Chapter 4

Fun's out of Stock

Viridian City was…

Well...I don't know if the Unovans ever invented a fancy word for shithole, but it would probably be a great word to describe Viridian City.

The town smelled like peasantry and common folk and although the weather was great, I couldn't help but to feel aghast at the mediocrity of this place.

I mean, their main Gym was a Ground type specialist. Is there anything more boring than the ground? They could have at least named it something more exciting, like earth type…though that would probably conflict with the Rock type.

Ground type just sounds so basic. I would rather be a generalist than proudly proclaim myself as master of the floorboards.

Charmander trailed behind me as we made our way through town. I quietly wondered if Blue had passed this place yet, or if he chose the Water Gym first, or if he did the Pewter City gym first. His Squirtle would give him an edge over Brock.

Blue was always edgy. I recalled when he went during his emo phase. It was fun when he was listening to metal music in school, but I thought it was a bit inappropriate to play it during the teacher's funeral. At least I had earplugs in.

"Young man," An old looking man called out to me. He was sitting next to a large pond.

I turned to look at him and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you one of the new ones?" He asked.

New ones? New whats?

"New trainers!" The old man got up from his bench. "Every year there's a new batch of fresh trainers coming from Pallet town, dreaming of taking on the League!"

I shook my head. No uh! Heck no, I recognize a tutorial when I see one and I refuse to waste my time on some old man babble. Reminds me of a classmate I once had, Larry or something. He could talk all day to me, and said I was a great listener. He probably only thought that because I was mute and he refused to learn sign language. But his dad was rich and I was pretty good at tuning him out so I managed. But still, this old man didn't strike me as the rich kind of person.

"Char char!" Charmander said. Wise words, if I ever heard them. I nodded in agreement and quietly told the man that his advice was not welcome here. I'm an expert, I already had 2 Pokémon.

"Oh I see," the old man sighed. "The young have no time for old people."

True. Young people too. People in general. All I need are Pokémon. I once did a project for school in which I had to investigate loneliness amongst the elderly. I really got far with it, but I didn't feel like talking to the elderly in Pallet Town so I just decided to…

What did I decide?

Eh, probably wasn't important.

I turned away from the old man and headed towards the building with the red shining roof. It was really big and stood out above the rest of the downtrodden and boring buildings of Viridian. It was of course a Pokémon Center!

Without further time wasting, I headed for the Pokémon Center, which might as well be the only sign of civilization in Viridian City.

As I entered the Pokémon Center I basked in the smell of liberty and modernity. They even had electricity!

It was one of the big ones that combined the features of the Poké Mart and the free healthcare provided by the Center..

I'm sure that multiple philosophers of old would be very confused by this expression of socialism and capitalism in one place, but I found the reason for this mismatch of ideologies pretty clear.

Violence, or in specific Pokémon violence, is awesome and the League as a governing body does anything in her power to perpetuate that cycle.

Truly our League is awesome. Sure they spend all of their budget on making a single Pokémon Center instead of trying to improve the infrastructure and livability of Viridian City, but I don't live here anyway, so it was a reasonable decision.

Though I do wonder how this economy is still going. I fight Pokémon and get money, and invest that money into fighting more Pokémon. The League invests money into getting me to fight more Pokémon.

Where does the money come from? Maybe I am stuck in a dead end job already. Just run around, fight wild Pokémon and get paid. Maybe that's why crime is rampant in Kanto?

Yeah, now I think about it. This economy sucks. I wish we went back to the war economy.

Looking at the poor state of Johto, they too probably wish that.

I went to one of the stalls and wondered what to take with me. More Pokéballs was probably a good idea. I also took some healing potions and poison curing medicine with me. Between Pewter City and Viridian there were apparently a shit load of poison type Pokémon.

Welp, have to buy something just in case I get poisoned. Reminds me of Larry. After his foot got stabbed by a Weedle they had to amputate his entire leg. Can't believe they even amputated the wrong leg.

"Char char!" Charmander pointed at a shelf holding all kinds of magazines. Some of them were about Pokémon, others were about Pokémon and wow, there was even a magazine about Pokémon.

I chose one that had Sabrina on the cover. At least that one seemed mildly interesting and it made my Charmander happy.

I paid money to the cashier and left the place.

Back in the streets of Viridian I decided to head to the Gym. Probably for the best to do it now. My bird thing would have a type advantage and Charmander had some stuff he could play with.

We'd do great against Giovanni.

The Gym building was…well a big building for Pokémon battles. I don't imagine there was a lot you could do with a Ground type Gym stylistically. I heard about one Gym leader in Sinnoh who held her Gym battles at 1 kilometers altitude, though I heard she didn't last long.

As we approached the Ground type Gym I could feel my confidence sharpen. I realize other people might be shaking in their boots but honestly, I was feeling really calm about this entire situation.

I approached the door.

It didn't open.

I spread my arms. SESAME OPEN PLEASE!

It refused to open.

There was a letter attached to the door.

Official Sinnoh Pokémon League Gym Leader Absence

[date here]

The Gym leader of Viridian City is currently not present, and/or able to conduct Official Gym Challenges due to internal affairs. If this Gym remains inactive for over 30 the League will take steps to prepare a transfer of position.

My job sucks.

A/N I think I was a little bit late with this update.