A/N: Ah, Charades. If Star Trek: SNW was a rom-com this would be the penultimate episode! I could tweak this chapter forever - but here you go - enjoy!

Christine Chapel's Personal Log

I went to interstellar space today.

I made first contact with a race that hasn't interacted with humans in centuries – and I convinced them to give me a medical cure that will take me a lifetime to figure out how to replicate – if then.

See, I'm choosing to focus on the positive rather than dwell on the past two most frustrating months of my life.

Throwing myself into applying for fellowships and burying myself in work has been a lesson in futility as nothing dulls the pain of how much it hurts that Spock has been giving me the silent treatment for weeks now and won't even make eye contact with me when we're in the same room. He shared a turbolift with Dr. M'Benga and me a few days ago, and barely acknowledged our presence with a nod, then kept his eyes straight ahead until he got off the 'lift. If I had low self-esteem, I'd be biting my nails and thinking of ways to get his attention –

I tried to explain my feelings for Spock to Yellow. I care deeply for him – and the Kerkhovians messed him up when they remade him as fully human. Even though he was cracking jokes to make me smile and he hugged me because he felt like I needed it – all of that was nice –it wasn't HIM. It was like being trapped in a mirror universe, with another Spock that looked like him and talked like him and walked like him but wasn't him.

So, I went to interstellar space to get my friend back – even if he never talks to or spends time with me again.

"Christine!"

Her head shot up from the electron microscope as Erika stormed into the science lab. "What the hell-? You scared me half to death, E."

Erica closed the gap between them and leaned a hip against the counter. "What are you doing?"

Christine frowned. "Research?"

"Why aren't you with Spock?"

"I beg your pardon!"

"Listen here, missy. You risked your life – as well as mine and Nyota's – by going to interstellar space and getting that cure – and you're still hiding out in here, working. Don't you think it's past time that you talked to him?"

"About what?"

Erica snorted. "'About what?'" she echoed the words back sarcastically. "About your feelings – and how he feels about you."

Christine flushed, her face flaming as she picked up a padd and entered some numbers into it. "I don't think that's any of your business – and besides, you know as well as I do his engagement dinner ended a few hours ago. I'm sure that he and T'Pring are enjoying some alone time -"

"T'Pring beamed back down to Vulcan at 0100 hours."

The padd slipped through Christine's fingers and clattered on the countertop. "What? How do you know?"

Erica didn't even try to keep the smirk off her face. "Nothing is a secret for long on this starship. I talked to Ensign Ryan when she was coming off duty at 0200. She told me that everyone had returned to Vulcan, including T'Pring and Spock's mother."

"So – he's alone?"

"Yup, and I bet he wouldn't mind some company-"

Christine's left eyebrow rose on her forehead. "Seriously, do you not know the first thing about Vulcans? They value their alone time – and Spock knows how to find me if he wants to talk to me."

"Who said anything about talking? I'm telling you to go to his quarters and make your move! Strike while the iron's hot! Tell him you think he's one fine-"

"Erica!" Christine exclaimed, shaking her head as she smothered a yawn with the back of her hand. "Are you seriously suggesting – no, never mind. I know what you're suggesting. And I'm not going to do it. The only place I'm going to is my own quarters. I'm exhausted."

Erica sighed. "You are completely hopeless."

Spock couldn't stop pacing.

It was a very un-Vulcan like trait, but it was a habit he started during the short time he was fully human, and one he found oddly soothing. He discovered that the repetitive movement kept pace with his racing thoughts, the ones at war with his logic and reason. He hadn't enjoyed much about being fully human, as he felt out of control and oddly hormonal most of the time.

The only highlights from the experience had been the two human women in his life – his mother and Christine.

Sharing a mind meld with his mother so soon after being fully human had been quite illuminating – he was still reeling from all the emotional insights. The sacrifices Amanda had made, everything she gave up and the pain she endured . . . she truly was the most remarkable human being he had ever known.

And then there was Christine.

Every time he saw her, he felt alive. There was no other way to describe it. Christine had a light, an energy about her that brightened everything and everyone around her – it wasn't logical. He knew it wasn't. But the freedom he had when he was fully human, and she walked into the room, and he was able to smile just at the sight of her . . . he hadn't wanted that feeling to end.

She had gone to interstellar space for him – so that he wouldn't spend the rest of his days fully human. She knew that wasn't what he wanted, even though as a human man, a relationship between them might have been possible. It definitely would have made certain elements of their friendship far easier.

"It's not easy being a human who loves a Vulcan."

His mother's words echoed in his mind and his pacing slowed as he considered their meaning. He knew that she was referring to herself and her feelings for Sarek, but was there a message for him as well? Was she warning him that being part-human, it would be difficult to love a full-blooded Vulcan? He had no idea where his relationship stood with T'Pring and her parents after that disastrous dinner. And when T'Pring shared the news of their decision to spend time apart, he had a feeling that T'Pril would be pleased and waste no time seeking new suitors for her daughter.

Why didn't I try harder to tell T'Pring what had happened to me? She spoke the truth when she said that I had involved my shipmates in my deception but kept the truth from her. The entire dinner I could feel her anxiety about her mother but all I could think about was-

"Christine." Spock stopped his pacing as soon as her name passed his lips.

Perhaps his mother had been referring to Christine. Even though the two women had never met, he had mentioned her name frequently in his communications home, and his mother was no fool. She knew him better than he knew himself and she also knew how to keep her own council. For a non-Vulcan, Amanda was quite astute. Had she been able to pick up on his feelings for Christine – feelings that he had never verbally expressed to another person?

I need to talk to her. Our conversation earlier was cut short, and it needs to be finished. I have to tell her-

Having made the decision, Spock strode purposefully to the door, and it opened, revealing a surprised Christine on the other side.

He fell back a pace. "I was just on my way to see you."

"I'm here," she whispered, giving a slight shrug. "What were you coming to see me about?"

He paced back inside, knowing it wasn't exactly an invitation to enter, but he felt an overwhelming sense of relief as he heard the doors swoosh shut and he turned back to see that she had followed, and was now waiting for his response, an expectant look upon her face.

"To tell you that T'Pring and I have decided to take time apart."

"What's the occasion, Captain, for this dinner in the middle of the week?"

Pike smiled at his bridge crew as he set the last platter down on the bar. "Well, we had a lot left over from this fancy dinner-"

Erica leaned forward on her barstool. "You mean from Spock's failed engagement shindig?"

Nyota elbowed her in the ribs. "Hey, I heard he passed every test with flying colors!"

Erica snickered. "Until he tanked it by-"

Dr. M'Benga coughed. "Don't you think we should give Mr. Spock a break? He's had quite the ordeal the past couple of days-"

"Or at least wait until he's here to defend himself," Una chimed in from the end of the bar.

"He's not coming."

All heads swiveled to Christine who had dropped this bombshell.

"What?"

"Why?"

"How do you know?"

Christine shrugged and nonchalantly picked up a bite, chewing slowly and taking the time to swallow before answering. "I saw him on the way here – he told me he had work to catch up on – and said he wasn't hungry for any more Vulcan delicacies."

Captain Pike shook his head. "I must have really gotten the recipes wrong-"

Everyone protested and insisted on how good the food was, as Pike laughed.

"Are any of you Vulcans?"

"No, which only means you can believe our unbiased opinion!" Erica joked as she shoveled more food in her mouth.

After everyone had eaten their fill, Pike joined M'Benga and Christine in the lounge area.

"How is Spock?"

The two medical personnel exchanged looks.

"Physically, he's fine. His readings are back to normal, for him – you'd never know he was ever fully human," M'Benga replied.

"And emotionally?"

"That's more difficult to measure now that he's part-Vulcan again – Christine has been doing follow-ups with him. Do you have anything to add, Nurse Chapel?"

Pike turned his piercing gaze on her and she tried not to blush, glad that neither man was a telepath and therefore could read her thoughts. She didn't want them to know how thorough her physical exam of Spock had been last night – or this morning.

"The cure that Yellow- the Kerkhovians – gave me worked. Spock's DNA is as it was before – don't ask me how it worked or what was in it because I don't know – at least not yet!"

Pike smiled. "Planning on writing a paper?"

"Yes, sir, at least one!"

Pike nodded. "But emotionally? I only ask because, well, his engagement is sort of on hold and I'm wondering if he is fit for duty in light of everything that's happened to him the past few days."

Again, there was a brief silent conference between M'Benga and Christine before both of them smiled.

"Yes, captain, Spock is fit for duty."

Spock had left the door unlocked.

Having finished his work half an hour ago, he was now sitting in a lotus pose, legs crossed, hands on knees with palms up, breathing deep and even as he cleared his mind.

Which wasn't an easy thing to do when his quarters and even his very skin still smelled like her.

Vulcans have a much stronger sense of smell than humans – which is why they often took nasal suppressants if they were going to be in sustained contact with any humanoid species. Their natural odor could become quite overwhelming and unpleasant to Vulcans unless it was a desired contact, that of someone they wished to be close to, such as a lover-

The doors swooshed open, and her scent grew stronger as she stepped into his private quarters. Spock's lips twitched and he heard Christine's slight gasp of surprise.

"Is that a smile?" she chuckled. "I told Captain Pike that you were fit for duty, but I don't know – a smiling Vulcan – perhaps you are still feeling a few aftereffects of your time as a human."

Opening his eyes, he wrapped his fingers around her wrist, pulling her down to sit next to him. "How was the captain's dinner?"

"The food was delicious. You were missed." His fingers were rubbing the skin on the inside of her wrist, sending tingles of desire up her arm. "But I think everyone understood your need to be alone after everything you've been through the past few days."

"My need for solitude has been met."

Her light eyes darted up to lock with his dark ones. "Is that your way of saying my company is not unwelcome?"

Unlike their kiss last night when she arrived at his quarters, Spock initiated this one, pressing his eager lips to hers and she surrendered to his passion.

Spock opened his eyes to see Christine staring at him, her chin resting on his chest.

He would have been unnerved by her close proximity had he not sensed her presence before waking – in fact, it was her nearness that had awoken him. He was not used to sharing his private sleeping area with another – the few times that he and T'Pring had been intimate she had not lingered in his bed. But he found that waking yesterday morning with Christine in his arms had felt – it was not something he could put into words just yet.

"Good morning." She smiled when his eyes landed on hers, letting one hand trail up his chest to caress his left ear. He sighed into her touch, and her smile deepened. "I didn't know Vulcan ears were erogenous zones."

He shivered under her touch, taking a moment to breathe in and out to regain his center as her caress continued. "Our ears are a bit more sensitive than the average human male's but I have never noticed a particular difference-" he shivered again as she began to caress the right one as well. "Until you."

Her fingers stopped their movement as her eyes widened. "You mean, T'Pring never – I mean – surely you've done all this before-"

He focused on the wild fluttering of her pulse that he could see just under the thin skin of her slender neck. "I have – but it all seems new with you. You make me feel-" he swallowed and searched for the words that still wouldn't come.

Christine lowered her hands to his chest, and rested her chin on them, her clear blue eyes boring a hole through him. "Talk to me, Spock. How do I make you feel?"

"Alive."

She chuckled. "Were you dead?"

He nodded slowly. "Part of me was – though I do not think I was fully aware of the fact until the shuttle accident made me human. I always strived to be the perfect son for my father, which meant suppressing my human side. It is only since I started my service aboard the Enterprise and found my place here among shipmates that accepted me, that I discovered I could be myself."

Christine smiled. "You mean, you found a family and made friends."

"And I met you."

She shook her head in silent protest. "I didn't do anything different from anyone else-"

"You underestimate yourself, Christine. From the beginning, I saw how you treated the crew and the aliens we encountered. There is a light about you, even though I know you have endured your own dark times as well. You took the time to mentor me, to encourage me to embrace my human side – to see that emotions weren't a weakness, but an asset."

"You've been feeling a lot of those human emotions recently," Christine soothed him, dropping a quick kiss on his lips, before settling back on his chest. "But you still haven't really answered my question – how do you feel about me?"

Spock looked at her for a long moment before he lifted his eyes and stared over her shoulder. "You asked me why I diverted the shuttle's shields to protect you, leaving myself open and vulnerable to attack-"

He felt her stiffen against him, and her voice was rough with emotion as she replied, "Yes, it was a stupid thing to do! You could have died – no, you did die and the Kerkhovians saved you, though they put you back together wrong! Spock, why did you do it?"

He took a deep shuddering breath before he locked eyes with her, and she gasped at the depth of emotion she saw in them.

"Two months ago, you were blown out of an airlock and nearly froze to death in space before Enterprise beamed you aboard. When I entered the transporter room and saw you lying there, covered in ice – I thought you were dead." He pulled her up gently until she was nestled against his body, her head now tucked under his chin. "I thought I lost you that day – and that fear has been part of me ever since," he whispered into her hair. "When we were attacked on that shuttle, it was my fear come to life once again."

"Spock," she breathed his name out on a sigh, her hands coming up to caress his ears once more, this time in comfort.

"I could not let you die – not when I could save you."

She pulled back to look him in the eye. "It was still a bloody stupid thing to do – but a totally human response and very romantic."

"Romantic?"

"Hmm, very." She licked her lips once before closing the distance and kissing him fiercely.

It wasn't long before a chirping sound interrupted them, forcing them apart as reality crept into their private world. Christine pulled the sheet up to cover her body as Spock left their bed to answer the summons. She heard him talking to the captain, but both of their voices were too low for her to make out the words. When he returned, she could tell by his facial expression that he was back in Starfleet command mode.

"Duty calls," she sighed and slipped out from under the covers to begin the search for her clothes.

She had her white jumpsuit halfway on before she felt Spock wrap his arms around her waist from behind.

"I am sorry our morning is being cut short. I wanted to make you breakfast."

Her dark eyebrows shot towards her white hairline. "You wanted to cook me something?"

"I have been making progress under Captain Pike's tutelage-"

"Hmm, sounds fascinating. Next time, lover boy."

He grabbed her hand and kissed her fingers. "Christine-"

She frowned at his tone and the look on his face. "You sound so serious - what is it?"

"I am still wondering – what does this mean?" He waved a hand between the two of them.

She froze for a moment before she tried and failed to stifle the laughter.

His frown deepened. "I do not think I said anything amusing-"

"No, I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh, it's just – usually I'm the one that's feeling insecure at the beginning of a new relationship and seeking reassurance from the guy. It struck me as amusing that the shoe is on the other foot-"

"I am not insecure-"

"Of course not," she purred, wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing herself against him. "But if you are in the near future, you don't have any reason to be – I want this as much as you do."

"You are sure?"

"I am." She kissed him quickly, stepping back to finish getting dressed. "Now, I know you like to be in control and plan out every single detail but that's not how it works in relationships. Especially in one such as ours that needs to be kept on the down low due to the fact that you are technically still engaged, and the fact that we work together on the same starship – do you see the logic in what I'm saying?"

Spock nodded.

"Good. So, as for what this means – we admitted that we have deep feelings for each other, and we are exploring those feelings. Let's try taking it one day at a time and seeing what happens. How does that sound?"

"A very logical approach to a complicated situation," he mused aloud. "Perhaps I should exit first since these are my quarters."

"A wise precaution." She nodded. "You should definitely go first – I'll wait a few minutes and then head for my own quarters to freshen up."

Spock looked like he wanted to add something, but he gave her a tight nod before walking to the door, then turned abruptly and strode back, cupped her face in his hands and kissed her senselessly.

She blinked at him for a moment when they pulled apart, before managing to whisper. "Have a good day."

The same twitching of his lips occurred before he got his facial muscles under control. "Dinner tonight? I will cook."

She grinned and winked. "It's a date."

A/N: I'll never forget my reaction to their kiss the first time I saw this episode: "I can't believe the writers let them do that!" - but I knew their happiness would be short-lived. Some people say that Spock and Chapel are a doomed ship, but I refuse to believe that. I think SNW is just enough different that it might a parallel universe - one in which our lovers might be together, one day.