Season 7
On the Jin-Saiyan home world, Mon and Eltro were on a stage in front of tens of thousands of Insane soldiers in formations of 100 men blocks. They all wore black gi, black chest armor, and black capes clashing with the white desert ground. Every block formation had a black and white imperial flag with thirteen stripes and fifty stars. In the background were military base dome structures.
Eltro gave Mon the salute which he returned. "The Titans have tasked us with quelling the insurgents, the Fremen of Arrakiss. I'm giving you command of all Imperial forces. Don't fuck it up," Mon said to him.
Eltro nodded and then held up his hands. The tens of thousands of Insane soldiers did as well with a mighty shout.
Arrakiss
Saul was forty years old and a freman of no real consequence. He often went to a cave where he prayed and contemplated the social unrest, injustice, widespread discrimination, fighting among tribes, abuse of tribal authorities, and the aliens that had dominated the planet for its valuable spice. One day, Saul was confronted by a man in glowing white.
"It is I, Gabriel, the angel of the Lord," he said. He then pointed at the cave wall and words appeared. "Read that shit," he ordered.
"I can't read," Saul said lamely.
Gabriel took Saul by the neck nearly choking him out. "Then memorize what I'm about to say. "You were created from clinging substance. The Lord is more generous. He who taught you by the pen taught men that which he knew not."
Gabriel then released Saul to the ground. "Recite it," he ordered.
"What?" Saul asked confused.
"Recite what I told you," Gabriel ordered as he choked Saul out again and then released him.
"But why?" Saul wondered.
"For I am an angel and you're fucked if you don't," Gabriel said as he choked Saul out a third time.
Saul then recited the verse correctly before Gabriel. "From now on, your name shall be Paul. I will follow you home where you will teach this verse to all in your household," Gabriel ordered.
At the Imperial base, Eltro had just gotten himself a cup of Joe. The base was heavily fortified with a large wall, a mountain to the rear, and several heavily armored fortresses, airstrips, hangars, barracks, and droid factories. In front of Eltro was a hologram map of the entire planet.
"What's happening?" he casually asked Brainiac 5.
"The Fremen are interfering with spice production. I have been losing too many drones trying to search and destroy them," Brainiac 5 reported.
"What about the south?" Eltro pointed seeing zero activity there.
"The south is uninhabited by the spice worms so there's no need for spice collection there," Brainiac 5 explained.
"Any Fremen there?" Eltro asked curiously.
"Potentially several million," Brainiac 5 said as satellite imagery showed infrared collections all over the southern hemisphere.
"I have been tasked to take control of the entire planet including the south," Eltro said seriously.
"Attacks in the south will escalate Fremen opposition. They may travel to the north just to fuck with us," Brainiac 5 warned.
"Good," Eltro smiled. "Orchestrate attacks on the southern hemisphere. Not enough to create mass casualties, just enough to piss them off."
"That contradicts the Titan priority for normal spice flow," Brainiac 5 reminded him.
"I don't give a shit what Titans want. The Insane course of action is to turn this into a world war. Are we clear?" Eltro asked.
"Understood," Brainiac 5 relented.
In the desert, Paul returned home and met his wife, Channi. Unlike Paul, Channi wasn't able to see Gabriel. "I went to the cave and saw an angel. He ordered me to tell you these verses," Paul said to her. "You were created...," he began and then forgot the rest.
Gabriel gave him the evil eye as Paul struggled to come up with the rest. "Is that it?" Channi asked.
"Well, yeah. The angel is with me...even now," Paul told her.
"How do you know this is an angel and not a demon?" Channi asked.
"No idea," Paul admitted.
"We must test your angel," Channi suggested and proceeded to give Paul a lap dance. As things became more hot and heavy, Channi began stripping her clothes off. Paul totally went with it enjoying the sensation of his wild wife. "Is he still there?" she asked.
"Yes," Paul nodded.
"Then, he is a true angel. If he were a demon, he would be a homosexual and would have left us," Channi reasoned.
"You speak the truth," Paul said reassured.
Channi then made love to Paul on the spot with Gabriel patiently watching.
Paul came before the elders of the Fremen to discuss with them his revelations and friendship with Gabriel. The elders were skeptical of his claims. "You are under the influence of a jinn spirit, a soothsayer, or a magician," one elder accused.
"Or you're full of shit," another elder accused.
"Okay, you want proof. I'm going to have a seizure in three, two, one...," Paul said and then spassed out as he went into an immediate seizure.
"Damn," the elders said impressed.
Despite this "evidence" the council was still skeptical of Paul and threw him out once he had recovered.
Paul then went to a high mountain and contemplated suicide. Gabriel then appeared next to him. "The fuck you doing?" he demanded. Paul nearly fell off, startled.
"No one believes me. I'm no prophet or messiah," Paul said, filled with self-pity.
"Look, go into this cave. There, you will drink some blue sugar drink and your eyes will turn blue. Then, the people will believe you," Gabriel ordered. Paul did as he was told and found the flask of blue liquid. "Drink it," Gabriel pressed. "It's sandworm piss."
"Fuck me," Paul said to himself and then drank it down. He immediately started gagging and convulsing. "Holy shit," Paul said painfully. His eyes were now blue.
Paul then went back to his village with blue eyes. "See my eyes. Now you must believe me," he said to his people.
"This is no miracle. You were trained to drink sandworm piss," an elder accused.
"I'm not here to lead. I'm just here to fight beside you," Paul assured them. "You know I'm right because I'm being really humble right now."
"Bullshit!" the people shouted at him.
Paul then returned to the mountain and contemplated suicide. "The fuck you doing?" Gabriel demanded pissed off.
"I can't do this," Paul said to him.
"If you don't, you and your people are destined for hellfire for disbelief. I come with promises of reward for believers. If you and your people reject me, there will be famine, killing, and future calamities. Then, at the Final Judgement, all of you are fucked. So, go back home and I never want to see you back on this mountain," Gabriel told him.
Shortly after that, a giant spice vacuum structure on tank treads was air-dropped onto the sand. It had several large prongs to test the sand for spice and dozens of smaller prongs to get at the spice to suck up. The structure was protected by helicopters and on-the-ground infantry. Fremen emerged from the sand and attacked the Brainiac 5 drones dropping them quickly. They used bladed weapons and knew where to slice through the drones from prior experience.
This was not unexpected. The helicopters fired on the Fremen dropping several of them at a time with automatic plasma fire. After a few dozen casualties, the Fremen went underneath the vacuum structure to take cover. They emerged from the other side only to face more drones. An anti-aircraft missile hit a helicopter only to be deflected harmlessly off the shields.
"They can't fire and have shields at the same time," Paul said to Channi.
Paul went out as bait. The helicopter predictably fired on him and then Channi fired her anti-aircraft missile launcher. The helicopter exploded in midair. Fremen, from a distance, fired laser weapons at the vacuum structure causing it to explode in a fireball of spice and shrapnel. Paul and Channi had distinguished themselves in this battle and many started to believe Paul might be legit.
In the evening celebrations of their victory, some challenged Paul's revelations. "If you are a prophet, bring forth water from the sand," one of them demanded.
"Yeah, no. The queer stuff that happens in nature is proof alone of the Divine," Paul said.
"Why hasn't God bestowed more treasure upon you? Why are you so poor?" one asked.
"I say to you that whoever is rich is greedy as fuck and should share," Paul shot back.
"Visit heaven and retrieve a written copy of the verses," one challenged.
"What I have already told you is so awesome and inspiring that it couldn't have come anywhere but from God," Paul told him off.
The tribal people were even more skeptical and talked mad shit about him. Finally, Paul exploded on them. "By God, who holds my life in His hand, I will bring you slaughter!"
"Paul, shut the fuck up, you're drunk on sandworm piss. Go home," one of them told him.
"I will not. I belong here as much as any of you," Paul said angrily.
The Fremen then grabbed Paul to beat his ass. "Would you kill a man for saying God is his Lord?" Stilgar asked, shaming them all.
Then they were allowed to leave and the Fremen continued their discussion of him. "He vilifies our forefathers, derides our traditional values, and abuses our gods. He's an asshole. Stilgar, you must let us stop him and let us get rid of him," they said to him.
Stilgar then exited the camp and met up with Paul. "Look, man, you need to stop talking shit about our ancient traditions."
"Even if they put the sun in my right hand and the moons in my left hand, I will not stop," Paul said resolved.
"You're crazy as fuck but you're my nephew and I will always protect you," Stilgar assured him.
As the war continued to rage, Paul was questioned by the elders once more. "If you answer these three questions correctly, you're a prophet," they said to him.
"Shoot," Paul said confidently.
"Recount the tale of young men who ventured forth in the first age; narrate the story of a traveler who reached both the eastern and western ends of the Arrakiss; and provide details about the spirit," they ordered.
"I'll get back to you, tomorrow," Paul assured them.
Paul prayed to Gabriel and got nothing. Two weeks passed without an answer all the while the Fremen talked shit about him. A frustrated Paul got into an argument with Gabriel when he finally did show up. "You made me look like a fool. I told them I would have an answer for them the next day. It's been fifteen days!"
"Shut your bitch-ass up," Gabriel scolded. "I'm incredibly busy and the only reason why I'm even here in this sand-hole is because I made a bet with my boys. Now, here are your answers: The first answer is the young men in question slept in a cave, the traveler who reached the eastern and western ends of Arrakiss had two horns, and the nature of the spirit is incomprehensible."
"That's vague as fuck. I'm going to get stoned," Paul said.
"Tell them that shit, and they will believe," Gabriel predicted.
As it happened, none of the Fremen took Paul's vague answers seriously, but he was not stoned.
At the capital, Mon was slightly peeved by Eltro's performance. He summoned Eltro to his chambers. "Kara and the Titans want spice production at full capacity. Do you have any idea what will happen if you fail?" Mon asked him.
"A slap on the wrist?" Eltro figured.
"If you don't fix this fuck up, I'll have no choice but to take control away from you," Mon threatened.
One day, Paul went out with some Fremen to the dunes. "If you are truly a prophet, what need do you have of our help? If God sent you as his messenger, why doesn't He protect you? And if God wished to send a prophet, couldn't He have found a better person than you, a weak and fatherless orphan?" one of them asked him.
"Damn," Paul said, destroyed. "If I ride a giant sandworm, will you believe me then?"
"Maybe," they said skeptically.
Paul went up to the highest dune, placed a sonic device in the sand, and waited for the giant sandworm to arrive. He then caught and rode one like a boss impressing many, but they still remained skeptical.
Eltro grew impatient with Brainiac 5's anti-insurgency operations. He decided to move bases farther from the capital to monitor the Fremen closer. This ended up being a mistake as these smaller bases were less defended and easier to infiltrate. One night, the Fremen detonated bombs inside the fortress destroying it completely. Eltro emerged from the wreckage pissed off. Drones scurried to get to their helicopters sitting on the airfields.
"This is some bullshit," Eltro said to one drone.
"You should remain inside the perimeter," Brainiac 5 advised.
"What perimeter? They're already here," Eltro scoffed angrily.
Eltro took to the air with several helicopters following him. "We have no infrared signatures," Brainiac 5 reported as they circled around the base. The Fremen had found ways to mask their heat signature and the desert heat helped them further. It made them practically invisible on most scanners. Eltro sensed for any kind of ki signature and then fired multiple shots at a random mountain causing it to explode.
Eltro then landed along with the helicopters. The destruction of the mountain created a sandstorm giving them no visibility. Within the sandstorm, the Fremen attacked in sneak attacks. Drones started to fall all around Eltro. The surviving drones went into retreat back to their helicopters. Many of the helicopters lifting off were hit with anti-aircraft missiles exploding in midair.
Eltro fired energy blasts within the sandstorm but couldn't tell if he was hitting anything. He was then hit several times with laser beams that actually hurt him. Realizing he was on the verge of being surrounded, he took off into the air.
Earth-Metropolis
Kara had tea with Mara as she considered reports from Arrakiss in her Palace office. "It appears a Fremen prophet is giving us a run for our money," Kara mused.
"It's not the first time the Fremen have inconvenienced us," Mara reminded her.
"Not at this magnitude, holy crap," Kara said stunned as she read the reports. "Dear daughter, how would deal with this prophet?"
"Do not attack him directly. It will only humiliate us," Mara advised.
"You underestimate Insane firepower," Kara told her.
"And you underestimate faith," Mara lectured.
"You prove once again you're an astute student," Kara smiled referring to her use of Christianity to unite Earth. "How about I send in an assassin?"
"No, prophets become more powerful as martyrs when they die. Let the conflict become open war and then bring peace as the white savior," Mara said.
"You'd be a formidable empress, Mara. You have both Insane and Kryptonian powers, Kryptonian intelligence, and Insane instincts. But you lack experience. We have unlimited power, but we often do not know how and where to use it. Unlike human emperors and kings who feared invasions and rebellions, I do not. If we kill this prophet and more rise up...we simply kill them as well and keep killing until there is nothing left to kill. It's as simple as that," Kara said coldly.
"This prophet believes he receives a mission from an angel. This is the same religion you brought to Earth. What if we're fighting against God, your God?" Mara asked.
"God helps those who help themselves, their own abilities. There will be no miracle that can stop us from killing this prophet. Your father is sending Kon to Arrakiss to finish the job," Kara said.
"He's psychotic," Mara reminded her.
"That's irrelevant. What matters is whether your father and I can control him. I'd like to find out," Kara said.
Jin-Saiyan
On the Insane home world's capital city of Mon, there was a stadium shaped like a triangle. It hosted ten blocks of fifteen rows, each block separated by a band to create greater separation between the classes and make the stadium taller. Effectively, this made the stadium twenty blocks of fifteen rows. Each side of the triangle was 100 meters. There was also a smaller 100-meter ban of 5 rows toward the bottom of the stadium for elites on all sides of the triangle. The stadium had a capacity of 150,000 people but would have been twice that number if not for the dividing bans. The dividing bans, however, were important to contain infighting between enthusiastic warriors and to cement the class structure.
At the central top of the stadium was Mon's private box. With his Insane eyes, he could see with falcon vision what was happening at the ground level. Similarly, any Insane man at the ground level could look up and see Mon on his throne. The Jin-Saiyan world was entirely Mon's domain, and he took absolute control whenever he visited. A box just below Mon hosted a Titan female delegation made up of Eve, Sydne, Imra, and Jancel.
"His Insane Highness, Prince Mon-El!" the speakers boomed as Mon made his appearance. The stadium roared and chanted with near-religious devotion.
"Why are we here?" Imra asked unimpressed.
"The Insane prince is the son of the Supreme Leader and heir to the Galactic Federation throne," Sydne said obviously. "We should be here for his 'coming of age' ceremony."
"Maybe we should rethink the whole monarchy thing," Imra said dryly.
"Our claim to the Titan High Council is through family nepotism," Sydne reminded her.
"His Insane Highness, Prince Kon-El!" the stadium boomed. Again, the stadium roared and applauded with equal devotion. Kon stepped out onto the ground floor wearing a black gi and black chest armor. As he did, fireworks went off in the air. He had two short blades in his hands.
Three death-row prisoners, all Fremen terrorists, were sent out to fight Kon. They wore dark shorts and no shirt or shoes. They were all armed with one blade. Kon casually went up to the first man. The first Fremen swung his blade in a telegraphed swing. Kon easily dodged the swing and elbowed the man in the chest breaking several of his ribs. The Fremen steadied himself and went for a thrust. Kon evaded the thrust, sliced him across his gut, and then slit his throat as they circled each other.
Kon then walked up the second Fremen. He evaded the Fremen's strikes twice, blocked the third one, put him in a bind with one blade, and then slit his throat with the second blade. For the third Fremen, Kon went on the offensive with quick strikes. The Fremen managed to dodge all of Kon's attacks. Kon looked up to his father above with curiosity and then went for another round against the third Fremen. The two fought evenly with neither side getting a hit.
Impressed with this one, Kon activated a device on his armor that held synthetic Kryptonite. The Kryptonite was inside a lead case preventing it from ordinarily affecting him. With it now exposed, Kon could feel himself weaken dramatically. Mon eyed Kon with interest and so did the crowd. Kon's Kryptonian heritage was considered by some Insane to be an abomination or a liability. He was considered impure blood, a freak of nature, and many hoped Mon would put Kon aside for a proper male heir. By effectively killing his Kryptonian side with Kryptonite, Kon sent a signal to all the Insane that he was a highly skilled fighter first, an OP Super Insane second. The crowd was pleased by this gesture.
Before, Kon had purposefully reduced his power level to fight the two Fremen and the one before him. Now, he was genuinely weakened and was at the same physical level as his opponent. With each passing second, he would lose even more strength until he could no longer fight or even breathe. Kon aggressively took the initiative with rapid strikes. The Fremen kept up with Kon and tried to stall him out. With a kick, Kon swiped underneath the Fremen dropping him, and then tried to stab him through his torso. The Fremen evaded the strike at the last moment. As he was losing strength, Kon went for another aggressive series of attacks. Kon finally took the Fremen to the ground where they wrestled on the sand.
The Fremen took his blade and tried to ram it through Kon's face. Kon held the Fremen still and then stabbed him in the gut with his own blade. The Fremen finally fell dead at Kon's feet. Kon held up his blade to the roaring crowd and left the arena like a boss.
Afterward, Mon and Kon met in his chambers. "You trying to get yourself killed with that stunt?" Mon asked referring to the Kryptonite.
"My people need to see I'm more than just my Kryptonian half. My fighting tactics, skills, and mind are just as Insane as all of them," Kon said.
"Or, perhaps you just reminded them of something they would rather forget," Mon countered.
"I ought to purge anyone that challenges my claim to the throne," Kon said aggressively.
"Don't be too hasty," Mon said condescendingly. "For your coming of age, I have a gift for you: Arrakiss."
Kon's Kryptonian brain quickly calculated the risks and rewards of such a gift. "Eltro?"
"Eltro may be a good starship captain but he's a fuck-up when it comes to planetary conquest. He'll be reassigned," Mon said. "Tame Arrakiss, assure the flow of spice, and you will one day be Supreme Leader."
"Supreme Leader?" Kon considered. Now, he was competing against Eltro and Mara. "How?"
"When the other worlds see how you have tamed Arrakiss, they will fear your power, your intelligence, your Insane nature. In time, the entire galaxy will kneel before you," Mon told him.
That night, it was non-stop fireworks in the sky. Kon didn't join in on the festivities, deep in thought about his next task. He decided to go on an enthusiastic walk on a bridge leaving a large pyramid structure where his suite was located. Jancel followed him able to sense his Kryptonian thoughts among the tens of thousands of the Insane.
Kon suddenly appeared behind Jancel with a knife to her throat. "You're following me," he said obviously.
"Am I? I might have gotten lost," Jancel said innocently. "Can you show me the way back, Prince Kon-El?" she asked flirtatiously.
Kon withdrew his blade. "Who are you and why are you here?"
"I am Jancel Ardeen and I'm here to honor your coming of age," she said.
"How did you get past the guards?" Kon questioned.
"The guards? Seriously?" Jancel rolled her eyes. "May I ask what you're doing here? You're not taking part in your own celebration."
"Sedi Order," Kon identified as Jancel telepathically manipulated him.
"And what do you know of the Sedi?" Jancel asked condescendingly.
"I know your tricks won't work on me," Kon said confidently.
The two found themselves back in the pyramid in front of a row of rooms. "The fuck?" Kon wondered how he got there. He had no recollection of how he got there. Jancel had telepathically controlled him and then erased his memory like a blackout.
"This is my room," Jancel pointed out and then went inside with the door open.
Intrigued, Kon followed her inside. "Now, put your hand in the box," Jancel instructed.
"There's a dick in the box, isn't there?" Kon assumed.
Jancel placed a Kryptonite needle at Kon's throat. "Put your hand...in the box."
The next day, the Sedi women discussed Kon. Jancel gave her report on what happened the night before. "A psychopath with the following virtues: driven, cruel, and strongly motivated to win video games. He yearns to be out. He loves pain," Jancel said. Kon had not only survived the box but kept his hand in there longer than necessary under the pretext that it would make him stronger. Jancel had to tell him repeatedly that it was all telepathic pain.
"Can he be redeemed?" Eve asked.
"He's emotionally vulnerable," Jancel allowed.
"And?" Eve pressed.
"Nothing else happened. He said Sedi girls were gross and then went back to his room to play video games," Jancel frowned.
"You did well, Jancel," Eve allowed.
"With respect, why didn't you do it?" Jancel asked.
"As an older woman, I would remind him more of his own mother. I wouldn't have been nearly as effective," Eve said vaguely.
"What's his deal with his mother?" Jancel asked confused.
"Kon feels desire and humiliation for his mother, the Supreme Leader," Imra explained.
"Should Kon-El succeed on Arrakiss, we will know how to control him," Eve said cynically.
In a large auditorium filled with Insane warriors, Mon officially gave command of Arrakiss over to Kon. After the change of command ceremony, the Insane men pounded their chests declaring their loyalty to the half-blood prince. Kon then kissed Mon on the lips as a sign of loyalty and gratitude.
"What the fuck?" Mon wondered but quickly recovered.
Kon then faced the cheering Insane warriors and participated in a military parade. As expected, no Insane warrior actually left with Arrakkis as Kon relied entirely on drones. It was Insane philosophy that one warrior, perhaps two, was always sufficient to take a planet by force. If a squad was necessary, they were assumed to have a low power level and third class. This also prevented Insane infighting on a world after the conquering was accomplished.
Arrakiss
Being rejected by his own people, Paul resorted to recruiting mercenary raiders from off-world. These ostracized men were known for raiding Fremen caravans and villages. Upon hearing Paul's religious message, the raiders embraced him. Their leader, Gurney, joined the movement but Paul was suspicious of his intentions. "Ever since you have been attacking the Insane, the smuggling business has become quite profitable. I've heard many stories about you."
"Nice," Paul smiled.
"None of them pretty," Gurney frowned.
"Oh...," Paul said taken aback.
"How many men do you have?" Gurney asked.
"Two...hundred...ish," Paul exaggerated.
"You have incredible fighters but there are millions of Fremen in the South," Gurney pointed out. "You could take over the whole planet and accomplish my dream of being incredibly rich."
"Are you co-opting my religion?" Paul wondered.
"They worship you as a prophet. Use that shit," Gurney advised.
"The spice has made things clearer for me," Paul said.
"The fuck does that mean?" Gurney wondered.
"If I go South, they may not like me," Paul said lamely.
"Stop being such a pussy. Preach, Paul, preach!" Gurney pressed.
In a meeting with his followers, Paul ordered them all to give an oath to protect his ass against the Insane and hostile Fremen. "Protect me as you would protect your wives and children. In return, paradise will be your reward," he said to them all.
Paul then had a chat with Gurney away from the others at night. "I don't need to be a prophet to know what's ahead. Your path leads to war. So, war is coming. What will you do when you feel it breathing down your neck, taking you from behind, squeezing your balls?" Gurney asked.
"I don't know," Paul admitted.
"Raise an army in the South," Gurney advised. "I mean, how do you hope to win this war? Find some unsecured nukes in a cave?"
"Is that an option?" Paul wondered.
"Yeah, I found some in a cave," Gurney smiled.
In a meeting with his followers and advised by Gurney, Paul gave the order to raid the Fremen of their stuff to benefit themselves and their mission. His followers were a bit reluctant to attack their fellow Fremen, their friends and family. "Fighting has been made obligatory upon you, believers, though you dislike it. Perhaps you dislike something which is good for you and like something which is bad for you. God knows and you do not know," Paul said to them.
As his followers raided their fellow Fremen, Paul continued to drink that sweet blue giant sandworm piss to strengthen and give himself visions.
Meanwhile, Kon was ready to take charge in the command center of the capital base. Under Mon's supervision, Kon started hitting every rock formation in the general area with helicopter missile fire even if he had no idea whether Fremen were actually located there. The approach was highly expensive and couldn't verify any kills. Still, Kon was enthralled with blowing up shit.
"Once they appear on the ground, send in the drones," Kon ordered Brainiac 5.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Eltro asked unimpressed as he entered the command center.
"I think the better question is what the fuck are you doing here, Eltro. I'm the prince of all Insane. Kiss my boot," Kon ordered.
Eltro went to tackle him only to get stomped with his face right up against Kon's boot. "Kiss it...and apologize...," Kon said condescendingly. "Kiss it or die."
"No," Eltro refused.
There was an awkward silence in the room. "Well...fuck," Kon realized his bluff was called.
"Eltro, get up. You're both embarrassing me," Mon said disappointed.
In the desert, Paul plundered his own people with raiders. The local Fremen proceeded to censure him for it. Paul excused the raid as a mere misunderstanding of his orders and the locals called bullshit. Paul then mounted an even larger raid slaughtering a few dozen fellow Fremen and taking all their stuff. The tribal leader's head was then brought before him.
"The head of the enemy of God. Praise God, for there is no other but He!" Paul said pleased.
"Slay them all," Stilgar advised referring to the prisoners.
"Ransom them first. If they refuse to pay, execute them," Paul ordered.
Paul then made a speech to his followers on the desert sands. "Permission has been given to those who are being fought because they were wronged. And indeed, God is competent to give them victory. And God will surely support those who support Him. Indeed, God is Powerful and Exalted in Might."
Upon returning to his base, Paul had enough of some disgruntled poets talking shit about him in poetic ways. A female poet was slashed down as she was nursing her child. Other poets were, likewise, slain. Once the moisture in their bodies was collected, Paul declared the executions and lauded these killings as service to God and His prophet.
At the same time, Kon went through a tunnel system inside a mountain and immediately fried some birds nesting in the cave holes. "Fuck those birds," Kon said annoyed. After dealing with the birds, Kon turned to a lone spy. "Spy, the others have already left," Brainiac 5 reported. "She destroyed nine drones with this," as he handed a knife over to him.
Kon then approached the female spy. She was a mess with drone oil all over her. "You destroyed nine drones with a single blade? I'm having the most awkward boner right now," Kon admitted.
The spy said nothing to that. "You won't talk? Fine, I'll just leave," Kon said to her. "Alright, let's move out!" Kon ordered as he left the spy to herself.
Paul continued his mission and Gabriel was with him. Gabriel ordered Paul to attack a village and take their stuff. After the battle, Paul addressed the hapless villagers. "You sided against me," he accused.
"No, never," the tribal leaders said to him. "We will leave this land but let us take our moveable goods far from here."
"No," Paul said coldly.
"Then, let us simply leave with our lives," they requested.
"That I cannot do," Paul replied.
"Have one of your trusted men judge over us," they asked desperately.
"Very well. Stilgar, what should be done with them?" Paul asked.
"Men should be put to death, their possessions to be distributed among the believers, and their women and children to be taken as captives," Stilgar ruled.
"You have judged according to the very sentence of God above the seven heavens," Paul agreed and then had a thousand men massacred before him with their wives and children made slaves.
Afterward, Paul was a bit moody, so Channi went to comfort him. "If I go to the South, I'm afraid I'll lose you. You may lose the faith or cheat on me and then I'll have to execute you."
"You'll never lose me," Channi assured him.
"I know what must be done. It involves forming alliances, marrying multiple women, and collecting concubines," Paul told her.
"Do what you have to do for God," Channi told him.
South Arrakiss
Paul journeyed to the tribes in the South with his followers. On the way, he attacked a Fremen settlement and forced their surrender. Paul motioned for a teenage girl to come to him. "You are quite beautiful," Paul remarked.
"She is married," Stilgar said helpfully.
"Find her husband," Paul sighed. The husband was then brought before him. "Where is all your hidden wealth?" he asked.
The husband refused to say a word. "Torture him," Paul ordered. Stilgar and other men tortured the man for a good while, but he gave nothing up. "Behead him then," Paul ordered.
Paul then turned to the teenage girl. "Typically, I'd wait a month to fuck you...but, you're so damn beautiful," Paul said to her. "I want to fuck you every night as my new wife." The teenage girl was scared stiff for her husband and brother had already been killed in the previous massacre. She could only nod and so it was.
Paul continued his raiding march further and further south until he was in the southern hemisphere. There, he came upon a large settlement. They tested Paul's claim. "If you are truly a prophet, you will survive the piss of the giant sandworm. If you are merely a king, you will die and we will be rid of you," they said to him.
Paul then took a flask of the giant sandworm piss and drank it. He suffered pain but survived. After he had recovered, he summoned the elderly woman who had made the suggestion and had her killed. From then on, the Southern tribes of Arrakkis followed Paul. Shortly thereafter, Paul returned to the North with a massive army.
As things turned for the worst, the Super Insane family and allies had a get-together to discuss what to do in a throne room of sort. On one side were the women: Kara, Mara, Eve, Sydne, Imra, and Jancel. On the other side were the Insane men: Mon, Kon, and Eltro.
"Who is this prophet? Where could he be?" Kara asked impatiently.
"No idea," Mon said nonchalantly.
"Give me more, more, more!" Kara shouted.
"He's just a madman," Mon said dismissively.
"All Fremen are mad," Eltro added.
"That's all you know? Really?" Kara asked unimpressed.
"He's probably dead or hiding in the southern storms," Kon suggested.
"Have you investigated the south?" Kara asked.
"No," Mon said argumentatively.
"The south has several million humanoids. How are you not aware of this?" Kara asked incredulously.
"Oh, I was aware. I just didn't give a shit," Mon clarified.
"This prophet is alive. We must find him. You will find him!" Kara ordered.
Arrakiss
Paul drew up his battle plans with Channi, Stilgar, and Gurney. The storm will hit here. Stilgar, you will enter the base via the west and distract their systems. Channi, you will attack from the east to this basin. I will strike from the north. Remember, I need the Insane prince alive," Paul ordered.
Inside the Insane fortress, Kon was alone with Brainiac 5. "Your raids have been ineffective and the Fremen have a vast army in the desert. The base will soon be overrun. An interesting strategy, young prince," Brainiac 5 remarked.
"I know, right?" Kon grinned. "However,...is it Kryptonian...or Insane?" he asked concernedly.
"It's not either or. Your two natures complement the other and enhance the other. You are not half-Insane but doubly Insane," Brainiac 5 told him.
Kon nodded taking that to heart. "I'm up against God's prophet. Can I really win?"
At the start of the battle, the Fremen used sonic devices to lure the giant sandworms to their position. Paul rallied the troops. "God is Great!" Paul shouted. The crowd chanted "God is Great!" repeatedly. "Fire!" Paul ordered.
Missiles were fired toward the Insane base perimeter. They detonated a short distance from the base and spread Kryptonite shards into the air. In truth, the nukes Gurney had found were a Titan contingency plan against Kara. The Kryptonite was now being used against Kon. The explosive power of the missile created an EMP pulse and a sandstorm that knocked out power to the base.
As the battle commenced, three angels appeared in the distance watching with interest. The Fremen rode giant sandworms toward the Insane base numbering in the several dozen. The giant sandworms breached the walls and began tearing up the base structures outside the main fortress. Helicopters piloted by drones fired on the giant sandworms in vain. They were just too big. The helicopters were either shot down or got lost in the sandstorm.
A large army suddenly erupted from the sand and rushed forward. The drones retreated inside the main fortress ceding the ground to the Fremen infantry. The walls of the main fortress were eventually breached with Fremen flooding in. Not even the numerous drones could keep them back. On the throne was a Kryptonite exposed sickly-looking Kon.
Paul, Channi, Stilgar, and Gurney entered the main fortress victorious. The Fremen continued to flood into the base. "You curious to hear about the true faith? I am Paul, the last prophet of God!"
"I don't care," Kon shrugged, and then his hologram faded revealing a mere drone.
"Find him," Paul said slightly alarmed.
In low orbit, Kon considered the base. With his falcon vision, he could see a swarm of Fremen. He powered up to Super Insane and then pointed his hand at the base. "Big Bang Attack...Ah!"
A sphere of pure energy went through the atmosphere and hit the base with several megatons of explosive power. The Insane fortress was shattered and incinerated with everyone in it. The Fremen army was vaporized on the spot and the rest of the Insane base was destroyed. The worms also exploded and burned away. The sandy ground became glass from the extreme heat. In an instant, Paul, his followers, and the entire army were vaporized, incinerated, or shattered. The only ones to survive the explosion were the witnessing angels.
"Well...shit," Gabriel muttered to his colleagues.
"Do not give up hope, brothers. There is another," Raphael said.
"Indeed, and I will take care of this one, personally," Michael declared.
Kon entered the Imperial flagship's docking bay and met up with Kara, Eve, Sydne, Imra, Jancel, Mon, and Eltro in the throne room. They had never been on the surface the entire time. "Kon, what the fuck was that?" Kara asked incredulously.
"I intentionally made my forces appear incompetent to lure the Fremen and their prophet into a false sense of security. They then attacked the base all at once thinking I was there, but I wasn't. I then blasted them from space and there was this huge explosion, and it was awesome!" Kon said excitedly.
"The base is destroyed. Got any idea how long that will take to rebuild?" Kara asked annoyed.
"The Fremen won't fuck with us after this," Kon grinned.
"You couldn't have negotiated a peaceful solution?" Kara asked exhaustedly.
"Wat?" Kon asked confused.
"I just have to remind myself I'm not responsible for the sins of my son," Kara rolled her eyes.
"I don't know what you're on about. I won," Kon said adamantly.
A hologram of the planet showed nukes going off around the spice fields in retaliation for Kon's victory. Spice production would be halted indefinitely as the spice was either incinerated or deeply contaminated. A cloud of Kryptonite also surrounded the planet. "This is a total disaster. We should never have trusted the Insane or you to manage this problem," Eve said outraged.
"Why the fuck would you have Kryptonite nukes on Arrakkis? These people fight with knives and ride worms," Kara scolded. "This weapon was meant for me so you can go fuck yourself."
"Without spice production, our planet's economy will take a devastating hit," Sydne said.
"Maybe your economy shouldn't be based on getting the entire galaxy high," Kara suggested. "Barney, fix their economy."
"As you wish," Brainiac 5 replied.
Mon eyed the conversation not sure how to approach Kon's so-called strategy. "It was Kryptonian...," Mon concluded staring hard at his son. "But it was also Insane," he added. "However, since the planet is now inhospitable to you, you're fired."
"Kon, go to your room," Kara ordered him.
Kon rolled his eyes and met eyes with Mara before he exited the room. The Titans went their own way. Finally, Mon and Eltro were alone. "That boy is dangerous," Eltro remarked.
"I know," Mon agreed. "But we may have stopped a galactic jihad in its tracks, giving us room for our own jihad."
Author's Notes: This episode was partially faithful to Dune Part 2 and a certain biography of a nameless prophet who may or may not have deep similarities to the main character. Seems obvious the emperor should never have put himself on the ground and should have just nuked the Fremen from space. Or, he could have just left his daughter on Arrakis to negotiate a peace settlement. It's trying hard to use Medieval siege tactics against space aliens with spaceships that can easily escape a planet. It lacks the imagination of technology being able to track the movements of the Fremen. You have the cliche of helicopters firing missiles from close range when they can literally fire over the horizon. Villains are incredibly stupid, all of them. That said, I loved it. With this episode, I wanted to make it really unclear which side to root for as per usual in AOS. Could the Bene Gesserit control Kon? I think not.