AN: Thank you for all the support! It is very deeply appreciated!

If Wilford didn't love Hermione so much, he would have expelled Ron from his life long ago. He and his guest didn't deserve this level of boorishness. Still, if he kicked Ron out now, he'd cause a bigger scene than he already was. The things Wilford endured for his daughter...

"C'mon," Ron whined as he held up his plate, already containing five handfuls of chips, four spoonfuls of potato salad, three spoonfuls of coleslaw, and two steaks. Wilford couldn't help but notice he'd skipped the salad bar. At least his guests would have something to eat when all was said and done.

"Why can't I have three steaks right now?" Ron complained.

"Because there are several people in line behind you who need to be served as well," Wilford replied. "Your girlfriend and her friend are in the house as well, and would like something to eat when they return."

"So? The greasy git doesn't need any food and Hermione understands that if she's late to get food she won't get anything."

"Hermione is my daughter," Wilford snapped. "She will get food when everyone else does."

"What if you just start making her another steak now? Then when she gets out she can eat with us."

"Perhaps I would like to eat with everyone else."

"You can eat later."

"My guests would like to eat as well, meaning everyone only gets one or two steaks now so there's enough for everyone."

Ron rolled his eyes.

Wilford glanced around, hoping his daughter could defuse this situation when she came out.

"Can I have one more steak?" Ron whined.

He locked eyes with Ron. "You know, for a loving boyfriend, you are more interested in food than Hermione."

"Hermione will calm down eventually, but the food is getting cold."

"Yes, so you should move things along so that when Hermione comes out, she can have a warm steak."

"She can heat hers in the microwave, or she can take the greasy git's steak if there isn't enough," Ron argued. "I don't even know why he's here."

"He's here because I invited him," Wilford argued.

"I guess you'll have to make him a steak because I want a third one and Hermione needs a steak."

"I'm not doing that."

"Why?"

"I would like a chance to sit near my wife at some point so I can properly wish her a Happy Birthday."

"Why don't you wish her a Happy Birthday now, sing that song or whatever, and then make more steaks?"

"Would you get a move on?" Derek yelled from the back of the line. "Some of us want to eat here."

"I want to eat too," Ron called before raising his plate. "That's why I need a third steak!"

"You can't have one!"

The door slammed behind Wilford's daughter. Behind her was the man who was good to her, even if others considered him a git. From the fire in Hermione's eyes, it was clear Severus' talk had accomplished quite a bit, more than Wilford could have.

"'Mione?" Ron's eyes grew.

"You are not having another bite to eat!" She shouted.

"What do you mean I can't eat?" Ron whined.

"It means you're going home now." Hermione stood before him, Severus behind her.

"But I want my steak and my new beer."

"How many beers have you had?"

"Three, and I want a fourth."

Her face reddened. "I think you've had enough to drink."

"But I'm thirsty, and you said I could have a few beers."

"Four is too many."

"Then technically I've only had three beers. The second doesn't count because someone stole it when I was only halfway done."

"I don't care," she pointed to the door. "You're going home."

Ron stomped his foot on the ground. "But I want to stay here."

"I thought you didn't want to come here at all."

"I didn't, but now that there's food I want to stay."

"Well you can't." She took the paper plate full of food from him. "I'll wrap this up and let you take it home."

"Great," he followed her away from the line. "I didn't want to stay here anymore anyway. Your parents won't stop glaring at me."

"I wonder why," Hermione snarled.

"I don't know. They just don't like me."

"That makes three of us, because I don't like you either."

"What?" He shouted.

Wilford attempted to coax the next guest into taking her steak, but her eyes were glued to the scene near the front door. Considering that he was just as interested in the confrontation, he felt no need to hurry her along.

"You're going home and I'm staying here," Hermione argued.

"You actually want to stay with your parents and," Ron turned to Snape, "him?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Why would you want to spend an afternoon with Snape?"

"Because unlike you, he cares about my emotional well-being."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means," She shoved the plate into his chest. "I don't want you to contact me ever again."

"What?" He blurted out and grabbed the plate.

"You heard me," she argued. "I'm breaking up with you. As of right now, we're through."

"W-what?" He dropped the plate of food, some of which landed on his shoes.

"We're done," she argued. "We are no longer together."

"All because I said I didn't know if I wanted to marry you?"

"Yes, amongst other reasons."

He scowled.

"I don't want you to ever contact me again. If Harry invites us both to an event I will be cordial, but otherwise I will never speak to you again," her voice was firm, leaving little room for doubt.

"So you want to stay with your parents and," Ron gave Severus the side eye. "Him?"

Beside Wilford, a woman whispered into another woman's ear, "this is as entertaining as that movie about the son of a Nobel Prize winner who kidnapped himself."

The other woman nodded and hummed.

"Yes, I'm staying with him," she argued.

"So that's it, you're leaving me for," he glared at Snape, "the greasy git."

"His name is Severus, and you will show him some respect."

"You're standing up for him now too?"

She pointed to the door. "Get out!"

"Why, so you can be with him?"

"Yes!"

Ron's eyes widened. "Oh, I see what's going on."

"You've finally got it through your thick skull that we're through."

"No, this is about you and him."

Severus raised an eyebrow.

"You think I don't know that you go over to his house every Tuesday to 'research'." He snorted. "This whole time, you've been seducing Snape!"

"I said leave!" She argued.

"Yeah, get out of here!" Drusilla yelled

"Are we ever going to eat?" Kevin groaned.

A man poked an elbow into his side. Kevin winced before rubbing the area.

"Fine, be with the greasy git!" Ron stomped away. "Just don't be surprised if he bores you to death or your parents hate him more than they hate me."

"Actually we're quite fond of Severus!" Muriel shouted. "More fond of him than we are of you."

"Un-bloody-believable," Ron threw up his hands before storming away.

For a brief moment, the yard was quiet. Upon hearing a POP in the distance, Hermione then took a deep breath and smiled.

"I'm hungry, Severus," Hermione began. "Do you want to take our spot in line?"

"I would like that very much," His lips twitched upwards.

That's my girl, Wilford thought before serving the woman in front of him her steak.

"Thank you," Hermione said as Wilford put a steak on her plate.

"You're very welcome," he answered before kissing her on the forehead. "I'm proud of you, honey. You know that, right?"

"I know," she sighed. "And thanks for not saying, 'I told you so.'"

"I'd never do that."

She swallowed. "If I ever date another man like Ron, please tell me. I'll try harder to listen to you."

"I don't think you'll make that mistake again," he turned to Severus and winked.

Hermione tilted her head before turning to Severus. Although he shrugged, there was a gleam in his eyes.

"How are you feeling, honey?" Muriel stepped up to them.

"I'll be fine," she exhaled. "I'm just glad I didn't move in with the bastard. It would've been tricky to navigate moving out after all this."

"Indeed," Severus answered.

"Well we saved a spot for you two across from your mother and me," Wilford put a steak on Severus' plate.

"Are you certain you want me to sit there?" Severus asked. "Spots near the birthday person are often reserved for honored guests, much more honored than I am."

"I'm positive."

"Yes, we'd love to get to know you outside of Monopoly Mondays," Muriel grinned.

"I would like to get to know you better to, but Margaret…"

"Oh I understand," Margaret put a hand on his shoulder. She hung her head. "I was hoping it wasn't true, but it is."

"Hoping what wasn't true?" Hermione asked.

"Severus has been taken by another," Margaret shook her head. "I should've seen the signs, but I was too lost in a haze of lust to be honest with myself."

Wilford held back a chuckle as Severus squirmed.

"Still, we'll always have our conversation this afternoon. I will cherish the memory of us sharing our souls forever," Margaret sighed.

"Yes, I took pleasure in it too," he fidgeted.

"I think it's time for you to sit down, Margaret," Wilford answered in a soft voice.

"You," she wagged her finger at Hermione, "You take care of him. If I find out you're mistreating him, I'm not above offering him a shoulder to cry on and snatching him up for myself."

"I'll keep that in mind," she replied.

"Good," Margaret returned to her table.

Severus waited for Margaret to be out of earshot before stating, "Margaret is a very...intense woman."

"Margaret can be a little out there sometimes," Wilford answered. "But overall, she's pretty harmless."

"She is," Muriel answered. "She may be a little much when it comes to her emotions, but I'd be lost without her. When I need a shoulder to cry on, someone to rant to, or someone to share my joy with, she's always there. That's the nice thing about having a best friend since childhood."

"Indeed," Severus answered, wondering what it must be like to have a friend he could share everything with, one who would accept him as he was while encouraging him to strive to be better. After glancing at Hermione, he wondered if he'd found her.

"Knowing her, she'll meet someone at the airport who will be the next love of her life," Hermione replied.

"It is good to know I'm so replaceable," he grumbled.

"You're irreplaceable and you know it," Hermione put a hand on his shoulder.

"Alright, go ahead and sit down," Wilford chuckled. "We wouldn't want the frosting on your mother's cake to melt because we spent so much time talking and not enough time eating."

"No, we would not," Hermione began walking away.

"Oh, and Severus."

They turned around.

"Thank you for giving my baby girl a wonderful afternoon."

He relaxed. "The pleasure is all mine."

Severus had never had such a pleasurable time at a social event. Although he declined to play basketball with the others, he did agree to play corn hole. What he had not told anyone was that he had bought himself a corn hole set, and often played with it when bored.

After winning for the seventh time in a row, only Hermione wished to play with him.

Despite her best efforts, she could not defeat him. It mattered little though. They found other ways to amuse themselves, like putting up a net and playing volleyball with the other guests or hearing stories about Muriel's childhood. At one point, Muriel threatened to show baby pictures of Hermione. In turn, Hermione threaten to put her parents in the cheapest nursing home she could find.

Spending the day with Hermione had been more pleasant than he ever could've imagined. He didn't need to pretend to be kind to her, nor did he need to pretend that he wanted her to have the best afternoon possible. With her, he laughed in public more than he ever had in his life, and smiled more than he thought he was capable of doing. It warmed his heart to see her smile and laugh along with him. A few times, he even saw Wilford and Muriel glance over and give him approving looks.

It was after the third one he realized he would not mind becoming the man Hermione brought home to her parents, the one they enjoyed having around, the one who proved that while Hermione had questionable choices in men, he would do his best to ensure her faith in him was not misplaced. He could see himself remaining close to the Grangers for quite some time if they would allow him to do so.

After the sun had set, Kevin and Derek decided to make themselves useful. Kevin's parents were best friends with the mayor, meaning they received a permit to launch fireworks. While Severus was irritated that the bugs were beginning to come out, he couldn't help but feel his chest warm at Hermione's eyes lighting up.

As they sat at a table a safe distance away, Hermione turned to him. With a smile, she began, "I know my parents invited you here to lure me away from Ron."

"Excuse me?" He swallowed.

"I figured out why you were invited the third time you beat my dad at corn hole," she replied. "For him not to throw the bean bag in your face means that he really likes you. Then, I thought of the looks he's been giving you all day, and those that my mother has as well. It was clear they invited you here because they thought you would show me a better time than Ron ever could, that if I was around you enough I'd experience what it was like to have a caring man in my life."

He shook his head. Of course his ruse would be exposed. So much for his wonderful afternoon. He'd be lucky if Hermione ever spoke to him again.

"Thank you."

He looked up at her.

"Thank you for going along with it," Hermione continued. "I know my parents and I were working at cross purposes, but you did an excellent job of navigating the situation."

"What can I say?" He smirked. "This isn't the first time I've been a double agent."

"No, but it's probably been the most pleasurable one."

"Agreed."

She took his hand. "That being said, if you don't want me to be too upset about the whole thing and you want me to still get your food from The Three Broomsticks, you can do one thing for me."

"What?" He asked.

"Okay, we're about ready," Kevin announced.

"Invite me to Monopoly Mondays," she continued.

"I'm surprised your parents haven't invited you already," Severus answered.

"Oh no they'd never invite me," she chuckled.

"I'm sure that isn't true."

"But it is! I'm a shark in Monopoly. They haven't beaten me in it yet."

"They haven't?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Nope," she smirked. "Mum and Dad stopped playing with me when they realized they couldn't compete with the strategy of take the railroads, the orange properties, maybe Illinois Avenue, and make sure nobody else gets a Monopoly. Works every time."

"I will keep that in mind."

There was a hissing in the air.

"So am I invited?" She asked.

"I'll lay out some extra Vegemite just for you."

"Good."

The sky lit up with white and red fireworks.

"Severus?"

He hummed.

Her eyes glistened as brightly as the fireworks did. "Did you know it's good luck to kiss someone under the fireworks?"

"Is it now?"

"Yes."

A green firework exploded in the sky.

Hermione and Severus paid no attention to it though. Instead, their lips met, oblivious to Muriel's smile of approval.

It wasn't necessary for Severus to bring a gift, not when he cared for her daughter as much as he did. At the end of the day, her daughter's happiness was the best birthday present Muriel could have ever received.

Only the epilogue left to go!