All of the gems had taken Rose's announcement hard. Garnet's hands had been shaking as she walked into the basement, the fact she didn't go into her own room saying just how delicate her state was.

Amethyst had clung to Rose's skirts and cried and Rose had scooped her into her arms and kissed her forehead "Oh, you don't need me little one, you never did. You're amazing, all on your own."

"Can I talk to you, Rose?" Pearl asked.

"Of course Pearl, what is it?"

Pearl thought she had taken the announcement rather well, all things considered. She had wrung her hands and yelled at Rose that she was insane and had started to walk away to kill Greg until Garnet had grabbed her, but you could hardly blame her for any of that.

She had calmed down now. "Alone?" She asked Rose. And Rose sighed. Sharing a look with Amethyst that Pearl knew well. Isn't she so needy, they were saying, isn't it pathetic the way she clings to you.

But Rose smiled at her, and she forgot what she had been thinking at all.

"Of course, Pearl." She said, putting Amethyst down on the ground. She opened the door to her room and Pearl followed her in, the only one of the Crystal Gems ever allowed to share this honor with her.

The room made a clearing, forest and rivers and a large rock for them to sit on. Always earth. Pearl thought Rose had truly never missed home. For she never recreated it here.

Rose took her hand. "I know you will miss me. But change is good, everything should change" She said, guiding her over to the rock and sitting, pulling Pearl onto her lap.

Pearl felt so safe here, surrounded by Rose, her hair, her skin, her gem pressing into her back. She could stay here forever, but only if she could convince Rose. "I won't, I mean- I don't have to. Rose. You don't have to do this."

"But I want a child." Rose said it so simply.

"So make one!" Pearl had no interest in a human child, but she would never show Rose that. If this is what Rose wanted she would support it, she would love it, like she had loved Amethyst. Maybe Rose would be right and it would be a good change, like Amethyst had been. But not how she meant it.

"The baby will need a gem, Pearl." Rose said simply.

"Yes. I know. But I was thinking. You know how I do that."

Rose laughed. Was it a good laugh? Was she glad she was thinking or amused she felt the need to announce it? To admit that it didn't come naturally to a Pearl. Pearl couldn't tell.

"Yes, I was thinking, and Rose, you don't have to use your own gemstone."

Rose didn't say anything.

"You can make one Rose! Like your pebbles, like your moss, you can make a gemstone, and then you can give that to your baby. And then we can have a baby Rose! A human gem baby like you want! And you can be okay! And here! And love it with us! Don't you want to see your baby, Rose!" Pearl knew she sounded desperate, but Rose could be so hard to talk out of anything.

"Pearl…" and just like that Pearl knew Rose hadn't listened. "I want to do this."

How many times had Pearl heard those words, how many times had she made sure Rose got whatever she wanted. But she couldn't this time. Rose was asking too much.

"The others won't question it! Garnet doesn't question anything! And Amethyst doesn't know anything! We can tell them whatever you want! Or…we can tell them it was a corrupted gem, if you don't want to say you made it! Or…a gem that didn't finish forming from the beta. There were so many failures there, they won't wonder about another one! And it doesn't have to be a pebble, I mean, you made those by accident, just think what you could make if you tried Rose, you might even make a quartz, isn't that what you want? A quartz baby? And I still remember the plans for the rose quartzes I'm sure I could - We could -"

"Pearl." Rose cut her off wrapping a large hand around her, trying to calm her, she turned her towards her, and Pearl drew her legs to her chest so she could fit on her lap like she had done a million times before. Pearl could see the concern in Rose's eyes. "Stop." Rose said, and Pearl shut her mouth. Rose was squeezing her gently, it felt like a crushing weight around her. She hoped against hope Rose would listen. But Rose looked concerned, not altered from her path. Her mind was made up, and tears ran down Pearl's cheeks.

Rose sighed, "Humans change so easily, they grow, they learn who they want to be by how they live. My child will be like that, a human being, incredible and changing and perfect."

"They can be all of that, just with a different gem, rose, please." Pearl said weakly. Knowing the battle was lost.

"This is what I want, Pearl."

"I know" Pearl did know. It was always what Rose wanted. Garnet, Amethyst and her…they didn't want this, but that never mattered. Greg- greg! "But what about Greg? Shouldn't you wait longer?" She asked. "You've only been with him four years…I'm sure he could be interesting for much longer, Rose..he might write more music, you wouldn't want to miss that!"

Rose laughed again, louder and fuller this time. " Pearl…I didn't know you liked Greg so much." Pearl could have sworn there was a note of teasing in her voice if she didn't know better.

"I've…come around to him." She lied " You like him..and I would hate for you to miss out on any part of that. He's…got so much life left" Humans lived such short lives, it was the only thing that made them tolerable.

"I want him to have that life with our child." Rose said simply. "I want him to spend a lifetime with our child."

Pearl didn't know what to say, she had nothing to say, Rose had thought it out. And had dismissed every option. There was no plan or action Pearl could do that would save Rose this time, not from herself.

Rose brushed away her tears with the hand that wasn't wrapped around her. "Don't cry Pearl." She said, and she kissed her.

And oh, how Pearl had missed her these past years, every second of Rose's life full of Greg, Greg and more Greg. She kissed her back, eagerly, desperately. But it still felt wrong. How could it feel right knowing it could be their last kiss? Not because Pearl would be shattered in some heroic battle, but because Rose was trading herself out for another life. When Rose pulled away from the kiss, Pearl didn't try to kiss her again.

In the weeks that followed Pearl found herself more and more often trapped in her own mind. There was nothing she could say to the others, Garnet and Amethyst begged Rose to change her mind, and Amethyst offered to steal her a child. Garnet asked who would lead in her absence. She did not look comforted when Rose said she could do it. Pearl sat with her back to the wall, hands pressed over her mouth holding in her screams. Garnet gestured a hand at her. "Pearl is so upset she can't speak. We can't handle you leaving."

Pearl was irrationally angry at Garnet for a second. I can speak just fine, you just can't hear, she thought. The gag order haunted her in a way it never had before. She wondered if she could tell the other two that Rose could create gems that they would talk Rose out of this terrible plan.

But it didn't matter. Pearl couldn't even take her hands off her mouth.