Dear readers, very often I write the preface before writing chapter, when I read your comments and messages.

Firstly, thank you so much for your feedback, it's very much appreciated!

Secondly, thank you for being tolerant to "killing off" such a good character. It wasn't easy and I thought there would be a lot of angry feedback. It might just be that the part of the audience that was on Roy's team will just stop reading the story, but that's okay.

I really liked Roy, but I knew he wasn't the main character here. The scenes with him are romantic and sweet but, we hardly hear his thoughts except for a couple of moments.

He was in this story for a reason. He showed Scarlett her worth, that it was possible to be who she was and have someone around who would appreciate it. He showed Rhett how to treat the woman he loved. Rhett will have to learn.

I will just say that Roy would have clearly won at this point, Rhett made such a mess of their relationship (well ok, they both did their best) that it's not easy to fix it all now.

I can assure you, Scarlett will not jump into Rhett's arms, I mean in love sense, if only because she is grieving right now. Somehow she had romantic feelings for Roy. She felt loved around him, he treated her well, he saw her as more than just a "pretty face".

And, she believes that Rhett has no feelings for her, unless she worries that he might treat her like one of the girls from the Watling's Saloon.

She doesn't need "love" right now, she needs support, strength, a friend in the end. Anyway, Rhett will have something to do. But the war doesn't stop, we all know it's going to get rough.

Enjoy reading:)

P.S. Everyone lives through grief in their own way. It seemed to me that Scarlett could live it that way...

I own nothing in regard to GWTW.

Chapter 10.

Melanie walked quietly into Scarlett's bedroom and closed the door behind her. She had checked on her nephew a moment before, and she and Prissy had decided to take full care of him tonight.

Scarlett didn't seem to have changed her posture, she was also lying on her side, turned towards the window, her skirts were a bit of a mess, wrinkled. Melanie was glad she had time to loosen Scarlett's corset. And she was also glad Aunt Pitty wasn't home, she had gone to Mrs Meade's and, Melanie sighed sorrowfully, she would going to be there for a while. The doctor's eldest son was also on the list of the dead, which Melanie quickly looked over as they were travelling back in the carriage.

Sighing softly, Melanie walked determinedly over to Scarlett, sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked her shoulder affectionately.

"Sweetheart, how are you?" she asked, but Scarlett didn't want to speak, only staring silently out the window, which overlooked the grey-blue July sky. Not a cloud, just that haunting grey-blue colour.

Melanie decided to start some sort of conversation, "Darling, Mary will bring you and me some tea now." Silence.

"Let's drink it together, it'll help calm you down." Silence.

Melanie decided to continue cautiously, "I've seen Captain Butler off, Honey, he was very worried about you." Silence.

Melanie decided to joke softly, "You had the 'dashing blockade runner' worried, Scarlett." A barely perceptible sigh and silence again.

Melanie sat closer and began stroking Scarlett's hair, which was also slightly mussed. She began to speak softly, "Sweetheart, please let me stay close to you. I know, Scarlett, I know that you've suffered a terrible loss today. That these are your childhood friends, that these are your acquaintances, that this is your loved one..."

Scarlett twitched her shoulder slightly and looked at Melanie with a sad look.

"I know, Honey I know that Mr Thompson and you cared for each other very much. I'm very bitter for you, Scarlett. Let me be there for you."

Scarlett looked into her sister-in-law's kind brown eyes and turned away to the window again.

There was a quiet knock and Mary entered the room with a tray in her hands, on which stood a white teapot and two cups.

Melanie stood up, took the tray from the maid and said, "Thank you, I'll take it from here."

Mary walked out quietly and Melanie placed the tray on the bedside table.

Scarlett wasn't watching Melanie, but then apparently some thought began to bother her, she lifted up and asked quietly, "Melly, Wade? How's Wade? He needed to be fed and..."

Melanie quietly thanked the heavens that Scarlett had started talking and sitting down beside her again, she said, "Don't worry, Honey, I've been checking on him. Prissy and I have arranged everything, he's fine. Please, let's take care of you today..."

Scarlett wanted to lie down again, but Melanie stopped her.

"Wait, Darling, we must have tea," Melanie said affectionately but insistently, and Scarlett didn't have the energy to argue with her.

She took a cup of the warm drink and began to drink it slowly, looking in front of her.

"Don't you want to eat, Honey? I noticed you hardly had any breakfast today..."

Scarlett shook her head negatively.

Melanie continued quietly, "That heat made you pass out today. It's a good thing Captain Butler was there to help us, Honey. You know, I've never seen him so excited," Melanie continued, but Scarlett suddenly interrupted her.

"It wasn't the heat, Melly..." and she sighed heavily, then whispered, "The Tarleton boys, the twins were my best friends. I can't imagine how Mrs Tarleton will bear it...I must write to her, to express my condolences, Melly. Yes?" finished Scarlett questioningly and Melanie nodded, thinking she should write to India as well.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, Scarlett finished her tea and was about to go back to bed to sleep for a while, but as she ran her hand through her hair she realized it was a mess.

She reached for a comb, but Melanie, putting the cup on the tray, beat her to it.

Taking the comb, she said affectionately, "Let me help you, Darling. When I was very little, when my mother was still alive, she used to brush my hair if I was sad..."

Scarlett looked intently into Mellie's kind brown eyes and, with a nod, turned back to her.

Melanie began to quietly untangle her black hair, removing the pins.

She brushed her hair gently, strand by strand, taking her time and Scarlett thought, for a moment, that it was Ellen, her mother, beside her. That she was not miles away, in Tara, but here in the same room with them.

Melanie dared to ask another question that troubled her.

Running a brush through her hair, she said, "Honey, maybe you should offer condolences to Mr Thompson's family? His mother?"

"In what capacity could I write to her, Melly? asked Scarlett in a quiet voice.

Melanie didn't have anything to say, just kept brushing her almost-sister's hair gently.

"Melly," Scarlett said quietly, "I didn't tell you because..." here her voice trembled, but she took a deep breath and continued, "Roy... He... He proposed to me the last time we met. He asked me to marry him and I said 'yes'. He asked me to keep it a secret as he wanted to talk to my parents first. He also wanted to hint to his mother that he was getting married soon. But, he hasn't told her about me, she doesn't know who I am..." she finished bitterly.

Melanie put away the hairbrush, quickly sat down in front of Scarlett and hugged her tightly.

Scarlett wanted to cry, to cry non-stop about everything. All the losses. All the disappointments. But, with an effort of will, she stopped herself and, pulling away, smiled weakly at Melanie.

"Melly, thank you."

Melanie smiled back at her, but looked with bitterness and pain.

Then Scarlett lay down and soon fell into a restless sleep.

As the day went on, day turned to night, night to day, Scarlett and Melanie were at the hospital almost every day. Next to Dr. Meade, who had aged ten years since the loss of his eldest son, Scarlett felt confident. They hardly spoke, but she was the one the old doctor often chose to be his assistant.

They didn't look at each other with sorrowful glances or express constant condolences. They just did their jobs. Silently. Dr.Meadе didn't talk about 'near victory' anymore, he didn't talk much at all these days. Neither did Scarlett.

Scarlett was living these days like a blur. She simply ordered herself not to think about those she'd lost. At the slightest memory, she either went straight to whatever she was doing, whether it was the hospital or taking care of her son, or started counting in her mind so she wouldn't think.

"I won't think about it now. No, not now." She repeated those words to herself each time and the memories receded.

Melanie watched Scarlett very closely and grew sadder each day and a small wrinkle formed between her eyebrows.

Her sister- in-law didn't try to grieve, didn't live this pain, but shut herself off from it, ran from it. Melanie realized that all her outward determination and confidence was just a house of cards that would crumble with a little pressure. Something had to be done.

Two weeks passed and Melanie decided to write a note to Captain Butler at the hotel.

Rhett sat in his room, it was already evening. These two weeks had passed in his thoughts and constant worry for Scarlett. He'd seen her outside the hospital, he'd secretly watched them from afar every day.

She didn't look like herself and it worried him. Too serious looking, too pale, too thin. But, he couldn't approach or come to them, they had a deal with Melanie that she would call him herself, so he was waiting.

Once Rhett went to Belle's saloon to apologize for his drunken behaviour, but their meeting ended in a quarrel. Belle was furious when she learnt that he was not going anywhere, but staying to "serve that little widow".

"She's not the only one who's lost loved ones, Rhett! All Georgia is grieving," she told him, and he replied, "She's not the only one, Belle, but she's the one my heart aches for."

She shouted at him that he would ruin his life by her side, and then asked him wryly if Rhett was "afraid of competing with a ghost all his life?"

"Darling, you can't beat him..." she laughed, and Rhett, looking at her in disgust, only asked, "What's the matter with you, Belle?" and walked out of the bar without looking back.

He was distracted from his thoughts by a knock on the door, and he walked quickly over, adjusting the sleeves of his white shirt as he went, and opened it. The porter greeted him politely and handed him a note.

"Thank you," Rhett replied quickly, and closing the door, impatiently unfolded it.

In the note Melanie invited him to keep them company tomorrow and drive out of town, at ten o'clock in the morning.

Rhett smiled happily and was now counting the hours until the new day.

Scarlett sat in her bedroom and looked out the window. A new day was beginning, the streets were still sleepy, the first rays of sunlight were just making their way into her bedroom.

She couldn't sleep. She hadn't slept well for the last two weeks since the terrible news, falling asleep long, sleeping restlessly and waking early. Already dressed in a black dress, she reflected that she could allow herself to continue wearing mourning without arousing suspicion.

She grinned bitterly, thinking that she was already a widow. Rhett's bitter words came out of nowhere,"By the way, aren't you afraid of being widowed again, dear?"

Yes, she had been a widow for two years, but only now her soul was acquainted with grief.

With Charles, it was indifference and relief that she would no longer have to share his bed and life. She wasn't glad to think of it, but there it was.

But with Roy. It felt kind of pointless. It was like how not so long ago he was sitting next to her, holding her hand, kissing her tenderly, and now he was gone. He's just gone. It doesn't make any sense.

And her friends, the Tarleton twins! She could not imagine that they would no longer come to her on their horses, racing. That no more would they take her under their arms on both sides and tell her all the latest gossip. That they would no longer make jokes about Suellen and their sisters, as they had done since they were children...

Scarlett pressed her hands to her temples and rubbed them. Her head hurt.

She suddenly realized that even if the war ended now, this very minute, their life, their world, would not be the same! Everything was crumbling before her eyes, and she didn't know where something solid and strong was. Something to help her survive the loss, something to give her strength.

She, out of habit, tried to distract herself with her thoughts. Melanie had decided of going out of town today, on their only day off from the hospital. And not just for fun, but in the company of Rhett Butler!

Scarlett had not forgotten their fight and his behaviour, and some phrases sometimes crept through the veil in her mind.

But... She sighed heavily... It all made no sense to her now. She didn't have the energy right now to argue with him or try to convince Melanie to cancel this meeting. After all, she could limit herself to a polite greeting and a couple of phrases, as was the norm of behaviour. That would be enough for them.

With firm resolve, she got up and went to Wade's room to take care of him before breakfast.

At breakfast, for the first time in weeks, Melanie tried to look enthusiastic, while Scarlett was quietly picking at her plate.

At precisely ten o'clock they heard the sound of a carriage pulling up and Melanie, went out first to "say hello to Captain Butler."

Scarlett merely shrugged her shoulders and finished packing Wade, and then, handing him to Prissy, sent them outside, while she herself lingered in front of the hall mirror. She took a long look at herself as if she were a stranger, and then, carefully smoothing her hair, which she had gathered into a knot at the back of her head, she left the house.

Despite her determination, her heart beat faster at the sight of Rhett in his white linen costume, and her hands trembled. But pushing memories away, she headed resolutely toward the carriage.

Rhett was sitting in the carriage, talking quietly with Melanie, and Scarlett noted that they both looked serious. She once again mentally talked herself, that she had to be patient until lunch, just a couple of hours.

When he spotted her from afar, Rhett got out of the carriage at once. His heart pounded frantically as she walked in his direction.

He looked at her carefully, so pale, but with her bright green eyes. He thanked the heavens that their sparkle had not disappeared.

"Scarlett," he addressed her softly, and held out his hand to greet her.

She gave him her hand in silence, he kissed it, then stood up straight, looked into her eyes and asked, "How are you, Dear?"

Her eyes avoided his gaze and she simply replied, "I'm fine, Rhett, let's go before it gets too hot..."

He helped her into the carriage with Melly and Wade, took the reins himself and they drove quietly to the field where they had once sat, with the flowers.

Seated under a spreading tree, they talked, played with Wade,quietly discussing city events, but mostly Melanie and Rhett. Scarlett was silent and pensive.

It broke Rhett's heart to see her trying to be strong without being so.

Eventually, Wade fell asleep while Scarlett quietly stroked his back and the baby's head was on his aunt's lap.

"I think I'm a prisoner," Melanie joked quietly and looked at Rhett seriously and expressively.

"Looks like it," he replied with a smile, and Scarlett grinned.

"Scarlett, let's take a little walk around the field," Rhett suggested and Melanie smiled slightly and nodded.

Scarlett looked at Melanie, at Rhett, then at her sleeping son and only shrugged.

Rhett helped her up and they walked across the field. The grass had already become yellowish-brown, scorched, not the bright green as it was in April.

They walked in silence, taking their time, the sun now and then hiding behind the clouds. They had travelled far enough, stopping on a rise, Scarlett looking ahead, and Rhett stopping behind her. Close up, he could see her shoulders heaving from her rapid breathing ("that damn corset," he thought), the few small strands of her hair that were mussed in the wind. He wanted so badly to touch her, to hold her, but he couldn't.

He asked her quietly, "How are you, Scarlett?"

"I'm okay" came the idle reply.

He clenched his hands into fists. Damn it, she wasn't okay!

"Maybe we can talk to you for a while," he tried again. She just shook her head in response, not even turning around. He couldn't take it anymore, so he walked around and stood in front of her, looking her seriously in the eye.

"Stop it, Scarlett! Do you hear me!" he exclaimed.

She looked at him surprised, but an angry light lit up in her eyes and he realized he was on the right track.

"I said stop it! Stop making yourself look strong when you're not now!"

"Leave me alone, Rhett Butler," she hissed back.

"No!"

She glared angrily at him and was about to walk away, but he grabbed her elbow and whispered to her roughly and desperately, "Stop it, Scarlett, please! You're breaking my heart with your behaviour!"

"What do you care about me, Rhett Butler?"

"I'm your friend! I want to be there for you!"

"You and I have different ideas about friendship!"

"Of course I'm not the kind of 'gentleman' who's always around you! I'm not like HIM, damn it!" exclaimed he angrily.

"How dare you?!" Don't you dare talk about him!" she shouted in reply.

"I'll talk as much as I like, Mrs Hamilton!"

For a second she thought she couldn't breathe. It felt like she'd been punched hard in the stomach. His words reopened that fresh wound in her soul that she had pushed to the corner of her mind. It hurt, really hurt, and she wanted to hurt him!

With anger she pounded her fist on his chest, then again and again, she no longer noticed the tears running down her cheeks, the sobs shaking her shoulders. He stood so strong and tall and held her tightly by the shoulders as she sobbed. He stroked her back softly, her hair, and all she did was sob. The shirt on his chest was soaking wet, but he didn't care. He wanted her to cry out the pain of her loss, to feel a little better. He was with her.

Gradually her sobs became less and less frequent, but he was in no hurry to let her go.

"I'm sorry, Scarlett," he said quietly, "I made you angry on purpose, because you're hurting, but you can't keep that pain to yourself. I'm bitter for you, Darling."

She stood pressed against him and did not know what to answer. She was in pain, but it became easier in his arms. It was as if he shared a part of her grief.

He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and gently wiped her wet cheeks. She only looked at him with her green eyes glistening with tears.

Then, looking seriously at her, Rhett said most importantly, "I'm sorry about that conversation we had, I would never wish for you to lose a loved one, even in joke. I said too much that time, out of resentment, anger, I didn't think of a single word. I'm sorry, Scarlett," he said with despair.

She looked at him and nodded, smiling weakly. He was apologizing to her so seriously for the first time.She believed him.

"Thank you, Rhett," she said softly, "for apologizing. And for now... I feel a little better, I even want to eat for the first time in days," she added with a faint smile and he smiled affectionately at her.

"Come on Scarlett, let's go back to Miss Melly and Wade."

She nodded to him and they walked side by side through that parched grass.

They walked in silence, but there was none of the awkwardness and coldness between them that had been there at the beginning of their meeting.

He shared her grief with her, and they grew a little closer.

Rhett walked beside Scarlett, not daring to take her hand, but looking at her quietly. At her pale face, at the small shadows under her eyes that spoke of a bad dream, at her lean figure. Melanie had told him at the beginning that, "Scarlett eats little, very little."

He looked at her and his heart sank with the care and love he would give her when she was ready. He wasn't intimidated by Belle's harsh words about 'competing with a ghost', he wasn't going to take HIS place in her heart. He wanted to find his OWN place in her soul and he knew he could occupy it.