I pace up and down the Factionless' warehouse. Most of the population is surrounding the fires eating their tin can lunches. I could not find an appetite with all the worries swirling in my mind, so I found myself pacing lost in my own thoughts. What are we going to do? We escaped Dauntless and Amity, we are now hiding within the factionless, Erudite has taken over, our faction are traitors, the Divergent, us, are being hunted, I miss my parents, I miss Caleb, where the hell is Tobias? My mind is racing so fast, I am out of breath. I wish Tobias was here. At least, I could run my thoughts through him, and he might have an idea or be able to calm me down. His arms around me, warming me, securing me, that's what I need right now.
Tobias said he needed to clear his head and left to walk the abandoned streets. But that was a while ago. Where is he? I don't want to go out and look for him because I do not know these streets. In Abnegation, I did not venture over here as much as my mother would have liked. She worked in this area helping out the factionless on a weekly basis. I, not having the selflessness the rest of my family did, am unfamiliar with the territory. The last thing I need right now is to get lost looking for Tobias while all of Erudite and Dauntless are looking for both of us.
Right now, Erudite has all the answers. Their combination of knowledge, research and technology are creating a power I don't know if we can fight. Now, they have teamed up with Dauntless to add fire power to their army. Jeanine Matthews is ruthless in a different kind of way than the Dauntless leaders. She is controlling, calculated, manipulative. She cannot be trusted or underestimated. If only we knew what they were up to, what their overall goal was, what on earth are they planning?
To me, if Erudite wanted to control all the factions, it wouldn't make any sense. Then we would all live like we did before the war. Unsure of where we belong, controlled by a single entity, and our freedom gone. Within the factions, we know our place, fulfill our role in society and are happy. I cannot imagine a life without factions. Despite my current situation, not sure I have a faction anymore, I still believe myself to be Dauntless. Dauntless on the run, that is.
Where is Tobias? He is my person I run this stuff by. He would know what to do next. My legs are starting to ache from my constant pacing, I see some heads turn in my direction and ignore them. I probably do look like a crazy person, but I don't care. Someone needs to formulate a plan to stop Erudite.
If only Caleb was here. He knows the Erudite. He knows their headquarters, their routines, their security measures. I need to go find Caleb. With his knowledge and Tobias and I's training, we could break into Erudite headquarters and spy on them. I know Tobias would not like my plan as it is reckless and very dangerous with just the three of us. Unless we recruited some of the factionless. They are armed and hate Erudite just as much as us. Edward would come, possibly, and if he could round up a couple more people maybe Tobias would go along with it.
I know he is worried. I am worrying him. With my rampage into Dauntless headquarters, although it was to rescue him, and my attack on Peter, both times, Tobias says I am taking too many risks. As a member of Dauntless that should be okay, however, Tobias says I need to think things through before jumping the gun.
It's hard, though, the past few days exploded my life. One second, I was graduating initiation as the top recruit in my class ready to select whatever job I wanted and the next, I was running for my life, fighting for my life, and trying to save the people I love. War does crazy things to your physical and mental wellbeing especially after I just lost both my parents and almost Tobias. Without him, I could not do any of this. He is why I am still alive. I love him. He may disagree with my actions recently, but at the end of the day, he is who I want to see, hold, and be with. We both are flawed, not the most friendly people around and despite that, we like each other. Isn't that what it is all about. Loving another person no matter what. My mother and father always said, "People are more than their appearance, more than their mistakes, more than what they seem. You need to love them for who they are on the inside."
Tobias is my no matter what.
Just then the side door opens, and I see Tobias. He is waving me over. Perfect timing, I can run my plan by him.
He holds the door open for me and I can feel the swift breeze outside. It smells refreshing after pacing in that muggy warehouse for so long. I walk through the door, and everything goes black.