I have done a ton of research about the causes and effects of PTSD. However, if anything I write is in any way inaccurate, please PM me. I will fix it. I want an accurate portrayal, and if it seems too cheesy/fake/staged let me know. It's an issue I want to bring attention to, not capitalize off of. TW: mentions and reactions to trauma. Nothing specific or extreme.
Chapter 11: At Least the Mountains are Pretty
Alex:
Alex hears a scream from upstairs and jumps up from the couch. It was one of terror, something he was not unfamiliar with. He races into Jack's bedroom to check on Ella. Pressing his ear up to her bathroom door, all he can hear is the shower water pounding at the ground.
"Ella?" he calls out, not wanting to just barge in on her showering. He doesn't get a response, so he waits a couple seconds before calling her again. Still nothing. Sighing, he snatches a key from a shelf in Jack's room and unlocks the bathroom door. Opening it slowly, he calls out for his mission partner again. Alex really didn't want to see Ella in the shower. He didn't even want her in his home. What Alex wanted were a goodnight's sleep and a new career. However, the universe was never kind to what Alex wanted, so he took a deep breath and opened the door.
Ella was in a ball in the shower, water pouring over her body. Her knees were pulled up to her chest, her eyes were shut, and her head was in her hands. Alex's mind began racing. Ella didn't appear to have fallen, which was his first assumption when he'd heard the scream. Sighing, he quickly opened the shower and turned off the water. In all the fantasies he'd had about seeing naked girls in his shower, this one had somehow never made the list.
Her eyes open immediately, sensing the change of environment. "You alright?" Alex asks, his voice filled with concern. All he got in response was a shallow exhale and the slightest of head shakes. Alex still wasn't sure what one was expected to do when a pretty girl his age that he just met was clothless and frozen in his shower. He paused for a moment before grabbing Jack's bathrobe from the bar behind him. Jack being Jack, it was tie-dyed a rainbow of colors and he couldn't help but smile. Similar to her bathrobe, Jack had always been the light of his life.
He crouched down, bathrobe in his arms, planning on wrapping her cold, trembling body in it to warm her up. However, because he was so close to her, he was distracted by her body.
Seemingly hundreds of scars littered her right arm and leg. Was that a bullet wound in her shoulder? Her collection of injuries rivaled, if not surpassed, his own. Quickly feeling like he had violated something, because scars, especially collections this extensive, are so private, he helped her stand up. Maintaining eye-contact with Ella the entire time, he tied Jack's robe around her. She had trouble standing up on her own, so Alex picked her up and placed her in Jack's bed. She was lighter than he imagined, and Jack's robe was big on her, almost extending to her feet.
On Jack's bed was a grey husband pillow. Its memory foam conformed to the shape of Ella's limp body once Alex's put her down. After making sure she was still alive and breathing, Alex attempted to get her to talk. However, all he got was a few empty sighs before Ella simply closed her eyes and fell asleep. It was all very weird, but Alex felt strangely protective, so he didn't leave the room. Instead, he sat next to her in Jack's bed, deep in thought, simply reflecting over the day's events.
He must have dozed off next to Ella, because the next thing he knew, Jack was nudging him awake.
"Alex. Alex! Wake up." Alex groaned, sleep still clouding his vision. Jack sighed, quietly wondering how someone who had the instincts of a spy took this much effort to wake up. Quickly realizing that nudging him wasn't going to work, she instead asked "Is there any reason you have a girl in my bed?"
At the mention of 'girl', Alex's eyes sprung open. "Is she okay?" he asked, "I'm not sure what's happened to her. Jack's face was blank, so Alex quickly outlined what had happened from the time he went to the Royal and General Bank that afternoon. "What do you think we should do?"
They both looked over at Ella, who hadn't moved a centimeter since Alex had placed her down. She was almost eerily still, with her chest barely moving up and down.
Jack sighed. "She looks exhausted. Might as well just let her sleep through the night. I'll sleep on the couch." Neither Jack nor Alex had touched Ian's bed since his passing.
Alex shrugged, agreeing with Jack's idea. He went into the linen closet in Jack's bathroom and produced another blanket since Ella was laying on Jack's comforter. He draped it over her motionless body. He began tucking the blanket under Ella's arms when all of a sudden he felt a shooting pain in his lip and tasted blood. He swore, trying to process what had just happened.
Ella had woken up, and it was her hand that had just hit Alex. "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry," Ella apologized, now fully awake. Before Alex had a chance to ask any questions, Ella jumped into an explanation, "I've been trained to attack if I'm asleep and I feel someone touching me. I have to be woken up in a certain way or else I go feral on people. You okay, Alex?" Suddenly noticing Jack, she says "Hi there! You must be Jack. Sorry for taking your bed. Is this your robe? It's quite comfortable"
Jack laughed and nodded. "It's no problem, sleep here tonight. I'm going to get settled on the couch. Goodnight you two!" Jack grabbed her toothbrush and went downstairs, leaving Alex and Ella alone.
"And then there were two," Ella said with a lilt. Alex was still standing there awkwardly, so Ella kept talking. She was good at filling the silence. "Sorry about that, Alex. Looks like I've already broken one of your rules." Alex looked at her questioningly. "You know-sleep on the couch and don't blow anything up? I guess now that I've already failed I might as well cause some explosions.
Alex laughed, the mood much lighter now. "Maybe tomorrow."
"Promise?"
"Anyways Ella-is everything okay?" Alex asked, concerned about her. They were about to go undercover together and Alex didn't want any more...surprises.
"Yeah, Alex. I'm sorry for scaring you. That was just a byproduct of the CIA...I don't really like to talk about it," Alex nodded understandingly, "Anyways, thanks for saving me. Maybe I'll return the favor someday."
"I hope to god not," Alex laughed, "Goodnight, Ella." Alex flipped off the lights and shut Jack's door.
He walked downstairs to find Jack. "Tea?" she asked him, pouring herself a mug. Alex nodded. He needed something to calm his nerves. "What's on your mind, Alex?"
Alex stirred the steaming liquid in his mug. "I don't quite know what to think of her, Jack. She always seems to know just a little too much and is always about a step and a half ahead of me. Strangely, the thing with the shower was the most normal interaction we've had."
"You've only just met her, Alex," Jack countered, "Neither of you trusts each other and you're playing your own weird Cold War games. Just keep an open mind, and if you really do hate her, you'll never have to see her again after this message."
Both Alex and Jack snorted. They could pretend as much as they wanted-if Jones perceived them as useful Alex and Ella would certainly cross paths again.
"Anyways," Alex began, drawing out the word to change the subject, "How's Noah?"
Jack laughed and there was a twinkle in her eyes. "He's great, Alex, truly. It's been a long time since I've met someone who made me feel this good."
"Gross, Jack," Alex said playfully. As much as he pretended otherwise, he truly was happy that Jack had found someone.
"How about you, Alex? Got any special ladies in your life?"
"Yeah," Alex quipped, "Her name is Tulip Jones and she just demands all of my attention."
The pair laughed again and continued chatting until Jack grew tired and went to sleep on their couch.
Alex laid in bed reflecting on the day's events, as he often found himself doing after a particularly dense day. His thoughts ranged from poisoning the Royal and General, to meeting Ella, to the shower, to the future. He drifted off to sleep wondering if he could pull off being an expecting father.
Alex woke up the next morning to the smell of eggs and toast. He put on a shirt and combed his hair with his hands before walking down the stairs. Ella was already at their kitchen table, wearing the same clothes as yesterday, sipping a cup of tea. "Hey Alex," she greeted him cheerfully, "You'll be happy to know that I successfully took a shower this morning!" Alex chuckled and took his plate from Jack. Sitting across from Ella, he began to eat.
Before he could even take two bites, the phone rang and Jack picked it up. "John Crawley will be here in a quarter of an hour," she announced. Alex and Ella groaned at the same time.
When Crawley finally knocked at the door, Alex made a point to take a long time getting his shoes and saying goodbye to Jack. He and Ella didn't back anything except water bottles, as they knew they would be provided with whatever they needed at the Brecon Beacons.
He hugged Jack goodbye and followed Ella out the door. By the time he got outside, she was already in the car, battering Crawley with questions. "I don't understand why we can't stop in Oxford! Jones already promised we could. It's barely out of the way!"
Crawley sighed, mumbling something about needing to stay on schedule. Alex decided to join in on the fun. "Come on, Mr. Crawley, haven't you ever heard of being fashionably late?" Crawley groaned and stepped on the gas before Alex was even buckled, sending him hurtling forward.
"I can't believe this!" Ella exclaimed mockingly, "Putting your finest agent at risk is never okay, even when he's bothering you. What would Jones-y say if you hurt him just for asking an innocent question?" She fluttered her eyelashes, playing up her innocence. Crawley just sighed and turned on the radio loud enough to drown out his two backseat passengers. Eventually, he and Ella just fell asleep despite the loud music. The past few days had been exhausting for the both of them. They both woke up a few hours later to the car stopping in a parking lot.
At some point while they were asleep, they had both shifted positions so that they were resting their heads against each other. Crawley laughed at them, saying that they already looked like a couple. Ella scowled and attempted to get out of the car. It was locked. Crawley looked them both in the eyes. "You two are going to behave yourselves. You are not going to attempt to escape camp and you will listen to the Sergeant. If either of you get binned-" Crawley began.
"What'll you do, fire me?" Ella challenged.
"Deport you," Crawley said with a smirk, "I'm sure your Byrne and your father will be pleased to see you back in Washington." This shut Ella up quickly. "And you, Alex, are a criminal. You poisoned a government building. What a shame it would be if those actions had consequences."
A large, muscular black man knocked on the car's roof before Crawley could threaten Alex and Ella anymore. He was the same sergeant that Alex had met 4 years ago when he was training for the Stormbreaker mission. Crawley got out of the car and motioned the two agents to do the same.
"Hello Cub," the sergeant greeted, "Glad to see you're well," Turning to Ella, he said "We don't use names. I have no name. You have no name. If anyone asks you what you're doing, you tell them nothing. From here on out you will be known as Tigress."
"Yessir," Ella nodded, for once just doing what was expected of her.
"You two will be joining Cub's old unit, K-Unit. Since Fox has left, he has been replaced with a new recruit called Lion. Wolf, Snake, and Eagle are all still there. Your cabins are to the left about a mile that way," the sergeant said, pointing North, "Cub you'll be staying with K-Unit in the same cabin as last time. Tigress, you'll be staying right across the path in your own separate quarters. Rest up you two, because you have a long three weeks ahead of you. I'll see you at dinner."
Alex and Ella began walking towards their cabins, wanting to spend as little time as possible with the sergeant.
"God, being back at this place really brings back nightmares," Alex said, breaking the silence.
"Yeah, for real. That sergeant seems like a real stand-up guy," Ella said sarcastically, making Alex laugh. "So, is there anything I should know about this place?" she questioned.
"Yeah, actually," Alex considered, "The food is shit, the people are shit, the weather is shit, and the training is shit."
Ella laughed. "At least the mountains are pretty."
"Yeah-at least the mountains are pretty," Alex smiled.
The pair walked in silence for the remainder of their journey. Ella's cabin was slightly before the K-Unit cabin, and Alex walked her up to the door. Ella put her hand on the doorknob, but before opening it to go inside, she switched to a Southern Drawl and asked "Pick me up for dinner, Allen?"
"Why of course, Eloise," Alex said, cracking a smile, "I'll see you then."
"I'll make sure to look extra pretty in my uniform," Ella winked, walking inside.
After she had closed the door behind herself, Alex jogged over to K-Unit's cabin, his head swirling with fear and uncertainty. It had been 4 years since he had last seen all of K-Unit. He and Fox were close, like brothers even, but Fox wouldn't be here to protect him. 4 years ago, Wolf had antagonized him, but after what had happened on the plane and at Point Blanc Academy, things should be better. Hopefully. With Wolf as their leader, it's likely that Eagle and Snake had heard what had happened and would go along with whatever he said. Lion, this new guy, was certainly a wild card.
Alex knocked on the door of the cabin, marked with a large black "K." "Come in," a deep voice grumbled.
"Cub!" Snake exclaimed, "I can't believe you're alive!"
"Me neither, sometimes," Alex chuckled quietly.
"So you're back, but this time you've got your girlfriend?" Eagle asked playfully.
"Tigress is definitely not my girlfriend," Alex shuddered, "I've only just met her."
"Ahh, young love," Eagle said dreamily.
Wolf punched him in the shoulder. "Knock it off, Eagle. Good to see you healthy, Cub. Have you joined us for good?"
"No sir. Just a couple more weeks."
"Figures. Meet Lion," Wolf addressed a Latino man sitting on one of the cots. Alex and Lion nodded at each other. "Anyways, I'm sure you remember how things work around here." Alex nodded again and went to change into his uniform. He was pleased to discover that his tall, muscular body was able to fit the SAS uniform much better. His scrawny 14-year-old self could never.
When it was finally time for dinner, Alex walked out of his cabin with the rest of K-Unit. Lagging behind, he walked over to Ella's cabin and knocked on the door. "Why hello there, Allen," she said with a smirk, "So nice to see you. How do I look?"
Alex laughed at the question. Ella's uniform was much too big for her, bunching up at her ankles and wrists. Her hair was in a carefully braided updo, which looked much too fancy for the military-issued combat boots and jumpsuit. "You look great," Alex said, surprising himself with his sincerity.
"Why thank you," Ella said, also taken aback by Alex's delivery, "Uhh, anyway, we should probably eat." Alex nodded and the two of them walked in silence to the mess hall.