Chapter 23: Unbearable Pain
Another two years went by and they celebrated Alex's 5th birthday. Kelly was there with her boyfriend Ben, Jasper, now 14, was excited to celebrate with his little cousin. Matt and Robin were never able to have that third child. Robin just adored Alex. Cody and Lizzie were expecting baby number two. Lizzie was seven months along and they were very excited. Josh was doing very well at the ranger station. Alex blew out his candles after he made a wish.
Next day Robin was going to watch Alex for the day, while Lizzie was going to take care of some errands. Cody was on duty and had to fly the chopper out to a secluded area in the mountains. Cody and Samantha were trying to track down some lost skiers. The chopper broke down and they reported it back to the ranger station. A group of rangers had to go out and pick them up.
Lizzie walked into the bank, not knowing it was being held up. One of the robbers turned and looked at Lizzie as she entered. Lizzie gasped and the robber shot her multiple times. Lizzie was dead before her body hit the ground. The robbers immediately took the money they got and ran out of the building.
A couple of hours later the sheriff's car pulled into the ranger station. A couple of deputies walked over to the front desk.
"Can I help you officers?" Josh asked.
"We are looking for Cody Hawkes, is he around?" the Officer inquired.
"He is out on a call, is there something I can help you with?" Josh asked.
Josh could tell the officer looked upset. He knew that Cody knew both. "Do you know when he will be returning?"
"They had an issue with the chopper, so the crew is going out to get them, but he probably won't be back until late tonight," Josh said and was getting worried.
"Is Robin or Matt around?" Officer asked.
"Robin is off today, but Matt is in the back office. Let me get him." Josh said.
"No, I know the way. I will go back," the Officer said. The two officers went to the back office and knocked on the office door.
"Nick and Charlie, good to see you, what can I do for you." Matt said.
"Matt I am afraid we have some bad news. I understand that Cody is unreachable now…." The officer paused as he took a deep breath.
"What is it, Charlie?" Matt said with concern.
"Today the First National Bank was held up. Lizzie walked into the bank at the wrong time and the robbers shot her multiple times and killed her. She died Immediately."
"No... no!" Matt screamed. He fell to the ground crying. Josh went running into the room and saw Matt on the ground. Matt looked up, "And the baby?"
"The baby did not survive either," the officer was on the ground next to Matt.
"Lizzie?" Josh said.
"She gone," Matt cried.
Josh ran out of the ranger station; he could not believe what he had just heard. He ran to the barn and screamed and fell to the ground crying. Samantha walked into Josh tearing the place apart. "Josh what is wrong?"
"Lizzie is dead," Josh fell to the ground crying. Samantha went to Josh and held him as he cried.
Samantha got Josh to calm down and the two of them walked back to the ranger station. Matt had collected himself at this point. "I am going to the morgue with the two officers to Identify her body. Don't say anything to Cody or don't say anything on the radio. I don't want anyone telling him until I talk to him. Any word from them, please call me right away. If no word. I am going to go home and tell Robin. Samantha, can you please stay here with Josh. I don't think he will be able to go on."
Matt was in the car with the officers, "This is on the news, isn't it?"
"I imagine so," the officer said.
"Take me home, I don't want Robin, the kids and especially Alex to see it. You don't have to stay; I can drive down to the morgue afterwards."
Matt walked into his house, as soon as Robin looked at Matt, she knew something was wrong. Matt motioned for Robin to go outside. He told her the news and she immediately collapsed. Kelly had been outside, and they did not realize it. She heard the whole thing. "Daddy, it can't be true, we just saw her this morning, she should be back any moment. Daddy no."
"Kelly, come here," Matt just held his wife and daughter.
"Does Cody know?" Robin asked.
"No, he is out on a rescue and does not know." Matt said.
"Do we tell Alex, or do we wait?" Robin asked.
"I think wait; Cody should tell him. We need to keep the TV off." Matt said.
"Daddy, how do we act like nothing happened?" Kelly said.
"We have to be strong for him. Is he with Jasper?" Matt asked.
"Yes, I think they are playing with Lego's in Jasper's room," Robin said.
Back at the ranger station, the sun had gone down, and the rangers finally returned. Commander Wilson, Smitty, a new ranger, and Cody returned. None of them had a clue what had transpired. They walked into the ranger station. Josh, Samantha and Matt were all sitting quietly waiting for them in the dark with just a light by the front desk. Cody had not even noticed the three of them.
"Thanks for the lift. I may just make it home to put Alex to bed," Cody said.
Wilson came in, "Matt, what are you doing here. Looks like someone died in here."
Cody stopped in his tracks, Matt got up quietly and walked over to Cody, Matt nearly lost it. "Cody, can we talk outside."
The look on Matt's face he knew something was wrong immediately. "Matt what is it?" He looked over and saw Samantha, he could see she was crying. Josh saw Cody and one look at him, Josh got up and ran out of the ranger station. "Matt what is it, you're scaring me."
"Guys can you leave us." Matt looked around to the others. They left the room.
"Cody, I don't know how to tell you this," Matt said.
Cody's eyes were filling with tears. "What is it, Matt?"
"There was a bank robbery in town today. Lizzie walked in at the wrong time," Matt said.
"No! No!" Cody immediately fell to the ground. "No! Not Lizzie, No Matt."
"I am so sorry, little brother, she is gone" Matt said. He held Cody for as long as he needed.
"And the baby?" Cody asked.
"They are both gone, I am so sorry," Matt said.
"And Alex?" Cody barely got the words out.
"He is fine, sleeping at my house." Matt said.
"Does he know?" Cody asked.
"No, I wanted you to know first. Robin and Kelly both know," Matt said.
"I want to see her, Matt she can't be gone," Cody said.
"I can take you to her," Matt said calmly.
Matt and Cody drove down to the morgue. The corner pulled the body out for them to see. Cody went up to her. His hands were shaking, he brushed the hair off her face. "Hey beautiful. Lizzie, I love you so much. I can't believe you are gone. Baby I love you. I don't know how I will go on without you." Cody kissed Lizzie one more time on her lips. He looked up. "And the baby?"
"I am sorry sir, the baby took a direct hit and died almost instantly. We left the baby in the womb," the coroner said.
Cody was shaking, he unzipped the bag some more to reveal her belly. And put his hands on Lizzie's belly. "Baby girl, your daddy loves you very much and wishes he could have met you. Your mommy will be with you always" Cody kissed Lizzie's belly like he did so many times. "Lizzie, take care of our baby girl. I love you both." Cody ran out of the room, fell to the ground and wailed.
"Thank you, sir," Matt ran out of the room and held his brother.
Matt drove Cody back to his house. Cody was numb, before they walked in. "how am I going to tell Alex and Lizzie's parents."
"Robin called them already, they will be here tomorrow or the next day," Matt said.
Cody and Matt walked in the front door. Kelly and Robin were still up. Kelly ran over to Cody right away and hugged Cody, and he held her tight. "Where is Alex?"
"He is upstairs sleeping in the guest room," Robin said.
Kelly let go of Cody and Cody made his way up stairs and to the guest room. He opened the door and could see Alex sound asleep. Cody crawled in bed with him and held his son. Cody was exhausted and just fell asleep next to him. Early next morning Alex woke up and woke Cody up with his stirring. "Hi daddy, I love you."
"Hey little man," Cody said. Almost forgetting what happened for a second.
"Where is Mommy?" Alex looked around the room.
Cody sat up and sat at the edge of the bed. "Mommy is gone."
"Gone where?" Alex asked.
"Mommy went to heaven yesterday," Cody said.
"When is she coming back?" Alex asked
"I am afraid she is not coming back, she died," Cody held his son.
"Mommy!" Alex cried. Cody held Alex in his arms tightly. They both cried. "I want Mommy."
"I know son, I want mommy too."
Next few days were a blur for Cody. Robin stepped up and watched over Alex and comforted him. Lizzie's family came and they mourned with Cody and Alex. Her parents were just devastated. Jackie and Pete were there. Mark with his wife. Josh was hardly holding it together. The funeral came. Many of Lizzie's family, friends, co-workers from the forestry department in Tahoe and Rangers from Yellowstone talked. Mark told stories of when Cody and Lizzie first met and their courtship, he could barely get through it. Cody just staired. He looks at Alex and he would hold his son. And when Cody couldn't do it, Robin was right there with him. At the burial Mark had to help Cody back to his truck. Robin was carrying Alex. They all went back to the ranger station for the luncheon. Cody sat outside for a long time before Mark brought him in. Jackie left shortly after the funeral. Mark stayed a few days to help Cody, but then had to leave. Lizzie's parents stayed a month to help Cody get settled and figure out what to do next and go through her things.
Cody went back to work. He would be staying on the radio for a few weeks, to get into the groove of things. Commander Wilson did not think Cody was ready, but Matt insisted it was better for Cody to get back to work. Matt was afraid Cody would not be able to hold it together otherwise.
A call came into the station, "High Mountain Ranger's how can I help you?" Cody answered. There is a pause for a bit. "We will send a crew right over."
"Josh and Smitty. There is a report of an avalanche near Crow Creek Canyon. There are some injured skiers" Cody said. Commander Wilson watched and thought maybe he was wrong about Cody. He seemed to be just fine.
Hour or so later, Josh and Smitty called in to give status update, "Wingman to Base come back Base." Cody just sat there staring outward and not hearing it. "Wingman to Base come back."
It went on for a few minutes and Cody never heard it. Samantha walked in, she went over and picked up the mic and responded back. "Base to Wingman, over." Josh gave an update to Samantha.
Cody finally looked up at Samantha. "Are you okay, Cody?" Samantha asked.
Commander Wilson walked into the room, "Cody I think we need to talk." Cody got up and went to Commander Wilson's office. "Samantha, take Jeremy with you. Give me status update when you are done." Samantha nodded and Wilson followed Cody back to his office.
Sometime later back at Cody's apartment. Lizzie's parents, Matt, and Robin were with Cody, "I really appreciate you guys coming and helping. Being here with us. I know it must be hard for you as well." Cody said.
"Cody were are phone call away and will be here anytime you need us," Lizzie's mom said.
"We will be too," Robin said. "Anytime."
"I have made a decision; I thought about this long and hard. I am a single dad now. And I need to think about how best I can take care of Alex. I love being a ranger, but the hours are unpredictable, and the work is dangerous. With the job you need to keep your head on straight and not let outside things distract you, especially as a chopper pilot. I am distracted, so my job is not safe for me or anyone I am working with. I have tried and it is not going well. Alex needs to have one parent and I need to make him the priority. This morning, I gave Commander Wilson my resignation effective immediately.
"What are you going to do to support you and Alex?" Lizzie's father asked.
"There will be the money from her life insurance policy and the Beehives. She taught me everything I will need to do. Alex and I are going to move up to the cabin. So, we won't have living expensive and mortgage or rent. She loved it up there and we dreamed of living their full time. I know she would want us to move up there." Cody said.
"What about school for Alex, he starts kindergarten next year." Matt asked.
"I can home school him, like dad home schooled me. Lots of kids are home schooled." Cody said.
"What about the social aspects Cody. Did you think this all out," Matt asked.
"Matt, I grew up there and turned out fine. I cannot stay in Tahoe and drive pass that bank and see where she was taken from me. I just can't. The cabin is where we need to go. There are so many more resources now than when I was a kid. He will be fine." Matt and Robin just looked at each other. Worried for Cody and Alex.
"If that is what you want son, we will support the two of you. But we hope you will still be a part of our family and come for visits," Lizzie's mom said.
"We will be there., I want Alex to know as much as he can about his mom. l know he is little, and his memories of his mom will fade. We will have each other, and we will get thru it."
With that Cody and Alex moved up to the Cabin that Jesse raised Cody.
Three months later Cody and Alex came down from the mountain to visit Matt's family. Cody left Alex with his Aunt Robin. Cody went down to the cemetery and visited Lizzie's grave for the first time. He had a bouquet of flowers in his hands that he placed in a planter by her headstone. Then he sat down in front of the grave stone. Good morning my love. Lizzie. Even sitting here, I still can't believe you are gone. The last three months have been unbearable without you." Cody paused for a bit and cried. He laid down in the fetal position. He cried until he had no more tears and fell asleep. He woke up some time later. He looked around and he was still alone. He felt as if Lizzie was there with him. A feeling he never wanted to lose. "Lizzie, my love, I hope you don't mind. I named the baby Emily. I did not want the headstone to read baby girl Hawkes. I wanted her to have a proper name. I know you really wanted Emily, so I figured you would not object. Can you believe I left the rangers and became a full-time dad. I am working your beehives and will be home schooling Alex. We have moved up to the cabin full time. I feel like my dad is there with us from time to time. I hope you both are looking over us. I need your strength to go on. I love you Lizzie and I will until the day I die. Goodbye for now my love. I will be back as often as I can." With that Cody kissed the headstone, placed his hands over her name. he got up and walked away.
The end
Author's comments: The story continues with "A Ranger's Return (aka Thru the Darkness). I hope you have enjoyed this story as much as I have enjoyed writing it. I originally wrote "A Ranger's Return" So, few things have changed. I have made those adjustments already. There will be new content coming in the 2nd half of 2024 to "A Ranger's Return". I will post them as I complete each chapter.