Disclaimer: The following is a fan-written fiction, the views and opinions in this story are not intended to be viewed as those of the author. Ranma 1/2, Urusei Yatsura, Inuyasha, and Five Pound Gospel are the creations of Rumiko Takahashi, property of their respective rights holders and publishers. Please support the official releases.

CW: This story will contain violence, strong language, sexual humor and situations, drug use, Moroboshi Ataru, and Happosai. You've been warned.

|Hello World|

"You know," Nabiki said as she watched Katie and Akane spar at lunch later that day. "I kind of expected the two of you to take those Ls a lot harder than you have."

Katie and Akane were rapidly trading punches, blocking and redirecting each other's strikes like well-oiled machines. While Akane's strikes were extremely fast, Katie seemed to know both where her kouhai's hands would be and how her hands would be positioned to intercept the strikes. Akane on the other hand was nimbler, ducking and weaving with impressive neck work any punches she couldn't parry.

Stopping and bowing to signal a time out so no one got knocked out trying to talk to the person kibitzing from the side, Katie turned to Nabiki.

"Well, neither of us lost cuz we didn't take 'em seriously," Katie reasoned, rather casual about it.

"Besides, the fight ended before we got a second wind," Akane said, before snorting, "And it's not like I'm not pissed–it's just there's better ways to put my energy to use."

Nabiki rolled her eyes, figuring her little sister was trying to be cool in front of her Senpai. "So, have you figured out that guy didn't go down when you clocked him?"

Akane grimaced but refrained from snapping at her sister.

"They gave the names of those wrestler guys you mentioned, if I heard 'em right." Katie reasoned. "Even if it wasn't really them, maybe they learned somethin' similar."

"… Yeah," Akane said, nodding, "It was like I was hitting him, but he wasn't taking the full brunt of it. I might as well have been punching paper that's floating in the air."

Katie hummed as she pictured it. "Sounds right. It's a good way to avoid getting hurt while performing–but in a real fight something like that is impossible without the cooperation of your opponent. You need to have super sharp reflexes and to know where the attack is coming from and what you need to do to avoid harm."

Nabiki chimed in. "Not that the guy minded the pain."

"Don't remind me." Akane complained, feeling revulsion forcing bile up as she thought about it.

"That's why next time, I'll have a go at him," Katie said, nodding a little as she formulated a response, "If I'm right, he ain't gonna like a round with me. The other guy'll be tricky though. He ain't gotta be close to do his damage."

Nabiki nodded. "Didn't he, like, long range slap you with 'it?'"

"NABIKI!" Akane yelled, she really didn't need that image to even begin to make its way into her head.

Katie chuckled at Akane's discomfort. "Well, while it was with a whole different kind of sword, that attack of his was not unlike Kuno's."

"Ugh." Akane rolled her eyes.

While they were on the subject. "So, it's like the thing Kuno did with his bokken… and what you did to block it before you disarmed him."

Katie punched her fist into her palm and nodded. "As sure as an Oregon rainy season. Pushing the air around with a punch or kick is possible if yer strong enough. Heck, there's even a name for the actual technique: Cavitation."

Akane was intrigued. "Cavitation?"

Katie nodded. "Mmhm! It's displacing the air with such force that a bubble of low-pressure forms around your fist. When your movement stops, connection or not, the bubble goes on and collapses–creatin' a shockwave that hits and goes through whatever you're punchin'."

That sounded incredibly simple to Akane. Too simple. "Wait… that's all it is?"

Katie nodded again. "I mean, the trainin' for it is ridiculous–and dangerous–but if you can master it? Woo doggie…"

Nabiki chimed in. "Do you know how to train it?"

"Sure do, I did it myself." Katie proudly revealed. "It requires you to take a swim to about two hundred meters below the ocean, and practice punchin' when you're on the bottom until you start cavitatin'."

Akane blanched.

"And you gotta do it on yer breath alone, no scuba gear or anythin' like that. The equipment would get in the way anyway."

Akane went even whiter.

Katie sensed it. "… You okay?"

"I-I'm fine…" Akane coughed. "I'm just… not a good swimmer."

And now she understood. "Aw… sorry if I triggered some fears there, hon."

Bowing her head, Akane sighed. "You have no idea…"

"From what I saw," Nabiki recalled as she tapped a finger to her chin, "You seemed more surprised he could do it at all."

Katie nodded. "It was a shock for sure that he could punch with his junk. It hit hard up close but didn't have a whole lotta reach."

Akane refrained from getting upset.

Nabiki didn't let the opportunity slip by. "A common malady amongst Japanese males… or so I've heard."

"Gosh!" Akane felt her cheeks flair up.

"… Wasn't where I was headed with that, but considerin' the force would be tied to how hard he could thrust…" Katie said, pondering the dimensions of the earlier encounter. "Next time, you should take him."

Akane raised an eyebrow. "So switch up our opponents?"

"His slightly below average length is exploitable," Katie explained, ignoring Nabiki's snicker and Akane's paling. "Yer the one from a school that also uses weapons, right?"

"Well, yeah." Akane wasn't sure how exactly it was relevant.

"Then ya simply use somethin' that can bang that buck down from outside his range." Katie said as if it was the simplest thing.

Nabiki coughed to dispel the awkward atmosphere from how Katie phrased that. "Anyway, even with most of the laws rescinded, there was no way they were gonna leave guns lying around."

"Wasn't meaning that," Katie said, looking thoughtful. "They teachin' anythin' like archery here?"

"Yeah, but I refused to join any of the clubs because of Kuno," Akane said, "And I don't want to rely on that."

"But ya got somethin' in mind?" Katie asked.

"Yeah, I think I got an idea," Akane said, nodding a bit.

Nabiki was about to say something when a figure suddenly dropped in practically on top of her. "Ah?!"

"Oop, sorry! Forgot to check if the LZ was cleared!" Kaori apologized, rubbing the back of her neck.

"Howdy, girl," Katie greeted, "What's got you in such a hurry?"

Kaori turned to her and Akane. "I did some poking around, asked some questions, and fell back on my months of deliveries round Nerima, but I know where the Sickle Gang's hideout is."

Akane grew serious. "Where?!"

"It's at a gay bar in Taian called Ikemen Teikoku." Kaori revealed. "It's actually one of the more popular ones, and the food's pretty good, too…"

Nabiki gave Kaori a look. "You're not trying to sell us on going there."

"You wouldn't even be allowed to go in, you high schoolers," said the young woman the same age as Katie and Nabiki.

Katie gave Kaori a chop atop her head. "She means goin' on about stuff that ain't pertinent to the situation–and besides, there ain't a bar I've been to that a fake ID can't get me in."

Nabiki took Katie's height into the equation. "Not surprised."

Kaori rubbed her scalp. "We won't need IDs anyway if we just storm the place with the boys from Butsumetsu and thrash the ever-loving life out of Kamaitachi and his friends."

On that, Katie agreed. "True that, but this kinda raises a few questions now…"

Now Kaori was curious. "Like…?"

When Katie answered, there was an edge of annoyance in her voice. "Thems questions are more for Kamaitachi durin' or after I'm done mashin' his face into fertilizer."

"What about our vengeful idiots?" Nabiki asked. "Should we get them in on this or what?"

Katie shook her head. "Ryūnosuke ain't a problem for the moment, but Ucchan is…"

"Don't worry about him," Kaori replied, "I sent him on his way to Tofu's to get patched up. He'll probably be good to go by sundown."

Nabiki had a thought. "… Did you take him to Tofu's, or did you just tell him to go there?"

Kaori turned to her. "I told him to go, and he said he would."

Nabiki nodded. "… How'd you get him to cool off?"

"I told him I know where the hideout is, but I didn't tell him where specifically," Kaori replied.

Realizing what Nabiki was inferring, Kaori grew annoyed. "Hey! Ucchan may be a stubborn idiot, but even he recognized the bad shape he was in! He wouldn't be able to lift his spatula to swing it at Kamaitachi, let alone fight him inside his own hideout!"

Nabiki let out a sigh and pulled out her phone. "Just to be sure… let's give the Doc a call."

Katie looked at Akane, who was fuming at Nabiki's complete lack of faith, then at Kaori. "… Hon, let the girl call him."

Shutting her eyes, Kaori took a deep breath. "She has to be wrong, because otherwise…"

The call connected, and Nabiki turned on the speaker.

"Hello, Tofu Clinic, Dr. Tofu Ono speaking." Dr. Tofu greeted.

"Hey doc, it's me, Nabiki–I got you on speaker phone," Nabiki said preemptively.

"How can I help you?" Dr. Tofu asked.

"Is Ucchan there at the clinic?" Nabiki replied.

There was a pause before Dr. Tofu answered. "No, he's not. Should I expect him?"

Kaori went stiff. "… He was less than five minutes away from the clinic…"

"I'd say yes. Give me a call if he does show up," Nabiki asked.

"O-oh, okay, thank you for the heads up," Dr. Tofu politely answered, "Is there anything else?"

Nabiki turned off the speaker and brought the phone to her ear. "No, that'll be all doc. Bye."

As the middle Tendo sister ended the call, Kaori was trembling with anger. "No, no, no… that idiot…!"

Katie groaned. "I'll call Curly and see if they can spare some manpower." She turned to Akane. "Yo, Akaneko, looks like we're goin' to be big damn heroes again."

"Twice in one day?" Akane asked as she turned to grab up her bag. "I haven't even had my lunch!"

With that in consideration, Katie held out her hand. "Siddown and eat it, then."

Akane paused. "Eh?"

"Me an' Kaori are just gonna go round up Ucchan and drag him kicking and screaming over to Tofu's. He doesn't know where the bar is, so he'll probably just be off somewhere broodin' and biding his time to strike."

"Or thrashing the whole SAD to find the hideout by process of elimination," Nabiki noted. "I mean, he knows the hideout is here and not, say, outside the walls… right?"

Kaori went pale, and Katie, Akane, and Nabiki all turned to look at her.

"Kaori, hon, sugar pie… what did you do?" Katie asked, her tone increasingly pensive.

Daikoku Kaori didn't even try to save face. "I fucked up."

"… How?" Akane said, not liking the vindication in Nabiki's eyes.

Looking down at her feet, Kaori sighed and fessed. "… I told him their hideout was a gay bar."

Katie was horrified. "KAORI. THERE ARE ONLY THREE IN THE SAD."

"You might need to bring a bucket to take what's left of Ucchan to Tofu's, then," Nabiki suggested.

Akane forwent her lunch as she pointed at Nabiki. "You hush!" She turned to Katie and Kaori. "Senpai… let's go save this idiot."

Katie nodded in agreement. "Giddyup, then."

Kaori went right back to seething as the three girls took off. "I swear on my business license, Ucchan… if you are that stupid…!"

Watching the three young women hop the wall and depart, Nabiki shrugged her shoulders and looked at her phone. "I oughta bring Kodachi into the loop…"

"If you do not mind my intrusion," Mendō Shūtaro said, as he emerged from behind a tree, now that the girls he wasn't allowed to speak to were gone, "But I would like to know what's going on as well."

Nabiki looked up from her phone and at him. "No."

"If there's a price for information, I'm willing to pay," Mendō then offered.

Money was nice, but there was something with Mendō here she didn't trust. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'd rather not take your cash, Troublemaker. I'm on retainer with Kodachi."

Mendō knelt before her. "My intentions are noble and pure; I have pledged myself to Kodachi-sama and as you are her retainer, I serve you as well. I only wish to understand this crisis that I have stumbled upon. Who are these masked men, and what threat do they pose to this beautiful school?"

Nabiki huffed in amusement and got up. It was her idea anyway they keep this idiot around, so perhaps it was time to put him to good use. "Let's talk to Kodachi about it and see what she wants to do about keeping you informed."

Ikemen Teikoku, contrary to Kaori's description as a mere gay bar, was a much more sophisticated and discreet establishment. It was a place where men could come and be freed from the burdens of family, work, and society to be who they really were–all with the application of a mask. The plain white masks that were mandatory for all patrons to wear brought with them freedom from an oppressive and judgemental world, and the comfort that they were not alone in their anonymity.

Today, unfortunately, was not a pleasant day for business.

Deep within the recesses of the red brick building's most coveted and luxurious lounge, Kamaitachi lit a cigarette and leaned his elbow on the table beneath an extravagant but dimly powered chandelier that still had enough light to set the room glimmering around him. The booth around him was empty, though two of his men guarded the seats.

Across from him, all alone, was a seething Suzuki. His collar popped, his hair was mussed, and there was a fury burning in his eyes as he glowered at the leader of the Sickle Gang.

"What the hell was that?!" He demanded.

Kamaitachi blew out some smoke. "Defeat, that happens sometimes. That okonomiyaki chef and those Furinkan girls showed up at Butsumetsu after fucking Mendō Shūtaro showed up at Furinkan and sent all my guys running in fear. I haven't even heard back from them."

Suzuki scoffed. "An infant with no limbs could crush Mendō Shūtaro in a fight!"

Contrary to what Kawasaki Shinji said to his interrogators, Kamaitachi did not like Suzuki.

"Are you freaks that useless?!"

The young man in leather took another drag of his cigarette. "… What more do you want from me, Suzuki?"

Kamaitachi despised this young man.

"I want results!" Suzuki yelled. "I want anyone who could know about our agreement to go away! If you cannot do that, then what good are you?!"

Kamaitachi bowed his head, bludgeoned by the Host's angry words. Behind his cigarette he cursed his weakness before him–and his wanting inability to assert himself.

To this point, he had been accommodating, generous even, to this spoiled rotten coward.

There was a long drag on the cigarette which burned a little hotter, as if taking in some of Kamaitachi's frustration. "Are you saying you'd like to go back to trying to gain your street cred on your own?"

Suzuki snarled and slammed his fist on the table–painted with a handsome man striding atop a city skyline, bearing the flag with the crossed sickles of the Sickle Gang. In a circle around the man were many similarly drawn men, raising their fists in solidarity with the flag. Looking down at it, he sneered in disgust.

"I may as well, you're so worthless!" He spat on the center of the table. "Maybe playing grabass in the dark is what you should stick to!"

Kamaitachi trembled, and smoke jetted from his nostrils. "Please… at the very least…"

Suzuki, pulling back, stopped when he heard the quiet plea.

"Please… tell me where I can find it…" Removing the cigarette from his lips, Kamaitachi bowed his head low. "I have already done this much for you, so much for you. Taian is all but yours, they still fear your name and it will be your word against a couple of High School girls and delinquents not even fit to clean Yakuza toilets."

Kamaitachi hated bowing to this fool so much. But he could do nothing else, Suzuki was his only hope.

His only hope for bringing back the Madame.

Suzuki snorted. "Why? What are you going to do if I don't?"

A twitch shot through Kamaitachi.

Suzuki gestured to him. "That isn't to say I don't appreciate it–even with some of my best guys being under the weather right now, business has been booming. But your gang are a bunch of worthless freaks who can't even beat up 'a couple of high school girls and delinquents not even fit to clean Yakuza toilets.'"

He turned away. "I'm not telling you shit."

Taking two steps, he stopped when he heard hands tightening on weapons behind him. Suzuki's smirk grew twisted. "Eh…? You guys do remember I can go blow for blow with Sōban, right? Do you really want to add your blood to this joint's tacky decor?"

Seething, Kamaitachi got up. "… You…!"

A gentle, matronly voice called from the darkness.

"Kamaitachi… what are you doing?"

Kamaitachi dropped the sickle he drew, and gasped as his eyes grew wide. He, and the equally stunned Sickle Gang members guarding his booth looked towards the darkness the voice had drifted from.

Suzuki turned towards the voice as well, as footsteps sounded on the hard concrete floor. "… Who…?"

When he looked back at Kamaitachi, he could see in the dim light tears forming in the leather wearing man's eyes as he brought his trembling hands up towards his mouth like he was about to break down.

"… It can't be…" Kamaitachi murmured, his voice filled with hope.

From the darkness a man appeared, adorned in a royal purple kimono with gold trim on the sleeves. Over his shoulders he wore a white feather boa, and over his head and around his neck like a hood there was a light blue silk shawl. On his hands he wore red lace fingerless gloves, and over his face he wore a gold and black mask studded with jewels and bearing the crossed sickles insignia of the Sickle Gang at its center.

Suzuki looked over as the two Gang members guarding Kamaitachi abruptly fell to one knee. Springing over the table, Kamaitachi quickly fell to his knees before the man taking his right hand into both of his own.

"Please… please let it truly be you…!" The young man sputtered, practically weeping.

Suzuki was confused. "Uhh… who is this weirdo?" He stopped to appraise his look. "… Kinda diggin' his drip, tho."

"Dear Kamaitachi," the newcomer said in a soft playfully chiding tone, "Could there be anyone in this world… nnnnn… this beautiful?"

Kamaitachi felt his tears roll down his face as he shook his head. "No, M-Madame Kamenbell!"

Suzuki went rigid, as all the bravado and arrogance exploded from his body due to the sheer force of the terror racing through him. "… Did… did you just say…?!"

Letting out a wail, Kamaitachi held aloft Madame Kamenbell's hand before resting his forehead against the back of it. "Madaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame!"

"Why do you weep, my trusted subordinate?" Madame Kamenbell asked.

"I have done all I could… I've done everything you asked of me… but it's been so hard, I… I…!" Kamaitachi sobbed. "Please forgive me, all of the failures… they are mine alone!"

Madame Kamenbell chuckled. "Failure? For the first time, I saw my beloved men in the light of day, fearless of the sun, and they fought splendidly."

"But…!" Kamaitachi sputtered.

He smiled down on Kamaitachi. "Fate moves and weaves in wondrous ways… for my heart and soul had returned to this wretched world, even as you took such bold strides. Our reunion was destiny, my Kamaitachi… I am certain of it."

Kamaitachi looked back up at Madame Kamenbell in awe. His eyes then widened, as realization struck him. "… It is fate…"

He turned and pointed at Suzuki, who had been edging backwards towards the exit to the lounge. "Madame! This man knows where the Fox Temple is!"

It was Madame Kamenbell's turn to be taken aback, as he he looked up from Kamaitachi to Suzuki. "… Is this true, young man?"

Suzuki stopped moving as Madame Kamenbell slipped his hand from Kamaitachi's grasp and stepped towards him, reaching out to him melodramatically from ten paces. "… Is what I heard true… do you truly know of the Fox Temple…?"

Swallowing hard and blinking away the sweat pouring down his face from his eyes, Suzuki tried to shore up the swagger he had a minute ago. He had to get the air around him sparkling, to get himself dazzling. "So… you're Madame Kamenbell, right? The legendary leader of this gang? Heh… yeah… I might know a thing or two about a temple, but–"

Suzuki didn't see him move. One instant Madame Kamenbell was ten paces away, and in the next his hand was clamped like a bear's jaws around his throat as he was pressed up against the wall behind him off his feet. He could still barely breathe, but with only the slightest squeeze, he felt his world go hazy. "Geh… grgk?!"

"I trust you are truthful, my dear lovely young man," Madame Kamenbell said as he reached up and caressed Suzuki's ashen face with the knife edge of his free hand, dragging the sharpened nail of his pinky finger down his cheek. "There is such little beauty in this wretched world… and it would be a waste to lose more…"

Suzuki gurgled, to terrified to form words even as Madame Kamenbell granted him the ability to with a slightly slackened grip.

Madame Kamenbell slightly shook his head, and then abruptly swung his hand away from Suzuki's face to deflect a projectile thrown at the side of his with a dramatic flair.

Kamaitachi jumped to his feet in alarm when he saw the projectile embedded in the ceiling–a single spatula.

"My, my… what have we…?" Madame Kamenbell turned his head to look and trailed off when he saw Ucchan standing at the exit to the lounge, hand gripping his holstered oversized spatula. "… The beautiful chef…"

Ucchan chuckled. "Imagine my luck, finding this place on my first try. That's better for me, I don't wanna make an enemy of all the dude bars in Taian."

He looked at Suzuki and made a face. "You just couldn't keep in your pants, could you? Had to make one last hail mary, huh?"

Suzuki, his eyes filled with fear, looked at Ucchan and he began to gurgle as he shook his head. "… R-ru…"

Ucchan ignored him and turned his attention back to Madame Kamenbell. "Seeing as you're the best dressed peacock here, you're the guy in charge–right?"

"I'm flattered you would describe me so beautifully," Madame Kamenbell replied.

Ucchan snorted. "That wasn't a compliment. Your fit is goofy there, sugar."

He drew the spatula from his back and pointed it at him. "When I'm done wiping you and your gang out, I can offer you some tips to freshen your look. Maybe something with a little more humility, huh?!"

Madame Kamenbell let out a theatrical sigh. "Humility is for pathetic, colorless birds who serve no purpose but one:"

He vanished from where he stood.

Ucchan's eyes widened. "He disappe–"

Blinding pain whited out all of Ucchan's senses, as the pain of a deep cutting wound down his back blanked everything else out. Madame Kamenbell had gotten behind him in an instant and slashed across his back with the blade of an ornate black and gold scythe bearing a red tassel on the scythe end and a pointed spear tip at the base.

"To be eaten," Madame Kamenbell finished.

Unable to even utter a word, Ucchan collapsed to the ground unconscious.

Suzuki, still frozen in terror, watched as Madame Kamenbell–now splattered with Ucchan's blood, turned and looked down at the wounded chef's back. Bringing his free hand to his mouth, he gasped in realization. "I see… another broken bird, trying to become beautiful."

Kamaitachi grew surprised at his master's words, then scowled at Ucchan. "What do we do with him?"

"We will be taking him with us, and the other fetching young man as well," Madame Kamenbell said, "If he has found us, then others will be along shortly. There is much to do, and I would like to see it done with as little interference as possible."

Kamaitachi grimaced. "Damn it…"

Madame Kamenbell abruptly appeared before Kamaitachi and cupped his cheek. "My Kamaitachi… fear not. This withdrawal is necessary, but we are now one step closer to a beautiful world… and it is all thanks to you."

Heartened, Kamaitachi nodded, then went over to take Suzuki by his arm and haul him to his feet. "Get up you piece of shit."

Suzuki yelped and tried to pull away. "No, I'm not–!"

A hard punch across his face stopped him, and Kamaitachi looked down at him with the same sadistic sneer he had only a few minutes prior. "You have no say in the matter, pretty boy. In fact, if you want this to go any better for you, then you should collect your thoughts and tell us everything we want to know."

I waited so long for this. The next chapter will be massive. It will also be the end of the line for a certain character...