The first thing Hanabi noticed as her eyes opened was that the room was pitch black.
Which meant it was likely the middle of the night. Or that they had activated the blackout seals.
The second thing she noticed was that strong hands had moved to grab her hips. Naruto's warm body pressed against her back.
And he was definitely awake. His hands were much too precise for anything else.
'Again… really?' She thought, amused. 'The others weren't enough...? What's wrong with you?'
'There must be something in the air.' Naruto sent back.
'I'm sure.' She rolled her eyes. Still, she pushed her ass against him. 'And of course, you had to wake me up.'
'Well… Ino would try to bite me if I woke her up.' Naruto sent her.
'What am I, second choice?' Hanabi laughed, meaning nothing by it.
'Of course not.' He chuckled. 'Karin wants to make sure Yugito has someone with her at all times so she's sleeping close to her… You're third choice, I'd say.' He deadpanned.
She laughed and then tried to smother it when she felt Ino stir.
'I understand your dilemma quite well.' Hanabi chuckled. 'I was trying to wake Sakura myself… but I guess you'll do, then.'
'Thank you, mistress.'
'You may kiss my neck then, peasant.'
He began doing so. 'Only your neck…?'
'They're sleeping, aren't they…?' She held back a moan.
'How kind of you. You truly are the strongest, most compassionate woman in the world, Queen Hanabi.'
'Empress, actually. I married up.'
He stifled his laughter.
'Well… Why don't you come in, then?'
She was pretty turned on already — his fault, really, she had been sleeping —, and took him in, as she had countless times already. Hanabi moved to provide him easier access.
His hand moved to cup her breasts, and she turned around just enough to kiss him.
They worked themselves up into a slow, sleepy, steady rhythm. A single seal he applied to the bed kept the volume of the wet noises down. The bed was still moving.
She moaned, not so softly. Her legs were trembling, her toes were curling—
Something hit Hanabi in the face.
"Ugh." Ino grumbled. "Lemmesleep."
She fell asleep again.
Naruto stifled a chuckle and Hanabi glared at him. She tried to close her eyes and go back to sleep to spite him.
She still felt him throb inside her, and she clenched around him in answer, thighs quivering.
Hanabi moved back, hips rocking to meet him. Naruto chuckled again and stopped moving entirely. She continued pushing back, impaling herself on his length, her frustration rising.
Hanabi glared at him again.
'What? That's not on me.' He laughed.
'It is on you.' Hanabi growled. 'Now finish the job.'
'I'm afraid I can't.' He laughed. 'She will feel it.'
She glared at him — not that he could see it, but he knew her — and both of them disappeared in a flash of white.
They reappeared on the bathroom floor in a tangle of limbs.
Yugito, who apparently couldn't sleep tonight either, let out a long-suffering sigh from the bath.
"Why did I even agree to come…?"
The two paused. Hanabi scoffed. "You're not any better yourself."
Naruto was about to say something too, but they disappeared again.
"…Whatever." Yugito rolled her eyes.
Outside of Konoha.
"You woke me up for this…?" Hanabi glared at him. "To provoke me?"
Naruto laughed. "Of course not. But the first round's called foreplay."
Hanabi wasn't exactly the patient type. Her flushed cunt was gaping, his cum and her arousal leaking, running down to her asshole; staining the bedsheets he had created — they were in the middle of nowhere, really.
"Beautiful." He grinned.
"Whatever." She smiled despite herself. "I hope you're not done yet, you... smooth-talker."
He slid into her again.
"That's better, now why don't you — Ah. Just like that!"
Strongest woman in the world, she said. Most impatient, rather.
…Well, now that he thought about, maybe she really was.
The strongest, he meant. Here, at least.
Later that night. Konoha.
Naruto joined Hanabi on the roof.
He brought her a warm infusion — the least he could do, after… waking her up, really. Konoha could get pretty cold during the nights, and they both knew it. Not that the cold ever reached them, now. Not anymore.
Hanabi was standing close to the edge of the roof, leaning over the safety barrier. "Konoha looks pretty small from up here, huh?" She asked.
Above them, the night sky stretched. Gray tones, black, blue too.
Naruto smiled. "I guess it always was." He drew closer, handing her a cup. "We were just too young, too small ourselves to see it, then."
There was more light pollution in Konoha than in Umi, and few stars were visible.
"Are you giving me this to ask for my forgiveness…?" She asked, staring at him.
"I've got nothing to be forgiven for." He laughed.
"Waking me up…?"
He pointed at the sky.
"There's nothing more romantic than the full moon." Naruto said wisely.
She pointed at the moon. "…It's not even half full."
"You have to earn these things, dear. You thought marriage was enough…?" Naruto shook his head. "Think again."
Hanabi laughed.
"Give me my tea, then, jerk." She took the steaming cup.
He smiled and pressed a kiss into her hair. She gave him the sweetest look. A big smile that reached her eyes; one that felt as though it was for him only.
Hanabi was softer than he ever thought she could be, back when he first met her. But then again, there were layers upon layers of walls, then. Not so much now.
They settled into easy conversation.
Dawn threatened to break the blue of the sky by the time they got back to the house.
The next morning.
Naruto was in the kitchen, humming as he chopped the vegetables up.
He was wearing his 'Kiss the cook' apron; a gift from Karin.
There was a pleasant smell in the air. One of Naruto's ever-present clones was playing the koto softly.
He was cooking for the six of them — and Toru, when he was around, which was pretty often. Sakura was as terrible of a cook as ever, and Karin wasn't all that great either — she tended to get distracted too much. Yugito was great at it, but he wasn't feeling nearly dickish enough to ask her to do so right now.
Sakura scooted closer, wrapping her arm around his waist. She pressed her face against his shoulder blades. He grinned.
"Up already?"
"Of course." She smiled. "You know what we missed?"
He raised an eyebrow.
"Do tell, dear."
"Miyata Tsukiko." She simply said.
"…The romance novelist..?" Naruto chuckled. "What about her?"
"I'm telling you." She grinned. "She didn't write the same books at all in here."
"Oh, no?"
"Nope." Sakura shook her head. "It's a whole new world out there—"
"Of cheesy romances…?"
"Ah, don't be like that." She laughed. "I know you read them too."
"I read everything I find." Naruto shrugged.
"Well, then you have some more to read." She laughed. "There's like ten more of them. Hit the bookshops with me today."
Sakura grinned, and Naruto couldn't help but grin too.
"Sure. As long as it's not as bad as The Knife and the Rose." He chuckled.
"It wasn't that bad if you just ignored the… weaker parts…" Sakura rolled her eyes. "Ah, if you tell Ino that I'm still reading Miyata's books, I'm going to deny everything."
"As usual, then."
"Of course." Sakura nodded.
"Your secret is safe with me."
"I know, husband."
Yugito came down the stairs first. She gave Naruto a disgruntled look.
Naruto grinned back in answer. "Morning."
"…Morning." She grumbled back. Karin passed her and squeezed her ass. Yugito yelped.
"Morning." Karin called brightly. "This looks great. The food, I mean."
"Yes." Naruto nodded. "I poisoned your food, Karin, but I can't… for the life of me, remember which plate that was. I guess Yugito will have to try it first so that the married people may live."
"I guess that's the only way." Karin laughed.
Yugito rolled her eyes again, but there was a smile pulling on her lips.
There was a whistling sound and a knock at their door.
Toru invited himself in. He was wearing his "I Went To Hell And All I Got Was This T-Shirt." A favorite of his, really… in spite of the fact he remembered nothing at all from his trip. His sleeves were rolled back, because he privately enjoyed showing a bit of shoulder. And speaking of shirts…
"Put a shirt on, meathead." Toru greeted him. He continued, in the same breath. "Hey girls."
"Morning to you too, Toru-sama." Naruto greeted back.
"Ah man…" Toru grinned, as he did every time he was addressed with the honorific.
Karin bowed in deference and his grin grew larger. "Lord Sage of Six Paths the Second." She greeted.
"It is I, yes. You may rise, young one." Toru nodded sagely.
He sat.
"Okay. What the hell was that with Kakashi?" Toru asked, on him like a hawk.
"Ah, already?" Naruto grumbled. "You've been here for an entire minute. Good job on spilling the beans yesterday night, by the way."
"He just knows me well." Toru muttered. "I was his favorite, I'm sure."
"Not the same guy." Karin laughed.
"Whatever." Toru grumbled. "You dragged him away!" He pointed at Naruto.
"Gai dragged him away." Naruto corrected.
"Gai was in a wheelchair yesterday afternoon."
"I guess he felt like walking again." Naruto chuckled.
"Fuck you, man." Toru frowned.
"We'll see Kakashi around, I'm sure. Plus it's not like this world is going to disappear or anything." Naruto waved off.
And through their Sasuke's presence in their home world, they would always have a way back to their own, as an extra contingency.
"…You gave a Rinnegan to the Hokage." Yugito muttered.
"He's a nice guy." Naruto nodded. "A bit like me, really."
She stared at him.
"…I think I like him better, really." Toru retorted. "He might not be… Uh…"
"Say it." Naruto grinned.
"…There are smarter people around, all right? He knows it and doesn't care, so what does it matter…?" Toru asked. "He's a great guy… and sure knows how to party."
"…Kurama threatened me once the Hokage got drunk enough." Naruto reminded him.
"I would do the same." Toru nodded.
"You're not a thousand year old chakra construct."
"Neither are you." He pointed out.
"Not yet… But give or take five hundred years…"
"Can you pass me the salt, Sakura…?" Yugito asked. "…Karin, are you playing footsies again…?"
"No." She said innocently. Yugito squinted. Lie.
"…Morning." Hanabi appeared, walking down the stairs gingerly.
"To think she used to be a morning person." Toru shook his head. He tried to pretend he didn't know why she was stepping down so carefully.
"Morning, one-eye." She glared at him.
"I've got two, now."
"Whatever." She mumbled, sitting next to Yugito.
"Where's Ino?" Karin asked.
"Snoring still. Are we waiting?"
"Yugito started already."
"I'm pregnant and starving." She retorted.
Toru nodded slowly. "Giving birth to an actual demon must take a lot of energy."
Yugito frowned.
"…Because they're going to be Naruto's child, not anything to do with the Beasts." Toru explained.
"Ah."
Naruto rolled his eyes. "They're not going to be a demon… a misanthrope at worst."
"Now why would that be, I wonder…?" Yugito asked him pointedly.
"Good teachers…?" Naruto shrugged.
Ino came down as well, looking mostly asleep still. She really wasn't much of a morning person either, these days.
Yanabe Books.
Hatake Kakashi was looking for something decent to read.
Ever since Jiraiya's passing… Nothing grabbed his attention the same way.
And that had been years and years ago.
Sure, sure there were plenty of new romances since then… there was smut… there was comedy.
But no author quite managed the exact same blend of filthiness, fluff, novel-like manner and subversive humor that Jiraiya simply seemed to burn into every page.
There had been no shortage of people who had tried, either.
The Tangle, by Hiraoka Haruka, had been… okay. Kakashi had just found himself… unbelievably underwhelmed. No stakes, no drama… just a cliche plot.
Gorgeous, by Ishikawa Chie, had been a bit better. More smutty than needed, really, but it was a bit lacking when it came to the whole… love, affection and respect for each other. Chemistry was great, sure… but there was something lacking here. He ended up reading it for the plot.
The Emperor's Lusty Court, by Sanda Chiyoko, had been a big disappointment. It had started so strongly, too… The sappy parts had him feeling a bit misty, sure, but it was a decent three out of five, at most. Decent smut, though.
Really… none of these three, which he had read over the last two weeks, satisfied the itch. They were nothing.
Nothing like Icha Icha Storm… Which painted the bonds between a man and a woman so stirringly.
Nothing like Icha Icha Heroes, and its genre-bending, subversive take on old tropes. Truly, Jiraiya had been a visionary.
Nothing like Icha Icha Paradise, even. And that one was a classic.
And…
Kakashi's sharp nose told him who was in the book shop before his almost as sharp ears confirmed it.
Their smells were different from the people he knew — especially this Naruto's. Hormones were a hell of a thing, whatever it was that this man had done to himself.
Considering he had seemingly fixed Gai in the blink of an eye — because really, who else could it have been…? —, something like it didn't sound like it was too far-fetched, far from it.
"I think she would like it." The woman, well… Sakura said firmly.
"Hanabi likes her… porn to be a bit more… kinky." Naruto said.
"…So that's not depraved enough…? The Daimyo I Tempted…?"
Kakashi froze. He had read that one.
"No."
"…Two More Whips?" Sakura asked dubiously.
"I think it's strictly guy on guy." Naruto mused. "Well, guys on guy. She would read it."
"…How do you know this?"
Kakashi knew it as well.
"I like reading." Naruto shrugged. "I don't have to have the same sexual preference as the protagonist. Or at least, it won't stop me if the book's good."
"…Was it?"
"I've read better." Naruto laughed.
"What about this one?" Sakura asked. "Let me read you the summary. Lord Kyūjitai Yasuo has spent his life trying to oppose a brutal, selfish tyrant, and keep the concubines under his care alive. Right now… he is on the verge of losing everything. The council wants to abolish the harems, there are no heirs to the throne, and the outsiders control the Land of Light. One wrong move will tip tensions into civil war—"
"I don't know if she'd like it." Naruto mused. "It kinda sounds… too close to home."
"Why… Which part?" Sakura chuckled. "The Harem lord… or the selfish tyrant…?"
"Yes, exactly." Naruto nodded. Sakura cackled.
Kakashi blinked. Now that he thought of it… He could smell him on her… her smell on him as well. And… others, too.
Kakashi felt a surge of vicarious pride. He wiped an imaginary tear away.
To think that the Naruto who hadn't studied under Jiraiya would be the one who ended up applying the man's teachings…
…Perhaps it was because of it.
Neither Minato-sensei nor Kushina would have been too happy about it, he was pretty sure of it. Well, they were in the Pure Lands with Obito and Rin, anyway.
"…And what about the Threeway Tie?" Sakura laughed. "MMF, though. Unless… Are you afraid that it's going to give her any weird ideas about you and Toru, perhaps…?"
Naruto chuckled. "Nah, far from it. She won't ever admit it, but he's her best friend — because who else would even put up with her shit, besides us…?"
"Hanabi's his best friend…?" Sakura tilted her head.
"That's not what I said. Toru is Hanabi's closest friend. I'm Toru's best friend." Naruto nodded sagely.
"…Oh?" She raised an eyebrow.
"Who else would be?"
"…Hanabi herself…?"
"Don't be ridiculous." Naruto snorted. "Toru loves me — in a very straight sort of way."
"…And I assume the same thing goes for you?"
"A best friend…? …I don't have any favorite, of course." Naruto said magnanimously.
"I'm sure." Sakura deadpanned. "Well, if you don't want to say anything about friendships… Ino's not here, you can finally admit that I'm your—"
"Trying to stir shit again… Sakura, really?" He shook his head. "Besides, Kakashi is listening in."
"Yeah, I noticed." She answered.
"Wasn't." Kakashi said.
He turned around a bookshelf and greeted them.
"Hello Sakura; my cute little murderer." He eye-smiled.
"Kakashi." She nodded.
"Kakashi." Naruto sighed. "I guess you're not going to let me get out of that one, then…?"
"Not for as long as I live — which depends on you, of course…"
Naruto pursed his lips.
"Thinking about it…" Sakura ignored him. "You do read porn in public, right?"
"…It's erotica." Kakashi contested.
"Can you give us a few recommendations…?"
Kakashi paused. Did they mean…?
None of his actual students had shown any affinity for the finer forms of literature.
This day… was getting stranger and stranger. He was already half-expecting Gai to come through the glass window, really.
"…Sure, what sort?"
Naruto and Sakura shared a look.
"Sweetness with smut… I guess." Naruto shrugged.
"Ah, sure, sure." Kakashi nodded. "Entranced by Kawamoto Emiko is pretty good… Shinobi: Masters & Bandits by Miura Kamiko is another good one — she writes very sweet BDSM where consent and safe words are strictly followed and emotional connection and trust's the main theme. The subs have agency of course - control over their lives and relationships. This isn't anything like Yasuda Yasuko's The Notion of You, where the H's are sort of deranged and there's a lot of CNC — too much for my tastes, at least. It's also not so traditional in the sense that—"
"So that's the sort of stuff you read in public…?" Naruto blinked.
"…Not always." Kakashi looked away.
"And here I thought Miyata Tsukiko was bad enough…" Sakura muttered.
"Oh…?" Kakashi blinked. "You're a fan?"
"You too?"
"Well, yes." Kakashi nodded. "Your… counterpart as well. That's why I thought that you wouldn't—"
Sakura groaned.
"She likes it…?" She asked, sounding as though she was reconsidering everything.
Naruto paid their conversation no mind and began browsing the selection of books again.
"Photography…?" Sakura finally asked him, with a dubious expression.
"What?" Naruto laughed. "One for Hanabi, one for Yoisen. It's not like she's going to want to learn much about modern architecture — she's a bit… old-fashioned."
"More like ancient-fashioned." Sakura chuckled. "Woman's older than the Nine-Tails."
"Don't say it in front of her."
"Of course not. Who knows what sort of devilish tricks she has learned over the centuries…"
"…Yoisen…?" Kakashi asked. "Like the island…?"
"Don't sweat it." Sakura waved off.
"You know the island…?" Naruto asked him.
"My mother was from the Eastern Land of Fire." Kakashi said vaguely. "A person, then…?"
"Yes." Naruto nodded.
"Nobody very interesting." Sakura waved off. "A Kaguya wannabe."
"You know about Kaguya?" Kakashi asked her.
"My mother was from Eastern Konoha." Sakura mocked him.
Kakashi sighed. "…I guess that's deserved."
"Yoisen's my immortal pen-pal." Naruto smiled.
"…I get the feeling you're mocking me." Kakashi squinted his eyes.
"Why would I…?" Naruto asked. "It's not like you did the same thing for the entire time I studied under you."
"Ah, but that's where you are confused." Kakashi wagged his finger. "I never was your sensei."
"Same thing, really." Naruto shrugged. "You can't call me your murderer, then. It goes both ways."
Kakashi squinted. "You're good."
"…You're comparing me to your Naruto."
"What's wrong with that?"
Naruto just stared at him.
Uchiha Household.
"—absolutely insufferable."
"—the way she just kept on goading me, too."
"—but he is worse."
"—she has no manners."
Uchiha Sarada just sat at the dinner table, silently.
This… wasn't how she had pictured her father's return. The only thing he and her mom were talking about were these strangers from another world.
She didn't begin to massage her temples, despite how much she wanted to. Sarada plastered a hesitant smile on her face and just nodded politely.
When she had asked them about yesterday night, she hadn't expected something like this.
They had been talking over each other for close to ten minutes, each of them looking more agitated by the minute.
'Why can't Dad be more like Lord Seventh…?' Sarada mused, not for the first time.
She was sure that Boruto's dad had better things to do than rant about his other self. Well, she'd have to ask Boruto about it, anyway. It couldn't be worse than this, anyway.
"-shannaro, I have half a mind to show her how much I—"
"—nothing but a faker anyway."
Sarada's smile twitched angrily.
"—four wives! And the way this other me kept on flirting with him—"
"—Naruto, out of all people…"
He had been gone for years… and now this?
Shared house.
"—and that's the reason I don't give out autographs anymore." Toru concluded.
Hanabi smiled brightly. "And here I thought it was because you never learned how to write."
Toru rolled his eyes. "Very funny. I wrote a book."
"And I proofread it. Why do you think I'm saying this…?"
"Toru's book was fun." Karin stated.
"Thank you, Karin." He nodded graciously. "I guess I can give out one more autograph."
"It wasn't too bad." Yugito admitted.
"…I proofread it." Hanabi repeated. "That's why-"
There was a knock at the door.
"Are they back already…?" Toru frowned.
Karin shook her head. "Not exactly."
There was a voice coming from the other side of the door. A young boy.
"—I'm telling you I don't want to see your stupid friends."
A man laughed. "Boruto, I'm the stupid friend, don't be childish. If you want to insult them, call them psychopaths."
"…I still don't want to."
"I'm glad you can admit defeat." The Hokage nodded. "It's time you meet your uncle."
"…I have an uncle? That Sasuke guy…?"
"No." The Hokage laughed. "A new one. He's… my brother or so."
Boruto sighed. "I guess I could say hi." He muttered.
Karin opened the door.
"Hey there, Hokage." She greeted.
"Karin." He smiled. "You guys… This is my son Boruto. Say hi, Boruto."
"Hi." He muttered. Then he blinked. "…Hanabi-nee…? What are you doing here?"
"Sorry, Poruto." Hanabi simply said. "Not the woman you're looking for."
"But—"
"Where is uh… Indra?" The Hokage asked, craning his neck.
"Indra…?" Karin raised an eyebrow. That name mostly brought bad memories. "His name's Naruto."
Boruto frowned. He looked at his father, asking for an answer.
"It's a long story, Boruto." He clapped a hand on his son's shoulder.
"Stop treating me like a child."
The Hokage frowned. "But you are one, Boruto. Don't be in such a rush to grow up."
Boruto grumbled, and kicked the ground softly.
"Naruto is not here, no." Toru said.
"Ah." The Hokage frowned. "That's a shame, I wanted to—
"To pawn me off." Boruto grumbled. "So that you can go back to doing Hokage stuff."
"Of course not." The Hokage rolled his eyes fondly. "I already told you I won't need to do it all the time anymore." He pointed at his left eye.
"…Words are cheap, old man." Boruto looked away.
Yugito stood up and put a calming hand on Boruto's shoulder.
"I'm sure he means it." She said.
"…What makes you so sure?" He grumbled.
"I can see these things."
"That's just—"
"Actually see them, I mean." She smiled.
Boruto blushed and looked away.
"…If you say so." He mumbled.
The Hokage smiled. "I'm sure you're going to be a great mother, soon."
"Ah…" Yugito laughed. "I wouldn't know about that. Besides, he's the father, so…"
"Wait…" Boruto blinked. "Dad's brother—"
"He uh… is not exactly his brother." Toru frowned.
"Genetically speaking, he's even closer." Hanabi nodded. "Just like Neji was my half-brother, technically. Genetics..."
Toru tried to tell her to shut up through thought. She ignored him.
"So…" Boruto scrunched his face and Yugito wondered if their child would bear the same marks as he did. Likely. "I'm going to have—"
"A… cousin, I guess." The Hokage said, somewhat dubiously.
"A half-sibling." Hanabi corrected him.
Boruto looked between the two of them, trying to figure out what they were hiding from him, exactly.
"…Do you have a clone…?" Boruto frowned.
"Something like that." The Hokage shrugged.
"That's so cool." Boruto beamed. He turned to Yugito. "So he's your husband and all that?"
The Hokage's smile fell. If Boruto was corrupted by his counterpart's dubious morals—
"Oh boy." Toru muttered.
"Something like that." Yugito smiled tightly.
Boruto frowned. The red-haired woman was hiding a laugh, and the one who looked exactly like his aunt was not even trying to.
"...I'm not naive, 'yaknow." He said.
The Hokage chuckled dismissively.
"Of course not." He ruffled his hair.
"I know all about sex already, old man."
The Hokage froze. Hanabi tried to hide her chuckle by coughing.
"I…'m sorry?"
"I said—"
"Okay okay. I heard you the first time." The Hokage motioned for him to stop.
"Iwabe told us about it." Boruto nodded proudly. "And Koji told us that old enough to kill, old enough to—"
"Don't finish that sentence, son." The Hokage interjected. "And… I think I need to speak with your friends."
Boruto frowned. "Are you trying to have sex with them?"
The Hokage made a pained grimace. "I don't think you quite understood the concept, Boruto."
"Of course I do." Boruto scowled. "My friends can't have sex anyway, they're just kids. I know how this works."
Toru wheezed.
"...Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Whatever." The Hokage shook his head. "Uh… could you tell—"
"Naruto." Karin finished.
"…Yeah. Tell… him that we're looking for him."
"…You still want your son to meet him after this…?" Yugito asked in disbelief.
"…The worst's over." The Hokage nodded. He smiled, the slightest quirk of his lips. "I know other me will be a good influence on him."
"I don't need an influence, dad." Boruto grumbled.
"You clearly need better ones, though." The Hokage grumbled, throwing his son over his shoulder.
Boruto protested, because he wasn't a kid anymore.
If he was smiling, it was not because he actually enjoyed being carried by his dad, but because he knew that he would soon have a little sibling, of course. It didn't matter whether they stayed or not. He was not smiling because his dad was spending time with him, but because the weather was good today.
That was it.