Chapter 2: Speak With One Voice

Her eyes were still filmy with sleep when she awoke on October 29th, telling her that while she at some point must have fallen asleep, she had not slept very well.

Sitting up blearily, Courteney ran a tired hand down her face, her mind replaying the events of the previous afternoon. A small section of her mind was desperately clinging to denial, that perhaps she had dreamt the entire thing, a vivid nightmare fueled by a deep-seated fear that had been ever present for years.

Her body felt like lead as she swung out of bed and padded at a stumble out onto the second floor and then down the stairs. She could hear voices at a volume that suggested to her that the TV was going.

She found her daughter seated on the couch, watching TV while thumbing through her phone at the same time, the way millennials of her generation did so expertly.

Courteney glanced to the bright images and colors and music coming from the TV screen. "What's this?"

"I have to watch it for a class," Coco stated flatly, pointing the remote at the screen and pausing the movie. The image froze so that what appeared to be Kevin Kline was comically suspended mid-leap, all while dressed in a ridiculous tunic. Coco made a few notes in a pad with one hand while still doom-scrolling along on her phone with the other.

"Social media's going insane right now…." Coco murmured sympathetically. "People are leaving momentos in front of the exterior of the apartment building." She pushed her phone across the coffee table to her mother. Courteney picked it up: there was a Facebook photo here showing the sidewalk in front of Bedford and Grove streets in Manhattan, where the exterior shots of Chandler and Monica's apartment had always been filmed, mostly for transitional shots leading into apartment scenes. The sidewalk in front of the corner building was now buried in momentos and trinkets. Stuffed animals and a thousand other tokens. Handwritten notes. There appeared to be enough of a pile that would prevent people from walking along the sidewalk there. Courteney's breath hitched and her eyes swam with tears, moved. Lifting her gaze to her daughter, Coco just pursed her lips grimly. Courteney quickly handed her phone back.

"Trade ya." Coco now passed her mother her own phone. "It's been beeping pretty consistently ever since sunrise. Woke me up, and I didn't want it to wake you…." She cringed. "You have a lot of texts."

Courteney thumbed through the text messages. Plenty of them were from people she knew in the industry. Acquaintances. Other celebs. The thread that caught her eye the most and the quickest was the Friends text group thread.

There were dozens of text bubbles, and she had to scroll back quite a bit just to reach the ones she had briefly seen coming in last night when the devastating news had broken.

Schwimmer: Does anyone know what the H-E-double-toothpicks HAPPENED?!

Jenny: I don't KNOW! I was in contact with him this morning!

MLB: I've called LAPD. All I got was boilerplate bullshit.

MLB: Anybody got contact info on Morrison?

Lisa: Who?

Schwimmer: Jen, what are you talking about? In contact with who?

(Jenny appeared not to have answered right away).

Lisa: In contact with WHOM, David.

Schwimmer: Not now, Lisa.

MLB: LisaKudrow, the Dateline guy!

Lisa: LeBlanc, why would the Dateline guy help us?

Schwimmer: I got CNN going – they're saying it was an accident.

Jenny: I texted him just this morning!

Lisa: Schwimmer Oh, yeah, that's a big help! No shit it was an accident!

Lisa: Jenny, you mean you texted Morrison?

Jenny: Who?

MLB: The Dateline guy.

Jenny: Matt, honey, why would the Dateline guy….? Oh yeah, nm.

Jenny: No, I didn't text Keith Morrison.

Schwimmer: Well, could somebody get in touch with him? He IS his stepfather.

Jenny: … I was texting with Matty this morning.

Lisa: Oh, baby, I'm so sorry! (Wailing emoji)

MLB: Has anyone heard from CC yet?

Courteney jerked at this, quickly thumbing down to the bottom of the thread and typing: "I'm here." A beat, then she added. "I don't know what to do. I can't…" She didn't finish the thread, aside from adding several wailing emojis in a row. Then she scrolled back to where she had left off in the conversation.

Lisa: Boys, while I appreciate the idea, KM probably knows about as little as the cops do.

Jenny: Yeah, the family is probably being briefed right now. We can't bother them.

Schwimmer: I don't care who we get information from! We need to hear something from SOMEBODY! The cops have to give us something!

Jenny: David, hon, it's still early!

Schwimmer: Was Matty affiliated with a particular rehab facility? Maybe we can place a call there. Who was his sober living companion?

MLB: Yeah. More to the point, where was she? What was she doing?!

Lisa: I can tell you what she wasn't doing – her JOB!

Even as she was reading and catching up, Courteney saw and heard the beeps of a new flurry of incoming texts along not only the Friends group thread, but from other folks as well: some numbers she recognized, many more she didn't. A personal text from Jenny, just to her, caught her notice:

'Sweetheart, I'm coming. I'm coming over right now'.

'…. I've got my arms around you'.

Courteney felt a lump gather in her throat, and she tapped out: 'Coco is here. She drove back last night.'

It was a minute or two before Jenny pinged back: 'God bless that girl.'

Instagram was the exact same story: an utter avalanche of condolences and shout-outs. Millions of fans – complete strangers – were tagging her Instagram handle, offering condolences:

courteneycoxofficial When you're a widow but not really…. (Cry emoji, cry emoji, cry emoji)

Yeah, she must be so devastated... courteneycoxofficial

This and other messages like this were followed by GIFs of her and Matty kissing: Chandler and Monica's first kiss in the apartment, their kiss in London. Their wedding kiss….

A film of moisture was keeping her from reading further, and Courteney frantically wiped at her eyes. She could feel Coco's concerned gaze on her, but didn't acknowledge it beyond: "I'm fine, honey, I'm fine…" It was a lie, and mother and daughter both knew it. Courteney gestured weakly to the TV. "You can keep watching your… homework."

Coco resumed her movie, and strains of Gilbert and Sullivan began to fill the living room.

There was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it," Courteney sniffled. She clacked into the immaculate foyer and opened the door.

For a moment, she and her best girlfriend in the entire world froze, simply staring at each other. Then Courteney and Jennifer came apart all at once, collapsing into each other's arms and clutching fiercely. Courteney's sobs were fierce and bitter.

"Oh, GOD!... My Matty…."

"Come on…. come on, honey…. Inside…." Jennifer had to help her in and close the door behind them.

"Aunt Jenny?" Coco's voice wafted as she wandered into the foyer.

Jennifer smiled at her goddaughter. "Oh, pumpkin…." She half-disengaged from Courteney to hug her surrogate niece. "Thank you for stepping up…."

The three women trudged into the living room, where the Pirates of Penzance was still playing. At Jennifer's quizzical look, Courteney just gestured.

"Better than watching the news."

"I'm studying it for a class!" Coco offered up helpfully.

The trio paused behind the couch briefly to watch, if only to distract themselves from the hell that had come crashing down upon their heads. Jen let out a chuckle and shook her head, fanning herself.

"That Kevin Kline…"

Coco's face creased judgmentally. "Ew."

"Who's even the guy playing the….. Frederick person?"

"Rex Smith…" Courteney smiled. "He did some TV work, back in the day. I knew of him, vaguely." A beat, and then she laughed weakly. "God, this came out when I was your age!" She grinned at her daughter fondly.

Jennifer rubbed Courteney's arm. "Come on, hon…. Can we talk?"

"Yeah." The two older women slipped into the adjacent kitchen, leaving Coco to finish her watching assignment alone.

Courteney watched as Jennifer thumbed through her phone. The blonde woman then pushed her phone across the granite kitchen island, so that Courteney could read the email missive.

It was from the Friends producers: David Crane, Kevin Bright, Marta Kaufmann. The subject line simply read MATTY.

Courteney scanned it almost dully. When she reached the end, she tutted.

"Like any of us are in a place right now to say anything anyway. I mean…. God!" An alto, bitter sob flew from her and she dipped her face into her palm.

"Still…." Jenny's lips pursed sympathetically. "They're writing a statement for us right now. Our agents will forward it on for review and sign-off."

"Statement?" Courteney lifted her head.

"Just… acknowledging what's happened. But, the others and I were texting, and they all agree: we all have to take a step back. We have to speak with one voice. I don't think I could find the words on my own to say what…." Jenny choked up. "Do you?"

Courteney shook her head. "No."

Music wafted in from the next room: Linda Rosenstadt, as Mabel, was now launching into a beautiful ballad: "Ah, leave me not to pine, alone and desolate…."

"This is gonna sound so ironic, all things considered, and the son-of-a-bitch is probably laughing his ass off somewhere but… goddamnit, I need a drink," Jen grunted, turning for the fridge and pawing around in it.

Courteney smirked weakly. "Me too. Make it a double."

Jennifer nodded over her shoulder and began to frisk for the wine glasses. She poured the wine liberally, the two best friends staring at each other for a moment.

Swallowing hard, Jennifer let out a shaky breath and raised her glass. "To our better sixth…"

Courteney whimpered. "…. To our better sixth." They chinked glasses, sipping conservatively while listening to the beautiful music from over in the next room:

"He loves thee; he is gone…. Fa la la la…. Fa la la la…. He loves thee; he is gone…. Fa, la la la la…. La la…."

"Oh….. SHIT!"

The sound came out of Courteney in a yip, and there was a tinkling of glass as she smashed her wineglass down too hard on the countertop, hard enough for it to shatter and have wine spill everywhere; she ignored the mess, hardly noticed it. Courteney began to violently sob again, and Jennifer joined in with her.

"I just…. I can't believe…. He was fine! I texted him yesterday morning and he was fine! He was laughing, he was joking! Funny Matty… He seemed so happy! And now…" Jennifer began to pace, hands on her hips, lifting her eyes to the ceiling, blinking back moisture. "I should have just swung around to check on him. If I had just done something…"

"Jenny…."

"Maybe everything would have been different…."

"Jenny, stop it! No one could have done more for Matthew than you did! You could not have changed what happened!"

Lips pursed emotionally, Jennifer shook her head. "Maybe not, but…. I could have done something!" She started to weep again. "Some friend I was! And to think the man had feelings for me once!"

Courteney smiled softly, sadly. "He had excellent taste, our Matthew."

Jenny scoffed. "I know I shouldn't feel guilty – not on that score, but…" She took a deep, shuddering breath.

Courteney wrapped her best friend in a hug. "My dear Jenny Louise: if the solution to every man with an addiction problem was just a good woman to look after him, then addiction wouldn't even be a thing. We can't help who we fall in love with, any more than we can't help with who we don't." She stroked Jennifer's blonde hair. "He loved you, you know."

"Maybe. At one time." Jennifer turned to look at her dearest friend. "But I wasn't the one he was in love with." Her gaze had turned meaningful. Knowing. Almost too knowing.

Courteney blinked and let out a shaky little laugh. "I…. I don't know what you're talking about…."

"Oh, yes, you do…." Jenny chuckled. "Did you even watch any of his press junkets last year?"

"Yes, I did! Proudly. And I seem to recall the man saying he was crushing on all of us girls, at one point or another!"

Jenny snorted again. "Bet that was news to Lisa…."

"Floosh doesn't let that sort of stuff get to her," Courteney dismissed with a wave of her hand. She stared into the middle distance of her kitchen for a moment, lost in thought. In memory.

That stupid ballad from the Pirates of Penzance was still going on the godforsaken TV:

"He loves thee; he is here…. Fa, la la….. Fa, la la la…. He loves thee; he is here…."

Courteney lifted a trembling hand to her mouth, the tears coming fast with a vengeance yet again.

"CC…. You need to relax…."

Ironically, it was this soothing advice from her best girlfriend that caused Courteney to explode.

"How can I relax?!" She whirled around, flailing in anguish. "I just lost my husband!"

Jennifer's expression flickered in confusion. "What?"

Courteney faltered. "I…. I mean friend! I just lost my friend!"

"I just lost my friend too!" Jenny cried, pained. A beat, and she appraised Courteney up and down, a curious, wondering expression coming over the blonde's face. When she spoke next, there was a dazed quality to her voice.

"… You loved him, didn't you?"

"Of course I loved him! How could anyone not, God bless him?"

"That's not what I mean…." Jennifer shook her head, her voice quiet, yet firm at the same time. She stepped into her friend. "Court…."

"I…." Courteney's eyes darted about, suddenly feeling trapped. "I don't know…"

Jennifer just nodded sadly. "I think you do." Silence.

Courteney swallowed hard, and when she next spoke, her voice shook. "Matthew…. was a part of my life. A very important…. part of my life…. but that was a long…. time ago…" A pause. "He was my friend, Jenny! That's it."

"Bullshit," Jenny hissed on the edge of her breath.

"It's the truth!" Courteney gawped, staring.

"Then look me in the eye and tell me:" Jennifer stepped closer, searching her best friend's face. "…. Did you and Matty break the Pact?"

Courteney didn't see how that should matter: the Pact had only been in effect as long as the show had gone on, at least that was her implicit understanding. Still, she looked Jennifer squarely in the eye, as she replied, flatly:

"No…."

A/N: Trigger Warning: next chapter features a depiction of drowning. Read at your own risk.