Author's note : Greetings, people ! I know I promised some of you that I would update in three or four days but I was just procrastinating being my lazy self. Sorry guys. But here is the chapter. It's a very important chapter. I have given you a hint what MIGHT happen at the end of the story in this chapter. I hope you will enjoy it. Please read and leave some reviews. Your encouraging ( and sometimes criticizing ) words really make my day.

OKAY. ON WITH THE STORY.

Chapter 20

The King's Birthday

When Merlin lived in Ealdor, he had always been an early riser. He and Will always sneaked out of bed early to meet near the forest. Then they would go to the top of the small hill overlooking their village. It was a perfect spot for watching the sunrise. He always cherished those moments with his best friend. The begining of the day always used to fill him with happiness and optimism.

But things began to change when he came to Camelot. The heavy burden of a so called destiny was forced on his shoulder. Everyday he had to fight tooth and nail to protect Camelot and her prat prince; not to mention the unimaginable amount of chores he had to do daily. So, every night he went to bed with a tired body. Naturally, he began to rise a little late. At first, he missed the beauty of sunrise. But soon he got himself more tangled in the webs of so called destiny and soon his memories of Ealdor; memories of watching sun rise with Will began to fade slowly.

After arriving in Elmet, he became free but he realized that life was not easy here either. He had to perform royal duty, teach at the academy and not to mention his extra duties as the last dragonlord and the Arch-mage. He enjoyed his new works and duties as his friends and family always helped him in any way they could.

Still, each and every day was hectic for him. He rose early than he did in Camelot but not before sunrise. So, he didn't get the chance to see sunrise even in Elmet.

But today was different. Today he managed to get up early. In fact, last night he slept early skipping the evening council. Freya and his mother took over in his place. He did it because today was a special day for him and he was determined to start the day seeing the sunrise while remembering the old days when he was naive, optimistic and innocent.

It pained him to think that he was no longer that naive, cheerful farm boy. He changed. Destiny changed him and it was not for the better. Still, he was trying. He was trying to turn back into his past self. But by far, he was failing. He was becoming more cold-hearted as each day passed. And he was scared of what he might become in the end.

He hoped and prayed that maybe he would be given another chance.

And today was the best day to do it. Today was the best day to hope for something good because this day of the year had always brought him joy, optimism and hope in his life. Today was winter solstice. Today was the shortest day on northern hemisphere. Today was Merlin's twenty sixth birthday.

He was standing at the top of the white gold tower looking towards the eastern sky waiting for the red ball of light to come out.

Suddenly a soft pair of hands encircled his waist from behind. Merlin was startled at first but calmed down after realizing who it was. The owner of the hands brought her mouth closer to Merlin's ears and said, " Happy birthday, dear. "

" Thanks, love. " Merlin said with a small smile.

They stood there for some times, enjoying each other's presence in silence.

Then Freya spoke to Merlin.

" I have to speak with you about something. " Her tone was serious and Merlin couldn't fathom what she wanted to talk about.

" Yes, of course. What do you want to talk about ? " Merlin said a bit hesitantly.

" It's about you, actually. " Merlin frowned.

" Me ? What about me ? "

" I am worried about you, Merlin. You are changing. You are becoming distant. "

So, Freya had sensed it too. Merlin was not surprised, actually. After all, she was his wife. But he didn't want to burden her. He didn't want her to worry. So, he just played dumb and confused while hoping that Freya would buy it.

" What do you mean by ' you are changing ' ? I am still the same person you knew all those years ago. " Merlin said with a smile. But inside, he was very tensed. He was not going to share his guilt and burden with Freya. He was the sinner and he was going to carry his burden alone.

His train of thought was disrupted when Freya firmly grabbed his hand. Merlin almost jumped but schooled his feature. He looked at Freya and was surprised. Freya's eyes were not kind and gentle like they were usually. Rather they were filled with fire and determination. She seemed angry and hurt.

" Don't you dare lie to me, Merlin Ambrosius. You are not the Merlin I knew. The Merlin I knew was kind and compassionate; NOT RUTHLES AND COLD. You killed all those horsemen in Amata without even batting an eyelash. "

Merlin's jaw dropped hearing Freya's harsh tone. Whatever he was expecting, he was not expecting this from his wife. Then the moment of surprise passed and anger began to fill his heart.

How dare she sympathize with those Amatans! They tortured Aithusa for crying out loud. They were the bane of magic. How could she say those things to him ? He couldn't take it anymore.

He shouted back. " How could you say those things, Freya ? They were evil. They tortured Aithusa. They were soldiers of Sauron, whose father was more ruthless than Uther Pendragon himself. And he is no better. How could you sympathize with them ? "

" I am not sympathizing. I am questioning your harsh behaviour. Those men had families too. They needed them too. Maybe they had sons and daughters. Wives and parents. Maybe they were all depending on the men you killed. "

" What did you expect me to do ? Just let them go ? We needed to send a clear message to Sauron. "

" And the best way was to kill his men ? Really, Merlin ? Listen to yourself. This is not like you. The Merlin I knew would've never considered killing as a part of solution. He would've always found another way. You can't counter hatred with hatred. If you do that the cycle of hatred will never break. "

" What should I have done then ? " Merlin asked but this time his voice was lower than the last time.

" You could've made an earthquake. That would've scared them. Or you could've cut off their sword arms. That way they would've no longer posed as a threat. Sauron would've got a clear message. And those soldiers could've still found some other works to provide for their family.

But your actions just hardened the Amatans' heart towards magic even more. "

By the time, Freya was finished Merlin's eyes were welling up in tears.

" Why didn't you suggest me this when we were facing them? "

" You are intelligent, Merlin. I thought you would've found a way without any casualty. I didn't imagine you would go berserk and kill all of them. Also, what about your behaviour in the isle? You almost sowed the seed of hatred in Aren's heart. There was no need to get violent seeing those flags of Camelot. "

Merlin couldn't say anything. What Freya said was true and logical. The Amatans were enemies but the farm boy from Ealdor still wouldn't have killed them. He had become a killer. He had killed Nimueh, Agravaine, Aulfric, Sophia, even the good Morgana was his victim.

He couldn't escape from the cycle of hatred and killing. He was drowning in darkness and he couldn't stop it.

Before Merlin could say anything, he felt Freya's hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw Freya's eyes were also glassy too.

" Merlin, I know you're a good person. Don't give in to the temptation of darkness. Be the man I once knew. Be the gentle Merlin not the cold Merlin. "

" I will try, Freya. "

But Freya was not totally convinced.

" You know you can tell me anything. You can talk to me if something is bothering you. I trust you, Merlin. I am here to share your burden with you. I am your wife. Please, don't push me away. "

Freya's soothing tone broke through Merlin's defense. He broke down. He hugged Freya tightly, buried his face on Freya's shoulder and began to cry like a child.

" I am scared, Freya. I am so scared. Arthur's torture changed me and it was not for the better. I am angry. I am broken. Darkness is calling me. I fear I will become insane like Morgana. I might not be able to escape. I am losing myself. "

Merlin's each word was like a dagger to the heart of Freya. She suspected that something was bothering her husband but she didn't imagine he was so broken inside. She held her beloved tightly while Merlin continued.

" Promise me, Freya. You will never leave me. I can't live without you. You and mother are the only ones who are keeping me sane; keeping me from the darkness. You are my rock, my love, my world, my everything. Promise me. "

" I promise, Merlin. I promise. But you have to promise me something too. "

" Anything. "

" Don't hide your pain from me. How can I help you if I don't know ? And don't worry. I won't let darkness take you. I will drag you way from darkness if I have to. I will keep you grounded. "

Merlin sniffled. " Thanks, Freya. And I promise I won't keep anything from you. "

Freya gave a chuckle. " You're welcome, Merlin. Now wipe away your tears. You're the king. What would others say if they see you like this ? C'mon. Let me do it. "

Merlin also chuckled while she wiped away his tears with her dress' sleeve. Merlin felt a little lighter inside. Pouring his heart to Freya did him immense good. It soothed him in a way he never imagined. His wife was right. He shouldn't keep things from her.

He was not alone. He had friends and family to help him and he shouldn't push them away. He should let them to help him.

Suddenly Merlin felt warmer. He looked at the eastern sky and saw the sun was rising.

Merlin's heart suddenly became filled with optimism and happiness. It seemed he was right about his birthday. It did bring him hope and happiness. He held his beloved's hand, their fingers intertwined.

' It's a new day. ' Merlin thought while looking at the rising red ball of light.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The party held at Merlin's honour came and went in a blurr. The food was excellent. Merlin had never tasted so good food before. People gave him many gifts. Some gave him weapons, some gave him books, some gave him new clothes. When Freya's turn came, she took his hand and said,

" Follow me. "

" You have completed it ? " His mother asked Freya.

Freya gave an affirmative nod.

Merlin couldn't understand what's going on. So, he asked.

" You completed what ? And where do I have to follow you ? "

Freya pressed a finger on his lips.

" Shush. You will get the answer soon. Just follow me. You'll love your gift. "

Merlin knew he wouldn't be able to force any word from Freya so he obliged and followed her wondering what her gift would be.

He followed her out of the inner city. When she began to go towards the learning ground, Merlin stopped her.

" The gift is in the academy ? "

Freya nodded and said, " Well, it's a rather big one. Me and Finna built it in the academy. "

" I wonder what it could be. "

" Patience, dear. We'll have to go a little longer. "

They walked the rest of the way silently. When they reached the academy, Freya took him to the tower of Alteration. She stopped in front of a room Merlin had noticed before but didn't enter it.

Freya opened the door and ushered Merlin in.

Merlin looked around the room. The room's ceiling was way high. It was mainly empty except for a huge arch and a blue solid sphere which was floating in front of the arch.

" What is that thing, Freya ? "

" The arch of communication. You can communicate with any people you want through it, magical and non-magical people alike. But the great thing about this arch is that you can also see the one whom you are talking to. "

Freya said proudly.

" You and Finna built it all by yourself? "

" Nayem and Wayrest helped too. " Freya said smiling shyly.

Merlin was fascinated. What she did was amazing. The arc was an example of superb architecture. Thousands of runes were carved on the arch. The arch was made of steel. There were also many symbols of Druid and Catha culture carved on the arc. In a word, the structure was breath taking.

Merlin looked at Freya. " I can communicate with anyone through this? "

" Yes, anyone. All you have to do is to hold onto the floating sphere while speaking the one's name you want to speak with and the arc will activate. Then you can be able to hear, see and talk with your desired person.

But don't let go of the sphere while speaking. It will channel your magic to the arch keeping it activated. You let go of it and the connection will break. Understood? " Freya asked.

Merlin nodded.

He now understood what she said to him in that meadow six months ago.

" A peaceful meeting with Morgana ? " Merlin asked with a grin.

" You figured it out, then? Yes, this is what I meant. We were working on this project for six months. And now it's good to go. Your birthday present from me, Finna, Nayem and Wayrest. " Freya said with a soft smile.

Merlin didn't know what he should say. So, he closed the gap between him and Freya and kissed her softly on lips.

" Thanks, Freya. Thank you so much. Now I truly got a chance to redeem myself. Words can't express my gratitude. "

" You don't have to. I love you. I will do anything for you. "

Merlin's heart fluttered with joy hearing Freya's words.

" I love you too, Freya. "

They stood silently for a few moment before Freya spoke up.

" Well, you should contact with Morgana now. "

Merlin panicked. " Now ? "

" Yes. Who knows what is she doing now. The sooner she turns to light, the better. So, I suggest you talk with her now. I will leave you two alone here. No one will disturb you. Good luck. " Freya gave a short kiss on Merlin's cheek and left the room without giving Merlin any chance to talk back.

OOOOOOOOOOOOO

Merlin heaved a sigh and looked back to the arc.

" Alright. Let's get this over with. "

He grabbed the blue solid sphere with both of his hand and said,

" Morgana Pendragon. "

The blue sphere began to glow brightly and so did the arc. The runes and the symbols on the arc also began to glow. A humming sound began to come out from the arch. The air beneath the arch began to shimmer and ripple. Then suddenly, an image began to form. It became clearer with each passing moments.

And soon Merlin understood whose image it was. It was Morgana. Although all he could see was her black hair and her back garbed in a usual black dress, he could easily recognize her.

Suddenly, he felt his mouth was drying. He became nervous. Hell, he was terrified.

' What if I mess this up ? What if she doesn't forgive me ? ' One part of his mind thought.

While the other part thought, ' Get a hold to yourself. You are the bloody king of Elmet. '

He took a deep breath.

' Calm down. Just calm down. '

He took another deep breath and called out.

" Morgana. "

The figure before him stiffened. She began to look behind her. Then he saw her. His once friend. His sweet, kind and brave friend. She was beautiful as ever. But her dark hair was a mess not as elegant as it used to be during her time as the lady of Camelot. She looked a little malnourished and thin. But she still looked the same.

Her face was a picture of confusion. But soon it was replaced by anger and rage. Before Merlin could say anything, Morgana began to chant words of old religion. Her eyes became gold and she began to throw numerous fireballs, lightning bolts, giant boulders and who knew what.

Merlin knew she was throwing things at his image not at himself. So, he just crossed his arms over his chest and let Morgana's rage to cool down.

' Oh boy! I would've been roasted alive if I had approached her in person. I better let her cool down. ' He thought.

Just as he predicted, a few moments later, Morgana stopped and began to pant. But she was still sending hateful glares towards him. Merlin knew if looks could kill, he would've been dead by now.

' This is your chance, Merlin. Start talking before she throws another tantrum. ' Merlin told to himself.

The king of Elmet composed his features and greeted Morgana.

" Hello, my lady Morgana. Long time no see. "

" Shut up. " Morgana screamed.

Merlin backed away hearing Morgana's tone. Even though the lady was not present in body, she still had a dangerous aura around her and it made Merlin uneasy.

" What sorcery is this, Emrys ? Your head is floating in the air before me but I can't hurt you. What kind of tricks are you playing with me now ? " Morgana said. Her voice was furious.

Merlin thought it would be best to give Morgana direct answer. Pleasantries would make her more mad.

" Straight to business, I see. Well, Morgana the sorcery you are referring to is of the ancient religion. More powerful than the old religion. It is not my head you are seeing. It is just a living picture of my head conjured by the magic of ancient religion. This magic is free in my new home, in Elmet. Me, my friends, my family; we all practice and study this magic freely in Elmet, the only safe haven for magic in Albion. "

Merlin could see that Morgana wasn't expecting that answer. And he was proven right when she said, " Stop lying to me, Merlin. Haven't you lied enough ? There's no such thing as ancient religion. You are just trying to capture me so that you could kill me. "

Merlin felt hurt hearing Morgana's accusation. She was not trusting him. Why would she ? After all, he was the one who first betrayed her. It was he who pushed her to the darkness. But he couldn't give up. He was given a chance and he was not going to waste it.

" Please, Morgana. You are misunderstanding me. I don't want to hurt you. " Merlin said desperately.

" Huh. Don't want to hurt me ? Drop the act, Merlin. You are my doom. It is destined. Did you really think I would fall for your act ? Why are you even here actually ? " Morgana asked. She was seething in anger.

Merlin sensed this was the perfect time to apologize. So he said, " I am sorry. "

Morgana's eyes widened hearing this.

" What ? " She asked.

" I am sorry, Morgana. For all the horrible things I had done to you. I am sorry for not helping you when you were alone and afraid. I am sorry for poisoning you. I am sorry for betraying you.

I know you hate me. But please let go of your hate. You don't have to hide. Come to us. The perilous land is not perilous anymore. It has now become a thriving kingdom. A kingdom of magic where you can be free. Join us, Morgana. Don't wander in darkness. "

Merlin pleaded.

" It's a little too late for your apologies, Merlin. And I don't trust you. I am not buying your fairy tale. You're telling me that I will be free. But I can never be free as long as you're alive. You are destined to kill me. " Morgana said.

Merlin's desperation rose hearing Morgana's icy cool voice. It was so full of hatred. He was losing hope of Morgana forgiving him. But he couldn't give up this easily. So, he pushed on.

" NO, Morgana. Humans are the makers of their own destiny. Please, don't make the same mistakes I made. I, Emrys was destined to make Arthur the high king of Albion. But after Arthur's betrayal, he shattered that destiny into million pieces.

In another prophecy, Mordred was destined to kill Arthur. But he's already dead. That destiny was shattered too. So, why can't you think the prophecy between you and me can be shattered too ? "

Morgana rose her eyebrow hearing Merlin's words. She remained silent for a few moments. Then she began to laugh.

Merlin frowned hearing her laughter. It didn't sound right. It sounded so wrong, so insane. Merlin began to fear that Morgana might be losing herself completely.

She stopped a while after. But she seemed very cheery.

" Oh thank you, Merlin. I didn't know about Mordred and Arthur. But you've solved one of my greatest problems. Now I know how can I find true happiness. "

" How ? Tell me. I want you to be happy. I will do anything to make it up to you. Please, my friend. Just give me another chance. I beg you. Please forgive me. "

Morgana just chuckled hearing Merlin's words and said, " Awww! That's really sweet. But the only thing that can make me truly happy is the sight of your corpse. Can you give me that? "

Then she began to give her signature evil smirk.

Merlin's face fell hearing her words.

Morgana spoke again.

" Don't look so crestfallen. You'll have your wish. I'll soon be coming for you and tear your heart from your body. Then the prophecy will shatter and I will be free. "

" You really hate me that much ? " Merlin asked. His voice was shaking. Tears were falling from his eyes.

Morgana was going to answer his question but then she stopped. She looked away as if she was remembering something. She looked at Merlin again and spoke up. Her eyes were cold. Her voice cruel.

" You cannot begin to know how much I hate you. "

In that moment, looking at his former friend's eyes, Merlin understood that all hope was lost. Her friend Morgana was gone. She would never forgive him. He would have to live his whole life in disgrace and shame. His friend's face when she was poisoned would always haunt his nightmare.

He looked eye to eye with Morgana and said, " I am truly ashamed of my deed. I am sorry. But I know you have made up your mind. I really wanted to make you feel happy and free. I cannot give you what you wish for. Maybe one day, I will be able to make you happy. But not today. Not today. "

After saying this, he didn't give Morgana to say anything else. He let go of the blue sphere and Morgana's face vanished. The king of Elmet wiped away his tears and walked out of the room with a heavy heart.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

To Teekalin : I have borrowed your idea of Merlin's birthday in winter solstice from your story. I hope you wouldn't mind.

Now Morgana has turned into a complete nut-case, hasn't she ? What could be the possible cure for her insanity ? Any guesses, my dear readers and reviewers? ( Hint! Hint! ) Next chapter : Morgana meets with the royal family of Saxony after crossing Dover strait. I will try to update soon. Adios and happy reading. - Assassin of Syria.