The next morning, much as he would have liked to, Hank hadn't stayed for breakfast at Kalinda's place. She had joked about that being a good thing because she had nothing to feed him anyway.
Returning home, Hank didn't have much time to quickly eat something and get ready for work. The first thing he noted upon entering the house was the smell of coffee. For that reason, he headed straight for the kitchen. Sure enough, Erin was there at the table, drinking coffee and eating toast.
"Hey," she said with a knowing smile. "Good night?"
"It was. Listen, Erin, I've not got long but there's something important I want to say to you."
"Alright," she said warily, putting her cup down on the table as if bracing herself.
"I've not been the best father to you. In fact before you moved to New York we had ended up more like boss and employee than father and daughter. I want to do better. I want us both to do better. It would be nice if I could... be a father to you," he said awkwardly. He wasn't happy with the way he had concluded. This kind of conversation felt foreign to him. There was more he had wanted to say too. The words simply hadn't come to him.
Erin looked surprised, in a good way. "I'd like that too. A lot. Things seemed to get broken when Camille passed, and they never recovered. As you said, we could both do better. It means a lot to me that you still want to... well, you know."
Hank understood her awkwardness. Erin had never called him dad. He had never called her his daughter. Maybe that was something that should change too? One thing at a time, he told himself.
"I've got to get ready for work, Erin. Dinner tonight?"
She smiled. "I'd like that. Will you invite Kalinda?"
"No. Just you and me would be nice. Besides, she'll be busy cleaning her apartment." His plan was to tell Erin over dinner that he was going to offer her the job with Intelligence. Having left it a few days since their argument over it, he felt a little less sore about losing face.
Erin raised an eyebrow. "You know you could hep her with that?"
"Somehow dinner with you sounds more appealing than cleaning."
She laughed. "Alright then, I'll make something. Steak?"
"That'll work. I've got to go change."
"I'll fix you some toast and a coffee while you do that. You can have breakfast before you leave." To Hank her tone sounded more like his mother than his daughter, but he recognised that her heart was in the right place. She was trying. That was what it was going to take from both of them in order to rebuild their relationship.
"Thank you," he said on his way out of the kitchen.
Ten minutes later, Hank had taken a wash and changed his clothes ready for work. Returning to the kitchen, he found the promised coffee and toast waiting for him.
"There you are," Erin said. "Have a good day. I'm going to take my shower."
"Erin," he said, stopping her before she reached the doorway. She turned to look at him. "When Camille died, I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry for that." It was hard to say, very hard, but he meant it sincerely.
Erin continued to look at him for a moment, seeming unsure how to react. Eventually she gave him a small nod of acknowledgement and hurried away. Hank had hoped for more than that. He supposed she had found it tough to process what he had said.
After rushing the toast and chugging down the coffee, Hank headed out to work feeling pretty good about himself, and about life in general. That was something he figured he could get used to if given the chance.
By the time Hank entered the Intelligence bullpen he had put the pleasant day off with Kalinda out of his mind. This was work time, and he had his head in work mode. He was the last one in, he saw.
"Morning," he said to the group, all of whom were at their desks.
Greetings came his way before Atwater spoke. "There's a coffee on your desk, Sarge. And Deputy-Super Miller is waiting in your office."
Is she now, Hank thought as he headed straight there. It didn't take a master detective to deduce why his boss had shown up to see him. Something between a stern talking-to and the riot act was about to come his way over the unacceptable staff turnover rate. He had been expecting it. At least she had shown the courtesy to come to him rather than wasting his morning dragging him downtown for it. A lot of people in her position would not have done the same.
"Sam," he said in greeting when he walked into his office. He closed the door.
Miller was standing, showing the respect not to sit at his desk until he was in there with her. "Hank. How are you?"
"Doing just fine. Have a seat," Hank offered politely, wanting to repay the manners she had shown him. Miller took him up on it. "I have a feeling I know what this is about," he added as he sat down behind the desk.
"Let me say what I came here to say, Hank. As I personally have a lot of time and respect for you, trust me when I say I have no pleasure in telling you this. I'm being leaned on from above to replace you."
For a moment Hank wondered if he had heard wrong, although he knew he hadn't. It was a shock to say the least. "Excuse me?" was all he came up with for a response.
"It is thought by some that you've lost the control you once had over this unit. Case closures are down, complaints against your people are up, and your turnover of staff appears to be frankly out of control now that Detective Upton is also going."
Hank bristled. "I haven't lost control of a damn thing. My ability to run this unit hasn't changed, it's policing that has changed. We're being prevented from using proven, effective methods, that's why case closures are down. I'll admit the turnover of staff has been a problem. I've had people leave for various personal reasons, none of which have a bearing on me or anyone else at Chicago PD. Jay Halstead has already been replaced with an experienced detective in Kalinda Rai, and I'll move quickly to replace Upton with another experienced detective. The staffing problem is a temporary one."
Miller didn't look particularly impressed. "I can buy you some time, maybe three months. Hopefully your unit will perform well and you'll change some minds higher up the ladder. Between you and me? You're at an age where you can take advantage of the scheme the new mayor brought in to 'help' with cutting police numbers. You could retire with a full pension, Hank, no questions asked. That might be something to look at."
"I'll tell you what I've got to look at – the case we're working on right now," Hank snapped.
"Don't take my head off, Hank. I came here out of respect to politely let you know what the situation is, and to present you with an option that might be good for you. All I'm saying is think about it. If you do decide to stay on, I'll back you as much as I can. But be aware, that might not achieve much."
Hank nodded. It was as close to appreciation as she was going to get right now. As he watched Miller get up and leave, it began to dawn on him that he did owe her some gratitude. She could have opted to go along with whoever it was above her who wanted him gone, and he could have been out on his ass with little to no notice.
While he was angered by the prospect of being kicked out of his own unit, he wasn't exactly surprised. His style had always rubbed people the wrong way. Mainly people who knew how to shuffle paperwork and had no clue what real policing was about. Those people were becoming increasingly common in CPD. Now it seemed they were moving in for the kill, clearing out the old guard, probably intending to put some younger man or woman in his place who wouldn't be half as good as him at the job, but would 'cause less problems'.
So, what to do about it? Hank spent the morning thinking about that while doing his work. It was his nature to fight anyone who came at him. In this case that would mean trying to prove his doubters wrong and to make them kiss his ass to get him to stay. But what if he didn't do that? What if he went with Miller's idea of retiring with his full police pension? That, added to the money he had squirrelled away for himself over the years, would be more than enough to see him financially stable for the rest of his days. It wasn't only about money though. What would he do with his time? He wasn't exactly the sit at home in front of the TV with a crossword book all day kind of person. Without a job, he would go crazy.
Then it came to him. It was fresh in his mind because he had mentioned it to Kalinda only the previous day. The idea of starting a private detective service was one he had toyed with for years. Maybe now was the time to seriously pursue the idea? At the very least, it was worthy of further consideration.
A/N: What do you think Hank should do? Stay with Intelligence and try to prove himself, or walk away and start a private detective service?