On her list
Bridgerton
Penelope/Colin, Eloise
I'm not good at writing the Lady Whistledown parts, but please pretend it is believable, please!
Everything was happening so fast, Penelope didn't know how to react.
She had tried so many times to tell Colin about her secret but the engagement had happened so fast, and then each time she tried to tell him, something or someone had interrupted them. Sometimes it was simply his eyes and the way he looked at her, sometimes it was a member of their families, but each time frustrated her more. She needed to tell him, especially now that the Queen had put a 5000 pounds reward on any clue that could help find out who she was.
She had been about to tell Colin that she was Lady Whistledown when Cressida announced that it was her, then she had tried to tell him again and it's Eloise who had interrupted. Eloise pulled her to the side and Colin followed. His presence didn't seem to stop Eloise.
"Pen, please, you need to help me. I know that I was wrong to cast you out of my life, our fight was mainly my fault, but now Cressida is furious that I broke our friendship after she decided to lie and say that she's Lady Whistledown. She says that she'll reveal bad things about me and ruin me forever because I refused to help her write a fake issue! Please, I know you said you were going to stop but at least one more time, for me please?" Eloise pleaded, looking desperate.
"What? What is going on?" Colin asked.
"You have the worst timing ever Eloise!" Pen shook her head.
"Please!" Eloise pleaded.
"Of course I will help you, do you honestly believe that I would allow Cressida Cowper of all people to take credit for all of my work? We need to go to my room, now." Pen replied.
"You're Lady Whistledown?" Colin whispered, angry.
"I have tried to tell you so many times, but each time we were interrupted. Please, just come with us, let me do this and then we'll talk. Please?" She asked him, looking him in the eyes and he nodded.
"We need to cover our absence. Eloise, you go tell our mothers that I'm not feeling well and that you and Colin are going to take a walk home with me because a bit of fresh air should help. Add that you're coming with us to try and mend our friendship, that would explain why you're also coming. We'll meet you at the carriage." Penelope decided.
As they waited for Eloise to come back, Penelope, who knew that main reason Colin hated Lady Whistledown was because of what she had written about Marina, explained everything, as well as she could, as sincerely as possible. He could not deny that he understood. Had the roles been reversed, with the way he felt now, he would have done the same.
Then, once Eloise joined them, Pen explained how the Queen had threatened Eloise, believing her to be Lady Whistledown after she had left Anthony's failed wedding to meet with Mister Theo Sharpe. The Queen had taken it as a betrayal because Eloise had claimed not to be able to find the writer the previous year. She did not have a choice, writing something this bad saved Eloise from the Queen's anger because it was something that Eloise would have never written about herself, and Pen hinted that the truth, that Eloise was going to be alone with a boy, would have been much worst.
By the time they arrived, she was done explaining herself.
The two followed her inside the house, and they managed not to be spotted. Only Rae, her maid, saw them.
"Rae, please make sure to keep watch, if my mama arrives, we're not here and she's not to come to my room." Pen asked, and her maid nodded.
"How do you know that she will not tell your mother?" Eloise asked her as they climbed the stairs to her bedroom.
"Because I'm using some of my Lady Whistledown money to pay her extra to obey me and not my mother. Money tends to make people loyal." Pen replied, making Colin smile.
As soon as they entered her room, Eloise went to open the floor board and took what Pen would need out of it.
"That is a lot of money. I had no idea Lady Whistledown made this much." Colin commented, already imagining a new vault in their house for her Whistledown money.
"So you are not marrying her for her money?" Eloise tried to joke but her brother was in no mood to joke with her.
He knew that he wouldn't stay angry at Pen, she was HIS Penelope, his wife to be, the love of his life, but there was one thing he understood: her argument with Pen at the end of last Season had hurt Penelope, and he could not forgive it that easily, even from his sister. Especially since, apparently, his sister had befriended someone that had hurt Penelope in the past. He could not forgive easily someone who hurt his Pen.
With fresh paper, Penelope sat at her desk and started writing, concentrated on the piece of paper. Colin went to stand behind her and he watched as her quill flew over the paper, leaving well written words and well formed sentences behind it. Once she was done writing the introduction, she stopped and looked up at Colin behind her:
"How angry are you with me?" She asked him.
"Why?" He asked her, surprised.
"Are we still engaged?" She asked, worried.
"What? Of course we are still engaged! Pen, no matter what, I do love you, always! I cannot let you go!" He exclaimed.
She smiled and went back to writing.
"If there is one thing that this author cannot stand, it's a liar, especially one who pretends to be someone they are not in order to gain from someone else's hard work. Miss Cressida Cowper is a complete fraud. How dare you use MY NAME? My own hard earned reputation! You could not even write a complete issue, all you could manage is a few badly worded lines that a child could have written just as easily and you dare claim to be me? My dear, you obviously lack the good education it takes to form a complete sentence without the help of your mother and you wish to replace me?
That is laughable at best!
Let me tell you that your actions have now placed you and your family on my list, and trust me dear readers, it is not a list anyone wishes to be on. Do you know all the things I could write to ruin your family Miss Cowper? On your father and your mother? On yourself?
If you think that I always write everything that I know about everybody, think again.
You do not want me to open my file on your family, it would completely ruin the lot of you and you would be forced to leave the country. Then again, this idea doesn't sound too bad, does it? I know for a fact that many of the eligible young ladies you have bullied, humiliated or injured in order to get a gentleman's attention would be glad to be rid of you.
Truthfully, Who do you think would miss you, Miss Cowper? Have you managed to keep some friends over the years or have you driven them all away with your appalling behavior?"
"What do you know about her family that's so bad?" Colin asked her, reading over her shoulder.
"Nothing yet, but threats always work well, and with me saying I know things, you can be sure that the rumors will start. Her parents will start to panic and force her to do as I say. A man like her father cannot build such a fortune without doing anything illegal. People have to know things." Penelope replied as she kept on writing, making Colin smile softly at her while Eloise sat on the bed, watching anxiously.
"Truly, I do understand Miss Cowper's pain. The young miss thinks so highly of herself that it must pain her greatly to see that Miss Penelope Featherington, a simple wallflower who came out the same year as her, one that Miss Cowper has bullied and mocked so often, found a True Love Match in Mister Colin Bridgerton. Knowing that she would remain on the shelf, about to become a spinster when Miss Featherington would be married to a man she loved must have hurt Miss Cowper in her pride, but does it justify such desperation? Trying to steal my name for a mere 5000? Miss Cowper, I'll have you know that I earn a lot more than that in a season. In truth, I might have found Miss Cowper's action amusing if it was not so pathetic.
If what you seek is, as you've said several times, a good match, then, Miss Cowper, you might want to start working on your horrid behavior.
This author wonders if such actions are truly your own fault or the result of a terribly bad education from your parents. Although Miss Featherington's mother, Lady Portia Featherington is known for having never been warm or loving towards her youngest daughter and yet it doesn't stop the young miss from being capable of goodness, of caring for others. She finds it in herself to be nice.
So, Miss Cowper, what is your excuse? Are you choosing to be this way, or did your parents simply forget to teach you good manners and morals?
I could have ignore your behavior towards other, I could have let you live your life, but alas you tried to steal my name, and you lied to our beloved Queen in order to do it. I do not know if I can forgive this sort of terrible actions.
I demand a public apology, Miss Cowper.
At the next social Event, you will kneel and apologise, ask for my forgiveness for your lies. You will beg for our Queen's forgiveness for your lies and, maybe, just maybe, I will not make it my life's mission to ruin you and every member of your family.
If you do this Miss Cowper, maybe you will not be on my list."
Colin was in awe as he watched the woman he loved write. She was concentrated and wrote as easily as she breathed air. This was truly her calling, her purpose. He would never be able to stand in her way, he would make it his life mission to make sure she'd be able to continue for as long as possible.
"Your Majesty,
I understand your curiosity and I believe that I should prevent the both of us from wasting any more time on this. I simply do not have the time to print a special issue every time someone claims to be me to claim the reward money. If you make a public announcement promising that my identity will remain a secret between the two of us and that I will not be punished, I shall step forward. I will come to you, hours before the delivery of the next issue of my gossip sheet, with the draft of the handwritten issue in my hands. There will be no need for you to pay me the reward money, we both know that I make enough that I do not need it. Maybe you could donate it to the Danbury school for orphaned girls? It would be put to good use this way.
Writing my column was never about the money, and I believe that you can understand that. We are both women of power and we are both naturally skilled for what we do.
If you need more proof, once we are face to face, I will be able to speak to you about the present moment in Lady Whistledown fashion. unlike Miss Cowper, I have what is called talent, and I can do it without preparation.
If you do not want to make such an announcement, then I shall either stop writing all together, and we both know that you and the ton would miss me terribly as you all did when I stopped writing for a few weeks last season, or I will simply stay in the dark, making it impossible for anyone to find out who I am."
"Wait, you want to come forward?" Colin asked, worried, as he placed his hand on her arm, stopping her from writing more before she answered.
"Only to the Queen. She just wants to make sure Lady Whistledown is on her side, this is what I will do. She wants to make sure that the author won't turn against her some day because she realizes how much power I truly have. She knows that I could easily start an uprising against her family if I wanted to, she just wants to be reassured that ti would not happen. Trust me, and trust her. It will all be alright." Pen replied before she continued to fill her paper with other news and gossip she heard.
"You are unbelievable. You called my writing effortless and yet you write this column with the same ease you breath. You are simply amazing, Pen." Colin told her softly, obviously impressed and not angry anymore.
"I've been doing it for a while." She smiled.
"I guess now I will have to start worrying about your secret identity remaining a secret. I shall make it my mission every day to protect you the best way I can." he told her softly as his hand touched her cheek lovingly.
They were now facing each other.
"Do not worry about that, I have already resigned myself to stop printing my column." she shook her head.
"But why? You obviously love doing it, it makes you so happy! Why would you stop?" he asked her.
"My mother told me that once I marry, I have to give up on my own dreams and that a married woman cannot pursue her own dreams, but only her husband's. So I have to give this up." She replied, shocking Colin and Eloise, who remained silent on the bed.
"Pen, your mother has never been more wrong about anything! Maybe she had to give up on her dreams when she married your father, but that does not apply to you. As long as this makes you happy, you need to continue! I would never dream of standing in your way, of stopping it! This is your purpose, you should not give up. It's too important. My own purpose will be to protect and support you through it all." he declared, making her smile softly at him.
"Are you sure?" she asked him.
"Absolutely. I do love a woman of power and there is only the Queen who has more power than you in this ton, maybe. I am proud to be the man you will spend the rest of your life with. Proud to be loved by such a smart and clever woman." he replied before they exchanged a kiss.
The kiss started small, but it started to grow in passion when Eloise spoke:
"You both do remember that I am still here with you, do you not? There are things that I do not wish to witness. Nor do I think they are supposed to be happening yet."
They pulled apart, chuckling.
"What now?" He asked her.
"We go to the printer. Eloise, please look at the bottom of that chest over there, the blue cape. There is no time to pass through the usual channel, I have to deliver it myself this time if I want it to be out for tomorrow morning." Pen said as she folded her next issue.
"What are the usual channels?" he asked her.
"Madame Delacroix. She's my friend and she has been helping me against a few well worded compliments here and there. I give her the issue, she places it in clothes and delivers it to the printer who returns the box to her." she explained.
"Here." Eloise handed Penelope what she wanted.
"This is a maid's outfit." Colin commented.
"Of course, how else would I not be noticed or suspected in this part of town?" She replied with a smirk he grew to love.
They took the carriage to the printer and Colin and his sister stayed outside the door while Penelope went inside, speaking to the printer in an accent they had never heard before.
"You are truly amazing, you know that?" Colin told Pen when she walked out.
"If you two start kissing again, I swear I will jump out of this carriage and walk home alone." Eloise frowned.
As they rode home, Eloise smiled at Penelope, happy to have her friend back, and to know that she'd be happy.
.
The next day, Penelope found her mother reading her latest issue and she was surprised to see her mother smiling at it. She read the article to her daughter with an amused smile.
"I knew that Cowper girl wasn't capable of doing this. I cannot wait for this afternoon's Garden Party to see what she will do." Portia smirked.
"Neither can I. She deserves everything bad she'll get but aren't you friends with her mother?" Pen smiled at her mother.
"She was never a real friend, I would not cry at her bad fortune as she did not cry at ours." Portia shook her head and, for the first time, pen and her mother were on the same page.
A little later that day, Penelope and her family joined the Bridgerton's at the Garden Party. Colin offered his arm to his fiancé but before she could grab it, Eloise came to hug her, a sign that they had reconciled.
"Finally." Violet whispered with a smile.
"If I can have her back, please." Colin asked his sister, his hand out to grab Pen's.
"But you'll have her all the time when you get married, why can't I have her for just a little bit today?" Eloise asked joyfully.
"How about you both grab one of my arms and stop making it look like I'm a toy you both want." Penelope suggested and so she found herself with her best friend and her future husband on each arm.
The Queen was present, so was almost everyone that counts, including the Cowper family. Both parents looked furious and Cressida seemed equally angry. The latest issue of Lady Whistledown had humiliated her and ruined all of her hopes and dreams.
The Queen stood up and everyone fell silent.
"Just like all of you, I have read this morning's issue of Lady Whistledown and while I never truly believed that miss Cowper was skilled enough to be her, I am still extremely disappointed by such a desperate lie. To Lady Whistledown I will say this: You will not be in trouble if you come forward, and your identity shall remain a secret for as long as you wish it to be so. I simply wish to know who you are, and discuss with the educated and well informed Lady that you are. You are a woman of great power, and I believe you can do a lot of good with it, I simply wish to know your plans for the future, your ambition. Maybe discuss it over tea once in a while. Now, Miss Cowper, I believe you have something to say to your Queen, this ton and Lady Whistledown?" The Queen spoke.
"I will not apologize for trying to get that money! I deserve this money! I did nothing wrong!" Cressida declared, her head held high, a glass of lemonade in her hands.
"Oh yes, you will speak loudly and apologize Cressida or trust me an exile in Scotland will be the least of your worries." her father growled.
"I am sorry I got caught. I am sorry that I have a father who will not help me find a good husband, I am sorry my father wants to marry me off to one of his disgusting aged friend. I am sorry that the people of this ton are so stupid that they do not see a great person like me when they see one. I am sorry for being born with such selfish parents that they refuse to give me the things I want. I am sorry that stupid Penelope Featherington, of all people, got to be engaged before me and that she..." Cressida yelled.
"Enough now! Do not speak about Pen this way!" Colin interrupted her, furious.
Looking around, Pen noticed that the entire Bridgerton Family, her mother and brothers in law, Lady Danbury and her brother looked as angry as Colin was and it touched the writer.
"Let it go, Colin, she doesn't deserve this attention." Penelope shook her head.
Benedict and Anthony took Colin a little further to help him calm down.
"Oh, of course, Miss Wallflower has to forgive! She has to show how nice she is, she had to prove that stupid Whistledown was right." Cressida spat.
"Forgive you? No, I cannot do that, not after your many cruel mockeries, but what I can do is pity you Cressida, and that is enough for me to be able to move on from everything that you have done and said." Penelope replied.
"Please, your Majesty, forgive our daughter! She does not know what she is saying! She's sorry! She lied for attention and the money because we reduced her pin money, please forgive her!" Mister Cowper exclaimed.
"I see that Lady Whistledown's threats are scaring you... What could she possibly know about you to make you this worried? I guess we shall see in later issues. Now leave and don't show up in another social event you are not directly invited to before your daughter is ready to apologize to us." The Queen declared.
"NO! This is your fault Penelope! You! You took Eloise! You got everything I've always wanted! It's not fair! YOU do not get to be happy! You do no deserve to be engaged to a Bridgerton of all people! You do not get to make up with Eloise! if I can't have her, then no one will!" Cressida screamed at the top of her lungs, pointing to Pen and Eloise in turn, looking completely deranged.
In her rage, Cressida threw the empty glass of lemonade at Eloise, in full force and, seeing it arrive, Pen pushed Eloise to the side and the glass ended up breaking on Penelope's head, cutting her.
"Penelope!" her family exclaimed.
"You're bleeding!" Colin said, worried as he took the handkerchief her mother handed him to press against her head.
The Queen had ordered the Cowper removed from the grounds, informing them that their daughter was to remain locked in their house until her fate was decided. Royal guards would stay at the door. They were now under house arrest until a decision was made.
Penelope was guided under the Queen's tent so that she could be checked out by a doctor. Once it was said that it wasn't too bad and would heal quickly, she was invited by the Queen to rest by her side for a while, which Pen happily agreed to, because she did have a headache.
Around her was the Queen, Brimsley and Colin. Everyone else was out of ear shot.
"And here I thought finding a moment to speak with you would be a difficult task. Apparently all it took was wait for Cressida to attack me." Pen half joked.
"You wished to speak with me, miss Featherington?" The Queen asked.
"Now Pen? Are you sure?" Colin asked her, still worried about the small cut she had in her hair.
"No time like the present." She nodded with a smile.
"You have me curious." The Queen smiled.
"I am Lady Whistledown. Of course this was not planned, so I do not have the draft of the next issue with me but that can be arranged later." Penelope replied in a low voice.
"You? Of course, it all makes sense now. You were, until recent weeks, a wallflower. You could hear everything, people did not notice you." The Queen smiled.
"And you have no idea the sort of things people would freely speak of in front of me." She shook her head.
"I still do not understand how you were so invisible to everyone. You were never invisible to me." Colin shook his head.
"Maybe because you looked at her with the eyes of love." The Queen smiled softly.
"I can prove it by describing this event in Lady Whistledown fashion if you wish, your Majesty." Pen offered and the Queen nodded.
"Dearest Gentle Reader, it seems that Miss Cowper is lost so far up her own egotistical self that she believes everything is owed to her simply by existing and that she doesn't owe any of us an apology. Of course her father tried to apologize in her stead, but it seemed to come from fear and not sincerity, did it not? Would you forgive and let go or, like Miss Featherington, would you simply ignore and pity? Although she doesn't know how to apologize or recognize when she is in the wrong, we have to give this to Miss Cowper: she can aim. Indeed, Miss Featherington was probably not expecting the glass Miss Cowper expertly threw at her friend's head but she did protect miss Bridgerton from it and ended up injured herself. Something that seemed to please Miss Cowper for apparently others being engaged and happy is a true crime in Miss Cowper's mind. Let us hope she recovers well. On to other matter dear readers, you can all stop your investigation for I have met with the Queen. Her Majesty now knows who I am and the ransom is not yours to win anymore." Penelope spoke, once again amazing Colin by doing it so naturally.
"Now, I do have questions." The Queen declared with a smile.
"If you are wondering why I taunt you or criticize you regularly your Majesty, let me explain, please. I have to be believable. If I praised you all the time, people would not take me seriously, they would doubt my sincerity and the truth of my words. But if I criticize you on little things, when it counts, I can truly be on your side and people would follow. If I could take customers away from the new modiste and back to Madame Delacroix in one sentence last season, imagine what I can do now." Penelope explained.
"This is very smart reasoning." The Queen complimented.
"I try." Penelope replied before she winced in pain.
"What's wrong? What do you need? Do I need to get the doctor back?" Colin asked immediatly.
"Calm down, it's just the cut. Maybe you could get me something cold to drink? Please?" She asked him and he nodded and ran off.
"Do you plan on continuing writing after the wedding?" The Queen asked her.
"I was planning on stopping, because My mother told me that a married woman's dreams had to be her husband's and only her husband's dreams. But Colin says that this is part of who I am and he wants me to continue." Penelope smiled.
"Good, because I would miss it." The Queen smiled.
"There might be fewer issues at times, but I shall do my best to keep at least one issue a week." Penelope promised.
"Good, now, care to tell your queen what is the gossip you have on the Cowpers?" The Queen asked.
"Honestly? Nothing yet, your Majesty. It was bluff to scare them, because even if they did not apologize, watching them scared is enjoyable." Penelope replied, making the Queen laugh.
"It truly is, isn't it?" She nodded.
"Plus, people will talk about it now, and we might start hearing things. A man like him doesn't grow to that much money so quickly by going by the rules. I am certain that there is something to find there. If you have your investigators looking into it, i'm willing to bet they will find something illegal there, otherwise he would not have been so eager to apologize." Penelope explained just as Colin came back with a glass of Lemonade and ice cream.
"The lemonade isn't that cold anymore so I got you some ice cream in case you really wanted something cold." He told her gently as he handed her both.
"Ah, true love... So adorable. Miss Featherington, I shall invite you for tea after your honeymoon, when you take callers once more. I do believe that this is the beginning of a good friendship. Do not worry, I shall keep your secret and I will not ask you to publish things you do not want to publish." The Queen smiled.
"And when I end up taunting you, just know that I do not mean it." Penelope smiled back.
"Of course, and I ask of you to not take it easy on my in the future just because I know. I do enjoy our little games." The Queen asked and Penelope nodded.
"It is quite enjoyable, isn't it?"
"It break the boredom." The Queen nodded.
After some time, Penelope felt better and they left the queen to join their families, who wanted to make sure she was alright.
"I'm fine, it's a spot that bleeds easily, but it heals quickly. I will just have to be careful not to open it again when I brush my hair." She explained.
"You spoke a lot with the Queen, what did you speak about? She seemed pleased." Portia asked her daughter.
"She charmed her of course! Her Majesty told Pen to expect an invitation to tea after our honeymoon." Colin replied with a large prideful smile.
Penelope did not know if she would truly make it her mission to track every single mistake made by the Cowper family, maybe just for a little while, but how could she hold a grudge for long when she finally felt like she was blessed. Cressida had never been kind, and obviously she never would be, but she had been able to forgive, to an extend, her own sisters for the same cruel remarks after all.
Sure, Cressida hurt her in public, so maybe she did deserve to remain on her list a moment. She'd decide later, for now, she was happy, with her future husband and her family.
Once again, I apologize for not writing Lady Whistledown right, just pretend it's believable ;-)
Please leave a review, I do love reading them and I answer. Sometimes reviews inspire more stories, or new chapters.
Lorelei Candice Black