Chapter 12 :
In the dark corner at the back of the Kitchens a female elf was snoring, entangled in dozens of empty bottles of Butterbeer. Just beside her another elf, looking like a bundle of wrinkles and wool, was manically organizing something in a big patched up trunk, laughing gleefully. Dishwasher had asked him to find new masters for them, the only two Free Elves of Great Britain, and Theodore was honestly disappointed by the lack of challenge of the request.
House Elves were fundamentally geared toward servitude. External magic was necessary to the working of their body but they were unable to gather it themselves. It was why they could not survive long without a bond to another magical being. As it was, these two Free Elves were bound to Hogwart itself so they could live a few years more, but it wasn't enough. The magic of living beings had a peculiar taste to it, it worked better for them. Without it they would die.
So yes, as far as Theodore was concerned, he was completely sure of his victory. He was even already thinking about how he would dispatch his new spy network as he walked toward them. Gentlemanly, he decided to start with the female one. Dropping to her level, he gently shook the elf to awaken her.
Patting her belly in a yawn, the elf slowly opened her eyelids. Blinking her sleep away, the first thing she saw was Nott's face peering at her. She squeaked loudly, getting up in a flurry of clumsy movements. Not really thinking straight she quickly washed her face with a rest of Butterbeer, yowling in distress when the drink prickled her eyes. Finally, eyes stinging red and crying but clean -if a little buttery- she shyly turned toward him.
"Hullo, Sir." She said. "What can Winky do's for you ?"
Not seeing the point of beating around the bush, Theodore directly asked :
"Do you want to be my elf ?"
The joyful cry that followed was certainly heard throughout all the castle :
"You be's wanting Winky as your elf ?! Truly !? Truly, truly, truly ?!"
"Yes... ?"
Before the brunet could even comprehend what was happening, Winky's magic latched onto his own and she fainted from an overload of happiness. Theodore blinked in wonder but shrugged : elves were weird like that. Since she was now part of his family, he put her body in a more comfortable position and then turned toward the other Free Elf.
One down, one to go.
Since it worked so well the first time, the young Nott bent down to the other elf's level and simply repeated :
"Do you want to be my elf ?"
Never stopping his hands from putting away what appeared to be... socks... ? The elf snorted in ridicule, barely glancing at him.
"No." He answered, stucking up his nose. "The only one Dobby be's accepting as a Master is The Great Harry Potter. No one else !"
Not to be deterred, Theodore immediately changed his approach :
"I can ask Harry to make you his elf... ?"
At that, Dobby sent him a murderous glare.
"NEVER !" He shouted, incensed. "NEVER will Dobby ever be's The Great Harry Potter's elf !"
The elf snarling at him, the poleaxed slytherin's countenance faltered for a second. It was one of his principles to be nice with elves. They were useful and, though they hid it, powerful allies. His grandfather always said : « You never know when they will suddenly decide to betray you, choosing to die rather than serve you. », but the young man never thought the day would come that would literallyillustrate thisstatement. Frustrated, he could only growl in askance :
"Why ?"
"You be's a fool !" Rebuked Dobby, hammering down his finger with his words. "If Dobby be's The Great Harry Potter's elf, Dobby not be receiving any socks from The Great Harry Potter anymore ! And The Great Harry Potter has the most exquisite taste in socks ! He be's offering Dobbys socks of excellent quality and wonderful craftsmanship ! And more ! The Great Harry Potter not be's stopping at that ! He sometimes even offer homemade socks ! Socks made by The Great Harry Potter himself ! Does you not be's understanding how much of a great value that be !?"
For all that he was courteous and cunning, preferring to act from the shadows rather than in the light, Theodore felt like punching something. It was gryffindorish, very unlike and beneath him, but he really, really wanted to. Gritting his teeth he offered, purely out of spite :
"What if I played the messenger ? I could give you socks from Harry."
Dobby's eyes widened, bedazzled. He could not believe his ears.
"You be's giving Dobbys socks from The Great Harry Potter ?!" He asked with hope. "Dogfathersly ? You not be's cheating Dobbys off his socks ? You not be's cheating Dobbys off his The Great Harry Potter ? Dogfathersly dogfathers ?!"
"I do not understand this « dogfathers » thing you speak of, but I'm going to assume you are asking about my seriousness. In which case : yes, I am serious."
The eccentric elf squealed in euphoria and Theodore couldn't help but sigh in exhaustion.
AN : Couldn't wait to publish this chapter ! Dobby is so much fun !
Plew