Continue On, Struggler. | Chapter Seven, Hang Nail. (Part One)

…

Guts turned six without any fanfare. Then, with just as little trouble, a little over a year passed and he turned seven.

Days came, days went, and he went about his usual routine. Magic lessons with Roxy in the morning. Sword practice with Paul in the afternoon. The same old, same old really. Not much changed.

He had improved in both, at the very least. In fact, over that time, he had improved to the point of earning Intermediate-rank in both swordplay and magic. Though, it had been to varying degrees.

When it came to the sword, Guts was Intermediate-tier in Sword God and Water God, but Paul had only promoted him in the prior a few days ago when Guts managed to land a hit on him during sparring. The rank-up in the latter had come months beforehand after he successfully staved off and countered a full-on barrage of strikes from his father. All that, in theory, meant that he was technically equally skilled in both, but he was a little better at Water God.

Magic was another story. A similar story, but still another one entirely.

Roxy, first and foremost, specialized in attack magic. It's what she focused on in her own studies, and it's what she taught him. It came in four types, all of which a magician could specialize in: Fire, Water, Wind, and Earth. Roxy could use Water magic up to a Saint-tier level, making her a Water Saint-class Magician. In comparison, Guts could probably now be considered a Fire Intermediate-class Magician. He could cast some Intermediate-level Wind spells too, but in general, he was much better with Fire spells. Everything else was still stuck at Beginner.

At first, Guts found the difference annoying and figured that there was something wrong with him, but Roxy explained that the opposite was the case. It was natural to specialize in a certain element. In fact, it was so common, magicians thought to give fancy names to both sides: "affinity schools" and "opposition schools."

According to Roxy, the most likely reason he excelled at Fire and Wind, and not Water or Earth, was because he favored the first two and disliked the others for some reason. The reason could be a number of things, she explained, but in the case of opposition schools, the most likely explanation was some sort of bad experience with the elements outside of magic.

Water was easy to explain. He'd nearly drowned a couple of times in his past life.

Earth was harder to explain, though. To the point where he eventually stopped trying to.

Setbacks aside, things in his life were going about as well as anyone expected.

…

"Hey, Rudy, do you mind if we end the lesson here today?" The question had come out of the blue.

Guts—who was attempting to cast Stone Cannon, an Intermediate-tier Earth spell—lost all concentration. That instant, the small stone that had formed at the tip of his wand fell to the ground. Limp and harmless. Landing on the ground with a dull, irritating silence. He cursed under his breath and then shot a glare at his teacher, who looked away before he could catch her eyes.

"Oops," she said. Her voice was as flat as usual, although clearly still embarrassed. "Was that my fault?"

What the hell? 'Course, it was your fault…

Guts let out a heavy sigh, then let himself fall back onto his ass. He basked in the shade of the usual tree with his eyes closed. He took a moment to collect himself, his head hot and fried as it was. The shade and silence helped him do that.

In short, he was frustrated. Not just with Roxy, but with himself. That had been his tenth consecutive failure at casting that spell.

When he felt calm enough to reopen his eyes, Guts saw that Roxy was sitting out in front of him. Legs tucked underneath her. A mixture of guilt and worry showed itself through her eyes. Again, he cursed under his breath. By far, concern was the last thing he wanted to see from his teacher.

"What job did you forget about this time?" he asked, mostly to avoid having to answer one himself.

It hadn't happened a lot, but it sure as shit happened a lot more than once over the years. At first, Guts thought her to be a hopeless scatterbrain, but after knowing her for so long, it became clear that she was the type who couldn't sit still. The type who got antsy doing nothing. The type who worked so hard to avoid that feeling, that she piled up things to do until it caught up to her in one way or another.

Knowing her, and knowing her reasoning, he could never really hold moments like this against her.

Besides, less time with her meant more time to practice his swordsmanship and he could never turn an opportunity like that down.

"Just the usual crop watering, don't worry."

…Who the hell said I was worried?

"I accepted the request a week ago, so it just slipped my mind until now." She bowed her head a little in apology. "I'll be sure to make it up to you tomorrow."

Guts hummed and waved his teacher off. She nodded, stood, and walked down the road leading to town.

Once she was out of sight, Guts got himself up and rolled his shoulders. Unexpected as it may be, he knew that he needed to spend this free time wisely.

Paul was going to put him through his paces today, Guts was sure of it. His father wanted to make sure he's really mastered all of the Beginner Sword-God techniques he's learned. That meant sparring. And sparring meant that, if he had anything to clean up, he needed to snuff those out now.

Alright then… He turned and went for the practice sword that he had left leaning against the tree behind him. Should I just start from the—

—Snap!

Guts's instincts flared. Screamed, really. Screamed that he was in danger. That he needed to run, snatch his sword up, and get ready to fight. However, before he could, he forced them into submission and chided himself for being so jumpy.

It's been seven years. And, even after all that time, he still needed to remind himself from time to time he wasn't in danger here. That he was no longer branded, and there were no dark spirits chasing after him. He was just a normal seven-year-old kid now, growing up in a village so safe and secure it'd be more likely to bore a man to death before actually killing him.

What the hell did he even have to be afraid of anyways? A bunch of dumbass kids trying to get back at him for lobbing a rock at one of their heads? One of the monsters his father talked about, but never once let get close enough to the village to matter? This was one of the safest places in the world. He didn't need to be so on edge anymore.

"Who's there?" Guts called out. He stood still a moment, waiting for any sort of response, then moved to get his sword. "Pick a fight with someone else, if that's your aim. I ain't got the time today."

By the time he turned around, no one responded. He scanned his surroundings to make sure he was actually alone. That's when he noticed movement down at the bottom of the hill.

Guts felt a spike of annoyance run through him when he saw who it was. So strong that it nearly made him throw his head back. It was Laws's daughter, Sylphiette. The steepness of the hill had made him miss her at first, but now, she was walking up it. Towards him.

"H-Hello…" That was the first thing that came out of her mouth. It was a shaky start, to say the least.

In fact, everything about her screamed shaky—not just her voice. She was struggling to look him in the eyes, her feet were in constant motion under her, and he could tell that she was wringing her hands behind her back.

Guts raised a brow at that. "You have some sort of business with me?"

Slyphiette flinched. He blinked, confused, then remembered they hadn't spoken in over a year and her discomfort made sense. They were still strangers, basically. The only thing linking them was a random encounter. So, she acted accordingly. Although, it did make him wonder why she was trying to speak to him now. So long after it happened. But then again, it's not like that mattered.

"W-What?" She fumbled with her answer. "I-I mean, not really."

Guts hummed, not at all impressed. "Then, what are you doing here?"

Sylphiette went silent. For a while. To the point where Guts wondered if he should cut his losses, save them both the trouble, and practice at home. But then, right as he was about to announce his leaving, she managed to cobble together an answer, "T-That girl you're always here with. The one with the blue hair and big hat? My papa told me a little about her. She's a magician, right? A person who can use magic spells and stuff?"

"Roxy? Yeah. Wouldn't be much of a magic tutor if she couldn't."

"'Magic… tutor…?'" The girl let the words off her tongue, confusion and curiosity leaking into every syllable. "You're learning to use magic?"

Guts nodded.

"But every time I see you, you're always swinging that sword around."

"That's because I'm learning to do both."

Her red eyes suddenly widened in realization. "Really, but isn't that hard?"

"No," Guts said, shrugging the question off. He meant it too. Compared to his past life, his current one was easy. A leisurely stroll compared to an all-out sprint. One not without its setbacks, but he wasn't going to complain. He couldn't. Doing so felt like its own insult to his past self in a way. "It just seems that way to you because you're not the one doing it."

Case in point, at some point, he moved over to the tree and started taking practice swings at it. All without realizing it. By now, the action was so ingrained that he didn't even need to think about it. He just did it. That's how easy it was.

"H-Huh?" His answer didn't seem to enlighten the girl at all, but then again, she was still just a kid.

"Don't worry about it."

"Ah, okay…"

Guts rolled his eyes. Not gonna get many answers looking at the ground like that, y'know?

The conversation died off from there.

Guts had expected the girl to get bored and leave once it did. She didn't. Instead, she sat a ways away from him. Knees drawn to her chest and face hidden behind them. Seemingly content to watch him in silence. And they were silent. For a while. A long while. 'Til the Sun started to set and stained the sky a deep orange. Not a single word was spoken.

Guts didn't mind. As far as long-eared, elven tag-a-longs went, this one was far less noisy. That automatically made her the best one he's ever had.

…

The stillness and silence persisted. Then, Guts noticed the sunset and figured it was about time to head back home.

"Um…" Sylphiette broke their strange stalemate, stopping him as he was already halfway down the hill. "B-Before you leave?" He half-turned to face her and once again found her acting all meek and sheepish. "Would you mind if I came back here tomorrow?"

"Hm? Why?"

"…"

Guts felt his brow twitch. She wouldn't even meet his gaze. "I'll be busy with my magic lessons."

"I-I'll be sure to come after!" The girl flinched at the volume of her own voice. She shrunk back, pulling herself back to her usual timidity. "Even if it's for a little while…"

He scoffed and started back down the hill. "Do whatever you want," he said, without looking back, "It's not like this is my hill or anything."

"O-Okay! I'll see you tomorrow! B-Bye, Rudy!"

…What the hell's got you so excited?

…

Guts had to admit—despite not offering much in terms of words, Sylphiette kept to hers.

Ever since that first day, the moment Roxy left, Sylphiette would appear. She'd greet him and then spend the rest of that time watching him practice. In silence.

At first, her presence didn't bother him. How could it? Most of the time, she made herself so unobtrusive that she melted into the scenery. Then, after the first week, a question ran through the forefront of his mind: what exactly was she getting out of this?

That's when her presence really started to annoy him.

"How come you keep coming here anyways?" Guts asked, a week after the question first popped into his head. He brought his practice sword over his head. "I mean, all you do is sit there." Then, he brought the sword down. "That can't be very fun, can it?"

"N-No!" As expected, Sylphiette was quick to deny his assumption. "Ah! I-I mean, I do! I have a lot of fun watching you."

"Really?" Guts snorted. He didn't buy it. Not for a moment. She seemed panicked enough to be telling the truth, but there was desperation in how she corrected herself and it gave away her true intentions with immediacy. "You don't expect me to believe that, do you?"

She was lying. It was obvious. To him, and to herself.

"I-I'm sorry. Am I annoying you?"

"…Nah, not really." Guts shrugged and took another practice swing. And he meant it too. After all, he barely even noticed she was there most of the time. 'Annoy' just felt like too strong a word for what he felt toward her. "I still don't get why you don't go and do something else, though."

"D-Do something? Like what?"

The hell you asking me for? He chided and took another swing, this time, putting more of himself into it. I'm the one who asked the question, kid.

"I don't know. Anything?" A part of him was tempted to keep from answering at all and just let the question hang in the air between them. Make her think long and hard about it. Then, he realized that probably wouldn't change much at all. He'd be proactive if she refused to be. "There's got to be a lot more interesting things for you to do than watch me train."

Sylphiette didn't respond at first, and after a few more swings of his sword, Guts realized that she wasn't planning on responding at all.

"Suit yourself," he said, regretting his previous question. He wanted to take it back, or for her to give it back herself.

People like her didn't deserve those kinds of hand-outs.

…

A day later, Sylphiette broke her silence.

"C-Can I ask you a question?"

"Hm?" Guts hummed and shot the girl a sideways glance. A silent bid for her to continue, knowing that she wouldn't otherwise. Because for whatever reason, and he had learned this about her over the past few weeks, she seemed to be under the impression that she needed his permission to breathe. That was, if he didn't do anything to indicate she could continue, she'd take his silence as an outright 'no.'

"A-A year ago, when you fought Somal and the others…" The girl's eyes shifted from left to right, before ultimately finding purchase elsewhere. "D-Did you mean what you said?"

Guts let out a sigh and released control of the stone floating at the end of his wand. It fell to the grass harmlessly, landing silently. His arm fell alongside it, in unison, as he turned to face Sylphiette fully.

Idly, as she mustered up whatever emotion she needed to continue, Guts's mind drifted over to the rock at his side. The one he had conjured and let go. Today was a rare day. At least for him, it was. Instead of practicing his swordsmanship after Roxy's lesson, he had chosen to spend it practicing magic. Why? Because during said lesson, after about a year of trying, he had finally been successful in casting an Intermediate-tier Earth spell, Stone Cannon, and he wanted to commit the process to muscle memory. The spell seemed too useful not to.

By all accounts, Stone Cannon was just the bigger, more powerful brother of Rock Bullet. A Beginner-tier Earth-spell. The Beginner-tier Earth-spell. The first one Roxy taught him. The difference between the two in his head was simple. It was the same difference as his old repeating crossbow and arm cannon. Rock Bullet took less time to use and would be good for lighter, more rapid ranged attacks. Stone Cannon needed a longer chant to cast but did a lot more damage. That made it better suited for larger, more armored enemies. "A spell that could kill just about anything," according to Roxy. Knowing all that, how the hell could he not try and get the hang of it?

"Um, Rudy…?" Sylphiette's voice jarred him back to the conversation at hand.

"If you want an answer, you've gotta be more specific," Guts said, even though he figured out what she was referring to immediately. He just hated the way she skirted around the subject. "It's not like I remember everything that comes out of my mouth."

"Y-Y'know, what you said… about not meaning to help me?"

"Of course I meant it." His words made her flinch. Or maybe it was the lack of hesitation. Either way, it was clear that wasn't what she wanted to hear—like that was going to stop him. She asked. She was going to get his honest answer. No bullshit. "Why the hell would anyone stick their neck out for you of all people?"

The girl's eyes found him then. There was hurt in them. Panic, too. "But when father and I—"

"—But nothing. I told my father the truth. You two were the ones who made up that story, not me." Guts spoke plainly. Honestly. Without any malice or anger, but he made sure to get his irritation across. If Puck was here, there was no doubt the bug would chew his ear off for being cruel. "Thanks to you and your old man, I guess. You two chose a good time to step in. Helped me get out of an argument. But, outside of that? Forget it. I don't think we have a single thing to do with each other."

Was he being cruel? Maybe, but that didn't stop what he was saying from being the truth. His truth, at the very least. And, honestly, every time she showed her face here, the same question kept coming to mind.

Why was she coming here day after day? They weren't friends. Before he threw that rock at that Somal kid, they were complete strangers. Then, a year after the fact, she shows up and acts as though she can hang around him like some sort of sad kitten. Yeah, right. The idea would've been hilarious to him if it wasn't so damn pathetic.

What the hell did the girl expect to happen? For him to welcome her with open arms? To squeeze some sort of sympathy out of him? To pity her, maybe? Why? The hell would he do that for? To him, sympathy needed to be earned. Something you got by actually trying, not just standing there and taking it. And that's exactly what she was to him. Someone so scared of everything that she made trying into some impossible feat.

Guts hated people like that. As is, she wasn't even worth feeling anything towards. Other than abject apathy.

"Nothing to say, huh?"

Honestly, the girl didn't need to say anything. Tears had already formed in the corner of her eyes. And, with how tightly her face was wound, it was clear that she was only barely holding back a full-blown sob. Good. That meant he got his point across.

"Guess I should be too surprised."

Right then was her cue to leave. To run away with her tail tucked between her legs. To go salvage whatever pride she had left, but that's not what happened.

Sylphiette didn't budge an inch, save her sinking down and curling into a ball. She buried her head in between her knees. As if it would protect her from his words.

"Whatever." Guts huffed and rolled his eyes then made to leave. He wasn't going to waste any more time or energy on her. "Do me a favor tomorrow. Stay home, stay away from here, and stay away from me. Unless you really do hate yourself or something."

With those final words, he left. He never expected to see her again.

…

Chapter End.

A/N: Happy almost New Year! I wanted to get another chapter out before the end of the year, but I realized with the length of the chapter (there are about another 4 thousand words to edit), it'd take another week+ to finish. So, I'm gonna cut this chapter in half and post them separately. Oh, also, before you ask, I am aging up Guts/Rudy in this story.