All because of Tessa.
She shakes her head. "I'm sorry, Harry. I just- you're my best friend." She looks up at him. "And as best friends we have this amazing relationship. Something special and unique. And after everything that happened between us I don't wanna lose that. Regardless my feelings." He sets his jaw. "We just need to move on from this, Harry."
He scrunches his face and nods. "I understand." She sighs relieved. "But you'll change your mind on this." He opens a side smile. "I know you will." He moves to her again, his face incredibly close to hers. He says into her ear, "And when you do I'll be here waiting."
She holds her breath when he gives her another kiss on the cheek and then walks away.
"Unbelievable." She mutters to herself.
However, as she fetches a glass of water she can't help… smiling a little.
He's putting away the toys and the tables of food. The Weasleys are already setting up their magical tents. Harry and Hermione agreed that they would use muggle ones with Rachel. He looks around, Hermione hasn't come out of the house yet and he glances at the door, waiting to see her, waiting to get a glimpse of some reaction after what he said. He can't believe how easy it was to practically give her his heart. And he's ready to endure whatever she seems fitting.
But he will convince her that they should be together. They love each other.
Ned's voice gets him out of his thoughts. He's saying something about a tent with Draco. Harry is about to seize Rachel from George's enormous tent when Hermione comes from the house. She fixed her hair into a ponytail and is walking to Draco and Ned. She doesn't look his way. But he won't have her talking to her ex as if he's not there. Harry walks over to them, both reaching Draco and Ned at the same time.
Hermione briefly rolls her eyes at him. "Hermione," Ned says, not minding Harry's presence at all. "I was just saying to Draco that I don't have a tent." He shrugs.
"I told him there's plenty of room inside mine and Ginny's."
"Come on, man. I don't wanna ruin your night." Harry already knows where the conversation is heading. "I mean, Hermione, if it's not too much trouble maybe I could share yours?" Harry clears his throat, a heat spreading across his chest. What's this guy even doing here?
"Well," Hermione sounds unsure and not very fond of the idea. Harry feels giddy inside. "I don't know if Rachel will want to sleep with me, Noah, and to be honest it's a muggle tent, there's room for two only."
"You could always share the tent with me, Villin." He says sarcastically. And with the corner of his eye he sees a smile playing on Hermione's lips.
"No need, Potter." He says sharply. And Ned was going to say something else, but the 'beep thingy' they use as healers to warn them of emergencies makes a sound. Groaning, Ned takes it out of his pocket. Hermione is also checking hers. Suddenly Harry's afraid she might leave on their daughter's birthday-
He stops mid-thought. It's the first time ever he thinks of Rachel as their daughter in such a natural way and…
"Oh, there's an emergency at the Department." Ned says. "I need to go, I'm sorry." He shakes his head and Harry watches with narrow eyes as he approaches Hermione and gives her a lingering kiss on the cheek. "See you tomorrow?" His hand is resting on her waist and he can see Ned squeezing her softly. Harry sets his jaw. Hermione just nods and then, to his immense happiness, Villin is gone.
"You don't need to go, do you?" He asks fast.
"No, I can stay, it's fine." Hermione answers and he smiles. She motions ahead. "I'll… set up my tent." She walks away from them and Draco, who was watching the scene unfold, is laughing.
"What's so funny?" Harry asks.
"I mean, I've never seen you in love." He's still laughing. "I hope Hermione gives you the hardest time ever." And Draco walks away.
Harry sighs and chuckles.
Then he walks slowly to George's tent. Rachel needs a bath.
She checks her sleeping bag a last time. No bugs. Good. Hermione remembers pretty well one time she was already inside the bag and she felt a giant bug crawling up her leg. She makes a face, feeling bad by just remembering it. It was not a nice moment. Tessa laughed, though.
She looks up from her small tent and realizes Harry already set the campfire and organized logs around it for everyone to sit, she also notices how he's coming out of George's tent with Rachel in his arms. He changed her clothes into a nice and comfy pajamas. Hermione hopes he did it after a bath. He turns on his way and they spot her. Harry points and comes in her direction.
"Can you watch her? I need to take a shower." He makes a face and settles Rachel on the floor.
"Of course."
"And try figuring out with whom she wants to sleep." He says before heading back to George's tent. Apparently the shower is there.
Hermione sits down on one of the logs with Rachel in her arms. In silence they watch the campfire. There's an intimacy to the moment that feels close to total happiness. Rachel is holding her tightly, extremely knackered after running around and eating without consequences. The bath was the last straw and Hermione knows that she's sleeping even without looking. As her eyes follow the intrinsic and abstract shapes of the fire, she marvels at how much confidence and love Rachel has for her. For the little girl to sleep this peacefully, to relax completely in her arms, to feel safe and shielded from any harm, is just…
People keep saying she's Rachel's mother. Hermione always rejects the idea in a way. Tessa is her mother. Tessa would be there in her place now if things were different. Tessa would give Rachel the same love, the same care, the same attention. Hermione wonders if there will a be time when this kind of thought won't cross her mind, when she'll stop comparing herself to Tessa or even putting herself in a lower place. Sometimes is hard not thinking how her cousin would be a better mother than her… for one she's sure Tessa would mount a broom with Harry and Rachel, sure she would laugh the loudest with them…
But these kind of intrusive thoughts only come when she feels vulnerable. It's not in her nature to doubt herself, but the way Harry said she's Rachel's mother just an hour ago shook her. He fiercely believes in it, and she wishes, more than anything, that she's really up to this position in Rachel's life. She wished she had the same certainty so many people seem to have about her and what she is to Rachel.
Truth is… Hermione is afraid of really owning the part. Of really seeing herself as her mother and then… she doesn't know what it would do to her to be brutally taken from this place. She doesn't lie when she says she still believes in Tessa's recovery. Thinking that way she can never allow herself to be this important, to fill these shoes…
And not just in Rachel's life. In Harry's also. He said he's crazy about me- The fire cracks and she blinks. Sighing, she holds Rachel tighter.
"Hey." She jumps a little. Harry is sitting down by her side. His hair still a little wet and just like Rachel he's wearing sweatpants and a comfortable jumper. "The shower at George's tent is amazing." He smiles. "I can watch her if you want to change clothes or something."
She observes him in silence. The stars and the fire witnesses to their moment. Could he really mean what he said? Does he really want a second chance? Should she give him one? What if he breaks her completely? Even worse than before? What if Tessa wakes?
"What?" He asks, tilting his head. She doesn't miss the way he's sitting extremely close. "Do I have something on my face or are you just mesmerize by how handsome I am?" He raises an eyebrow and she chuckles, shaking her head.
"I was actually thinking how rude you were to Noah earlier."
His posture changes at that. "I won't apologize." He shrugs. "I'm jealous of him, okay? His presence irks me."
She opens her mouth. "Harry." She practically grunts his name, a warm sensation taking over her to hear from him how jealous he is. "There's nothing more between me and Noah." She feels the need to say it and just as she does, she realizes he already knows.
He leans closer to her. "I can't say I'm sorry to hear that." His voice is low and hot against her cheek, his breath of fresh mint. His eyes fall to her lips. Then go back to hers. Against her will, her toes curl at the intensity of this simple motion. It's like he wants to devour her. Move!
At once she stands and clears her throat. "I'll take a shower and change." Harry takes sleeping Rachel from her arms and Hermione feels incredibly irritated by how smug he looks.
As she heads to George's tent, she can't tell if Harry's new attitude annoys or pleases her. Maybe she needs more time to find out.
He watches her go. It's absurd how extremely lighter and carefree he feels after being honest with her. He knows there's still a long way ahead of them, but he's not worried. At all. He sighs and kisses Rachel's head. Draco and Ginny are coming from their tent with big smiles, holding hands. For a moment, Harry can't help wishing it could be him and Hermione.
"So, story time?" Ginny asks.
He shrugs. "The birthday girl is already dreaming her stories, I believe." They share a chuckle. Everyone is gathering around, sitting and talking. Harry observes the Weasleys and can't help feeling a little strange. He rarely thinks about it, but… he misses Ron. He misses his jokes and irreverent way. "Gin, do you know about Ron?" She seems surprised by his question.
"Well, the last time I asked mum she said he's traveling the world. Experiencing new things." She shrugs and as if considering something she leans forward and says in a low voice. "I'm not sure I should tell you this, but he sent me a letter a while ago." Harry widens his eyes. "He said he misses everyone. Said he's sorry about the way he behaved and…" She bites her lower lip. "I think he still loves Hermione. I think he won't come back until the feeling goes away, you know? I mean, we all know how intense their relationship was." Ginny shrugs. "Don't tell her, though, please. Ron doesn't want to talk to her. At least, not yet."
Harry nods. Something very bizarre taking over him. He remembers a day, a long time ago, right after Tessa's accident, when Hermione said she missed Ron and their relationship. At the time it didn't bother him, but now it does. Now he wonders what Hermione would do if Ron returned to their lives and tried getting back together with her. Would she? Take him back?
He moves, uncomfortable.
But before he can dwell on the thought, Molly begins to tell a tale. An old tale she used to read to her children when they couldn't sleep. Ginny says she remembers this one and Arthur points out it was Fred's favorite. Harry looks down, a pain on his chest at the memory of Fred. Rachel or any other children there hadn't had the chance to know uncle George's other half and that's just plain sad. Inevitably his mind drifts to Tessa. Rachel probably doesn't remember her anymore. Harry tries taking her to St. George's at least one time every month, but he knows that Rachel is too young to actually understand everything, too young to grasp the concept of who Tessa really is and what happened to her.
He feels a warm hand taking his. He doesn't have to look up. He knows her. He knows the warmth of her body, the smoothness of her skin. Still looking down he intertwines their fingers and brings Rachel closer to his chest. Even with so much sorrow in his past, he can't help feeling… happy.
Hermione can't deny how pleasant the night was. They told stories and laughed in earnest as the children began to succumb to sleep around them. In the end Rachel didn't enjoy much of the camping experience - since she slept through it - but the adults did and it was heartwarming. Molly knows an incredible variety of tales and Hermione learned some already. She could share them with Rachel when she's a little older.
She sighs. Thoughts about the future always stir something in her. They make her… uneasy. But, shaking her head she enters her sleeping bag and warms the inside of her tent. Rachel kept sleeping in Harry's arms so he decided taking her to his tent - that is a few feet away from hers. Draco and Ginny's backyard is indeed enormous.
She closes her eyes and soon is fast asleep.
"Hermione." A voice calls to her in the distance. "Hermione." A hand shakes her foot and a small sniff makes her open her eyes.
Harry is there, halfway inside her tent, Rachel too. She blinks. Then she notices the little girl has tears on her face. "What happened?" Her voice is hoarse from sleep. Rachel is already hugging her.
"Mama, I'm scared."
"Shh, baby, it's okay. Mama is here." Hermione hugs her back.
"I think she woke in the middle of the night and realized she wasn't in her bed. She got scared and I tried soothing her but… she wanted her mother." Hermione closes her eyes at his words and kisses Rachel's face. The little girl is already a lot calmer.
"What time is it?" Hermione asks.
"Probably 3am." They both make a face remembering the first months after Tessa's accident and all the sleepless nights they had because of Rachel's nightmares. Rachel releases Hermione and they sit together. Harry smiles. "So, I guess dada is disposable now." He jokes and begins to back up to exit the tent.
"No, dada! Stay."
Of course. Hermione purses her lips. Harry looks at her as if asking for permission and she shrugs. He opens a side smile and fully enters the tent, sitting too. Immediately Hermione feels hot. Harry is… large. The tent isn't that big for the three of them so they're almost touching, a hair of distance between them. Harry clears his throat.
"What if we gaze at the stars?" He says. "We can lie down and I'll tell you all about them."
"You know things about the stars?" Hermione asks.
"Well, I paid Astronomy some attention."
She chuckles. Harry magically enlarges Hermione's sleeping bag in a way that it can hold the three of them. She hesitates while Harry enters the bag. To be inside a little sleeping bag with Harry is just… not a good idea. But Rachel is also there.
He narrows his eyes at her. "Come on, Hermione."
Not having much of a choice she lies back down and inside the bag, Rachel is resting her head on Hermione's arm and Harry is on the other side. Close, very close.
"Okay, look up." He says and moves his hand. The cover of the tent is magically gone and they can see the sky. Then, Harry enchants it in a way that it seems like they're looking at it through the lens of a telescope. It's a nice illusion. Rachel squeals, delighted. "Now, pay attention." Harry points up. "Rach, can you see those three bright stars? Right where I'm pointing?" Rachel perks up and squints.
"Yes!" She exclaims. Hermione smiles.
"Good, they're close together, aren't they? Well, they have a name, do you believe it? It's Orion's belt." Rachel seems fascinated. "Why a belt? If you look up," He points, "there are two other stars, a little further from each other, then, if you look down there are two other. They represent Orion's arms and legs. Orion was a hunter."
Hermione is… baffled. She never imagined Harry could tell stars apart, much less point out constellations. He keeps explaining a few things to Rachel and she tries not… getting butterflies in her stomach. It's ridiculous how his lecture is turning her on. Merlin, get a grip. She's at least relieved his attention is on Rachel, because she knows that if he looked at her he would be able to tell. She's probably blushing. Hermione tries breathing steadily and focusing on how much Rachel is enjoying the moment.
Harry keeps talking, delighted to be sharing his knowledge with his daughter, but then he stops. Hermione frowns. He's pointing at a star. The single brightest star visible from Earth. "That's the brightest star, sweetie." His voice is low. "Beautiful, isn't it?" There's a hint of sadness on his voice and Hermione moves her foot inside the bag. She immediately finds his and he rubs it on hers. Even with both wearing socks, the contact gives her a pleasant chill.
"What's its name, dada?"
Harry has a hard time answering and Hermione helps. "It's called Sirius, pumpkin." Rachel turns to her, as if marveled that Hermione knows these stuff too.
"Really, mama?"
"Yes. A beautiful name, isn't it?"
Rachel agrees and Hermione sees the single tear falling from Harry's eye. Rachel yawns and scoots closer to her. Harry resumes talking. Hermione is listening carefully, his informations correct. But then-
"She's asleep." She murmurs to him and he stops mid sentence. A slow smile spreads across his face. Hermione's heart skips a beat. "So, you can give massages, you can cook and you can also tell the constellations apart." Hermione jokes, he holds back a laugh. "What you can't do, Harry?"
He puts a finger on his chin, mockingly thinking. "I can't dance." She chuckles and pulls Rachel closer to her. Harry is also getting closer. The three occupying almost one spot.
"But seriously, I know you didn't learn all this on Astronomy lessons." She prods.
"Yeah, I… at the Auror training there were nights I couldn't sleep and gazing at the stars was my favorite thing to do. After a while I was recognizing each one of them. My superior noticed and gave me a book he had. Then I learned all the names." He shrugs. "I guess it's impossible to forget now."
She nods and they fall into a comfortable silence. Harry moves his hand and the illusion is gone. It's pretty clear inside the tent because of a spell Hermione casted earlier so they can see each other and he's… pouting at her.
"Can I sleep here?" He asks shyly and nudges her with his foot. "Please?" She's already denying with her head- "I mean, it's warm in here, and my tent is so far away. And I'm afraid of the dark, Hermione. Be nice to me." He tries not smiling. "What if Rachel wakes up again and suddenly wants her dad? You'll have to go all the way over to my tent and that's just silly while I'm right. Here." He emphasizes what he's saying by pulling her legs with his inside the bag.
"Harry." She warns him. He scoots even closer, Rachel the only thing between them. She sighs. He's still pouting. "You're so dramatic. Such a leo." His hand finds hers. She rolls her eyes. "Fine. Stay." He smiles. "But behave."
"Of course! I mean, there's Rachel between us, not even if I-"
"Okay, okay."
However, Rachel's head in under Hermione's chin, pressed against her chest and Harry moves so close that their noses are almost touching as they lie there on their sides. Her on her right, him on his left. And they just… look at each other. It unsettles her the enormity of affection and love she sees on his gaze. And she's bewitched. By the green of his eyes, by the warmth of his legs on hers. He slowly moves his head and his nose touches hers, it's like a caress. She moves her head too, corresponding. It's so intimate. So… them.
They stay that way until they fall asleep. Their hands clasped together. Their daughter between them.