Six Months, Two States
Disclaimer: The characters belong to the brilliant creative team of NCIS: Hawaii and no profit has been made from this story. Also, F you CBS, Paramount plus and everyone else who had a hand in screwing over the greatest cast in the history of network tv. #SaveNCISHawaii
A/N: At least the writers won't contradict whatever I come up with in this chapter, that's the only bright spot I've got. I hope y'all are taking care of yourselves, fighting for the cause if you can, and silently supporting it if you can't.
"Here's to hoping for a better tomorrow"
Good Morning, Good Tides, Goodbye
Despite falling asleep in front of the tv at almost two in the morning Kate still found herself wide awake and on the beach by five thirty, surfboard in tow as she trotted toward the water and spotted Chloe already bobbing in the gentle swell of the morning tide. What I wouldn't give for a good night's sleep and the energy to be the first in the water. Not a single soul in her world could possibly understand how gutting it was for her to view that live feed of the fireworks in Waikiki, just as nobody other than Lucy could possibly understand what that view of that event from that particular angle meant to her. Not for the first time, she wondered if everything about that evening was something the impossible to read brunette had conjured up on the spur of the moment, or if it was a move she used on all of the women she dated. The idea of Lucy with anyone else hit her, as always, like a punch in the stomach, and she hated everything and everyone that had a hand in conjuring up the horrible scenarios of the most amazing woman she'd ever met in the arms of someone else. The emotional drain of imagining Lucy somewhere on that screen, wrapped around another as they watched the display taunted her in her nightmares as she slumbered fitfully on the couch, but she refused to let what she couldn't control put a halt on her plans to surf that morning. Even Lucy in my bed couldn't stop me from surfing, I'm not going to let the thought of her in someone else's stop me either.
"Good morning," Chloe greeted as Kate paddled up beside her, "I was beginning to think that maybe that last round of drinks did you in!"
"It wasn't the drinks," Kate replied.
"Too excited about hitting the waves with actual competition this morning to sleep, huh?" Chloe asked, clearly trying to elicit a smile from her uncharacteristically sullen companion.
"Something like that," Kate deflected as she leaned forward and paddled into the swell, and Chloe was left to wonder what the hell had happened in the wee hours of the morning that had caused the shift in Kate's demeanor.
"Good Saturday morning ladies!" Raul called out as they ended their run and he waded in to join them, "Kate, did you enjoy my surprise?"
"What surprise?" Chloe asked, eyes narrowing as she wondered if the jovial man had somehow upset the morose blonde with whatever his surprise had been.
"I definitely did not have 'discover Waikiki livestream fireworks' on my bingo card last night," Kate replied, "how did you know about it?"
"I've been researching what to do in Honolulu for years," he admitted, "and when I saw them on an old rerun of Hawaii Five-0 I did a little digging and found out they do them every Friday night at the Hilton Hawaiian Village. Then I discovered the Waikiki Aquarium cam, and I couldn't help but wonder if it would catch the show. That time difference is killer, but I finally stayed up late enough one Friday to actually see it! Did you see them while you were there?"
"I did," she said with a tiny head bob, her eyes taking on a faraway look like she was picturing something that neither of them could possibly understand.
After an uncomfortably long moment of silence, during which he obviously hadn't sensed the tone, Raul prodded, "And?"
Snapping out of her reverie, Kate responded, "And what?"
"You're killing me Kate," he groaned, "I need details! How was the show? Did you enjoy it? Was it worth making time for? Was it hard to find parking?"
"The show was amazing! We watched it from the hotel balcony, so parking wasn't an issue," she explained, blushing with an impossible to stop smile as she thought about what had happened on that balcony, "it was definitely one of my favorite experiences in Waikiki."
As she mounted her board and paddled off, Raul looked at Chloe and said, "Whoever it was that "complicated" things in Hawaii? If he makes her react like that with just a thought, I'm afraid poor Cory doesn't stand a chance."
No more words were said as they threw themselves into the intense waves that were churning after the previous day's storms, and once the sun was up and the beach started to fill up with the weekenders just arriving to start their vacations the trio decided to call it a day and head in. "That was awesome!" Chloe beamed as they rinsed off at the outdoor shower, "man am I going to miss you when you leave! It sucks that your time here is just ending as my full week is starting. Are you sure you can't stay a little longer?" The night before Chloe had explained that visiting her boyfriend, who was stationed at NAS JAX, was what had brought her and their merry band of travelers to Florida. He had been on leave until last night, when he had returned to duty and Chloe had joined her brother and their friends for the rest of their vacation.
"I cannot," Kate said with a wistful sigh, though in truth she knew she could extend her stay if she really wanted to, "duty calls."
"Speaking of which," Raul whispered as he spotted his wife heading their way, "I was never here!" He then took off running, disappearing around the side of the building as the stunning Latina approached.
"Have you ladies seen my wayward husband?" Isabel greeted, and they loudly said, "No, no ma'am!" as they pointed in the direction that he had run.
Laughing as the clearly irritated woman walked away in the direction her husband had gone, Chloe looked at Kate and offered, "You know we're only a few hours drive from DC, right?"
"I do."
"I'd offer to give you our address, but if I know my brother-"
"I have it," Kate chuckled, remembering her surprise when the paper airplane containing the information came flying onto her balcony, "and his phone number."
"The perils of being in the unit below the aerospace engineer nerd," Chloe laughed as she rolled her eyes, "but he's harmless and honestly, we would love to have you come and stay with us whenever you need some vitamin sea."
"I appreciate that," Kate said, beaming at the thought of having a place close enough to drive to when she felt the pull of the ocean.
"My god Kate Whistler, you're gorgeous!" Chloe teased as they walked companionably up to return their boards, "When you smile like that even my straight girl heart skips a beat. What time is your flight?"
Blushing at the unexpected compliment, Kate ducked her head and replied, "My flight's at two."
"Well enjoy your last few hours in paradise," Chloe smiled, "and if I don't see you before you go, safe travels."
Bidding her companion goodbye, Kate got off the elevator at her floor and shook her head at the realization that before Hawaii, she would have also thought of this place as paradise. Now it's just another city by the ocean. She also had to admit that she most likely would not have spoken to the outgoing twins, let alone spent any time with them or made plans to visit in the future. You should be grateful for the changes that Lucy inspired in you, maybe that's why the universe threw her into your path. A reason, a season or a lifetime, right? Well, three days doesn't equal a season or a lifetime, so it must be that there was a reason. God, I wish it was either of the other two. I'd give anything for one more day. Sighing in defeat, Kate headed into her condo and, after a refreshing shower and light breakfast she grabbed her laptop. Her flight was currently showing as on time, and while she sipped on her coffee and scrolled through the emails in her work folder she could see that there was nothing new that needed her immediate attention. Great job in my absence Seth, I'm proud of you. She closed her laptop and finished packing, then stifled a yawn as a sudden wave of sleepiness hit her. Admitting that the combination of the late night, fitful sleep and early morning workout had finally caught up with her, she glanced at the time and realized it was only a little past eight. Plenty of time for at least a power nap, she thought, setting an alarm and crawling into the incredibly comfortable king sized bed.
As she felt the pull of sleep her thoughts were solidly on that night in Waikiki, on a candlelit balcony where Honolulu's best pizza wasn't the only thing on the menu, a borrowed white shirt taunted her with illicit flashes of sexy mocha skin, and the spectacular display of fireworks paled in comparison to the volatile, sexually charged explosion of passion that burned between herself and the sassiest, sexiest, most maddeningly unpredictable woman she had ever met.
Ala Moana Boulevard, Waikiki
"I got her!" Jake, Jesse Boone's young son, shouted triumphantly at Lucy, who beamed at the excited boy as he bounced around in fist-pumping celebration.
"Let me see!" She excitedly requested as she ran up to him, his enthusiasm infectious as she peered at the screen and said, "Seriously? That's the elusive Comfey? It looks like a lei!"
"She is a living lei," Jake hotly replied, clearly offended by the lack of respect for his elusive catch, "and she's amazing."
Lucy drew back and looked at the offended little boy, then offered, "You know what? You're right, she is amazing, and after ten hard weeks of disappointment you finally caught her! Wanna celebrate with ice cream?"
"Heck yeah!" He agreed, smiling from ear to ear as he followed her back to her car, "Can we get Dole Whip?"
"Yes sir!" She saluted as she pulled on her sunglasses and started the car, "Anything for the king of the Pokemon!"
"Can we get it at Barefoot?" The boy innocently asked, and Lucy lied, "I didn't see any parking there, but there's always a spot at the mall. Food court ok with you?"
"I guess," he grumped as he slouched in his seat, and she knew that he preferred to sit on the wall facing the ocean while he enjoyed his ice cream but she could not bring herself to voluntarily go back to Barefoot Beach Cafe' since Kate had left the island. I'm sorry buddy, I know you're disappointed but I just can't. That last time I had to go there for a case it nearly killed me. Jake was just a child, so he couldn't possibly know or understand what Lucy was going through. He didn't know, and neither did his father, that every single time she picked him up for their Saturday Poke' hunt she was marking another week since she had last seen Kate. Ten weeks since I last saw you, ten Saturdays since our last goodbye. I'd give anything for one more Saturday like that, one more chance to try to convince you to stay. Why didn't I try? Why didn't I get your number? God I miss you.
"So it's pretty cool that you finally caught the last of your top ten Pokemon," Lucy observed as they sat in the food court and ate their frozen treats, "and I know that you're super excited about catching Comfey, but I feel like she's not your favorite."
"She's not," Jake admitted.
"Okay, so who is?"
While they sat and finished their snack Jake explained that "as a kid" his favorite Pokemon was Pikachu, but as he grew up and became more involved in the gaming aspect he realized that it was just dumb not to evolve your Pikachu, so he eventually acquired a "Thunder Stone" and evolved his little guy into his final form, Raichu.
"So Raichu is your favorite?" she surmised.
"He is!" Jake beamed, basking in the attention of his favorite human outside of his family, "He's so strong, he's my best fighter!"
Lucy smiled at the little boy, remembering how important it had always been for her to feel like she'd been heard. Growing up in a large and wealthy family she had often felt unseen, as if her needs and the things that she cared about didn't really matter, and as a child she had vowed to make sure that when she grew up she would always talk to children as tiny humans with valid interests and feelings. "Time to get you home slugger," she announced as she stood and carried their trash to the garbage can, "don't want our star second baseman to be late for practice."
You Can Run
After dropping Jake off and declining to join the Boones for dinner later, Lucy headed back to the tiny apartment she'd rented and made another red X through another Saturday on the calendar hanging above the microwave cart in the tiny nook that was her kitchen. In the corner of the date she wrote the number ten, then stood and stared at the blasted red ink on the Saturdays on the page that had the tiny 8,9,10 in their lower right corners. Am I ever going to get over you? When am I going to stop thinking about you, stop missing you, stop wondering where you are and what you're doing? Sighing as she stood there and tapped the pen against her chin, she threw herself headlong into the misery of admitting that it wasn't so much what Kate was doing, it was who she was doing it with. Thoughts of the tall, sexier than any human had a right to be blonde making love to another taunted her, attacked her in her sleep and in her quiet moments when she was alone and had no noise and no distractions and nothing to think about except that Kate was too special, too insanely gorgeous and too irresistibly sexy to be single for long. It had been ten weeks, two and a half months, and Lucy knew deep down inside that Kate's seemingly insatiable sexual appetite had to be slaked. A woman like that would definitely not last this long without taking another lover. God Lucy, you've got to let this go.
Deciding that no good could come from staying inside a moment longer, Lucy made up her mind that it would be a great idea to take advantage of the rare cooler day and go for a run. She changed into her comfy gym clothes, popped in her earbuds and headed out the door. After a thorough stretch she took off at a steady pace, losing herself in the music as the breathtaking scenery became nothing more than a blur of motion while she ran.
She ran automatically, her body giving into muscle memory as she raced down Ohua to Kalakaua Avenue. She turned right, always right, because there were no memories to taunt her when she went in that direction. At the 2.5 mile mark she turned around and headed back, and as she pulled up on the Duke statue she was hit with a sudden cramp that slowed her pace and doubled her over in pain. Damn Dole Whip!
"Agent Tara?"
"Yup," Lucy responded in a strained voice.
"Agent Reyes, C-GIS. Are you ok?"
When Lucy just nodded without straightening up the other woman took pity and handed her a bottle of water, suggesting, "Maybe you should take a break?"
"Thanks," Lucy said as she allowed herself to be steered to a bench, where she carefully sipped on the water and took shallow breaths and willed the wave of pain pass.
"Do you need an ambulance?" The concerned agent asked, to which Lucy vehemently shook her head and said, "No, but if you have any dumbass awards lying around I'll gladly take one."
"Come again?"
Lucy chuckled at the confused look on the other woman's face, then rolled her eyes and admitted, "I had a large Dole Whip right before my run."
"Ouch," Reyes sympathized, patting her pockets as she offered, "looks like I'm fresh out of dumbass awards, but I could lend a sympathetic ear if you want to talk about it?"
At Lucy's silent side-eyed response the CGIS agent surmised, "Poorly timed runs are usually therapy sessions."
Lucy assessed the look of concern on CGIS Agent Angel Reyes's face and considered just telling her the truth. Agent Reyes had come to the island at right about the same time as her, and though they had only worked a single case together Lucy had grown to like and respect her both on the job and as a person. So maybe I just tell you that I fell madly, stupidly, head over heels in love with a woman I barely know, that she ruined this island for me when she left, and that I just need to keep moving so everything is a blur and I can't recognize the places we went and the things that we did? I should totally confide in you, you're a decent person and a good colleague but I don't see you often enough to regularly chat about what's really going on with me. I'll probably feel better if I just talk about it, about her- "So how's Cece liking her new school?" Or that.
Angel's face lit up at the mention of her daughter, who she had confided to Lucy was nervous about fitting in at her new school. "She's doing great! She loves her teacher, she immediately made friends and to be honest her six year old social life is driving me crazy! She's at Surfrider right now at a dance competition," she explained, "and I had just stepped out for a five minute sanity break when I noticed you. Are you sure you're ok? Cee will be in there for hours and Javie is with her, I could give you a ride or-"
"I'm good," the brunette insisted, "see?" She said as she stood, barely flinching as she straightened up, "But I think I owe you a bottle of water."
"Girl I snagged that from the hospitality table at the hotel," Reyes laughed, "I'm just glad it came in clutch for you! But seriously," the ebony skinned agent asked, "why were you running on a full stomach?"
Lucy, who had been jogging in place, shook out her arms and threw her head back and asked, "Has this island ever just felt too small to you?"
"Not for me," Angel admitted, "but I also spend most of my time on the water. When you're out there all day there's not much time to feel trapped on the land. I could take you out on the boat whenever-"
"Yep. Nope. Let me stop you right there," Lucy interrupted, "me and the water, we don't get along."
"Really?" Reyes asked, sizing up the junior agent as she admitted, "I never thought you would be afraid of the water. In all honesty I never thought you'd be afraid of anything. Didn't you have to pass water training at FLETC?"
"I did what I had to do to pass, but I barely passed," Lucy admitted, "then me and the water broke up and we've been apart ever since."
"Interesting. So," the CGIS agent stated, "I'm going to suggest that you just ignore the official nomination you're going to receive in the near future."
"What's that now?" Lucy asked.
"After I worked with you I thought you would be a great fit for the NCIS Agent Afloat program," Reyes explained, "so I nominated you."
"Agent a what?" Lucy, who obviously had no idea the position existed, questioned.
"Agent afloat," Reyes laughed, "Think small town sheriff. But since you work for the Navy, that town is floating."
"Literally floating? Like, on a SHIP?" An incredulous Lucy asked.
"A carrier, more precisely," Angel explained, "and honestly they're so massive you don't even know you're on the water."
"Until it sinks or I fall overboard and drown!" A horrified Lucy gasped.
"To be fair the impact would probably kill you if you fell."
"Oh no, I've seen "The Indianapolis", I know what can happen," Lucy insisted, visibly shaken as she considered life at sea, "that is one position I can safely say I have no interest in."
"Too bad," Reyes admitted, "because it's an honor to be chosen and looks great on your resume. Plus it's a six month chance to be your own boss, call the shots and see how well you can lead without a direct report onboard."
"Hard pass, but thank you for thinking of me," Lucy replied, then exclaimed, "Wait! That nomination, can you rescind it? Are they going to place me on a wait queue, like if the person in line before me can't do it I have to go?"
At the junior agent's panicked expression, Reyes placed a calming hand on arm and soothed, "Relax Agent Tara, the nomination is only the first step. There are a series of applications, evaluations and peer recommendations required to complete the process. Like I said before, just ignore it and it will go away. But if you ever change your mind, you've always got my vote."
"So anyhow," Lucy deflected, "your daughter is probably wondering where you went, and I suddenly feel one hundred percent better, so I should probably head home. Thanks again, for helping," she smiled, "and I guess I'll see you around?"
"Count on it," Angel smiled, then shook her head in exasperation when she spotted her husband, Javier, walking their way.
"Hey baby, you just gonna leave me in there with Dance Moms gone wild? I can't..." was all Lucy heard before she darted across Kalakaua and beelined for Ohua. This island might feel too small, too overrun with memories of Kate, but it will never be small enough to run me off the land and onto a ship no matter how big that ship is.
The renewed energy that had ignited her run was a massive endorphin hit for the brunette, so she darted past her home and kept on running until she reached the canal. She never ran in this direction, and she was surprised to see that it was much less overrun with tourists than the main drag by the ocean. The added bonus was that she hadn't come in this direction at all while with Kate, which made up her mind that from now on this was the direction she would run. No memories of Kate are better than seeing her everywhere on that beach. God, I miss her. I was a fool to just let go like that. I wonder if she feels the same, if she has as many regrets as I do? Does she miss me at all? Does she think about me, wonder if I've moved on? I really wish I could move on. I wish I didn't miss her, wish I didn't wonder where she was and what she was doing right now.
What She's Doing Now
"Lucy, I need you now."
"Where do you need me?"
"Here," Kate breathed as she slid her own hand down to ease the throbbing in her clit, "Lucy, please..."
Kate cried out in pleasure as a hot, hungry mouth descended on her exposed sex, ardent lips closing on her desperately thrusting fingers as the warm velvet of the brunette's tongue flattened against the engorged pink pearl pulsing between them. When Kate went to pull her fingers away Lucy's hand wrapped around her wrist, stilling her withdrawal and gently urging her to continue. "It's so hot when you touch yourself," Lucy drawled in a thickly accented whisper, "god, you taste so good."
"Oh god," Kate groaned, her hips bucking uncontrollably under the sensual onslaught of lips and tongue, "I'm so close, Lucy I-"
"Aren't you going to get that?" Lucy asked as she abruptly pulled away.
"Get what?" A breathless Kate gasped, her hand sinking into thick black hair and desperately urging the brunette to return to her intimate assault.
"The phone silly, can't you hear it ringing?"
"No," Kate growled, "God Lucy, your mouth, please."
As Lucy's lips returned to latch onto the glistening digits Kate found it slightly distracting that the hotel phone kept ringing, and as she felt the sweet suction of Lucy's mouth she pressed harder, felt the climax coming. "Oh my god, Lucy, more," she breathed. The distracting noise kept clawing for her attention as she threw her head back in pleasure and-
"Crap!" Kate exclaimed, eyes flying open as the noise pulled her from the incredibly vivid dream. Where am I? Looking around she slowly became aware of her surroundings, recognized the room in the condo in Florida and that the blaring of the alarm was announcing that it was time for her to get up and go.
She also became aware of the fact that her fingers were buried in her panties, intimately pressed against her throbbing sex. Some dream. Experimentally applying pressure, she gasped at the sudden jolt of pleasure it elicited. Increasing her movements, she slid her fingers through the warm silk and slowly picked up the pace as she closed her eyes and pictured sweet, sexy Lucy stretched out between her legs. "Oh god Lucy, yes, just like that," she moaned, crying out in astounded pleasure as a wave of genuine release coursed through her body. Was it as soul shredding as actually having sex with Lucy? Of course not, but it was an unexpected solution to going without until she could work out the reality of life and love after Lucy. It's still too fresh Kate, it'll get easier with time until eventually you can move on.
Will you ever move on?
Looking around the beautifully appointed rental with it's fresh, beach themed colors and designs, she had to admit that just three months ago the opportunity to live and work with the ocean in her backyard would have been exactly what she wanted, and she was honestly astounded that she had so easily turned the opportunity down. It wouldn't be fair to Director Mullins, I would leave in an instant if a position in Hawaii opened up. I like Mullins, a lot, but he deserves to build his team around someone who's in it for the long haul.
Sighing as she considered that she had literally turned down a dream job because of a feeling, a...crush? Infatuation? Obsession? What did one label a three day tryst that changed everything? She wasn't foolish enough to believe that they were in love, you couldn't truly fall in love in such a short period of time. But something that couldn't be named had transpired between them, something that went deeper than the mere physical acts of lovemaking that had shaken them to their very cores and created a constant craving for more. And you threw it away because you were afraid that trying to maintain it long distance would hurt too much. Would it really be worse than this?
As Kate freshened up and prepared to leave she couldn't stop thinking about Lucy, couldn't stop imagining seeing her via FaceTime or hearing her voice every day. But the idea that inevitably the 4,826 miles between them would mean that she would call one day and see or hear whoever Lucy was dating was enough to firm her resolve that yes, they had made the right decision. Being without her is miserable, but seeing her loving someone else? That would be unbearable.
Can We Talk?
"Hey, what are you doing here?" A surprised Lucy smiled as she jogged up to her apartment and saw Heather Boone sitting on her steps.
"I brought you a plate," Jesse's wife offered as she held up the foil wrapped meal, "and I thought maybe we could talk?"
"Oooo-kay," Lucy replied, wondering what in the world the woman could possibly want to talk to her about, "is something wrong with Jake? Was it the Dole Whip? Because I'm pretty sure it caused me to-"
"Jake's fine," Heather soothed, "I'm pretty sure he's got Dole Whip in his veins. This however," she said as she pointed to the food, "won't be for much longer if we don't get it in the fridge. Can we go inside?"
"Sure, yup," Lucy replied, pulling out her key and unlocking the door, "come on in."
"Wow," Heather said as she followed the young agent inside and looked around the tiny space, "Jesse wasn't kidding."
"I know it's small," Lucy admitted as she took the plate and placed it in the refrigerator, "I just didn't really have time to find something bigger. It's only temporary until-"
"Lucy."
The mom tone in Heather's voice stopped the young brunette dead in her tracks, and she grabbed two cans of sparkling water from the fridge, offering one to the older woman as she responded, "Yeah?"
"I'm not going to insult you or me by asking questions that we both know the answers to, and I'm not going to put you into an awkward position where you feel the need to lie or deflect to conceal the truth. Instead, I'm going to tell you a story."
Lucy silently stared at the floor, feeling like a fraud because she knew that her former landlord's son was on Jake's baseball team, so Heather probably knew that she had lied about being kicked out. "Look, I'm sorry, I just-"
"I was in my senior year of college at Georgetown University," Heather began, effectively silencing whatever lie Lucy had been about to tell, "playing the entitlement game with my sophisticated, wealthy friends. We saw ourselves as the living embodiment of that eighties movie 'St. Elmo's Fire'," she chuckled, "god, we were insufferable! So we were out one night, blowing off steam from our finals, when we heard that this student, Jessica Gains, had been murdered. It was a week before graduation and we were actually upset that this woman's murder was bringing a large police presence into our world because we had worked SO hard for this time, this moment of celebration, and the inconvenience of her death was ruining our party."
Staring in disbelief, Lucy's jaw dropped as she tried to picture the supermom, outdoor loving perfect wife of her friend and mentor as the person she was currently describing.
"Close your mouth you'll catch a fly," Heather laughed, "there's a lot about me you don't know."
"I had no idea that you and I," Lucy stammered, "we-"
"Had such similar backgrounds?"
"Something like that," Lucy admitted, "you seem so different from that world."
"As do you," the older woman responded, "who I was doesn't define who I am. Just like you, I chose my own path."
As she always seemed to so effortlessly do, Heather paused a beat to give the younger woman a chance to digest what she had just learned. Sweet Lucy, there's so much out there to bring you joy, I hate to see you so sad all the time.
From the moment they had met, that first time that Jesse had dragged a reluctant Lucy home to dinner with his family, the young agent had felt at ease with the older woman. In her mind it was because Heather was everything that her own mother was not - she was warm, loving and attentive, and she made the young agent feel safe, included, and valued in a way that her own family had never made her feel. Lucy also admired her dedication to her career, her intelligence, and her fearless pursuit of any and all outdoor activities. "Jesse can have the sun, sand and surf," she had once joked, "I prefer the mountains and the trails." Heather didn't have the same deep and abiding fear of the water that Lucy had but she did prefer dry land, which was another solid reason the young Texan felt such a kinship with her.
"So anyhow," Heather continued, deciding that Lucy had had enough time to process her admission, "we were just leaving the Tombs, this preppy hot spot, when these two cops approached us. They asked where we had been, what we had heard, did we know this Jessica Gains? I hadn't seen or heard anything and had no connection at all to the victim, but none of that came out of my mouth because I was struck mute by the vision of the young cop who was questioning me." The auburn beauty's face transformed into that of a lovesick schoolgirl, her eyes taking on a faraway, dreamy look as she reminisced, "Oh Lucy, he was the most magnificent human I had ever seen. I think I heard one of my friends say he had a class with the murdered girl, and I'm pretty sure another said she lived on her street, but all I could do was stare at this perfect man and wonder where he had been my entire life. When I turned to leave I stumbled and he caught me and I swear to you that when my body collided with his I felt electrified, like I was going to spontaneously combust with the intensity of what that accidental touch had caused me to feel. I was almost certain, from the look on his face, that he felt it too, and I knew in that moment that he was the one.
That entire week, my last week of college, felt like the longest week of my life. That cop was constantly on campus and I was constantly running into him, and each time I did I felt more alive than I had the time before. And I was conflicted, because he was this blue collar cop and I was this privileged, stuck up soon to be Ivy League graduate, but I couldn't help what I felt. I actually craved him, Lucy, and I realized during that fateful week that nothing in my life was ever going to matter if I couldn't share it with him. So I turned down the job I had waiting for me in Africa, where I had received a grant to study game theory in the wild," she explained, "and I took a job at the Smithsonian instead."
Stunned, Lucy asked, "Do you regret it?"
"No," the older woman immediately replied, "being with him was, or rather is, everything."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I think you need to hear it."
"I'm fine," Lucy insisted, her head bowed as silent tears softly spattered the floor.
"You don't look fine."
"It's an ongoing process," Lucy deflected, "some days are better than others."
"So call her."
"I can't."
"Give me your phone, I'll do it for you."
"I don't have her number," Lucy whispered, so low Heather almost missed it.
"What do you mean you don't have her number?"
"We both knew it couldn't last, so..." Lucy shrugged, feeling cheap and foolish as she struggled to explain that the idea of a fun little fling seemed perfect at the time.
Oh sweetie, you are so deluded. "You're literally a professional investigator, how hard could it be to find her?"
"I would be lying if I said I hadn't considered it," Lucy admitted, "but that would be an abuse of power and a violation of professional etiquette that I just couldn't justify. Unfortunately for me, there was not a Navy crime at the airport on the day she flew out, so I have no right to pull surveillance videos or flight logs."
"What about her lodging? Did she stay at a hotel?"
"She did."
"And?"
Sighing in defeat, Lucy turned and dropped onto the couch and replied, "The room wasn't registered to her name." She also insisted on using cash everywhere we went, seemed very hung up on not leaving a digital trail and made reservations at the hotel restaurant using the name the room was registered to.
"What does that tell you Lucy?"
"It tells me that she has a girlfriend or wife back in DC who probably booked the room to her credit card."
Oh Lucy. "And you don't want to keep digging because you don't want to know the truth."
"I don't want to talk about this any more," Lucy deflected as she swiped the tears from her face, "did you come here to make me cry? Because if you did-"
"I came here to bring you dinner," Heather insisted, "and to check on you. Seriously, Lucy Tara doesn't say no to food!"
"Unless she already has dinner plans," Lucy suggested, her voice tinged with amusement.
"Unless she already has - oh my goodness Lucy, I'm sorry! I totally misread the situation! You probably need to be getting ready and here I am going on about my past and trying to make you feel better when you're literally going on a date. Wait, why didn't you just tell us?"
"I know Jake has a little crush on me," Lucy lied, "so..."
"So you didn't want to say it in front of him and hurt his feelings," Heather surmised, "right?"
"Right. So thank you, for the food," Lucy smiled, "and for checking in. I appreciate it."
"You're welcome," Heather responded as Lucy walked her to the door. Thinking about the red marks she'd seen on the calendar, she paused in the doorway and contemplated whether or not to let Lucy get away with pretending that everything was fine. I bet if I parked around the corner and waited I wouldn't see her leave.
"Hey Lucy?"
"Yeah?"
"I hope you have fun tonight."
"Yeah," Lucy said as she shut the door behind her, "me too."
A hui hou