Summary: When I first saw this Sirius Black, I knew he had to be mine. Only mine.

Rated: T

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Competition/Challenge Block
Written For: Monthly Challenges for All (Year 6); Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry 2.0 (Term 2); Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition (Season 11)

Quidditch: R2 - Beater 2 (Black: Write about protection. [Word] Disbelief; [Emotion] Happiness)

Hogwarts: A5 - Paleontology Task #2 (Write about a predator.)

MC4A: Chimera (Hurt/Comfort; Trickster; Onyx); Hunt (Captivity); SpB (4A: Offering); TrB (2B: Just A Flesh Wound); ShB (2E: Sick Fic)

Beta: WiseGryffindor; AlcestePeace

Word Count: 1,122

Warning Tag: Heavy Descriptions of Mental Torture, Suffering, Death, and Imprisonment.

Author's Note: This is in the point of view of a dementor. It is quite different, I know. I hope you enjoy it regardless.

The names are all different languages for "Grim Reaper/Death" and "Boogeyman", respectively.

Suffering Bliss

.oOo.

If I had a heart, I could love you
If I had a voice, I would sing
After the night, when I wake up
I'll see what tomorrow brings

— If I Had A Heart by Fever Ray

.oOo.

It was not a place most would consider a home, but it was mine. Something about the cool, damp air and dark stone that made up the Azkaban stronghold was quite appealing to me and my kind. The pitch blackness of the long, narrow hallways made it easy to lurk in with our own black, billowy frames. The common folk called us a creature among their world known as dementors, but my kind simply called me Puki.

The agreement to live in this place was not so difficult to come to between us and the common folk. They found our particular diet fascinating yet feared it. We were but a necessity to keep the ones they imprisoned compliant. For us, it was quite delightful since we thrived on misery and despair, these commoners reeked with it at all times, and within the darkness, we all fed on the scraps of what these people found happiness and joy from.

Murder, theft, pillaging, and bloodshed. It was scarcely anything different, perhaps one would linger on a loved one or pet, but seldom swayed from this recipe we feasted from.

We only needed to move by the thick iron bars to get a taste while they wallowed and wailed in anguish in their punishment of being in our presence. Some would plead for us to stop or to finish them swiftly, yet we were told we were not allowed to claim their true essence unless specific requirements were met. It was acceptable considering we were all well sated, but the thirst lingered deep regardless for their lives.

Medelwr was the one who knew the common tongue and negotiated our terms to live in this space, so we all owe it to them for our new sanctuary. It became our dwelling among the violators of the world for a long time. I had seen countless faces come and go, watching and reveling in their decay of happiness, relishing in their diminishing life as they wallowed in their suffering, regrets, and grief before being quietly disposed of to make room for fresh stock. Never did I care about them, why would the predator pity their prey?

That was my mindset until one particular commoner had their fate placed in our hands. This offering called himself Sirius Black, and I was the one to escort him to his cell. His mind was different from the other madness that rampaged through the thoughts and feelings of everyone else around me. It fascinated yet confused me. His feelings of disbelief being here and anger at what happened tasted different, yet it made him all the more enticing. I soon found myself very attached to this individual, so I placed him in a secluded place away from the other vermin so he could have a semblance of peace.

I chased away the others to keep him to myself. I would not even allow our leader Medelwr to have a taste of the newcomer, as custom. He was mine, and I made sure all of them knew it.

Sirius suffered only in my presence, as he should. There was no way for me to stop that part of me from affecting his mind, but it was better to have just me there and not several of us feasting on his unique anguish. In a way, it was a form of pity, protection, a sanctuary among misery. His sadness was from loss, not murder, from regret, not purpose. Its taste was sweet rather than vile like the rest, and I loved it.

It was like this for some time, just he and I. I listened to him weep, watched him crying through my hollow onyx eyes, heard his pleas and apologies fall upon my ears. It was so different from the others. It made me wonder why he was even there in the first place because of it. He was not like the others that dwelled in my home.

Soon his feelings shifted from sadness to rage. An indescribable anger and determination for vengeance, yet another thing I had not tasted from the rest like this before. And for that, I grew to love this man even more. The never ending change of his emotions and mindset was alluring, but it also made it far more difficult to keep the others away from such a temptation.

Moartea started to become a pest. They and their mate Bòcan would lurk among the farthest parts of the halls where Sirius dwelled. I could feel their presence, hungry and eager to claim my prize, slinking ever closer. It had been long enough that the rest moved on to other fresh minds, leaving me and mine alone. So why were they coming for him now?

Sirius was mine.

I did not hesitate in attacking them, slashing and scratching at their black robes, hissing and screeching in warning, drawing them back. They knew better, Medelwr would hear about this treacherous behavior. During this altercation, a thin, black fluffy creature trotted around them. It was peculiar, strange. I had never seen such a thing before. It was like what the common folk called the small fat floor crawlers, but as I pondered what name they gave I could sense that my unique source of happiness had dwindled greatly.

I gave a final menacing snarl toward Moartea and Bòcan, who had been distracted by the large creature as well, before I soared through the darkness back to Sirius' cell. I could not feel his presence any longer. The space was void of a presence, his presence. That creature… that was him! I remembered seeing that thing before in his memories. Its color matched his hair. That creature…

I lingered there far longer than I should have, floating in disbelief among the darkness. Puzzling through as to why he would leave me in such a trickster's way. Why didn't he trust me to protect him from the others like I had for many years already? His escape will cause chaos here soon once it is reported—if it was reported.

Maybe he needed to leave this hellscape I call home. I knew his thoughts and memories; I knew everything about him, and he held a purpose, a responsibility beyond the others who were put in here. He was still far different from the rest despite being fed off him for so long.

Yes, this one was different. This commoner deserved to be free, to find new happiness, even if it meant I would lose mine.