Chapter 4 – A Life in Pieces
In the early morning hours, late into the summer, Jennifer comes stumbling back to her grandfather's lodge. The way she was walking you would think she was drunk. Jennifer could not walk straight, and she would stumble to the ground. Her clothes were dirty and a little torn, her hair looked like she slept in it. She had bruising and scrapes on her face and arms.
Aaron was sitting on the porch waiting for his granddaughter to return home. Beside him were two garbage bags and a backpack that Jen would use when camping with Cody. "Where have you been girl?"
"Out," Jennifer said.
"Where?" Aaron sternly asked.
"With friends," Jennifer said.
"Friends do that to you?" Aaron asked.
Jennifer started having tears in her eyes, "Grandpa I am tired, and I don't feel well. Can we talk later."
"Girl, you have decided to act like an adult, do adult things. So, you can experience adult consequences for your actions."
"What are you saying grandpa?" Jennifer asked, confused.
"Stop calling me Grandpa. I am no longer your grandfather and I no longer have a granddaughter. As far as I am concerned my granddaughter died with her parents six years ago."
"What…. Grandpa, please. Don't do this, please," Jennifer started to cry. She falls to her knees begging her grandfather. "Please Grandpa!"
Aaron got up and picked up the bags, throwing them off the porch.
"What is in those bags?" Jennifer asked.
"Your stuff. You are no longer welcome here. I want you off my property, NOW!" Aaron said. He walked into the lodge and locked the door.
Jennifer quickly followed him. She was crying and tried to open the door. She could not open it, so she started to bang on the door. "Grandpa please, let me in. Please Grandpa. I am so sorry. I am sorry about everything. Please Grandpa let me in. I am sorry."
Aaron opened the door, holding a shot gun. "I want you gone now; I don't ever want to see your face on my property again. Your parents' trust will still pay for your schooling. I suggest you make the most of it and do not waste it. Because you are not welcome here anymore." Aaron shut the door.
"Grandpa that is two weeks away. Where am I supposed to go? Please I will be good, please don't do this to me."
"You are an adult now. You choose to do adult things with adult men. You just have to figure it out for yourself." Aaron said with anger.
Jennifer looked at Aaron who was staring at her through the window. Knowing how stubborn he was. She got up shaking, grabbed her bags and started walking away. She walked around the lake, far enough she be out of the eye sight of her grandfather. She got cleaned up as she shook. She stared at a small fire she built to get warm. Jennifer curled up in the fetal position and cried herself to sleep.
Ten days later Jennifer made her way to the ranger station. She spotted Marco and James and hung back so they would not see her. Jennifer had tears welled up in her eyes and her hands began to shake. The two got on their horses and rode off. When Jennifer got up, she immediately felt sick and threw up. She got her stuff and walked to Robin and Matt's cottage. Before she left the tree line, she saw Matt leave and head to the ranger station. Once he was out of sight Jennifer made her way to the cottage. She knocked on the door, "Please be here."
Robin opened the door. "Jen, what is wrong?"
"Can I come in, please?" Jennifer asked. She looked disheveled and unkept. The bruising and scratches on her face were disappearing, but still visible. It was obvious that Jennifer had not showered in some time.
"Of course," Robin let Jennifer in.
As soon as Jennifer walked in the door one of the garbage bags broke and her clothes spilled out. "Jen, is that your clothes?" Jennifer was on the floor scrambling to get her stuff. Robin asked, "Jen, honey what is going on? What happened?" Robin asked.
"I don't want to talk about it," Jennifer had tears in her eyes. "Can you still take me to school?"
"Of course, sweetie, but we have a few days." Robin said.
"Oh, I guess I lost track of what day it was," Jennifer looked lost and started to fidget. "Ah...hmm... ah. Can I stay until then. I won't cause any trouble, I promise."
"Don't you want to spend some time with your grandfather before you leave?" Robin asked.
"I…. I can't go back," Jennifer said.
Robin noticed that Jennifer had been eyeing her breakfast.
"Are you hungry?" Robin asked. Jennifer nodded yes. "I was just about to eat breakfast. Why don't you have my plate, and I will make another."
Jennifer sat down at the table and started shoveling the food in her mouth. Robin made some extra and gave Jennifer more. Jennifer shoveled it down too. Robin could tell that Jennifer looked emotionally beaten and tired.
"Why don't you go upstairs and take a shower. You can stay in the bedroom on the right. When you are done with the shower, why don't you take a nap, things will look better after you get some rest."
"Robin, thank you," Jennifer said.
"Here are some towels and something to change into," Robin handed them to Jennifer, and she went upstairs and took a shower.
Robin called Matt, "Miss me already?" Matt asked.
"Matt, are you alone?"
"Yeah," Matt answered.
"Jen is here, she does not look good," Robin said.
"Did she say what happened?" Matt asked.
"No, she did not want to talk about it. I don't think she has eaten in a while. She was starving, I gave her my breakfast and she gobbled it down. She looks like she has not taken a shower or slept in a week. I am really scared for her. She has some bruising on her face and arms. They are faded but there. Don't say anything to anyone, but I need to stay with her today. Oh… I got to go... she is done in the shower, talk later." Robin said as she hung up the phone.
Jennifer slept for several hours. Matt came and went, and Jennifer was still asleep. Robin went upstairs to check on Jennifer. Jennifer was in bed crying. Robin crawled into bed, laid next to her, and held her.
"I messed everything up," Jennifer cried.
"It's going to be okay, honey. You are going to be okay," Robin tried to comfort her.
"Robin please don't say anything to Matt. I don't want him to think differently of me," Jennifer said.
"Whatever we talked about will stay between us," Robin comforted her.
"I don't want to talk about it," Jennifer said.
"It's okay. If you are hungry, come down stairs. I will make you something to eat. Matt is not here. He is on a scouting trip for a couple of days. So, it is just the two of us." Robin said.
After a while, Jennifer came down stairs. "Jennifer, are you hungry?"
"Robin… something is wrong. I am not feeling well." Jennifer is sweating and she cried in pain.
"Where does it hurt?" Robin asked.
"My stomach, it really hurts," Jennifer screamed.
"I am taking you to the hospital," Robin said. Robin helped Jennifer to the car, and she took her to the hospital.
Jennifer is in exam room; Robin was sitting next to her. The nurse asked. "Can you tell me the date of your last period."
Jennifer looked bewildered, "I…. I… don't remember."
The nurse was annoyed, "Just a ball park."
"ah… maybe two or three months ago," Jennifer looked over to Robin and then down.
"Ma'am, maybe you should step out," the nurse said to Robin.
"Do you want me to go?" Robin asked.
Jennifer had tears running down her face and nodded yes.
"Okay, I will be in the waiting room if you need me." Robin got up and hugged Jennifer.
Once Robin left the nurse asked Jennifer, "Any chance you could be pregnant?" Jennifer just looked at the nurse, staring at her. "Miss Jacobs, are you sexually active, could there be a possibility that you are pregnant?"
Jennifer just nodded yes. Jennifer is crying and screamed as she was in pain again. The doctor came in the room. Miss Jacobs, let me take a look at you. "Where does it hurt?" Jennifer was holding her abdomen. "Is the pain constant?"
"No, it comes and goes," Jennifer said.
"You told the nurse you had not had your period in two or three months and that you are sexually active. Did you use protection every time?" the doctor said.
Jennifer responded in a whisper, "No."
"We are going to give you a pregnancy test and a proper exam. But if my hutch is right, I think you are having a miscarriage."
"Can my friend come back?" Jennifer asked.
"Of course," the doctor nodded to the nurse and Robin came back into the room.
"Okay, Miss Jacobs, we need you to put your legs in the stirrups and let me take a look." The doctor looked down between Jennifer's legs. "Oh… It looks like you may have just had a miscarriage. I am sorry Miss Jacobs." Jennifer just started crying harder. Robin started to hold her. "I will give you a few minutes."
The doctor walked out of the room. "Jennifer, you will be okay. Who is the father?"
"I don't want to talk about him. Robin please don't make me talk about it."
"We should tell your grandfather. He would want to know." Robin said.
"No, he can't ever know. Please don't say anything to him or Matt. Please, Robin." Jennifer asked.
"I won't say anything, it is your story to tell. But I think you should tell him." Robin comforted Jennifer.
The doctor came back in. "Miss Jacobs. We need to do an examination to make sure when you had the miscarriage that everything came out. We will be giving you an ultra sound. It won't hurt. It will just be a little cold. Do you understand." Jennifer nodded yes. "Okay we will get started. Just try to relax. I am going to place some jelly on your abdomen, it will be little cold to the touch." Jennifer jumped a little. "Just try to relax. I am going to use this device to look at your uterus." The doctor is moving the device around Jennifer's abdomen and watching the screen. "Everything is looking good. Okay Miss Jacobs, I want you to make a follow-up appointment with your OBGYN in about weeks from now."
"I don't have one," Jennifer said.
"We can give you some recommendations," the Doctor said.
"I am leaving for college in a couple of days. Would you have any recommendations in the San Francisco area?" Jennifer asked.
"I can certainly get some for you. Next 24 to 48 hours I want you to take it easy. Okay?" Jennifer nodded yes to the doctor. "If you feel any sharp pains or heavier bleeding, I want you to come right back to the ER. Either here or when you are at school. I suggest you don't have any intercourse for at least two weeks. It would be better if you waited longer. I also suggest you may want to go on the pill, so you don't have any unplan pregnancies. Always tell your sexual partners they must wear a condom and ask if they have been tested for and if they have any STDs or AIDS. Any questions?" Jennifer shook her head no. "Okay you can get dressed and check out at the desk."
After the examination Robin brought Jennifer back home. "Honey are you hungry?"
"No… I am just tired. Can you stay with me for a bit? I don't want to be alone right now." Jennifer asked.
"I just put clean sheets on this morning and Matt won't be back for a few days. Why don't you lay down on my bed. Here some clean pj's for you to put on." Jennifer laid down on the bed and Robin just held her.
"Was this pregnancy planned?" Robin asked.
"No, I did not even know I was pregnant." Jennifer said.
"Do you know who the father was?" Robin asked.
"Yes," Jennifer said.
"Do you think you should tell him? If he cares for you, he will want to know."
"He said he cared for me, that he loved me," Jennifer said.
"I am sure he does, sweetie you should tell him," Robin said.
"No, he never did. He lied. I heard him," Jennifer said as she cried "I heard him brag to his friends that he got the little mountain girl to do whatever he wanted. He had me over and over. One word from him and I would sleep with his friends too."
"Did you?" Robin asked.
"No… I thought he loved me," Jennifer said with tears. "After I heard, I lashed out at him."
"Then what happened?" Robin asked.
"He grabbed me and told me I was a slut and not worth his time. He was bored with me and was handing me over to his friend." Jennifer said.
"Jen, is that how you got the bruises and cuts?"
"Yes," Jennifer said through the tears.
"Did they hurt you in anyway after that?" Robin asked.
"No, I managed to pick up a rock, I hit him over the head. I was able to get away and I ran home," Jennifer said.
"When did this happen?" Robin asked.
"Hmmm maybe ten days ago," Jennifer said.
"Why did you come here instead of staying home?" Robin asked.
"I told him I was sorry, but he…he… did not want to hear it," Jennifer said.
"Jen, were you wondering the mountains by yourself?" Robin asked.
"Yes, since that night," Jennifer said with a whisper.
"I am glad you came here. You're always welcome here, I want you to know that," Robin said.
Jennifer nodded her head and fell asleep.
The next day Jennifer slept on and off. Robin went into the ranger station to work for a bit. She also looked up the medical log. She had stitched up a cut on Marco's forehead recently from a cut he got. He said he had fallen and hit his head on some rocks. She looked back to see how long ago it happened. She realized it was about ten days earlier. "Oh … Shit... Shit…. No…No it can't be." Robin could not believe it. It was a ranger that hurt that little girl so badly. Marco was a bit of a creep and womanizer, but she never thought he would go after a young girl that way. Why would he have chosen Jen of all people? How did he even know her? When did they even meet? The Rangers hardly ever went to Aaron's Lodge. All these questions were swirling around Robin's mind.
Robin returned to the cabin and checked on Jen who was sleeping again. Robin curled up in bed and just held Jen. "I am so sorry; I don't know how we missed it."
Later that evening, Robin and Jennifer were eating dinner. "Since tomorrow will be your last day in Tahoe for a while, is there anywhere special you would like to go?"
"No, I would rather stay here," Jennifer said.
"Do you have everything you need for school? Bedding, Towels, toiletries, or school supplies?" Robin asked.
"I don't know," Jennifer said.
"Jen, you are going to be okay. Now I have a couple of old suit cases you can have to put your stuff in. They were Cody's. His mom insisted in getting him new ones for graduation. These were in good enough shape so he wanted us to save them for you in case you did not have any."
"Thank you," Jennifer said.
Robin and Jennifer went through Jennifer's bags. Robin took inventory of things that Jennifer had. In the backpack were all Jennifer's legal documents.
"I was thinking, maybe we go a day early and we could set up an appointment with your trust fund manager, set up a checking account for you, see if we can get you set up with student services so you can see a counselor, make sure you get set-up with a doctor for your follow up appointments which is very important. Then on to the fun part, shopping and we can get everything you need for school."
"How will I pay for it? I don't have anything." Jennifer asked.
"Don't worry about it, we will figure it out," Robin said.
"Okay," Jen said.
In the morning, Jennifer and Robin packed up Jennifer's things and headed out to San Francisco. Jennifer was still down; she did not really want to leave. If she could stay in the bedroom in the cottage forever, she would. As they were pulling out of the ranger station. James spotted the two ladies in the truck; he saw how sad and distant Jennifer looked. He started feeling guilty about everything that happened between Marco and Jennifer. He witnessed and participated in most of it. He was high and had been drinking when he was coming on to Jennifer after Marco handed her off. Jennifer clearly did not want it and she ran off. They had not seen her since that night. He had wanted to apologize to her and was trying to find a way to distance himself from Marco.
After Robin helped Jennifer get settled at school the two went out for one more dinner before Robin headed back to Tahoe. "Robin, I know I have screwed up, I made a mess of my life. Thank you for not pushing me away too. I don't know what I would have done if it was not for you. Thank you so much."
"Jen, you have a chance to start over here. No one knows you or your past. You can become whatever you want. You can make friends, go out with boys your own age. Have a life. Leave Tahoe behind you. Make sure you keep up with your doctor's appointments and with the counselor. I know you did not know you were pregnant, and you were not planning on it. But you had a big loss, you may not realize it, but it will affect you in ways you don't know. But every day it will get easier. I have been there too, and it does get easier over time. If you ever need to talk or need to get away, just call me. I am here for you. You are always welcome to stay with Matt and I."
"Robin, thank you," Jennifer said.
Back at the ranger station James knocks on Matt's door, "Boss, can we talk?"
"Yeah, come have a seat. I am surprised you are not out with Marco?" Matt said. Matt did not know what had happened to Jennifer.
"Yeah… well, he is what I wanted to talk about. First, I want to turn in my resignation and a formal statement of what I am about to tell you. After you hear what I am going to say, you will fire me. So, I am going to save you the time and effort," James said.
"What are you talking about?" Matt asked.
"Marco has never been a fan of your family, ever since you took command again. I not sure why honestly. But he had wanted to under mind your command. When we were at your wedding he spotted your brother with the young lady, with Jen. He asked around and found out that Jen and her grandfather were close to your family. So, he thought what perfect way to get to your family than to go through that innocent girl. Did not take much to strike up a friendship with her. Her grandfather did not like it. But I think she was lonely. Marco likes to party; he dragged her along. He would get her drunk and or high and he take advantage of her."
Matt piped in, "He was sleeping with her?"
James admitted, "Yeah. He did not stop there. He pushed her to steal for him, damage property, I don't know what else. She was picked up by the cops a few times. She was never charged, the sheriff just brought her home and let her grandfather deal with her."
"How did he think this was going to hurt my family?" Matt asked.
"I am not sure, but he hurt that little girl, and I can't just stand-by and say nothing anymore." James said.
"What made you come to this conclusion?" Matt asked.
"Little over two weeks ago Marco told her he did not want to see her anymore. That it was my turn with her. I… I was a bit drunk and maybe a little high. She was not interested in me, and she pushed me off. She lashed out at Marco, and he hit her. He was hurting her, she managed to get a rock and hit him over the head. She ran into the woods. I felt guilty about that night, and I went to her grandfather's lodge a few days later to apologize. Aaron said Jen did not live there anymore and I was not welcome back. Then a few days ago, I saw Robin and Jen drive away in Robin's truck. That little girl that was so sweet and innocent a couple of years ago was broken. He destroyed her. I had to say something."
Matt went and punched James in the face.
Next day Robin came home and entered the cottage. Robin saw Matt and immediately ran to him and hugged him. And he held her tight. "I missed you."
"Babe, I missed you too. How did it go with Jen?" Matt asked.
"Matt…. Oh Matt. I want to tell you, but she did not want me to say anything to you." Robin said.
"Well, I think I may know most of it," Matt said.
"You do, how?" Robin asked.
"James came to me and told me what has been going on with Jen. It was Marco, wasn't it?" Matt asked.
"Oh Matt… she would not say, but I am pretty sure it was. How could he…. how could a ranger under your command do something like that," Robin cried in Matt's arms.
"I don't know…I just don't know," Matt comforted Robin.