Chapter II: Ikari Gendo
The first time I saw Yui I felt relieved. As if all my life I had been walking with a bag of stones and, suddenly, someone had decided to poke a hole. As I dropped the excess weight, I became more open to experience feelings I had thought foreign during most of my life. The last time I saw her, though, I felt anxious. The bond I had built with her was the only gift that God had ever granted me. Thence started the jealousy… I was afraid something might take her away from me, or that someone would get in the way. And, eventually, my fears were proved right. The person I loved with all my heart and wanted to share with no one dissolved into nothing. Unit 01 took her. She became one with the Eva… And the rest is history.
Isn't it strange how, after years in silence, you can't seem to forget that one person's voice? I could swear I can still hear her humming in the mornings. But then I get out of bed, search for the smell of tea and can't find it. Not even a faint scent. I walk to the kitchen and the pans are piling up in the sink. Over the trashcan, there are flies describing an oval. So I decide breakfast is for the fainthearted and head to work. Over time, I had a better idea, and refused to leave the headquarters at all. What for? All that I care about is here. The mission is here.
It has been a long walk in the desert, but I'm getting closer. I can see the whole picture, sharp. Little by little, I have been putting all the pieces together. I have suffered in silence, carrying a cross while being denied of all empathy. I have stood stoic as those around me lashed their tongues and pointed their accusatory fingers. But soon enough, it won't matter. Anything else will be devoid of meaning. I will reunite with her.