Side Chapter 8: The Art of Being Hunted

Kota was a scumbag. Everyone in the office where Terry worked knew that. He was a philandering, womanizing jerk. And yet, Terry found himself jealous of Kota. They were both deer, but they looked as different as night and day. Kota was deep chested, broad shouldered, and had a chiseled face like a movie star. Terry was slim, scrawny, and had antlers so small they barely could be considered antlers. In a more primitive world, Kota would be the leader of whatever tribe they were in, and Terry would be some unfortunate undesirable sadly shrinking around hoping he ever found meaning in life.

As it was, Terry looked down at his lunch and chewed morosely as Kota regaled the other male workers at Brushwick's Marketing with last weekend's exploits. Everyone in their department was aware of Kota's weekend habits. Each Friday and Saturday night, he'd go pick up a new woman for a fling before moving on to the next one. And somehow there were always women that were happy to bed him.

"I'm telling you, it was pretty intense. I think I might have invented a new position. I'm calling it the French Dip. Two chicks kissing furiously while you—"

Terry flushed, his eyes wide, and he refocused his attention on his sandwich. He would never have the nerve to talk about something like that in public. Let alone at his job! Well… not like he really could talk about anything like that. Much to Terry's embarrassment he still hadn't actually lost his virginity. He told the other guys in the office, when they had asked over drinks after work one night, that his first time had been with a girlfriend he had in highschool. However, there had never been any girlfriend apart from his own hand. And Terry definitely wasn't going to admit to that.

Terry hadn't even noticed that it was just him and Kota in the breakroom until Kota sat down across from him and grinned.

"So, Terry. You got a lady friend you've been seeing recently?"

Terry nervously shook his head and took a drink of water.

"N-nope. I'm just… focusing on my career for now."

Kota lightly punched his shoulder.

"Don't be coy with me! I can tell a guy going through a dry spell when I see one. You haven't gotten your rocks off in a while, huh?"

Terry shrugged.

"Well… you know how it is. Not a lot of girls to talk to here at work… that aren't at least old enough to be my mother."

Kota laughed.

"Ah, Terry. You crack me up. Tell you what, I'll give you some advice. Want to get some action?"

Terry looked around before coughing.

"Well… yeah."

"Here's the secret. Land some carnivore chicks."

Terry was mid drink when Kota said that. He spluttered and coughed before giving the other deer an incredulous look.

"C-carnivore females?!"

Kota winked.

"I land them all the time. Heck, sometimes I prefer them to herbivore gals. There's just something deeply erotic about crossing that danger zone and laying pipe where it's supposed to be forbidden."

Terry wiped his mouth.

"Gee, Kota. You have such a way with words."

Kota ignored him and leaned closer.

"Here's what you do. Go to a bar with lots of carnivore ladies, there's a couple like that on Arbor Street. Find a table in the corner by yourself and order a drink, but don't really drink it. Just sort of sip on it. Now, this is key, you need to look vulnerable. I usually go for the 'wistful and brokenhearted' vibe myself. And then, watch as the babes flock to you."

Terry, despite himself, laughed.

"There is absolutely no way that works!"

As Terry stood and began to walk away, Kota clicked his tongue.

"Doubt all you want, it's just psychology."

Terry paused.

"Psychology?"

"Yeah. I took Psych 101 in college. Apparently, when carnivores drink, their instincts get a bit fuzzy. The more they drink, the more suppressed they become. So you're aiming for women who're a little buzzed, but not drunk yet. Because that's when they're in the 'butter zone'."

"The… 'butter zone'?"

Kota grinned.

"Yeah, when their instincts start to melt and slide together. What you're doing is activating their hunting instincts. By separating yourself from the herd and looking vulnerable, they'll unconsciously start to hunt you. But, with the booze putting them into the butter zone, they aren't feeling the need to eat. Instead, it slides to the next closest urge."

"You don't mean…."

"Oh yeah I do! They get horny like a stegosaur. And after that, you just gotta make sure you leave when you're done. Don't want to let them leave the ol' butter zone when they wake up and go back to being normal carnivores. That is, unless you want to end up as their breakfast. Which hey, I don't kink shame. I can think of worse ways to go than being eaten by a hot chick after you smash."

Terry grimaced. Kota was just such a scumbag! Why on Earth did women like him?! Finally, Terry sniffed.

"Thanks for the advice, but I'll probably pass. I'm not exactly the type to hook up with anyone."

But then Friday rolled around. Terry was at his home after work, looking at his online dating profile. He had made it a few weeks ago in the hopes of possibly finding a girlfriend. And yet, not a single woman had been interested in him so far. He'd even made sure to use photos that made him look a bit more muscular than he actually was. It wasn't catfishing per se, just… exaggerating.

Terry lay back on his bed and looked at the clock. Eight p.m. He was sitting alone in his apartment at eight on a Friday.

(Am I just ugly or boring? Or both. I'm definitely going to die alone, aren't I?)

Terry looked at his desk where his computer was. He could always… entertain himself. But then, Kota's words from earlier that week ran through his head. Terry wavered back and forth. He put on some clothes for going out, but then sat on the couch insisting that he wasn't going to go to a bar. Back and forth, back and forth, Terry just couldn't make up his mind. Finally, he stood and left his apartment, not pausing to give himself time to reconsider until he was already in a somewhat busy bar.

(What am I even doing here? This is not my scene! And I am not really looking for a one-time fling. I want a relationship, not meaningless sex!)

And then his eyes caught a very beautiful female deer at the bar. She was sipping on a colorful drink while chatting with a female horse friend of hers. Terry gulped and sidled his way towards her. After being jostled around a bit, he made his way to the bar and stood beside where she was. Terry deliberately didn't look at her as he gestured for the barkeep.

"I'll have…."

(What's a masculine drink? What's something cool guys order?)

"…One whiskey please."

The barkeep nodded and set out a glass. He poured a shot of brown liquor inside and slid it to Terry. Terry took it and drew a deep breath.

(Okay. Act cool. Just… say hello.)

Terry turned to the female deer and smiled.

"Hey! How's it going?"

The female glanced at him and smiled politely.

"It's going fine."

And then turned back to her friend. Terry licked his lips.

"So, uh, I'm Terry. What's your name?"

The deer sighed and turned back towards him.

"Look. I'm here with friends. I'm not interested."

Terry nodded.

"O-oh! Okay! Yeah, I get that. No worries."

He took a sip of his drink and gagged. It tasted like pain and burned his tongue. The doe rolled her eyes and turned her back on him resolutely. Terry, his pride wounded, shuffled away in defeat. He kept towards the door, where most of the other herbivores were situated. As was the case with lots of bars and other social establishments, the herbivores and carnivores self-segregated unless they specifically knew each other. Terry glowered at his drink and looked around the bar. He saw another female deer sitting by herself a bit away, looking at her phone. Terry plucked up his courage and moved towards her. When he was at her table, he smiled.

"Hey! How's it going?"

The doe looked up and nodded politely.

"I'm doing well, thank you."

"Do you come here often?"

The doe furrowed her brow.

"No, not really."

"Oh… cool. Me too. My name's Terry!"

She nodded.

"Nice to meet you Terry. I'm Enyi."

"Ah, cool name. Very cool."

Enyi tilted her head a bit.

"Are you… flirting with me?"

Terry licked his lips.

"Well… yes."

She smiled sadly at him.

"I'm sorry, Terry. But I have a boyfriend. I'm meeting him here."

Terry nodded.

"Oh! Yeah! That's great! Uh, thanks for telling me. I'll… leave you to that."

Defeated, Terry moved to the edge of the room where he could feel bad about himself in peace. He felt absolutely humiliated and angry with himself for even coming to this bar. All he had succeeded in doing was making himself miserable. Terry sighed and slumped against the table, rolling his undrunk whiskey around. Maybe he should just bite the bullet and start collecting rocks or bugs. If he was going to be alone forever he might as well find something to dull the existential pain of being alive.

"Rough night, huh?"

Terry jumped and looked up. A female wolf had slid into the seat across from him and was eyeing him hungrily. Terry froze as he took in her full appearance. She was taller than him by a decent bit, and had a more strongly built frame. Her fur was the color of the whiskey in his glass, dark tan bordering brown, with pure white fur down her throat and chest. She was wearing comfortable looking clothes, jeans and a jacket, but what he couldn't stop glancing at were her fangs. Long, razor sharp, and pearly white. As she smiled, they poked dangerous out of her maw. A long, sharp claw tapped the side of her drink, a bright red liquid that fizzed slightly. The wolf chuckled, yellow eyes narrowing as she looked him over.

"Sorry! Didn't mean to startle you."

Terry was in a full panic. Why was this wolf talking to him? As he glanced around, he realized he had inadvertently sat somewhere almost nobody could see, a secluded table in a corner near the back door. If she wanted to, this wolf could easily overpower Terry and drag him outside to devour him. And because of how loud the conversation in the bar was, Terry doubted anyone would notice.

"Mind if I join you?" The wolf asked. Terry just stared at her, his breath quickening. Whatever he did, he had to be sure he didn't make this dangerous female angry.

"No…. Go ahead."

The wolf nodded and took a sip of her drink. She tilted her head and raised an eyebrow, eyeing him up and down like a piece of meat.

"Are you going to introduce yourself?"

"Sorry! Uh… my name's Terry."

Terry then picked up his drink and took another sip. He then immediately shuddered and barely stopped himself from spitting it out. The wolf bared her fangs a bit, her voice a low growl.

"You know… typically this is when you ask what my name is."

"Ah! Sorry! Uh, what's your name?"

"It's May, nice to meet you."

Terry nodded quickly and returned his attention to his drink. Those yellow, hungry eyes flicked to the glass of whiskey.

"Are you enjoying drinking that?"

"Uh… not really."

"I figured as much. C'mon, let's get you something better."

She stood and began to walk to the bar. She paused halfway and beckoned with her clawed fingers.

"Come on. That means you."

Terry shuddered, but hesitantly followed her. She was so aggressive and forceful! This was a terrible idea! He should just run away while he still could! This May lady was a bloodthirsty, predatory carnivore who'd tear his arm off just as soon as shake his hand!

May stopped at the bar and beckoned the barkeep.

"Hey, how about a… whiskey sour. You seem like a whiskey sour sort of guy, Terry."

Terry shrugged and waited for some indication as to what he needed to do. Eventually she handed him a drink which was nothing like what Terry expected. It was bright yellow-orange with fruit pieces in it. May handed it to him with a toothy grin. The sight of her fangs still terrified Terry.

"Give this a try!"

With a squeak, Terry took a mouthful of the cocktail. It was… actually good! Fruity and tart with a little hint of sweetness. Terry took a second drink and May laughed.

"Better, huh?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Sweet. Let's go back to our table before someone else snatches it."

Terry went stiff as a board as May grabbed his shoulder and began to steer him back to their table. Her fingers were so sharp and strong they were like steel. She pushed him back into his seat and sat across from him with her teeth bared.

"So, Terry, tell me about yourself."

Terry blinked.

"Uh… huh?"

"You know, what you do and all that."

"Oh! Uh, I work in marketing. Mainly… data analytics."

"So are you good with computers?"

"I guess a bit."

"Hah, not me! I'm absolutely hopeless with them! I leave the fancy tech junk to smarties like you."

Terry shrugged, taking another sip of his drink.

"I'm nothing special. Just know enough to get work done."

"Bah! Quit being modest. Did you originally set out to be in marketing?"

Terry shook his head.

"Hmm, no. I went to school to be an accountant, but I couldn't make it in the accounting program. So I swapped to business."

May swirled her drink with her straw, tilting her head a bit.

"So you wanted to be an accountant? Were you always good with math or something?"

Terry shook his head, a sour look on his face.

"Not really. I just sort of picked that because they make decent money."

"Well what did you want to do?"

"I don't know! Nothing! I've always sort of sucked at everything!"

Terry took an angry swig of his drink before gritting his teeth. Finally, he sighed.

"Sorry. So… what about you? What do you do?"

May closed her eyes, her tail swishing a bit.

"Well I work in a hotel. Front desk manager."

"Is that what you wanted to do?"

"Nope! I wanted to be a chef. I guess we both didn't get what we wanted, huh?"

Terry laughed bitterly.

"I'm pretty sure nobody does. To quote someone, 'Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something.' We're all just miserable and alone. Insignificant specks in an uncaring world, just trying to find a reason to get out of bed in the morning."

May shook her head.

"So you're a nihilist then? You think life is meaningless and nothing matters?"

Terry furrowed his brow and looked down at his fingers. Was he a nihilist? He'd never really thought about it. But he might be. Nothing did seem to matter. Heck, he barely cared if he woke up in the morning. After a few seconds of internal deliberation, Terry shrugged.

"I might be."

"Hmm… well, I have something to show you that might change your mind. Finish your drink and come with me."

Maybe it was the alcohol, but Terry did as May said. With his empty glass on the table, Terry stood and followed May out the back door. He found himself in a dark, empty alley behind the bar. Terry frowned.

"So what's this thing you want to—"

His words were cut off as May slammed him against the wall. Terry gasped, but before he could make a noise she clamped his mouth shut with her hand. Terry watched in horror as May bared her fangs and tilted his head up a bit, exposing his neck. She slowly opened her mouth and got in position to tear his throat out. Terry could feel her claws pricking his muzzle; her moist, hot breath hitting his neck; could see her hunter's eyes locked on his.

Terry squirmed, and struggled against her. But she didn't even budge for all his efforts. Finally, Terry went limp, accepting the inevitable. She was going to devour him. He looked into her eyes for a shred of mercy, and flattened his ears. Terry pleaded with her with his eyes, desperate to live. Suddenly, May let him go and stepped away with a smirk. Terry slumped against the wall with a gasp. Bewildered, he looked at May.

"I had you going for a second, didn't I?"

"H-huh?"

"Well, I heard the best way to deal with a nihilist was to kill them. If they actually believe that it doesn't matter if they live or die, they'll just accept their death. But if they desperately try to live, that means that they actually do believe that their life matters! Well, there you have it. You're not a nihilist."

Terry just stared at her in confusion as she waved with her fingers.

"Bye, Terry! Thanks for the drink!"

Terry watched as she turned and walked out of the alley. He held a hand to his throat and panted for air.

"W-what… just happened! Ah crap, I think I pissed myself."

Terry couldn't forget that moment for the next week. He kept returning to that bizarre meeting in the bar over and over again. It had been terrifying, but also exhilarating. Was that what most people's lives were like? Did they go out on the weekend, get drunk, and do dangerous and crazy things to feel alive? Whatever the case was, the next Friday he was back at the same bar sitting at the same table as before.

Terry wasn't sure what he was waiting for. May? Or someone else interesting. He couldn't decide. He just wanted that same feeling again, of truly feeling alive. And a few minutes later he was rewarded as May sat down at his table again.

"Hey! Look who it is!" May said with a grin. She made a rolling gesture with a clawed finger.

"And this time you don't look like you want to drown yourself in your drink!"

Terry inclined his head.

"Hey, May. How's it going?"

"Eh, can't complain. Hotel biz is hotel biz. How's the marketing going?"

"Well I mainly just get the data and put it into reports for everyone else. So I mainly just sit at a desk all day and stare at a screen."

May crossed her arms.

"You need more excitement in your life! Do you at least have a hobby?"

Terry shook his head. May rolled her eyes.

"Figures. C'mon, let's play some darts."

Terry shrugged and followed behind her as she wove her way to one of the dart boards located along the walls. She retrieved the darts and carefully aimed her first throw.

"Is there any sort of hobby you want to get into?"

"Gee, I don't really know. I'm not sure what guys my age do for a hobby."

May threw her dart, and it landed in an outer ring of the target.

"Well, you could collect something. Like trading cards or stamps."

"Eh, not my type of fun."

"Well, Terry, what is your type of fun?"

Terry took his place and threw his first dart.

"Well… this is actually pretty fun. More fun than I've had in ages."

"So join an amateur darts team? Or just some other team, like baseball or bowling."

"Do you have a team you're a part of?"

"Nah, I just occasionally go bowling with friends."

Terry nodded, taking a sip of his drink.

"You know, this is nice. Hanging out, having some drinks. Listen, I'm sorry if I was awkward at first. I'll be honest, I was a little scared of you."

May grinned.

"Got over your fears that quickly? What's your secret?"

Terry held up his cup.

"Booze."

"Cheers, I'll drink to that!"

They touched glasses and Terry finished his drink. After a few more rounds of darts, Terry smiled at May.

"You know, we should do this every weekend! Come here for a few drinks. Play some games, have some laughs. How about it?"

May laughed.

"Sounds good to me!"

"Hey, May?" Terry suddenly grew serious. "Why'd you come over and talk to me last week?"

May shrugged.

"You looked absolutely miserable. What can I say, I'm a sucker for a guy who looks like he's about to start crying."

Terry snorted derisively.

"As if! I was just a bit bummed out after those two girls hardcore rejected me. I was not about to cry!"

"Keep telling yourself that, Terry."

By the time they left the bar, Terry was a bit buzzed. He hadn't had too much to drink, but he was definitely feeling the alcohol. Terry looked at May and sighed.

"Well… I guess this is goodbye."

May smiled and nodded her head.

"Guess it is."

Terry looked at the female wolf. She wasn't all that scary now that he'd spent some time around her. Sure she had pointed teeth and claws, but she had kind eyes and a warm smile. Terry looked her up and down before licking his lips.

(Screw it.)

As May was about to turn and leave, Terry stepped forward and kissed her. The wolf's eyes widened and she stepped back in surprise.

"Wooooooooooh! Hold on a second…." She breathed. Terry winced.

"Sorry, was that too much? It's just… maybe I'm a little drunk, but you're really hot. And you actually talk to me. Sorry, I'll just go."

As he turned, May caught his arm. He turned as she batted her eyelashes at him.

"Maybe I'm a little drunk too, but you're kinda cute for a deer."

"W-what does that mean?"

She leaned in and whispered in his ear.

"It means that you should come back here next week."

And with that, she slipped off into the night. Terry walked home, grinning like a fool. And then over the next week he berated himself for being so stupid.

(A wolf and a deer?! That's absurd! Gosh, hopefully this doesn't make things weird. I'd hate for our friendship to fall apart so soon just because I get a bit… weird when drunk.)

[The next Friday.]

Terry and May laughed as they walked through the door of her apartment. It was late, and they'd spent a long night cutting loose after a week of work. May took a seat on the couch as Terry got himself a bottle of water from the fridge.

"May, why are we at your apartment?"

May giggled and shot him a hungry look.

"Don't you know what happens after the third date?"

Terry gave her a confused look.

"We're dating?"

"Figure of speech."

"Uh… no I don't. I haven't exactly dated much."

May lithely got to her feet and stalked towards him. She slowly corralled him towards the bedroom as she teasingly nipped his ear.

"Well, the third date is the one where I get to gobble you up."

Terry fell backwards onto the bed.

"W-what do you mean by that?"

May's eyes flashed in the dim light as she forced his arms apart, pinning him down. She licked her lips and moved closer, her mouth gently brushing his ear.

"Don't worry. I'll be gentle."