"Were you planning on flying out to Vegas again for Christmas?"
Erin smiled as she shook her head. "No. Alan wants the kids for Christmas, which is his right, since we unexpectedly took them for Thanksgiving. And I think David wants a quiet holiday at home. Though if you could convince Diana to fly out here, we'd not say no to having her, and you, at our home for the holiday. I know how much she detests flying, though."
Spencer nodded as he plopped down into the chair across from her desk. "I suppose I could see if she'd agree to that. Would it just be Mom at your house?"
She smiled as she shook her head. "No. I know that you have your own apartment, your own life, but if Diana is going to be here for Christmas, I would love to have you at the house, too. And since the kids aren't going to be with their father until Christmas Day itself, we could celebrate together on Christmas Eve. But this all relies on being able to convince Diana to fly here."
"I'll get to work, then. I only have two weeks to convince her." Spencer stretched out his legs as he folded his hands over his stomach. The move was so reminiscent of David that she had to smile as she rested her arms on her desk to watch him. "Thanksgiving was so much better than I expected."
"Wasn't it? And I thought Diana was with us for most of the time we spent together. But you would know her better."
"No, you're right. She was very lucid while we were there. Though you should know that I might slip up and call you Irina now and again. It fits better with Diana."
"That's why I chose Erin. It was so similar to my previous name, I could still feel a connection to my old life. I wish I could go back to it, but everyone knows me professionally as Erin. It might be nice to have something that's just ours, though. Since I know that Mom isn't really appropriate right now, maybe ever."
Erin felt like she was babbling, but from the pleased smirk on Spencer's face, she surmised that he found it somewhat amusing. "I can do that, Irina." A faint blush bloomed in her cheeks as she looked over at her computer. "I suppose that I should tell you my other reason for coming here. Since we're home for the rest of the week, I'm free for lunch today. Would you like to head out?"
"I'd love that. Just let me tell Helen that she's free to got wherever she'd like, and we can head out?"
Spencer nodded as he stood up once more. Erin took the brief moment to stare at him, wanting to impress these flashes on time on her heart. There was so much lost time to make up for, and she knew that there would never be enough, even if she lived to see one hundred. Rising to her feet, she went to his side and patted his arm before grabbing her purse off the coatrack and heading out.
"Early lunch, Erin?" Helen asked without even looking away from her computer.
"Yes, Spencer and I are going to eat together. So that means you're free to go wherever you want." Helen gave her a flash of a smile before going back to her work. "I don't know when we'll be back, so send all my calls to voicemail, please."
"Of course. Enjoy the afternoon with your son."
Erin nodded as Spencer came over to her side, and together, they walked out to the elevators. "Did you let David know that we'd be occupied for lunch?"
"Yeah. He was the one who suggested this, actually. He thinks that we need to spend more time together alone, getting to know each other better. He took how well the holiday went to be the opening that we needed."
"Oh," she said, sounding too breathless for her liking. "I'm hoping that he's right. I just haven't wanted to push anything, since this ball will always be in your court, given how I lied for so long."
They stepped into the elevator after a few people had gotten off, and he steered them towards the back of the car, so that they could keep talking, even if others got on. "You can't keep flagellating yourself, Irina. We've crossed that proverbial bridge, and now we're forging a future as a whole family. If we keep living in the past, we never get to see the future."
She let out a quiet sigh as she nodded. "I was told the same thing when I was in rehab. Both times. It's just a really hard lesson for me to learn."
"Well, now you'll have another voice to speak that lesson to you gently." She looked up into his face, seeing that he was giving her a knowing smile. "Do you have a sponsor?"
She nodded. "She's a lovely woman, and we meet every other week for coffee, and I can call her whenever I want. I don't do meetings, it was hard enough to find a sponsor."
"I like the anonymity of meetings. But I can see where that would be the worst thing for you, given what I know about you, and what Dave's been telling me while we're on cases. He, he told me that it would be difficult for you to open up to me because you're such a private person."
Erin licked her lips before hitching up one shoulder, looking at a spot above his shoulder before she answered. "He's right. I don't open up to other people, and it's because of what I did to you. I learned how to keep secrets close to my chest, and then it became all too easy to be a secret keeper, and have other people talk to me. The only person who I trusted with almost all my secrets was Alex, and we all know how that worked out. Even if we are growing closer again."
"I am glad that you two are reaffirming your friendship," he said as he guided her out of the elevator and over to the doors. The moment they stepped outside, Erin felt much more at ease, and she gladly slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, allowing him to guide her down the sidewalk to one of the nearby cafés. "I know that James is going to away on a short term assignment this Christmas, maybe you could invite her over, too?"
"I like the way you think," Erin replied with a smile as they approached the podium. Surprisingly, there was an open table, despite it being the lunch hour, and she sat so that she could watch the door. "Though that would mean that I have to do extra Christmas shopping. You might have to twist David's arm and get him to hand over his AmEx card."
Erin giggled nervously, hoping her joke landed well, and then Spencer let out a little laugh as he shook his head. "Somehow, I think that you would be better at persuading him to open his wallet. But since we're talking about gifts, what would you both like?"
"I want some of your art," she replied quickly, certain that it was a stupid request. "Aaron's made mention of your sketches before, and I've never seen them. I, I'd like a piece to put in my office. David, he's happy with anything, since he says that he doesn't need anything. Though you can never go wrong with a good cigar and a bottle of whiskey."
"Doesn't that put your recovery at risk?"
She shook her head. "No, not really. I'm the one who puts my recovery at risk. I almost lost my progress earlier this year." She didn't want to reveal why that had happened, but he still reached across the table to take hold of her hand and give it a soft squeeze before he looked up at their server.
"Are y'all ready to order?" the young woman asked, and Erin nodded along with Spencer. She was glad for the interruption to her thoughts, as she didn't want to reveal further secrets in public. Though she did hope that they could have a more in depth conversation later on, when they were alone, and she could feel free to cry without embarrassing herself.