A/N: BAM! TWO UPDATES!

DO I HEAR A THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRD?!

*EDIT* There we go! Let the series continue!

Could the trolls please stop? I've had to delete several-twenty five in this chapter alone!-anonymous reviews of nasty vitriol in the last hour or so and its making me upset. I've also had a rather nasty chap known as "Doom Marine" chanting at me to kill myself in the review section of my recent stories. Look if you don't believe me. Jokes on him though, that's not my real name.

*Secondary Edit*

I published this earlier, but the notification only came now? I don't know why? Notifications are being delayed again, but reviews are showing up? How many times has this been happening in the last month? No one is to blame for it of course, the site just goes wonky sometimes. Really kills my drive to write though...

Because this hasn't gotten any reviews for this chapter...

Only flames...cruel...nasty, vicious flames...

...and that makes me a sad boy.

So...reviews? Please?

I'll beg if I must.

T_T

As ever, this'll be gone in two days if folks don't like it, yadda yadda...

Think of this as a different take, a scene that never happened in A Most Unlikely Card.

You could also call it a teaser or sorts. A test, even.

Do you like it? Please let me know.

Ever heard of Yakumo?

IIIIIIIIII have~!

"The road lies open before you, my dear.

The paths are may, long and winding, they are.

If you dislike them, then forge your own destiny. Simple as that."

~?

A Most Unlikely Teammate

I killed my parents.

The knowledge threatened to tear Yakumo apart at the seams as she hugged her arms to her chest. Grief warred with guilt, tearing her apart. With each passing second she felt the memories return, the god awful truth of her sins weighing her down. They crept through her veins like poison, worse than a a genjutsu, because she couldn't dispel this one. Her illusions might well be real, but they couldn't change the truth of this world. Not for long. They couldn't bring back the dead, and they certainly couldn't undo what she'd done. They couldn't forgive her. She couldn't forgive herself.

I killed them.

I...I killed them.

Ikilledthemkilledthemkilledthem...

And yet with this news came opportunity. The chance to seize her dreams, to have all she'd ever wanted. A lone headband gleamed in her lap in the low light, a shining, metallic plate bound to a purple cloth. This was all she'd ever dreamed of. Before Kurenai-sensei. Before the fire. Before all the deaths. Before...well...everything.

Perhaps in another route, another time, someone would've been more gentle with the news.

Unfortunately for her, Mitarashi Anko was many things, but gentle was not one of them. She was a mistress of poison, a bit of a dango addict, and the master of tough love. Oh, she wasn't cruel, but if you were lying to yourself she'd slap you right out of it. The proof she'd presented to the girl-poor kid, having it just laid at her feet like that-was irrefutable, and quite possibly the only reason she hadn't gone berserk. Well. That and the sealing tag the jonin had slapped on her when she'd threatened to get out of hand.

"You don't like your destiny?" the snake mistress scoffed, flicking her forehead. "Tough. Then change it."

"I don't know how!" the words exploded out of her in a rush. "What am I supposed to do?!"

"Cant answer that for you, kid." all she received was a shrug.

"That doesn't help at all!"

Anko let her stew for what felt like an eternity.

Soft, miserable sobs echoed off the four walls of her prison as she wailed; as her broken heart curled in on itself and her body did the same. Yet Anko didn't leave her. Yakumo almost wished she would. She felt small now, her anger gone, gutted by the truth. She was tiny without it. Miserable. Alone. Her faint hopes were little more than a mere mote of dust compared to her grief. But grief never lasts forever. It hurts, it aches, it burns, but eventually it begins to fade. Minutes passed. Hours.

Eventually, her tormentor spoke.

...I'm taking a mission to a foreign country in the morning," the words were soft, deliberate, chosen with great care. "I'd like you to come with us."

Yakumo raised her head.

"Us?"

"I'm looking after a bit of a brat these days." the jonin smiling sheepishly and scratched the back of her head. "He's a bit like you, if a little older. He's stubborn, pigheaded..

-those sound like insults." Yakumo sniffled.

...yet underneath it all he's got a heart of gold." Anko talked over her, smiling. "I think you'd like him. You both come for a similar background. I think you'd get along." Unspoken was the silent hope that she harbored in her heart; she wanted-needed!-to give Naruto a connection the village; something or someone that would prevent him from hauling off and fleeing the moment they were out of the gates. He was a good person, but so too had her mentor been, int he begin. Perhaps if he had a connection, he wouldn't turn out like Orochimaru. She hoped. She prayed. Because if he did...they wouldn't be able to stop him. Of course, the girl knew none of this.

Yakumo dithered.

Someone...like her?

She wanted to say yes.

More than anything she wanted to say yes.

The notion of having her dream, being with someone who understood...!

Yet a thorn of fear pricked her heart and held her back. "But what if I lose control?"

"You won't." A gleam of...something flashed through those hazel eyes, gone before Yakumo could grasp at it. "Trust me. He's more than capable of keeping you from going berserk. I dare say some of his friends might even know how to seal that "thing" inside you away for good." And it was the truth. Surely one of those "Heroes" would take pity on the girl.

Yakumo was listening intently now. "Friends?"

"Heroes, more like." the jonin groused, reliving a bad memory. "You won't believe it until you see them. Who knows? Some of them might take a liking to you."

The girl was silent for a long, ponderous moment. Weighing her words, her own actions.

Then she raised her gaze, and there was a fire in her eyes. "Tell me more."

Anko silently pumped a first.

All according to plan.

Gotcha.

A/N: Anko's a good girl, she's just loyal to Konoha. Whether that's a good or bad thing by this point...who can say?

And just like that, we get to see a scene that didn't quite happen, but may just arrive anyway.

As ever, this will be gone in two days if folks don't like it. So there you are.

There we have it. A teaser of sorts for A Most Unlikely Card

Like it? Don't like it? Kill with fire? Tell me please.

So in the Immortal Word of Atlas...

...Review Would You Kindly?

R&R! =D