Chapter 1

Hermione rose early for work that morning, return to sleep eluding her as it so often did these days.

Especially on days like today

she thought, feeling a knot tightening in her stomach. Though she had been working as an Auror for almost five years now she still got nervous before a job. And today was the riskiest job to date.

She opened the small wardrobe and winced when the hinges creaked loudly, cutting the quiet of the morning. She paused to listen, but heard no sound come from the adjacent room where Teddy was sleeping.

Hermione had been staying at 12 Grimmauld Place for almost a month now, at Harry's insistence. The house had been left to him by Sirius, but he and Ginny had not long moved to a quiet cottage in Godric's Hollow to better house their growing family. Since then Grimmauld Place had become somewhat of a guest house for friends in need. Remus and Teddy had been there on-and-off since the end of the war, whenever Remus was struggling to afford rent elsewhere. Hermione knew that Harry would let them live there rent-free permanently, but neither of them daren't wound Remus' pride by mentioning it.

Hermione was a more recent addition to the rotation of guests ever since her marriage had broken down a few months ago. She sighed as her thoughts drifted yet again to Ron, and she felt the now-familiar maelstrom of sadness, anger and, if she was honest with herself, relief. Things hadn't been great between them for longer than she liked to admit to herself, but she still grimaced when she remembered the shock and pain of him standing in the kitchen doorway telling her that he was leaving her for someone else. Hermione Granger never fails; that was her personal rule. And yet, somehow, she had been unable to succeed when it came to her own marriage; perhaps precisely because for once, despite her best efforts, the solution could not be found within the pages of a book.

But today, she reminded herself, was not a day about Ron. She had important work to do and needed to be on top form. She wasn't about to let her emotions stand between her and her task. She ran her hand along the clothes rail, skipping over her usual Ministry uniform, and instead tugging out a plain black shirt and trousers. She dressed quickly and tiptoed down to the kitchen to make herself a strong coffee. The kettle was already warm and she frowned, puzzled, as a prickly feeling of being watched came over her.

'Morning.'

Startled, she whipped around and drew her wand.

'Merlin,' she swore, then relaxed as she took in Remus sitting at the dining table clasping a steaming mug. A hint of a smile played on his lips.

'How are those reflexes?' he teased and she flashed a smile before returning her attention to the kettle.

'I'm not sure I'm quite awake yet.'

Once finished with brewing her drink she turned to face him and leaned against the countertop.

'You're up early?' she enquired before taking a sip, the bitter flavour immediately helping her to feel more alert.

'Couldn't sleep,' he replied vaguely.

'I see.'

She quickly ran the dates in her head and realised that the full moon was just two days away.

'You know, I'd be happy to look after Teddy tomorrow until Saturday. I have a job today so I'll be off shift then. Only if you want of course…'

Remus considered this offer for a moment. Hermione expected him to politely decline as he usually did when help was offered. It seemed he disliked the notion of being burdensome and preferred instead to solve his own problems. She was surprised, therefore, when he looked her in the eye and nodded.

'That would be wonderful if you could. Thank you Hermione, I really appreciate it.'

Things must be tough at the moment, she mused.

Remus was an excellent housemate; quiet, tidy, considerate and generally kept himself to himself. Ever since she first met him at Hogwarts Hermione had liked and respected him, but in just these last few weeks she had come to value his company. She hadn't known him very well during the war, but her being off work and him job hunting for the last few weeks had afforded plenty of time for conversation, which was always easy and interesting. He was incredibly knowledgeable and she enjoyed musing hypotheticals together or discussing the finer points of some obscure book they had both read. Other times they just sat in companionable silence reading in the library. She also appreciated that he had never asked about the elephant in the room. Not once had he mentioned her sudden arrival at Grimmauld Place, though she suspected that Harry must have told him. She was glad though, because she wasn't sure she was ready for the humiliation of admitting her failings out loud just yet.

Teddy, on the other hand, took after his late mother. He was a loud, playful and curious five year old, with a wild mane of hair and eternally bare feet. He had taken quite a shine to Hermione and she gladly played with him when Remus was out at interviews. In truth she enjoyed the distraction, and the simple, innocent company of the child.

'No uniform today?' he observed, and she shook her head.

'Incognito,' she said with a smile.

'Oh yeah? What's the job?'

'I'm afraid that's classified.'

He chuckled and nodded.

'Of course. Forgive me - sometimes I forget I'm not in the know any more.'

Hermione sipped her drink once more.

'Do you miss it?' she asked.

'The Order?' he clarified and she nodded, 'Gosh, no.'

She cocked her head to the side, surprised by this answer, and he continued,'

'Living in constant fear? Not knowing who you can trust?' He shook his head. 'No. The sky may be darker now, but at least the waters are calm. I'm not sure I would trade that for anything.'

He wore a hard to read expression and she looked down at the mug between her hands as she considered his response. Giving it all up had never once crossed her mind. There was too much left to avenge. Surely Remus of all people, having lost so many loved ones to the war, felt that?

'How are you feeling about today?' he asked gently.

'Nervous,' she admitted. 'It's been a while since…'

She stopped herself, but saw his interested expression like he wanted her to continue. She shook her head.

'I just mean, it's been a while. But it'll be okay. I've done hundreds of jobs… I mean… none quite like this but… I have all the training, so I'll be fine…' her tone had quickened and she wasn't quite sure which of them she was trying to convince.

'I don't know how you do it,' he said softly.

'What?' she said, puzzled.

'How you have the drive to keep on fighting every day.'

'I just still feel so angry. Like so much was taken away. So much wrong still to put right. How do you not feel angry every day?'

He smiled sadly.

'I guess I learned that anger serves no purpose. I've done all my stamping and screaming and pleading… but the dead can't hear us. Anger neither makes us happy nor repairs our broken hearts. All we can do is find things to live for now.'

He wore an odd expression and she suddenly felt scrutinised under his gaze. She quickly looked down at the floor, unsure what to say, as the image of a certain red headed man swum before her eyes. Suddenly a loud thud from upstairs broke the silence, followed by a wailing cry. Remus winced but then chuckled.

'And I fear that mine has just woken up,' he smiled and rose from the table, 'If you'll excuse me. '

And with that he was gone. She heard him climb the stairs and soon the crying had stopped, the stillness of the morning settling once more.

She finished her coffee and made herself some breakfast, and was headed for the front door when she heard her name.

'Hermione, wait.'

She turned to see Remus descend the last few stairs.

'Here… take this.'

He handed her a small object and she frowned at it. It was a tooth of some kind, pale and shiny as if years of touch had worn it smooth.

'What is it?'

'I'm not exactly sure,' he admitted. 'But it's a protective charm, to keep you safe.'

She looked up at him.

'I received it from a friend a very long time ago and, well, here I am, so I suppose it worked. But now I suspect you need it much more than I do.'