Notes:
I know I have a plethora of other fics, but this brain won't stop whirring djfhsjkfhsdkjf
this is basically a brain child born from ttpd being released so ty taylor alison swift for getting me out of what was going to be another writer's block
parts headed with "Then" will be told through past tense. parts headed with "Now" will be told through present tense. :)
and omg wowwww a third person modern au fic from ME?! unheard of!
(this chapter is unedited and not proofread 04/30/24)
prologue
Then
Sasuke had begun welcoming silence.
For so long, it was the quiet that he dreaded most. The quiet was when he needed to be his most vigilant. The quiet brought out the memories of the day the world had crumbled beneath him, nothing but the irregular beating of his heart pounding in his ears and the wet pool of crimson on his knees flashing like quick images in his mind. It was a constant reminder of what was taken from him and his brother.
These days, the quiet was calm. The quiet was reprieve. The quiet was an escape.
All because of her.
Sakura came into his life unexpectedly. She was the intelligent girl in his philosophy class that always found attention on her. One, because of her pastel pink hair. Two, because of her reputation among the medical undergrads as the genius. Naturally, the latter had people clambering for her help in the impossible to please Professor Suzume's class.
At one point, he, too, needed her help.
Three years later, she's no longer just another classmate.
Lying naked beside him, Sakura's arms wrapped around his waist, her head nestled beneath his chin. His thumb drew circles on the skin of her lower back, gently pulling her closer.
He took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of her shampoo. Cherry blossoms, incredibly fitting.
He never imagined he'd find himself this content, this comfortable with someone, but she'd managed to force her way through his heavily guarded walls, bare fists rendering the brick to crumble.
It wasn't immediate. Her relentless pursuit in getting to know him eventually developed into a friendship. It seemed every single time he was determined to let the swarm of pitch-black envelope him once more, she was a guiding light to freedom.
He could have stayed shrouded in the darkness, but he chose to walk into the sunlight. He chose her.
While he's happy now, he knew it couldn't last. He could have stayed away. In the long haul, he knew it would have been the safer option for both of them.
But the taste of freedom was too sweet, the skin of warmth too tempting, and the smell of spring was what he'd been too afraid to crave.
He had never felt this way before, and for once in his life, he allowed himself to be selfish.
Konoha University was neutral ground. It was safe here. She was safe here.
After he leaves this place, he'd have to leave her too.
He didn't know at first just how painful the thought of it would be.
She hummed contentedly in his arms, a smile pressed onto his skin. "You're always so cold. It's nice."
"You're a furnace."
He felt her smile widen.
"You love it, though." Her words come out in a tired whisper, slumber slowly seizing her. Right before it does, the words that escape her lips makes his world stop.
"I love you."
The hand caressing the small of her back pauses, stunned beyond speechless at the casualness of the confession.
He laid there tormented by his thoughts. How was it possible to mourn an end that hasn't yet arrived? He had a year left. One more year to relish in her love.
At that moment, he didn't know that his brother would be found dead in just a few days.
At that moment, he didn't know that his grandfather will take him back to what he always knew to prepare him for a role that was never supposed to be his.
At that moment, he couldn't bring himself to tell her he loved her, too.
The end was going to be unbearable for both.
If only she knew why it had to be done.
End Notes:
angst? in this household? because I listened to ttpd? *overexaggerated gasp* no!
welcome to my second chance mafia(-ish) sasusaku au!
now, sing it with me folks
*deep inhale*
AND I HOPE IT'S SHITTY
IN THE BLACK DOG
WHEN SOMEONE PLAYS THE STARTING LINE AND YOU JUMP UP
BUT SHE'S TOO YOUNG TO KNOW THIS SONG
THAT WAS INTERTWINED WITH THE MAGIC FABRIC OF OUR DREAMING
OLD HABITS DIE
SCREEEEEEEAAAAAAAMMMMMMIIIIIINNNNGGGGG!