Hello everyone! I apologize for the long wait between the previous chapter and this one. Work and life in general has given me little time to write, so thank you all for being so patient! We're almost finished with the Phantom Menace arc, which will lead into the story between Episode I and II. As always, thank you to julesley for being an amazing editor and much thanks to those who've supported the story thus far. You're the real MVP.
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars.
"The invasion is over! Queen Amidala and many brave fighters have taken back control of our beloved planet! Further details shall follow, please remain in your homes and safe houses until further notice."
- Breaking news bulletin, courtesy of Mali Nightbreak
I thought I understood the concept of a hollow victory after I won a candy-eating competition at school and then was sick for the rest of the day. Winning the grudging respect of my classmates didn't comfort me while I suffered the worst stomachache I've ever had.
Despite that seemingly harrowing experience, I wasn't prepared for the aftermath of our plan; the metaphorical and literal dust settling. Even though we won and a new treaty was signed, I couldn't rest until my multiple attempts at comming Green Group eventually led me to the medbay. Hearing a torrent of curse words in a Kaadarian accent brings me more relief than it should have.
Seeing my sister arguing with a nurse about the healing properties of kolto versus bacta ("Kolto is a natural substance that accelerates the healing rate of skin tissue, unlike bacta that's grown in a lab under a microscope, what part of that do you not kriffing understand!?") is enough to bring tears to my eyes. I swallow once before clearing my throat.
"Pardon me," the nurse and Halleth stop arguing, turning their heads to me. The former takes stock of my Handmaiden robes and nods, while the latter seems to shrink in her cot, her hands fiddling with the sheets over her legs. "I would like to speak with this girl before her head explodes from all that knowledge she likes to whiplash people with."
"Oy!" Halleth snaps at me while the nurse moves away. I take a seat on the edge of her cot, noting the way her left arm is wrapped in bandages and the stitched wound that travels from her hairline down to her left ear, nearly missing her eye. "If you're here to make me feel better, you should've brought food, or a datapad. How am I supposed to keep up with what's going on if they completely cut me off from the outside world?"
"They probably want you to rest, Howl-eth."
She shakes her head, paling slightly. "Don't talk to me about rest. How am I supposed to sleep after─" My heart pangs in my chest when her words fall short, ending on a choked sound; I can count on one hand how many times I've seen Halleth cry. (Excluding her time as a baby, which I'd assume is a given.) "Have you heard from Mom and Dad?"
The sudden change of subject speaks louder than any words she might say. "Traffic into Theed is being monitored closely but they should be here tonight."
Halleth meets my eyes, scrutinizing me in that sisterly-way she'd mastered a long time ago. She and Eirtaé could teach a class on 'Reading-Sabé-Like-A-Book.' "What's wrong?"
A surprised laugh escapes me. "You're the one lying in a medbay yet you're asking me what's wrong? Isn't that a little backwards?"
"You're deflecting." I open my mouth to retort before she rather rudely interrupts me. "You're five seconds away from mentioning that you're hungry, probably something about biscuits." My mouth closes, teeth clicking together. Well, then. "What happened?"
A lump rises in my throat. She watches me silently until I can manage a few, coherent words. "We defeated the Trade Federation. That's what happened."
Her hand, the uninjured one, wraps over mine. It's as if we have a mutual understanding that if we speak of what happened during the battle, it makes it more real; set in permacrete, and forever etched in our minds.
Knowing my sister survived is a victory; knowing that the Trade Federation was defeated is another victory; I should be celebrating. I should be laughing and dancing. I should be eating my weight in biscuits.
But all I can think about is the fact that Qui-Gon Jinn didn't survive his encounter with Darth Maul.
From SVRHMatRNSF to meangreenmachineataverna 1707 GST
Subject: [Encoded 98568] Honestly, Halleth...
If you and Saché don't stop terrorizing your nurses ─ who are trying to HELP you both recover, by the way ─ I am marching down to the medbay myself and you won't like what I have to say.
XOXO SV
P.S. Don't underestimate me. I'm armed with cleaning supplies and I'm not afraid to use them.
From meangreenmachineataverna to SVRHMatRNSF 1708 GST
Subject:RE[Encoded 98568] Honestly, Halleth...
Ooo, we're SO scared. What are you going to do? Scrub us to death? Dust us off?
If you do come by, can you bring us some food? Saché tried to talk her pilot friend into bringing us something but his shift won't be over for another hour.
XOXO HA
P.S. But really… we're starving.
From meangreenmachineataverna to SVRHMatRNSF 1709 GST
Subject:RE[Encoded 98568] Honestly, Halleth…
WAIT… Saché has a pilot friend!?
XOXO SV
From meangreenmachineataverna to SVRHMatRNSF 1711 GST
Subject:RE[Encoded 98568] Honestly, Halleth…
I guess you'll have to bring us some food, and then you'll find out…
XOXO HA
- Message thread between Royal Handmaiden Sabé Vena and civilian contact Halleth Averna
There are some who preach the wonders of healthy coping mechanisms and I applaud their ability to use them. However, in times like these, I've found that the best thing to do is to keep myself busy.
Power couplings need to be worked on? Sure! I'll pass you the hydrospanner. The Queen needs to be at a meeting in five minutes? You bet I'll have her there in three, even if I'm braiding her hair as we run from one end of the Palace to another. There's a crack in the floor that needs caulking? Show me how to do it and I will ultimately make the situation worse and walk away in defeat.
But let's not dwell on that last one.
Also, I've found that being surrounded by reckless, foolhardy women is another way to keep myself and my thoughts occupied thanks to Halleth and Saché both ending up in the medbay. As you can imagine, they're both lovely, cooperative patients.
"Sabé?" I look up from the spot in the carpet I've been cleaning, to see Eirtaé and Yané standing over me.
"Oh! Hey! Have you ever noticed this stain in our chambers? It's been bothering me ever since we moved in and I've almost got it removed, so please try not to step on it─"
They share a look, amidst my continued babbling and reach down to take my arms and haul me upwards. I sway a little on my feet at the sudden change of height and scowl. "Kriff, maybe warn a girl before you do that?"
"Do you realize what time it is?" Eirtaé asks, crossing her arms. I look at my feet as if they're the most interesting thing in the room.
"You know, time flies when you're having fun and all that…"
"It's 1500 hours," Yané interjects, pointing to the chrono on the wall. "The ceremony is in three hours and we have to get ourselves and the Queen ready. Saché is already angry enough that she's too injured to make it to the funeral pyre and she will murder you slowly if she discovers you missed it because you're too busy cleaning carpets."
My heart stutters once as I think about the upcoming ceremony for Master Jinn. The Jedi and various representatives from the Republic arrived in Theed this morning, including Palpatine-the-Awful, and I've only seen Obi-Wan once in passing since the battle's end.
I couldn't look him in the eyes.
"I'm almost done with this stain, I promise. It won't take me long to get ready and─oh, would you stop doing that!?" I struggle as Eirtaé and Yané grab my arms and drag me to the refresher. They ignore my cursing and attempts to dig in my heels until I find myself face-to-face with the tiled walls of the hydro-shower.
These grout lines are disgraceful. I need to clean them next.
"Shower off, make yourself presentable, and meet us in Padmé's chambers in thirty minutes." Eirtaé's tone allows for no argument and Yané shoves a loofah in my face.
"Don't worry," she states as I eye the fluffy, pink object questioningly. "It's a brand new one and completely free of germs and contaminants. Don't forget to scrub behind your ears."
I squawk as Eirtaé forcefully closes the curtain, leaving me in a state of confusion while the loofah slips from my fingers. Cursing under my breath, I throw my clothes out and turn the water as hot as the controls allow. Even though it feels as if my skin is scalding, it helps me focus on something other than the sadness and shame roiling inside.
What is the point of knowing the future if I can't stop it? Why did I have to be reborn here only to watch the same events play out? Does the Force have some cruel sense of humor? The expression on Obi-Wan's face the last time I saw him was so…
A hand slaps against the wall beside the shower, making me scream in fright. "What the kark is wrong with you!?"
"You have ten minutes. Hurry up, Averna!" Eirtaé's voice carries over the showering water and I shove my arm out from behind the curtain, waving one finger at her. She merely scoffs. "How very mature…"
Two minutes later, I'm towel drying my hair while brushing my teeth with my other free hand. Rabé is perched at the mirror to my right, expertly twisting her hair into a bun while looking at me. I spit out my toothpaste and then pause under her scrutiny.
"… May I help you?"
"You know I'm here if you ever need to talk, right?"
I force a bright smile on my face. "Of course!" In the midst of our conversation, I notice a spot on the lower right section of the mirror. I need to clean that as well. "Did you get any sleep last night?"
"Yes," I breathe a sigh of relief as Rabé accepts the subject change. That girl has always loved the idea of sleep. "There's nothing like being in your own bed."
I agree half-heartedly, since all I did was stare at the ceiling last night. To say I had an hour of sleep would be generous.
All I could see when I closed my eyes was the encounter I had with Obi-Wan. I couldn't get away from Padmé long enough to run down to the Generator Complex right after the battle, and when our paths finally crossed it was in the midst of the transportation of Qui-Gon's body to the morgue. I'd nearly dropped the datapads I was carrying when I saw his body in the hover-pod. He'd been laid out with dignity, his hands crossed over the wound in his midsection that ultimately killed him.
I'm not sure if what I said to Obi-Wan was coherent, something along the lines of, "Oh kriff, I'm so─I'll get out of your way now, I'm-so-sorry," before I ran off like a complete coward.
Even though Obi-Wan's neutral mask was firmly in place, I knew he was suffering. He also seemed to be favoring his right foot, which meant that he was injured. Any warnings I tried to give Qui-Gon only made things worse. I don't remember Obi-Wan being physically harmed in the movie.
The guilt has been weighing me down ever since then.
"─and I even missed Yané's sleep-talking, can you imagine that? I still don't understand what her strange fear of noodles is, but I don't think it's my place to ask." I shake my head as if it'll make the memories go away and smile at Rabé.
"You know, she's never mentioned any strange, horrific noodle-related catastrophes to us. Maybe the irrational fear is so deep in her subconscious she isn't even aware of it? Maybe she was forced to wear a noodle hat as a child?"
"I heard that!" Yané walks in, her mouth turned downwards. "I'll have you know that noodles are a potential choking hazard to many small children and certain alien species that lack esophageal organs. The number of noodle-related deaths is far too high for my liking. Studies show that any nutritional properties that can be found are non-substantive and don't support a healthy diet."
Rabé and I share a look as she continues her noodle-related diatribe.
I can always count on Yané for her positivity.
The ceremony for Qui-Gon was exactly what I suspected it would be, yet somehow, ten times worse. I don't remember when I grabbed Eirtaé and Rabé's hands, but before the funeral pyre finished burning out, all of the Handmaidens could be found linked together.
I even dared a glance at Anakin and Obi-Wan, seeing the latter promise to train the former in the Jedi arts. I looked away when Obi-Wan's eyes met mine and allowed the tears to slip freely, thankful for the covering of my hood. My stomach churned with a mixture of sorrow, anger, and disappointment that things weren't different.
Anger won out when I looked in Palpatine's direction. Have I mentioned that I hate that man?
After we returned to our chambers and led an exhausted Padmé to bed, I stared at the ceiling for hours. As the moonbeams traveled over my head I decided that I needed to occupy my time once more. Glancing around the room, I realized that if I wake up the other Lead and Palace Handmaidens with cleaning, they may have my head. So I came to the decision that only one place could bring the solace I so desperately need.
Quietly, I sneak down the halls to one of my favorite places in the Palace. When I reach the warm, sandstone floors of the kitchen I am surprised to see a small, blonde-haired boy sitting at the counter. He stares at his hands until my soft inhale of surprise alerts him to my presence.
"Oh… hey Sabé." His voice is hoarse, leading me to suspect that he's been crying. He wipes his nose with his sleeve.
"Hey Anakin… trouble sleeping?"
"The beds are too soft," He replies, watching me open the conservator and dig around the shelves until I find what I'm looking for. I grab a jar of shuura fruit jam and a plate of biscuits that clearly have my name written on them.
"Want some?" I ask as I slide the plate over to him and he gladly accepts it. We eat our food in companionable silence until I spot the datapad resting beside him. "So, if you can't sleep, what have you been doing down here all alone?"
Anakin slumps further, resting his elbows on the table. "Obi-Wan─no, wait, Master Obi-Wan, I'm still not used to that─said I could read about the Jedi before my training begins, if I wanted. But…"
"Buuuuuut?" I ask, a grin sliding on my face as Anakin squirms. "You were reading about something else?"
"Did you know that there are three major podraces on Malastare, Ando Prime, and Aleen? The tech they use is so wizard compared to what we had on Tatooine."
"Speaking of which," I take another bite of my biscuit. "We watched the race from the ship, how did you learn to fly like that?"
"Because I'm the best pilot in the galaxy, that's how!" I choke on my biscuit as Anakin puffs his chest out and grins. Once my throat clears, I can't help but grin back at him.
"Well, if you're the best pilot in the galaxy, you're looking at the worst one."
He raises an eyebrow. "Come on, you can't be that bad."
"Oh, I am. You know the gear shift on Koro-2 speeders? The one's that are supposed to be indestructible?"
"Yeah?"
"I snapped it in half when I tried to downshift into reverse." I was also terrified because it was raining and I couldn't get the wipers to work properly, but I don't think he needs to know that. Anakin's eyes widen owlishly.
"Whoa… maybe you are that bad."
"Hey! You didn't have to agree so quickly!" He ducks the wadded napkin I throw at him and emerges with a bright grin.
"You shouldn't have done that, Sabé." He grabs what's left of his biscuit and tosses it at me. I sidestep and the food sails harmlessly past me. I narrow my eyes at him in challenge.
"Oh, it is on!"
We launch ourselves to opposite sides of the kitchen, each grabbing supplies and food to use as ammunition. My hand reaches inside a jar of berries underneath the bar and I launch the fruit into the air. Anakin yelps as the food pelts him on top of the head.
"That's so unfair!" He flings shuura fruit jam in my direction and I squawk when it smacks me on the side of my face. He has surprisingly good aim for a nine-year-old.
"Anakin Whatever-Your-Middle-Name-Is Skywalker! You will pay for that!"
The fight continues and the kitchen shows signs of our heated warfare. By the time I run out of wadded napkins to throw at him and he uses his final supply of sliced butter, the walls and floor are covered with various and sundry splatters. A muja fruit pod, in an excellent display of rebellion against gravity, sticks to the ceiling above us.
"What is going on in here?" Anakin and I freeze mid-throw as Obi-Wan stands just inside the kitchen, arms folded. I am suddenly aware of the jam stuck to my face and the butter in my hair. He raises an eyebrow as his mouth twitches.
"She started it!" Anakin points at me, throwing me under the metaphorical airbus.
"He insulted my flying!"
"You told me you're the worst pilot in the galaxy yourself!"
"You were reading about podracing when you should've been studying the Jedi Code or some other facet of your training!"
Our argument stops as the fruit pod above us descends from the ceiling, landing on top of Obi-Wan's head with a decisive smack. My jaw drops as it slides down his hair and meets its final resting place in a dejected heap on the floor.
The three of us stare at the kamikaze fruit before a snort escapes me. I cover my mouth and drop to my knees, howling with laughter as Anakin joins in with me. Obi-Wan shakes his head at us.
"It's not funny."
I point at him, tears streaming down my red face. "No, it's hilarious." Anakin rolls on the ground to my right. Obi-Wan maintains a valiant effort of composure, until I wheeze out another laugh and he cracks. He tilts his head back and laughs, which fuels our hysterics even further.
By the time we manage to settle down, my midsection hurts and my lungs scream at me due to oxygen deprivation. I bring myself to stand on wobbly knees, grinning wider than a Hutt spotting a quick money scheme.
"Oh man," I look around the kitchen and sigh. "This is going to be fun to clean up."
"We'll help you," Obi-Wan says, earning a wide-eyed stare from Anakin.
"Wait, really?"
"Yes, my young Padawan, let this be your first lesson in choosing your battles wisely."
As Anakin grumbles his disagreement, I point to the hallway. "There are cleaning droids in the supply closet down the hall. They'll make it easier if you go and activate them."
Anakin is out of the kitchen quicker than a blaster bolt, leaving us chuckling at his quick departure.
"You're going to have your hands full with him," I state, finding rags for the both of us and wiping down the surfaces around me.
"I suspected as much," The amusement in his voice is clear. "Especially if he's around any mischievous influences."
"I know you're not implying that I'm mischievous."
"Would I say such a thing?"
"You know, they may call you the Negotiator but I think your diplomatic skills need work."
He pauses mid-swipe. "Believe it or not, no one has called me a negotiator of any sort."
I freeze, mind whirling at what I'd just said. Kriff. He doesn't earn that title until the Clone Wars begin. Why did I even say anything?
"Well… it just seems like a title you'd be given."
"So you're saying that my diplomatic skills are worth noting by others even if you hold them in contempt?"
I cross my eyes at him, which earns a chuckle. "It's too early for this."
"Says the woman that started a food fight with a nine-year-old."
"Says the man who's about to be backhanded with a cleaning rag."
He matches my glare mockingly, which breaks through my aggravation more quickly than it should have. Our bickering quiets down as I begin scrubbing a spot on the floor. If Anakin doesn't hurry up with those droids, we're going to be here a while.
The words that have been bubbling up inside me fall out of my mouth before I can stop them. "I'm sorry about Master Jinn. I know you two had to have been close."
Obi-Wan halts, turning to look at me with a polite, neutral expression; all traces of his mirth are gone. "It's not your fault, Sabé."
Somehow, his words are like a balm to my guilt-ridden heart. I continue scrubbing at the spot in front of me with vigor.
"However," he continues and I pause and look over my shoulder at him. "If you plan at firing at a Sith I'm about to do battle with, try to give me a warning next time."
My face turns red when I think about my impulsive shot at Darth Maul's face. It seemed like a good idea at the time. "For your sake and mine, let's hope that situation won't happen again."
Before he responds, Anakin marches in with a small army of cleaning droids in tow. "I found them! One of them has a faulty compressor and I had to fix it if these floors are ever going to get clean."
Twenty minutes later, the kitchen is spotless and the droids return to their charging stations in the supply closet. Anakin stretches his arms above his head and yawns.
"I think it is time for a shower and sleep." Obi-Wan places his hand on Anakin's shoulder and guides him out of the kitchen. "Good night, Sabé."
"G'night, Sabé," Anakin yawns again, waving lazily at me.
"Sleep well." I smile as they depart, feeling my exhaustion catch up to me as my jaw cracks with a yawn. My eyes narrow on the datapad that miraculously escaped the food fight unharmed. Once again, my maturity displays itself by way of unlocking the camera and leaving a series of hideous pictures of myself on the photo bank.
I'm particularly proud of the shot that displays my ability to grow three chins and the perfect angle of my nostrils.
Footsteps patter towards the kitchen and I set the datapad down innocently. Anakin hurries in and grabs it with a sigh of relief. "Phew! I can't believe I almost forgot Obi-Wa─Master Obi-Wan's datapad."
My eyes widen in horror. "Wait, did you say that's Obi-Wan's─"
"Good night Sabé!"
I stare blankly ahead as I'm left behind in the kitchen once more. I just left some of the most hideous pictures of myself on Obi-Wan's datapad. Kriff.
I wonder if Yané's slicing skills extend to personal tech.
To Mari: At least two story arcs, maybe more! I may write some chapters from the perspective of other characters, too! Sabé certainly has tried to be helpful, bless her heart. Can you imagine Sabé encountering Darth Maul again? That would be INTERESTING. Thank you, again, for your kind review!
Does anyone else relate to burying their emotions in work or starting food fights? Asking for a friend. Thank you for reading and please feel free to leave a review! I may even be willing to hint about the next story arc, if you ask nicely!