KS: Well, folks, we made it. 2021 is here, and already the world is going through all kinds of madness. This is what I believe is why fanfiction exists: we can make fanmade stories based off of our favorite series to make others happy and ease the stress for them. However, you should know that I have never done a mystery story before, as this is a new frontier on my part. Enjoy.

Bell and Ash walked down the street, feeling happy after a successful dungeon crawl.

"Man, did we make a killing," Ash said with the biggest grin he could muster. "200,000 valis in one go. We're gonna be eating good tonight, partner."

"Indeed we will," Bell replied. "No doubt the goddess will be happy to hear about our exploits."

The two finally made their way to a derelict church near a dead end street. They walked inside and past numerous pots, flasks and vials containing various liquids or body parts of monsters.

"No girl is going to want to come to this place with all this junk lying around," Ash snarked.

"This 'junk' that you speak of is what I need in order work," Bell shot back. "Also, I'd like see anyone try to throw my equipment out."

Ash chuckled. "Yeah, that would be a funny thing to see."

Bell opened the door and he and Ash walked down the stairs until they reached a room. There, Hestia was sitting on the bed, along with an unfamiliar woman.

"Bell, Ash, you're back," Hestia said happily.

"Yep, we're back," Ash said with a huge grin. "And we're alive and kicking and rolling in riches."

"It's only 200,000 valis," Bell sighed as he sat down next to Hestia. "I wouldn't exactly consider it 'rolling in riches'." He looked at the woman sitting in front of him. "You must be a new client."

"Obviously I'm a client," the woman replied rudely. "Why the hell else would I be here?"

"Well, you're a real charmer," Bell deadpanned. "All the men must swoon when they see you."

"I'd fry them before they'd get the opportunity," the woman shot back. "Now are you going to take my case or not?"

"That depends," Bell said. "Who do I have the pleasure of speaking with?"

The woman sighed. "One of those polite types, huh? Fine, I'll play ball. My name is Kokonoe Mercury. I'm from the Izanami Familia, if that rings a bell. No pun intended."

"Wasn't aware there was a pun," Bell replied.

"Hey, now that you mentioned it, that does sound familiar," Ash said. "We were tracking down a guy who swindled one of the members and got him to pay up."

"I seem to recall you beating the snot out of him in the process," Hestia said with a pointed gaze.

Ash shrugged. "The bastard was all smug and his face was punchable. Sue me."

"Never mind all of that," Bell interrupted. "Now, Kokonoe. Tell us why you came here."

Kokonoe sighed as she took off her glasses and wiped them with a tissue. "It's this… colleague of mine. She received from threats from an anonymous person."

Bell's interest was piqued. "Threats? Were they death threats?"

"Some were," Kokonoe answered. "Others were just a demand to get out of Orario or else something bad would happen."

"Do you have any proof of these threats?" Ash asked.

Kokonoe took out a slip of paper and handed it to Bell. He took it and read what was written.

GET THE F*** OUT OF ORARIO

Ash and Hestia looked at the paper as well.

"At least the writer had the courtesy to censor their curses," Hestia said.

"Perhaps they wanted to curse properly, but wussed out at the last second," Ash joked.

"Whether or not they wanted to curse is irrelevant," Bell said. "Whoever sent these threats intend to do harm to Kokonoe's colleague."

"Her name is Litchi Faye-Ling."

Everyone turned towards Kokonoe.

"She's a member of the Miach Familia. At least, she's one of the few who chose to stay with the poor bastard. She runs a clinic next to his place and helps him make ends meet."

"I remember Miach talking about a skilled physician," Hestia said with a smile. "He had nothing but nice things to say about her."

Kokonoe snorted derisively. "If you ask me, her kind nature is a weakness for her. In this life, having a heart of gold is liable to get you in trouble. These threats she's received are proof of that."

"But that makes no sense," Ash interjected. "Why would a woman who's done no wrong by anyone start getting threats?"

"That's what we're going to find out," Bell said, putting the paper in the pocket. "Kokonoe, we'll take your case."

"Good to know," Kokonoe said, putting a lollipop in her mouth. "Let me know when you've figured out who's sending the threats."

The trio was put off by her nonchalant demeanor. It was almost as if she didn't care what happened to her colleague. Regardless, they received a case and they were going to solve it.

"We'll start by going to the clinic where Litchi works," Bell said, going up the stairs.

"Why the clinic?" Ash asked, following him.

"Because it's the most likely location the perpetrator has struck first," Bell replied. "Also, the Themis Familia should be there investigating right now."

Ash groaned. "Man, I hope we don't run into Minerva. She's got more than a few sticks up her-"

"Ash! Don't speak that way about a lady."

"Minerva ain't no lady, bud. She's a tyrant."

As the voices faded, Hestia turned towards Kokonoe, who was still sucking her lollipop.

"How did someone as rude as you become a colleague to a nice woman like Litchi?" she asked.

Kokonoe shrugged. "Damned if I know."

Litchi's clinic once had a welcoming environment to everyone who passed by. Whether they had an injury or ailment, she was the one who could help them out and send them off with a smile.

Now, it's the scene of a crime, littered with broken windows and obscene insults painted on the walls. A group of people were seen investigating the building, while others cordoned off the area around it to prevent outsiders from getting too close.

"I'm tellin' you, this has to be that cat girl she's arguing with," a young man with dark blue hair and dark eyes said. His attire composed of a brown jacket over a black sweater, a red and white shawl around his neck fingerless gloves, gray pants and black boots. On his back was a large broadsword in its sheath.

Raz

Themis Familia, Level 4

"Raz, don't speak anymore. Everytime you open your mouth, this city gets a lot more dumb than it has to be."

The tired response came from a woman with long black hair and gray eyes. She wore a tight red tunic covered by a white cloak, blue pants and white shoes. She had a bow on her back, but no quiver for arrows, and two wrist-mounted crossbows.

Kai Schulen

Themis Familia, Level 4

"Ugh… everyday it's like this," a young girl with blonde hair sighed. She wore a blue tunic with armor plated on her shoulders, forearms and chest, black plants with kneepads and black boots. On her belt were spheres that had various symbols on them.

Riley Miller

Themis Familia, Level 3

"Is it possible for you two to not be at each other's throats when we're on the clock?"

Kai gestured to Raz. "Tell that to him. He's not able to not talk out of his ass for at least an hour."

"I'm not talking out of my ass!" Raz shot back. "I just have a gut feeling that the cat girl set this up to get back at her for whatever beef they had in the past."

"And yet, you've offered no evidence to support this gut feeling of yours," Kai deadpanned.

Riley put her hand to her forehead and sighed. "Which of the gods did I piss off to get stuck with you two?"

Raz turned to the left and saw two familiar people approach them. "Probably Hestia."

"What do you mean?" Kai asked.

Raz pointed towards where he was looking and Riley and Kai turned towards where he was pointing. They saw Bell and Ash walking towards them.

"Oh, it's them," Riley said with a grin. "It's nice to see them every now and again."

"If that were true, they wouldn't be constantly showing up when we're working," Raz sighed. "Seriously, a pair of adventurers moonlighting as private detectives? Who the hell came up with that?"

Kai elbowed him. "Don't be like that. We had a lot of hard cases that we couldn't solve in the past. If it weren't for those two, we'd still be going around in circles."

"I'd rather be in circles than out of work," Raz muttered.

Bell and Ash finally approached the trio.

"Greetings, everyone," Bell said. "May we come in?"

Raz scoffed. "Not like anyone's stopping ya."

Kai elbowed him again. "Don't be rude, Raz."

"Hey, this is as polite as I can get," Raz shot back.

Riley ignored the two and lifted the tape up. "Don't mind them. Come right in."

"Ah, if only the girls in this city were as sweet and polite as you," Ash said as he walked under the tape. "And I'm talking about genuine sweetness, not like that cheap façade like you would see with the Ishtar Familia."

"How would you know how women working in brothels have fake kindness?" Bell asked as he followed his companion.

"I once visited a brothel in my hometown from time to time," Ash answered. "Not for the reasons you think, though. I just go there to talk to an old family friend. Since then, I've had a knack for knowing if people are genuine or not."

Bell smiled. "And I'm grateful for that skill. Even though I have it myself."

Ash playfully hit Bell in his back. "Shut up, man."

Riley, Raz and Kai watched as the two entered the clinic.

"Those bastards should count themselves lucky that Minerva isn't around," Raz grumbled.

"I'd say you're even luckier than she's not around," Kai remarked sharply. "Unless you've forgotten that time she lectured you in front of the precinct for getting into a drunken fight with one of the members of the Loki Familia."

Raz flinched and clenched his teeth, unable come up with a retort.

"Every single time with those two," Riley sighed again.

More members of the Themis Familia were inside of the clinic, inspecting the interior. A lot of the furniture was damaged and the walls were covered with obscene writing, just like the exterior.

"Whoever did this must have a sick sense of humor," one of them said.

"I don't know what's so humorous about vandalism," another replied. "Especially with threats containing vulgar language."

Bell and Ash walk into the room, catching their attention.

"Aw, wonderful. The freaks have arrived."

"You say something, prick?" Ash said, cracking his knuckles.

The officer would have said something, but a new voice prevented him from doing so.

"Let's not do this again. Allow these two to assist us with the investigation."

Everyone turned towards the speaker, who was a young man with black hair and gray eyes, wearing a brown jacket with armor plating shown on his chest and forearms, along with black pants with armor on the legs.

Claude Wallace

Themis Familia, Level 5

"Good to see you again, Claude," Bell said with a smile.

Claude sighed. "Bell, how many times have I told you to call me 'Inspector' when I'm on the clock?"

"Hey, we can speak casually, man," Ash interjected. "Besides, Minerva's not here right now."

"Both of you should be grateful that she isn't," Claude replied. "She's been breathing down my neck about letting outsiders assist us with certain cases. Even if they're good at it."

Bell waved off the remark. "That's irrelevant. Tell us what we need to know."

Claude sighed once more. "We already investigated the area. At first, we thought it was a burglary, but none of the victims' belongs have been stolen."

"Vandalism, then," Ash said. "That would explain the writing outside."

Bell looked around the room to see anything out of the ordinary. Apart from torn books and broken glass, he saw a set of wet footprints on the carpet, all bundled together.

WET FOOTPRINTS

"Whoever was responsible for this walked around a lot," Bell said. "There are a lot of footprints focused on this particular area."

"Yeah, and the fact that they're wet shows that these guys are a bunch of amateurs," Ash commented.

Bell looked towards the wall and saw a rather odd set of words scrawled in red paint.

"What the hell is that?"

Ash and Claude looked towards where Bell was looking and saw the text.

AILSUN HET NIX

"Yeah, what the hell is that?" Ash asked.

"We don't know ourselves," Claude replied. "These words were left by the intruders as well."

"But why, though?" Ash asked.

"Come on, Ash. This is the whole reason why we're detectives."

Ash turned towards Bell, who was still staring at the words.

"Bell?"

(Sherlock OST: The Game Is On)

His colleague turned around, showing a wide grin that showed all of his teeth.

"If we couldn't figure this out, we'd have to fall back on being adventurers."

Bell's grin was certainly infectious, as Ash was showing one of his own.

"Then I guess we're gonna crack this case wide open, huh?"

"Hell yeah!" Bell cheered, high-fiving Ash. "Let's head back to the church and gather what we know."

Both of them rushed out the room, leaving Claude and the officers standing in shock. Shortly after, Riley, Raz and Kai walked.

"Why did those two bozos fly out of here with the dumbest grins I've ever seen?" Raz asked, earning another elbow jab to the ribs from Kai.

"Who knows what they're thinking?" Claude replied with a sighed. "Either way, we're in for trouble when Minerva gets word of this."

Everyone in the room let out a collective sigh, knowing that they were in a lot of trouble.

KS: You're not imagining things here, folks. I added characters from Valkyria Chronicles 4 in this fic for my own reasons. Why? Because my creative muse demanded it. Anyway, the boys have got their first case. Who is behind the vandalism and why? You'll find out soon enough.