I'm an Alien from another dimension, not a Goblin! (Queen's Blade, DBZ Namekian SI)

The nice and refreshing glass of cold water tasted filthy in my mouth.

Naturally, I spat it all out.

The liquid in front of my eyes looked dirty even on the brown floorboards beneath my feet.

"Wait, what?"

Where am I? Why am I in some dingy old place instead of my study room?

… What's that soun-

The world spun around in my eyes as I was punched all the way across this strange room and into the wall. Surprisingly, it wasn't as painful as I had expected such an attack to be. It was more akin to having a heavy hard-cover dictionary falling upon my head from several stories up… how I know that feeling is not something I like to remember.

"Oi! What do you think you're doing standing around! Get to work freak!" My body falls to the floor, and again, I was pleasantly surprised by the lack of damage. Or rather… a swift end to the pain via some sort of regeneration effect.

How did I know that? Odd.

My assailant looked like he came right out of a hentai series. He was a fat, yet obviously powerful, green-skinned Orc. His only armor was some weird spiky headpiece, some trousers and a necklace of tiny skulls.

Those skulls likely belonged to the rest of fat fuck-ugly goblins all around the room.

Wait, if he called me a goblin… so I just got Isekai'ed into some random gobbo… Oh shit, I'm going to be next in-line on the chopping board, aren't I?

"You heard the General! Come on, you gotta work if you don't want to end up on a skewer, hehehe!" In my ruminations, some random goblin shoved his way past me, cackling with evil glee.

With no other choice, I went ahead and followed them to the "workshop" within this strange mine + workshop hybrid place.

They were making "simple" tools like whips, chains, cages, shackles, torture racks, "electricite" powered vibrators, tentacle dildos and other typical tools to break the typical hentaifu.

… Well, at least I'm learning valuable life skills? Am I right? Haha… ha… fuck my new life as a short goblin.

I hadn't had the chance to catch any decent sleep or take any real breaks due to the massive "orders" with we getting.

Is it just me? Or does no one in this godforsaken world see anything weird about monsters selling tools to humans like we're some cheap factory for outsourced goods?

At any rate, I finally had some time to myself in order to process the changes after a very busy two weeks.

For one thing, apparently, I look vastly different from the normal goblins. It was kind of obvious when the only name I had been known as in this world was "freak".

I was also the punching bag of the group due to my ability to "heal fast". So yes, I'm the stress ball for the orcs, ogres, and goblins that infested this place. Thankfully, it was nothing more than an inconvenience for me.

Talking with the more civil of these monsters had netted me close to zero useful information other than the fact that we were working in the borders of the "Swamplands", whatever that is.

Sounds like lazy writing to me.

How about they give this place a name instead?

"Fire starting, check. Tool making, check. Hunting, check. Mining, check. Refining, check. Blacksmithing, check. Rudimentary "enchanting", check…" I could afford to list down the survival skills that I devoted myself to learn as I was alone in the "waste room", aka the Room of Shit, cleaning the place up as much as I can.

Fuck this medieval fantasy world! This is outrageous. It's madness. How can anyone survive in this world without modern plumbing to keep everything from smelling like shit?!

Unfortunately, I'm not the type of super "modern" protagonist like in those generic light novels that can somehow invent modern stuff at the drop of the hat. And unfortunately, I didn't have an appropriate occupation that would reasonably explain professional engineering skills like Rimuru-sama, so I was really stuck in such a shitty situation.

On the bright side, at least I didn't have to… do any business… huh? I haven't excreted once ever since arriving here no matter how much I ate or drunk.

… Am I a demon and not just some generic monster?

Come to think of it, I haven't even gotten a look at the "new me".

I managed to find a mirror the next day.

When I saw my reflection, a whole lot of things began to click together in my head.

I was a Namekian.

I am so going to kill every single monster here. And not just the men, but the women (wait, there's no female members here…) and the children too. They're monsters, so I have to slaughter them like monsters.

Once I raise my power level that is.

...Uh… after seeing a Goblin getting splattered into the ground by one of the Ogre's hammer… maybe I should think of running away first.

They're faster and stronger than I anticipated.

I don't have a place to train here and quite honestly, I'm sick of the stuff that I had to do here. The demeaning work due to my strange appearance was… not tolerable, but something I could live with in order to survive. But the items I had been making just because I wanted to survive? That made me sick and I wouldn't stand for it.

Well, I wouldn't stand for it… once I'm strong enough to GTFO of here. Unfortunately, there's a "demon" (and I use that term broadly) town nearby with freaking gargoyles flying around, according to hearsay from some goblin complaints.

Yeah, no. I have a better idea!

I'm going to dig my way out.

Just as soon as I learn how to shoot Ki.

…

Okay. Apparently, the Z Fighter standard power up pose doesn't help a lot, all it does is makes you look like you're constipated.

Fuck you filthy gobbos! No one asked you! Your opinions are shit, shiiiiiit!

It's been a month now and I'm almost done with my tunnel placed a small distance away from one of the least used exits to the mines. Ki enhanced strength and speed is pretty good for breaking down trees and moving dirt, heh...

Ki Manipulation came easily once I had managed to sense the Ki within me and that of my surroundings. I may be one of the Dragon Clan Namekians.

If only I had some shards of the Super Dragon Ball then I could learn to make my own Dragon Balls then wish myself back home or some other world of my choice.

But I highly doubt I will be that lucky.

Speaking of luck, I managed to gather a bit more information on the world. Not a whole lot, but decent enough geographical knowledge to know where NOT to go.

Emphasis on the "not" part because damn, I am not going anywhere deeper into the Swamplands where some crazy witch and portal to the Underworld resides in. Besides, there's literally no real lifeforms there, unless you're a monster or undead… or a demon.

I'm definitely not going West, as there's a "free city" that's largely made out of humans and some migrants from other lands, typical dwarf, elf and half-breed fare. Since there's a church there, I'm guessing that there will be the type of people who will be shouting "smite the goblin" or whatever. Screw them.

I wasn't going South as yet again, human territory. There's also a desert there, and that's very bad for me, as Namekians survive on water.

North, human territory, only they're made up on the hentai anime version of Chinese people. I wouldn't be surprised if I find Cultivators or some other wackos that would likely kill me to harvest my parts for some weird ass medicine. Or just kill me for not being human.

East it was! The area to the east of the Swamplands was called the "Little Elf Forest". A large forest with a small population filled with Loli Elves. Essentially, I could survive and hide from hostile forces with plenty of time and space to train myself up until I can punt a couple of "gods", however strong they are in this kind of world.

Smuggling some more equipment and materials to the mid-way point in my tunnel was easy enough once I mastered my Namekian hearing to a point. I'm still far from reaching Piccolo's ability to hear shit from another galaxy, at most, I can only manage to not be overwhelmed by all the sounds from the mines.

It's enough to keep track of everyone and their movements, however.

When I was finally ready to make my move, I contemplated killing all the monsters in their sleep like a proper Sith Lord.

I had already accidentally murdered a goblin with a Ki Blast, that only broke most of his bones (damn my stupidly low power level, guess no one wants me to steamroll everything)... so yeah, I wasn't going to let him talk and thus, I finished him off with a few more "silent" (mostly) blasts.

It wouldn't be too difficult to do so to the rest of the monsters if I follow Goblin Slayer's method of silencing them as I stab them to death. I would also save a lot of energy that way…

… What's that sound? Now that I'm focusing my senses, I could hear women (and that's rare) talking somewhere in the distance.

"Spread out and kill every single one of them. Then burn it all down!"

"Yes, madam!"

"Uh…"

"Squire, speak up. I can't hear you."

"What if they surrender?"

"They're monsters, unholy creatures. We will do what we must."

"Oh…"

… Hmm? Intruders? Ah yes, the killing and burning type.

Ironic. It's just what the monsters would do to their human villages, only with more raping, but nonetheless, I find the similarities… encouraging? Makes me feel a little less guilty for some reason.

It seems that the choice had been taken out of my hands, and honestly, I wasn't too bothered by it.

Now I just had to get the fuck out of here. It took me longer than usual to get to the least used exit, mostly due to having to avoid my slave drivers slowly mobilizing themselves to counter the human threat.

From the sounds I could hear, it was likely a group of female knights raiding and destroying the place. Typical hentai series fare. One day, their luck would probably run out... and they would all end up as breeding slaves.

Tch, hanging around those monsters hasn't been good for my mental state.

I had almost reached my hidden tunnel when some young female knight came running at me.

Crap, I didn't want to fight or hurt them. I can't get away easily since they seem to be a few steps above the average monster, which meant that they were pretty fast for someone like me, that had a ridiculously low power level (or really bad attack potency due to lack of training) and no ability to fly (yet).

Thankfully, I had a backup plan.

I put a fearful expression on my face and fell backward to the ground, crawling away like a scared pathetic worm as the swordswoman closed in.

"P-please, I surrender, mercy please! I haven't hurt anyone! I'm sorry for being born in the wrong place…" I whimpered in a really sad manner while making loud sobbing noises.

"U-uh, I-I'm sorry. I have to…" Oh? This voice… it's that young lady that felt a bit hesitant at being so ruthless with the extermination.

Yes, I could use this.

In fact, this will enhance the Goblin Slayer typical goblin plan immensely.

"I'm too weak. Don't kill me. Please…"

I could hear the sword dipping lower, "A-a-alright. J-just go, okay. Swear to me you won't do anything bad and evil!" That's the same thing!

"T-thank you for your great kindness miss knight! I promise to be a good goblin."

Haha sike! I'm Namekian, not a goblin!

I can't be a good goblin without being a goblin, so that means I didn't promise shit! Sucker!

"Theresa… what are you doing!?"

Well shit.

I should have expected this.

"M-madam!"

"Did I just see you… about to let this smelly thing go?!"

"N-no! Yes! No!"

I was going to die. Her boss is either going to kill me or make her kill me.

No.

No no no! They will die!

I gripped the rock I kept in my hand during my last minute "Gobbo" maneuver tightly, then leaped forwards and smashed it at the back of this "Theresa"'s head, immediately following up with a flurry of Ki Blasts to her superior's face.

How convenient for me that these stupid bitches couldn't be bothered to wear anything other than some armored dress, much less a decent helmet.

My blasts smashed her face in repeatedly until it was nothing but some boney flesh mush.

"Haa...haa… what have I done…" At first, I was shocked... then numb. That's all I could feel. I wasn't horrified at all.

"Oh well."

It was only natural. She wanted me dead, so I killed her first.

Perhaps I do make a good monster after all?

"A...ah…" The short-haired knight, or squire, was groaning in great pain. Guess I was still stronger than I thought I was.

It didn't feel right to kill her, after all, she spared my life so it was only natural that I repaid her somehow. Then again, I couldn't let her live to spread the tale about my abilities lest I be hunted down and destroyed.

So I dragged her by her feet into the tunnel I made and sealed it shut, putting her over my shoulders, I ran with a burst of speed to the mid-way point where most of my equipment was and swiftly placed many restraints on her.

I was worried for her. She might have gotten brain damage from my sneak attack. It was necessary to prevent any support from her on the off chance her superior survived, yet I felt bad about it. Hmm, how can I repay this debt?

Wait… maybe, just maybe… I am a Dragon Clan Namekian that has a healing power? Well, most of my abilities have been instinctual, that or it had been unlocked through some hidden genetic memory, so I may as well try.

… Holy shit it actually worked.

She seemed perfectly healed now.

Satisfied with my work, I tied her up along with the rest of my luggage and dragged everything along the tunnel.

She had only began to stir from her slumber when I was almost finished blasting my way out to freedom.

"W-where am I? Y-you… what happen?"

"You hit your head pretty hard, so I healed you."

"O-oh, thank you… wait! Wait a minute! It was you! You dishonorable cur! How could you do this! You killed the captain! You monster! I'll- what?!"

It was only when she attempted to reach for me that she noticed just how well restrained she was.

"Stop struggling, you will only hurt yourself."

"I'll kill you."

"Heard you the first time little miss."

"Filthy dirty stinky smelly no good evil monster!"

"You do realize that your sentence is filled with redundancies, right?"

"Go die!"

"That's better."

I eventually blasted my way up, finding myself in a lush forest… and promptly covered up the entrance. Time to build an underground base!

"Do dee do dee doo…" I hummed as I began my work, making sure the wood support pillars would hold up.

The knight continued to curse at me as I worked. Ungrateful little bitch.

I just spared her life and this is how she repays me? Well, to be fair, I smashed her in the head with a rock… but I healed her and it was the thought that counts.

Oh wait, I had kidnapped her too. Still beats death, though... oh well.

I left her there and went up to the surface to hunt a few animals. I didn't need to eat, but she sure did!

"Hello there!"

"I hope you die a slow and painful death."

"You should have replied with General Kenobi."

I shook my head at the uncultured girl, feeling pity in my heart for all these fantasy medieval folk that had never watched Star Wars or had modern plumbing before.

"It's your lucky day. Guess what? I got you some fooood!"

"Kuh, I rather die."

"Suit yourself."

I cooked the food with a small fire, shackled her to one end of the room and then left the food at a considerable distance from her.

I continued to set up my base, humming along even as I ignored her insults.

Her stomach growled loudly, and I smirked at her.

She glowered angrily at me, but was impotent to do anything, slowly, but surely, her defiance began to fade as she began to feel thirst and hunger at a higher level.

"W-water, please… I...I don't want to die. I have too much… to live for."

"Good Theresa… gooood."

It was rather fun watching her debase herself to pleading at the feet of her captor, the monster who she swore to kill, just for survival.

"And the food?"

"Nope. Not until I have your… co-operation."

"...What do you want?"

"Tell me about yourself. Where do you live? Why are you a knight?"

She took her time about it, but eventually, she caved and began talking about all sorts of things. At any rate, she seemed to be from a minor noble family of some typical fantasy human country, she had no siblings but had a few cousins.

As to why she became a knight…

"I want to be strong."

"For what?"

"So that… I can become Queen?"

"Oh great. It's meritocracy then?"

"If I win the Queen's Blade then…"

"Wait, back up. What did you just say?"

Holy shit. I'm actually in a near hentai ecchi series.

Oh… I am… less surprised than I thought I would be.

I don't know the series well at all. Everything I knew came from doujins and the "Vanquished Queen's" OVA and artbook. Yes, I love bad ends, so sue me.

There doesn't seem to be unlimited cosmic power waiting for me at the horizon. At most, I could probably only learn all the magic in the land, including that of the Swamp Witch's magic (necromancy and curses will be useful), then proceed to power up until I can nuke the shit out of everything.

Still, that will take time, and for optimization purposes, lots and lots of resources.

"Say, can Hermaphrodites become Queen?"

"... What?"

"I'm not a Goblin. I'm Namekian. So I'm neither male nor female."

"There's no way anyone would let a disgusting creature like yourself sit on the throne! Save yourself the trouble and kill yourself."

"Love you too Teri Teri."

"Don't call me that. My name is Theresa!"

"Theresa so cute!"

"Eww! Don't call me by my name either! Just hearing it coming out of your mouth disgusts me."

"Whatever you say pet."

"Die!"

"How cute."

She was a lot noisier after I fed her.

It made attempting meditation in order to discover new and better ways to use my Ki a hell lot more difficult.

"Hey, can you keep quiet for a bit? I'm trying to concentrate."

"Oh, of course. I'll keep quiet because the monster is trying to concentrate. LALALALA!"

"Now you're just being rude. I guess you're not getting any toilet privileges."

"...What?"

"I suppose that you will have to settle for soiling yourself them."

"...Kuh, I won't let you have your way."

Neither of us believed that she would be able to keep that attitude for long.

Still, that didn't solve her the immediate issue of her current insolence.

Thankfully, I had just the thing.

"N-no, no, what are you doing! Stay away from me!" I leaped at her body, grinning as I attached two wires to each of her nipples under her clothes. I did the same with a third wire to her clit, slipping it under her inappropriate black panties. Seriously, she's supposed to be a knight, why is she wearing this to battle?

"My hearing is very good. Now, if I hear a single peep from you in the next... 5 minutes then I'm going to punish you. Like this."

I flicked the switch to the small apparatus connected to the "electricite" ore.

She screamed in shock and moderate pain as the electric current flowed through her.

"Did I make myself clear?"

"Y-y-yes!"

"Good girl."

5 minutes later…

"LALALALA!"

I flicked the punishment switch.

"AHHHH!"

"Be silent."

"I-it's already been 5 minutes… I counted…"

"Oh, did I say 5 minutes? Hmm, yes I did. I meant 5 Namekian Minutes, by the way."

"Wh-what?! How long is that?!"

"However long I want it to be! Ahahahahaha!"

I had to teach her how to obey the "spirit" of my commands rather than the words itself, after all.

Hmm, well, if I can't be Queen and have access to all sorts of resources… what if I put someone on the throne that would do all that I want instead?

First step, get strong. Yeah, that's a work in progress.

Second step, get loyal minions and make them strong. I can either continue on with Theresa or move on to someone else. If I can't convince them with the promise of power (contingent if I learn how Grand Elder Guru unlocks potential or succeed in creating a DBZ training course that works), then I could just break them...