He wasn't ready for the answers? Was it because he was 'too young'? Even though he was almost eleven years old which made him very much old enough.

It wasn't fair.

But grownups always knew better and he had to listen to them, so he asked no more questions. It helped, since Grandmother Irma didn't lock him inside the bedroom for the rest of the summer and even invited some other (grownup) family over for his birthday.

His parents didn't come. Neither did Bella. Those who did come, were just as silent about all of this as Grandmother Irma.

It was hell on earth to have to live through it. Knowing Sirius was out there, somewhere, but not knowing what was happening to him.

The hell came to an end on the first of September, at half past ten in the morning.

"Sirius!"

There he stood, already in his Hogwarts robes. He had his Gryffindor scarf tightly wrapped around his neck.

He didn't look back, he didn't think about his grandmother for another second as he raced towards his brother. Oh, how he wished he could hug him right then and there, but Sirius stood hunched and stared at his feet. He didn't even look up at Regulus.

Mother and Father smiled down at him. "Good morning, Regulus."

"Good morning," he greeted back. "Sirius?"

Sirius lifted his head and mumbled something, but Regulus couldn't hear what. His face. Sirius was sickly pale, looked as if he hadn't slept in months.

"Are you excited for Hogwarts?" Mother asked, tearing his attention away from his brother.

"He isn't." Grandmother Irma appeared next to him with his trunk. "The poor boy had a fright in Diagon Alley when we went to pick up his goods—came to the realisation Hogwarts isn't just for purebloods, didn't you?"

He felt himself go red and stared at his feet. Why did she have to tell them about that? It was embarrassing enough as it was...

"I question myself every day, if this is the right school for the both of you," Father said. "But Hogwarts has its upsides, and Slytherin doesn't get it as badly as the others. You will be fine, Regulus."

"I hope so," he muttered.

A chubby boy in Muggle clothing walked past with two adults dressed equally strange and Muggle-esque.

"As long as you don't mingle with that," Mother snarled with a jerk of her head in their direction. "Then it'll be fine."

"I'd never!"

"Good boy. Maybe Sirius can learn a thing or two from you this year."

But Sirius kept his head down and his mouth shut.

"Sirius," she snapped, finally getting his attention. Regulus could properly see his face now, he was sickly pale, his eyes were puffy with dark circles and he seemed slightly shaken.

"If I hear even one bad thing about you this year..." her voice trailed off, but Sirius nodded solemnly.

"Get on with it, then," said Mother, gesturing to the train. Sirius pulled his trunk along as he walked over, but Regulus hesitated.

"I'll miss you both," he said, but his parents remained stoic.

Anger welled up inside him at the way his parents were acting. Fine, he thought, figure out life by yourselves, then. He stormed off, dragging his trunk behind him. It was rather heavy so it didn't look as impressive as he had in mind, but he still reached the crowd by the train.

"Reg! Over here!"

His brother hung out of an empty compartment, waving at him. His sickly appearance took some getting used to, that much was clear... he pressed through the crowd and Sirius helped him lift the trunk up the stairs into the compartment, and put it away.

They sat down by the window, opposite each other.

"You look terrible," he said.

"Thanks a lot."

"No, I mean it, you do..."

"I know you've been stuck with them all summer but even you've got to know that's not a nice thing to say to someone."

"I just mean-"

"I know what you mean," Sirius snapped.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "Why did you-"

"So you've been hiding out here!" they were interrupted by the bespectacled boy whose parents had tried to take Sirius with them at the start of summer. "We thought you died or something, never writ us not once!"

"Still alive, unfortunately," mumbled Sirius.

"In any case, Remus and Peter—hang about, what's Junior doing here?" he asked, gesturing at Regulus.

"He's my brother."

"I know." He rolled his eyes. "Well, what're you waiting for? Unless you'd rather stay with Junior."

He laughed and left the compartment, clearly expecting Sirius to jump up and follow him out, but he stayed put.

"Can't believe it, you!" the boy stuck his head back around the corner. "You blab on about how horrible your fsmily is all year, then run off to them, all cosy-cuddly with your parents and now—you're not my Sirius any more, mate. You're a Black, that's what you are! And if you think we're still friends, well... well you're wrong!"

And with that, Potter stormed off along the train corridor.

Sirius looked the other way, staring out of the window onto the platform outside.

"Sirius..."

"What?!"

"You're-"

"I'm what?! You're all on about how weird I am, how strangely I act. I don't want to fucking hear it."

He went to say something, but the train whistle cut him off. Probably best. He wasn't really sure what to say.

He leaned his head against the window and watched the platform grow more distant until it had completely disappeared. This would be a very long journey...

Just as he was certain he'd fall asleep soon – to make the trip more bearable – the compartment door slid open again, the sound waking him from his near-dreams. This time a small plump boy with sandy hair stood in the opening, wearing something that could only be Muggle clothing. Wasn't that the boy from before?

"Get lost," he said, but the boy stepped inside.

Regulus groaned but the boy turned to Sirius. "Alright mate? S'appening? James said you're here," he said.

Sirius didn't answer.

"Sure, this is it. James said you'd 'gone mental'... 'course, I just had to see for meself—but mon... don't ignore us now!"

"Well, I'm mental. Happy now?"

The boy sat down next to Regulus and Regulus desperately tried to crawl into the window to avoid touching the boy.

"So. What's happened?"

"Nothing."

"I don't believe you," a new voice said. Regulus turned to see yet another boy standing in the doorway; brown-haired and already dressed in his school robes. Behind him stood that James.

The boys ignored Regulus and he tried his best to ignore them as he leaned back against the window, closing his eyes, listening to the boys arguing about whether or not Sirius had lost it. He had to agree that he thought Sirius was acting quite strange, but at least he didn't press on like these boys did. Some 'friends' they were.

Unfortunately for Regulus, Sirius allowed them to stay.

"What's everyone been up to this summer?" asked Sirius, to steer the conversation away from him.

"Practising Quidditch, got myself a Numbus 1001!"

"You haven't!"

"I have! I'll totally beat everyone, they'll have to let me on the team now."

Sirius put an arm around him and beamed. "You'll be the best Quidditch player Hogwarts has ever seen—James Potter: Seeker of the Century. Imagine that."

"We'll not have to imagine much longer!" Potter laughed in response.

Sirius grinned, then turned to the boy in the robes. "What about you then, Remus?"

Remus shrugged. "Went to visit my bamps last weekend. We moved closer to him, been busy with that all summer."

"Sounds dull," Potter commented.

"Trust me, it is," laughed Remus, and the boys laughed along.

It really wasn't that funny, he wanted to say. There was nothing about moving that was worth laughing about.

"What about you then, Pete?" Sirius asked the boy in Muggle clothes.

Pete tensed up. "Er... nothing really. You?"

Regulus really wanted to know the answer to that question as well, but Sirius laughed it away. "Nah but you must've done something?"

Pete was visibly uncomfortable but Sirius didn't seem to notice (or care) and neither did the two other boys. "Er... watched a lot of telly?"

"What's that?" Potter asked.

"Oh, err... it's a Muggle thing..."

The world started to spin.

"You know, sometimes I forget you live with Muggles."

Regulus' stomach turned. The boy lived with Muggles, was related to Muggles, who knows what kind of creature sat next to him right now.

All four boys laughed and Pete relaxed, but Regulus felt as if he was about to get sick.

"My mum says it makes your eyes go square," Remus said. "What? She's a Muggle, she'd know."

No. No, he had to get out of here. Now.

"My eyes ain't square now are they?" Pete argued.

He slowely got to his feet.

"Maybe you've not done it enough?" Potter offered.

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked, just as he reached the door to the compartment. He didn't answer. Couldn't answer. One word and he'd be sick all over the floor. He slid open the door.

"Square eyes would be fun though. We should find a telly to test it," he heard Potter suggest as he shut the door behind him.

Laughter again. Sirius hadn't cared enough to leave the Muggles behind. That was possibly the worst part.

He walked away from the compartment. He grew more confident in his steps the farther away he got, and started looking for other places to sit. He still had eight hours to go.

All compartments were filled with students. Older students, younger students, students who seemed to be as new to Hogwarts as he was and ones for whom this year would be the last.

Some of them were already wearing the school uniform, others were still wearing robes. But everywhere, in almost every compartment, one thing stood out: Muggle clothes.

What had the world come to?

He rushed past a compartment. It was mostly empty aside from a blonde girl reading a book, and he was two compartments on before he realised he recognised that blonde girl. He was related to that blonde girl. That blonde girl was Narcissa.

He walked back to the compartment and slid open the door, clearing his throat to get her attention.

She looked up from her book and smiled at him. "You can sit here if you want."

"Thanks," he said. He sat down opposite her. "Why are you sitting alone?"

"I used to sit with Lucius..." she shook her head and closed her book, putting it down on the seat next to her.

"What about your other friends?"

"I haven't any."

"What?!"

She shrugged.

"But... you're really nice..." if people didn't even want to be friends with Narcissa, all hope would be lost for him. His mind went back to the boy at Madam Malkin's. He, at least, had seemed interested in him... but if that was the best he could do, he'd rather not have friends at all.

She smiled briefly. "That's kind of you to say. It's just hard to make friends when you're... well..." she shook her head, looking out of the window.

"When you're what?"

"When you're a Black," she said. "First rule the other students are taught: don't befriend Blacks."

"Why would the teachers-"

"Oh no, you misunderstand," Narcissa let out a humourless laugh. "Not the teachers, Regulus. The parents. Forget everything your parents told you about being a Black because none of it is true. The 'Noble and Most Ancient House of Black' is a joke."

He jumped from his seat. "That's a lie!"

Narcissa remained calm, which somehow stopped him from actually doing anything—he mostly couldn't believe she was actually serious about what she said. It was just so... wrong.

"It is not a lie. Think about it. Have you ever been treated like royalty? Anywhere?"

He thought back to every trip he had made with his parents, or other family members, to Diagon Alley or elsewhere... he though hard about the interactions he'd had with other people there, but had to come to the shocking conclusion that he hadn't really noticed a difference between them and other customers. In fact, Mr. Ollivander in particular seemed rather annoyed by them...

"Most of the wizarding world despise us," she explained as he sat back down. "They speak of the Black Madness."

"What's that?"

"I don't know who came up with it or when, but it's been a problem for a while," she said solemnly. "Have you ever been around this many people before?"

"Not if you don't count Diagon Alley..."

"Exactly. The other families think that's extreme. They think that's 'madness'. Of course, they're perfectly fine with marrying into our supposed 'madness' for the sake of purity—there's no denying that. But befriending us?" She shook her head. "There are no reasons to befriend a Black. There's nothing to gain from friendship."

"But then... I... but I want friends..."

She gave him a sympathetic smile. "Don't we all? It's a lonely life, and you have no escape."

"That's grim."

"That's the truth. I won't be a Black forever. I've got an escape route built in. You don't have that luxury."

"Do you think that's why Sirius is friends with halfbloods and... and..."

"Blood traitors?"

He nodded. He had wanted to say mudbloods, but realised he didn't actually know if that fat boy was one. He shouldn't risk it, for his brother's sake. And even Sirius wouldn't have sunk so low, would he? He had to trust him on that. Gryffindor or not, his brother wouldn't give up on his standards.

"It may very well be. I suspect it's why..." she bit her lip and looked out of the window again, staring at the green lands they passed.

"What?"

"Nevermind that," she said, a tinge of sadness in her voice.

"Andromeda," he whispered. "It's why she left, isn't it?"

"I believe it played a role in her... going after that mudblood, yes. Not all of us are lucky enough to get the attention of a Malfoy."

He woke up to the sound of a voice. "We will be reaching Hogwarts in five minutes' time. Please leave your luggage on the train, it will be taken to the school separately."

He wiped the sleep from his eyes and looked at his cousin, who now wore her Hogwarts uniform.

"You better get changed," she said.

Why hadn't she woken him up earlier to do this? Hastily, he swapped his robes for the uniform ones. He was trying to straighten his hair when the train came to a halt.

On the platform, he and Narcissa went their separate ways; she went to a string of carriages pulled along by terrifying horse-like creatures whereas he'd be travelling by boat (thankfully).

Only problem was, he wasn't sure where these boats were, and it was near impossible to figure out amidst the chaos on the platform.

"First-years!"

It wasn't hard to find to whom the voice belonged, but the prospect of following a man who most certainly had giant blood in him... it was unappealing to say the least.

Hogwarts was off to a great start.

He followed the giant and made a point not to talk to or look at it. Best not to give it any funny ideas about him. Giants were murderous creatures and he preferred to stay alive at least long enough to actually reach the school.

He wasn't scared, of course. Just nervous.

He waited for the other first-years to gather at the edge of the lake, standing as far away from the giant as possible. It told them to get into the boats in groups of four, and he reluctantly accepted this was his reality now: following orders given by a vicious beast.

Surely Mother and Father didn't know? Surely they didn't send him here knowing he'd be around that? Halfbloods and Mudbloods were one thing, but everyone knew killing was in a giant's nature. It was only a matter of time before someone got hurt, and he could only hope that someone wouldn't be him.

He shared the boat with the boy he had met at Madam Malkin's and two girls who seemed to know each other, for they were whispering excitedly the entire time.

"What do you think Hogwarts'll be like?" the boy asked, and Regulus pretended to not have heard him.

"I'm Cornelius, by the way, but everyone calls me Neil," the boy tried again.

He inspected his fingernails. He'd rather have no friends like Narcissa had said. He wouldn't stoop so low as to befriend halfbloods or – Merlin forbid – worse.

"It's OK, I'm nervous too—oohh!"

Regulus looked up as not just Cornelius but the two girls gasped as well, and saw the castle come into view. It was even bigger than he had imagined, and he had to admit he was impressed.

Once they reached the castle, and they'd all climbed out of the boats, the giant led them to the entrance. They went up stone steps towards a pair of huge double doors.

The giant knocked, and for a moment Regulus thought the doors would break from the force—but they force opened to reveal a stern witch in emerald robes. "I'll take them from here. Thank you, Hagrid."

The Entrance Hall was... marvellous, and he understood why some of the students let out gasps of awe. There were two ancient-looking suits of armour by the front doors that were particularly impressive.

The witch led them to a small chamber off the hall and introduced herself as Professor McGonagall (he didn't recognise that name), briefly introduced the Houses to them, then disappeared through the door leaving them there.

"We'll have to fight a troll," one boy said loudly. "My brother told me."

"No, a dragon!" another boy called out. "My aunt said they get you up against a dragon. If you win, then you're a Gryffindor."

"What about if you lose, though?" a girl asked.

"I guess then you're just dead..."

"What if we're up against a troll and a dragon!" a third boy suggested.

Regulus would have laughed at their idiot ideas if he wasn't so nervous about the Sorting himself. Not about the method, no—nobody had ever tried to hide that from him. No, he worried about Houses. What if he didn't end up in Slytherin? Had Sirius known, last year, when he stood here... had he been as nervous as he was now?

When Professor McGonagall returned and had them line up as they walked towards the Great Hall, he was positively shaking.

"Look at the sky!" the girl in front of him yelled as they entered the Great Hall.

He spotted Narcissa at the Slytherin table as they walked past. She gave him an encouraging smile and it gave him some renewed energy to walk on.

They passed Ravenclaw and took a turn, walking between the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff tables. He stole a quick look at the Gryffindor table at the far end of the Hall—there he was, unmistakably a Black and yet... his Gryffindor scarf was an eyesore.

Sirius sat with the boys from the train, and from what he could see, his brother was poking Potter with his fork. Best not to question his antics on a day like this.

The dirty old hat on the stool before them proved that his parents were right about the method of Sorting, not that he had ever doubted that.

"Mum wouldn't even dream of letting that in the house," a boy next to him commented, and Regulus found himself chuckling in agreement.

The hat started to sing a song he was sure it thought was very clever. Regulus, on the other hand, thought it was the worst thing he'd heard in years.

"Abbott, Joseph," McGonagall called out once the hat was finished.

Joseph Abbott was a small boy with dark blond hair who wobbled on his feet as he walked over to the stool. He put on the hat. "HUFFLEPUFF!"

Relieved, he hurried over to the cheering Hufflepuff table. Regulus rolled his eyes. Hufflepuff, really? He'd rather be a Gryffindor. At least Gryffindors had values, even if they were the wrong ones.

"Alton, Brenda."

A very nervous girl approached the stool, sat down and tried on the hat. "HUFFLEPUFF!"

Was everyone bound to end up in Hufflepuff this year?

"Avery, Hektor."

A pale brown-haired boy walked up to the stool, but unlike Abbott he had an air of confidence about him.

He sat down and put on the hat. A few seconds passed, then: "SLYTHERIN!"

The Slytherin table gave loud cheers as Hektor Avery ran towards them. That could be him. That would be him.

"Beckwith, Becky" was another Hufflepuff and then: "Black, Regulus."

He took a deep breath and walked over to the stool. Slytherin, he thought to himself. It had to be Slytherin.

He sat down and took the hat. Relax, he told himself, it'll be okay. He'd get into Slytherin. He knew he would. He just had to.

He lowered the hat and it barely touched his head when it belted out that beautiful word that washed all his worries away: "SLYTHERIN!"

The applause that followed was heavenly. He handed the hat back to McGonagall and rushed towards the Slytherin table. He was a Slytherin. He'd done it. He'd make his parents proud of him, prouder than they ever could be of Sirius.

He sat down next to Hektor Avery, opposite a prefect who did nothing but glare at him and with his back to the rest of the Hall. There were far too many people here for him to be comfortable.

"I'm Regulus," he said to the boy next to him, ignoring the cheers coming from across the hall. Ravenclaw just gained a student.

But he recognised the name Avery, so it wasn't too dangerous to try and talk. And he wanted to talk to the boy. Maybe Narcissa was wrong about her whole 'no friends' thing.

"I know, now shut up," Hektor Avery said. At first he thought that maybe he wanted to watch the Sorting, maybe he knew the boy who sat on the stool. But the boy joined Gryffindor House and Avery seemed largely uninterested.

So the only other conclusion was that Avery just didn't want to talk.

"Bogie, James," McGonagall read, and he almost felt sorry for the scrawny boy that walked up to the stool. Imagine having the last name Bogie.

But he couldn't turn to Sirius to laugh about it. Because Sirius sat across the hall, most likely laughing at this new Ravenclaw's name with his stupid new friends whilst he was stuck in Slytherin with a glaring prefect and a boy who had no intention of talking to him.

It wasn't fair.

"Braithwaite, Betty" was another Hufflepuff, "Brent, Esther" joined Ravenclaw and "Buckley, John" followed her there.

He was about to give up hope of more Slytherins joining when the hat called out SLYTHERIN and an ugly girl sat down next to the prefect who gave her a warm smile. So the ugly girl – what was her name, Bullface or something? very fitting – got a smile but he got nothing but glares? What kind of prefect did that?!

His stomach grumbled as "Blythe, Patrick" joined Ravenclaw. This was going to be a long, long night.