A/N: The lyrics used for this chapter is from the song Our Deal by Best Coast.

I know this chapter isn't my greatest but there wasn't more I could do, I just made sure it got where I need it to be for the story as a whole plus Emily, no matter how brave she had started off the night wouldn't talk about their problems when the opportunities arose (Much like with her mother.) and I felt that in turn that just made Naomi think the worst about her and caused the problems you'll see here.

Chapter Eleven: Searching for Naomi (Emily's POV)

2:30 Am

Emily immediately went on her mission once the hatch had closed behind her and it had been to find Naomi. Tonight was the night, Emily was going to set everything straight even if it left her without Naomi; it was all going to be laid out on the line and hopefully things would finally be okay between her and Naomi (Emily hoped at least.).

Emily passed Thomas with a smile and made her way into the party; the Music was loud, the alcohol was flowing, and people were already high and Emily hoped that those combinations would bring Emily luck tonight because she really needed it.

"Hello, Emily." Emily tries to resist the urge to roll her eyes, she knows almost instantly who had said her name: It had been Mandy and Mandy was the last person Emily wanted to see right now, the very last.

Mandy had been a girl that Naomi had started seeing a little after Emily and Naomi had first sleep together. Probably to get back at her, Emily believed now but at the time Emily had really thought they had been in love and it made Emily really hate Mandy; Emily did have other reasons for hating Mandy: not only had Mandy been rude to Naomi and her friends but she had also been extremely manipulative; always telling Naomi what to do, always putting her down, Mandy had even tried to get Naomi to stop hanging around Cook, Freddie, and JJ saying that Freddie and Cook were bad influences and JJ was a creep.

Okay, Emily agreed that Cook and Freddie were bad influences but so what they were Naomi's friends! And the part about JJ being a creep was just so outlandish that Emily had to stop herself from laughing in Mandy's face but all these reasons put together wasn't why Emily wanted to slap Mandy every time she saw her: it was because Mandy had tried to sleep with Emily while still dating Naomi.

Emily may be fucked up but there was no way in hell she was that fucked up! Emily wanted to sleep with Mandy as much as she had wanted a dick in the ass! No thank you, Emily would rather murder herself then go anywhere near Mandy and her body and Emily had told Mandy as much so but instead of taking it as a no and leaving, Mandy had made it her mission in life to win Emily over. Mandy had broken up with Naomi the next day and continued to pursue Emily for the rest of first year, that had been a year ago and Mandy still wasn't taking the damn hint.

"Mandy, what the fuck do you want?" Emily really wasn't in the mood for Mandy and her needy games who the fuck invited her anyway? Emily thought with venom, it was a well known fact that nobody at Roundview liked her.

"Don't be like that!" like what Mandy? Like someone who's tired of being stalked? Emily didn't have time for this and pushed Mandy out of her way, she just didn't have the patience to sooth anyone's ego tonight especially not Mandy's.

Never in Emily's lifetime did she ever wish she was tall until this very night, there were so many people at this party that Emily couldn't see ten feet in front of her let alone ten feet above and it was getting on Emily's nerves; how was she going to find Naomi in all this? If it hadn't been for Effy's distinct voice, Emily would have been lost in a sea of people forever.

"Later" Effy said with pat on Naomi's back and Emily was briefly confused as to why Effy was talking to Naomi but whatever the reason was it wasn't any of her business; Emily was just glad she had finally found Naomi.

Emily had started to walk over to Naomi but stopped herself when she saw the dismayed look on her face what the fuck had they been talking about? Emily was truly confused but she knew one thing for sure and that was Emily had never wanted to murder Effy before right now. Emily couldn't understand why Effy felt the need to start trouble when it came to Naomi, What was their beef? Emily knew Effy wasn't being overprotective of her because they didn't have that kind of friendship but Emily also had a feeling that Effy and Naomi's problems had nothing to do with her, Emily believed that it had started why before Emily had ever come into the picture and that Emily had just been some way for them to expression that anger without people prying and asking questions. Emily didn't like being the scapegoat for people's problems; she was already her mother's and she didn't feel the need to be anyone else's.

When you leave me
The bed is empty

"Hi, Naomi. Are you okay?" Emily asked with concern, just because she didn't like what they were using her for didn't mean she wasn't curious to know what.

Naomi didn't answer her right away and for a moment Emily thought Naomi hadn't heard her but then Naomi said, "Emily, how long you been standing there?"

Emily couldn't help but frown at that, "I wasn't eavesdropping, if that's what you mean?" Emily was kind of insulted that Naomi believed she had, Emily was a lot of things but an eavesdropper wasn't one of them.

"I wasn't saying you had! I was just asking a question, Emily." Naomi was already snapping at her and Emily could tell this was going to be a long night.

"Chill, Naomi! I'm not here to fight with you tonight." Naomi's snapping was souring Emily's mood.

"Then why are you here? Bothering me?" Emily sensed there was some double meaning behind Naomi's words but Emily didn't have the energy to figure them out.

And I feel crazy
'Cause I didn't say anything

"Did you ever stop to think that maybe everything I do doesn't revolve around bothering you, Naomi?" Emily didn't make it her mission in life to hurt Naomi day in and day out (She just always seemed to).

"Doesn't matter, Emily." Naomi looked tired as she said that, "You always do."

Those weren't Emily's intentions and it hurt that Naomi thought they were but what could Emily do to change it? "Naomi, I don't do it on purpose. I just thought it was our thing, you know?" Nice way to try and cover up, Emily! Since when was hurting people a thing to do in a relationship? Emily really wanted to know.

It seemed so did Naomi, "Since when is that a thing to do, Emily?" how was Emily to answer that? She didn't even know herself.

"Naomi, I don't want to talk about this now or at least not here." Emily didn't want to talk about this ever, "Just drop it and let's have fun, Huh?"

Naomi didn't look like she wanted to drop it but then she sighed and said, "Fine! I'll drop it," Naomi smirked and added, "If you find me so decent drugs."

Emily smiled at that because that was something Emily could do without screwing it up and she said as much so. Emily knew that even though the topic was dropped for now, it was going to have to be talked about if Emily was going to have any real future with Naomi.

Emily just didn't realize how soon it was going to come back to haunt her.

4:45 Am

"You have to be kidding me?" Naomi was laughing so hard that some of her beer spilled out of her mouth.

"No, I'm dead serious! My father and brother's idea of bonding time for about the first year after I came out was showing me nude photos from their porn magazines!" Emily laughed, taking a sip of her own beer. This night was going better then Emily thought it would, they still hadn't talked about their problems but that could wait till Naomi and she were actually together, It might even seem important than. Emily knew she was being a coward but she didn't want to ruin a good time.

Emily didn't want to ruin the fact that for the first time since they had know each other, Naomi and her were actually getting along; almost like they were friends. The high from that was too strong for Emily to break with nonsense (or so she felt).

When you leave me
You take away everything

"So, how'd you get out of that?" Naomi slurred, Naomi was at this stage of the party a mixture of high and drunk and it was quite entertaining. Emily had kept good on her promise to get Naomi some decent drugs even though at the time all anybody had was weed and Xanax, she had ended up dipping into her own stash in her back pocket to keep her promise.

You take all my money
You take all my weed

"Well… dad had been easy since he wasn't really a porn man as more of a football kind of guy, so instead we tend to watch every game together. Sometimes Katie will join in." Emily laughed a little at the puzzled look Naomi was sending her.

"Katie watches football?" Emily couldn't blame Naomi for being so skeptical. Emily had hardly believed it either, "At first, she was just doing it to keep up with her boyfriend at the time since he played for the Bristol rovers."

Naomi scoffed, "They suck!" Emily couldn't have agreed more.

"Yeah and I told her that when she had told me she was dating someone from their team and I guess she decided to check it out for herself. I think that was one of the reasons she dated him for so long just to annoy me." Emily know that was only have true, the real reason Katie stuck around to watch the games with her and dad was because it was Katie's way of showing she cared and apologizing for something that Emily still hadn't figured out, they may be twins but Emily didn't know everything about her sister."But I think she eventually came to love the game." That was also only half true; Katie could care less about football.

"So, how'd you get James' to quit?" Naomi asked.

"Oh, James still does it. I don't have the heart to tell him to stop and besides I think he should get along with at least one of his sisters." Emily couldn't count on her hands the number of times she had to stop Katie from killing James.

"You get along with your brother?" Naomi smiled a little at her own question; she had been touched in an odd way about Emily being close to her family.

"I get along with all my family." Emily left out the fact she didn't get along with her mother, she didn't consider her family anymore.

"You're not telling me something?" was Emily being so tense that Naomi could tell she wasn't being forthright? Or did Naomi just know her will enough to know when she was uncomfortable? "Is it about your mother?"

It always was, "I don't along with my mum, so what? My mum left two years ago and as far as I'm concerned she took our problems with her." Emily was leaving it at that, she didn't want to go around digging into ancient history.

"What happened? She mad because you forget to kiss Katie's ass!" Emily didn't like how Naomi had made that sound.

"You think I kiss Katie's ass?" Emily frowned. Naomi thought her problems with her mother had to do with her mother favoring Katie?

"Don't you?" Naomi raised her eyebrow.

No, Emily had stopped kissing Katie's ass the moment she had came out, it had been the first thing that Emily had been defiant about in her relationship with her sister as well as her mother and it certainly hadn't been the last thing. The only difference had been that Katie accepted the change in Emily, their mother hadn't and that was the problem between her mother and her, in retrospect it really had nothing to do with Katie and her mother's crazy obsession with Katie's supposed perfection.

"I haven't kissed my sister ass in a long time, Naomi." Emily rubbed her forehead before adding, "I don't kiss anyone's ass anymore and in there lies the problem."

"What you mean?"

Emily sighed, "The reason my mum left was because I wouldn't play perfect daughter and cater to her every whim and demand. It had nothing what so ever to do with Katie." Emily didn't want be having this conversation now, "but since you feel the need to put me on the spot I'll extend you the same favor," Emily downed the rest of her beer and asked, "Why do you hate Effy so much?" Naomi stiffened at that and Emily felt a little victorious before she mentally cursed herself she was doing it again, hurting Naomi! Emily could slap herself for being so dumb but she couldn't stop herself either, "And what does it have to do with me?"

"Not everything has to do with you, Emily." Naomi fumed, "and I'm not answering that."

"As you so sweetly pointed out just a minute ago everything has to do with me and why won't you answer the question? You want to ask me questions, blame me for everything, but what about your screw ups, Naomi?" and with that a perfect night was ruined. Emily should have known this had been too good to be true. Naomi was always assuming the worst of the people in her life and she was sick of it, sick of having to defend the people she loved.

"I should have known this was a bad idea!" Naomi yelled, slamming her beer on the floor, "I'm tired of this shit!"

"Yeah, well I'm sick and tired of always being the bad guy to you! I've fucked up and made mistakes but I'm done trying to get that through to you!" Emily wasn't even aware she was yelling now.

"Emily, what you just don't seem to understand is that you are the bad guy in all this!"

And with that Emily had had enough, "What? because I wounded your precious ego just because I fucked another girl the night we met! Well, get over it, Naomi it's not like you didn't do the same thing!" It seemed like Emily had been a fool to think that this conversation would have been better if they had been in an actual relationship, she now saw it would have probably been worse.

"What?" Naomi knew what she was talking about and Emily didn't appreciate Naomi playing dumb.

"Naomi, I'm not stupid, I know you sleep with Freddie." And somehow that was worse than what Emily had done.

I wish you would tell me
How you really feel
But you'll never tell me
'Cause that's not our deal

Naomi looked shocked for a moment before she said bitterly," Maybe we should just end this stupid fucking game and call it quiets!" Naomi said with such anger and bitterness that Emily knew there was no fixing this, it was over. They were done.

"Yeah, maybe we should." If it hadn't been for Katie's hysterical crying a few seconds later, Emily would have probably started crying herself.

Emily took her attention off Naomi and onto her sister, the sadness that Emily had felt before was quickly replace with a deep concern for why her sister was hysterical crying and why it looked like JJ had something to do with it as he came running up behind Katie.

"Emily, can we go?" Katie wasn't crying as much now but that didn't stop Emily from wanting to punch something.

"Katie, What the fuck?" Emily's confusion was turning into anger what the fuck is going on? Why does everybody keep hurting each other? Why did Emily have to keep hurting?

"Emily! Please! Let's go!" at her sister's tone, Emily took off so quick she almost fell to the ground. Emily supposed she would have had the same reaction if Katie had asked her to jump off a bride looking like she did now.

Emily never moved so fast in her life to gather up Effy and Pandora, Pandora had been easy to found since she had spent all night clinging to Thomas's arm by the DJ booth.

"Pandora, Where's Effy?" Emily didn't waste time being nice when she interrupted Pandora and Thomas' make out session.

"What you mean?" Pandora looked just as confused by Emily's frantic tone as Emily had a minute ago when Katie had come at her the same way.

"Something's wrong with Katie and I need to know where Effy is." Pandora went from confused to alarm in a matter of seconds.

"What happened to Katie?" Pandora asked pushing away from Thomas.

"I don't know!" Emily said irritated, she wasn't in the mood for twenty questions she just wanted to get Katie out of here and home. Emily just wanted to get out of here and home.

"Well, last I saw Effy She and Cook were making out." Pandora buttoned her blouse back up and stepped out of the booth.

"Where?" Emily said impatiently.

"Over by the bar." Pandora pointed her finger in the direction of the bar.

"Come on." Emily didn't wait for Pandora to follow; she knew Pandora would come on her own time and besides she didn't have time to play catch up.

After Emily pushed what seemed like a million people out of her way in her quest toward the bar, Emily finally made it to Effy who looked like she was one step from doing Cook right then and there. Like with Pandora, Emily didn't feel like she was cock-blocking when she pulled Effy out of Cook's embrace.

"What the fuck, Emily?" Cook slurred but Emily ignored him as well as Effy's glare.

"Katie's in trouble and I need the keys!" Emily shouted.

"Katie's in trouble?" Emily rolled her eyes at Effy's concerned face she didn't have time for this!

"Effy, Keys!" Effy groped around in her pockets and pulled out her keys a few moments later, "What's wrong with Katie?" but Emily didn't stick around to answer her as she snatched the keys away from Effy and headed back to her sister.

Emily could have made the record books with how fast she ran back to her sister but she wished she hadn't because what Emily saw next made Emily's heart break a million and one times for her sister, Katie punched JJ.

Emily had been so shocked by her sister's actions that she had barely heard Katie's "Fuck off, JJ!" she had also been so shocked that she hadn't been able to move when her sister had pushed her out of the way as she ran out of the party. Emily wasn't shocked by the fact that Katie had punched someone; she had seen Katie punch people plenty of times but what had been different was that she had punched JJ. JJ of all people, he couldn't hurt a fly!

"You better go catch up to you sister." Naomi didn't look at her when she said. Emily took a look at JJ and instantly knew the same look of shock and numbness on JJ's face was on hers as well and with one last look at Naomi: Emily left.

If you had asked Emily about this night later, Emily would have told you that she could distinctly remember auguring between Pandora and Effy on who was sober enough to drive, she could also remember holding her sister as she cried her eyes out in the backseat, but what Emily couldn't have told you was that letting go of Naomi had such a rippling affect inside her that she could have believed she had died a little inside that night and what had bothered Emily the most about it was that in the back of Emily's mind she hadn't been that surprised.

I wish you would tell me
How you really feel
But you'll never tell me
'Cause that's not our deal